Fear of (Turkey) Frying: a journey in pictures

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Documenting the process for those who live in more sensible corners of the world.

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v489/stephenx/Fear%20of%20Frying/fry1.jpg
The site is prepared. Note fire-retardant sandpit and observation stand. Longneck-stocked cooler alarmingly absent.

― Stephen X (Stephen X), Saturday, 26 November 2005 05:17 (eighteen years ago) link

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v489/stephenx/Fear%20of%20Frying/fry2.jpg
Approaching optimum temperature of 335 degrees Fahrenheit. The cul-de-sac smells like a fairground concession stand.

― Stephen X (Stephen X), Saturday, 26 November 2005 05:18 (eighteen years ago) link

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v489/stephenx/Fear%20of%20Frying/fry3.jpg
Yes, 3.5 gallons of peanut oil.

― Stephen X (Stephen X), Saturday, 26 November 2005 05:18 (eighteen years ago) link

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v489/stephenx/Fear%20of%20Frying/fry4.jpg
The bird is washed and prepared for sacrifice. Special appearance by Dad X, officiating.

― Stephen X (Stephen X), Saturday, 26 November 2005 05:18 (eighteen years ago) link

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v489/stephenx/Fear%20of%20Frying/fry5.jpg
Approaching immersion. Single asbestos glove both stylish and functional.

― Stephen X (Stephen X), Saturday, 26 November 2005 05:18 (eighteen years ago) link

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v489/stephenx/Fear%20of%20Frying/fry6.jpg
The point of no return.

― Stephen X (Stephen X), Saturday, 26 November 2005 05:19 (eighteen years ago) link

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v489/stephenx/Fear%20of%20Frying/fry7.jpg
Begin 48 minutes of standing around. Off camera, grandfather mentions how much this reminds him of slaughtering hogs. Hair-raising details follow.

― Stephen X (Stephen X), Saturday, 26 November 2005 05:19 (eighteen years ago) link

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v489/stephenx/Fear%20of%20Frying/fry8.jpg
So, how about those Spurs? Retired Marine across the street mentions how much this reminds him of Desert Storm.

― Stephen X (Stephen X), Saturday, 26 November 2005 05:19 (eighteen years ago) link

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v489/stephenx/Fear%20of%20Frying/fry9.jpg
Transformation complete.

― Stephen X (Stephen X), Saturday, 26 November 2005 05:20 (eighteen years ago) link

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v489/stephenx/Fear%20of%20Frying/fry10.jpg
Greaseproof bucket ready to receive the baby.

― Stephen X (Stephen X), Saturday, 26 November 2005 05:20 (eighteen years ago) link

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v489/stephenx/Fear%20of%20Frying/fry11.jpg
A lovely bird.

― Stephen X (Stephen X), Saturday, 26 November 2005 05:20 (eighteen years ago) link

(Interrupting to say I've had fried turkey before, as prepped in this fashion -- v. tasty!)

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Saturday, 26 November 2005 05:20 (eighteen years ago) link

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v489/stephenx/Fear%20of%20Frying/fry12.jpg
The people approve! Next year: Two turkeys, extra fire insurance.

― Stephen X (Stephen X), Saturday, 26 November 2005 05:21 (eighteen years ago) link

Wow thanks for those pics. I am enlightened beyond measure. The concept both frightens and awes me.

is it really greasy? Or just good?

― Trayce (trayce), Saturday, 26 November 2005 05:24 (eighteen years ago) link

Amusingly, I didn't actually eat any, being a vegetarian. Those who did, though, claim that it isn't at all greasy--just extra juicy. Apparently the heat seals the skin and the bird cooks in its own natural juices.

― Stephen X (Stephen X), Saturday, 26 November 2005 05:27 (eighteen years ago) link

I believe the true purpose of this process is to get otherwise bothersome people out of the kitchen and into the driveway, where they can stand around drinking beer all afternoon.

― Stephen X (Stephen X), Saturday, 26 November 2005 05:30 (eighteen years ago) link

I still haven't tried any fried turkey. Did this bird get the flavor injections?

― I do feel guilty for getting any perverse amusement out of it (Rock Hardy), Saturday, 26 November 2005 05:34 (eighteen years ago) link

This one didn't get the Cajun botox, but those are supposed to be good. Mom only allowed frying to take place if it wouldn't add any nonsense to her cooking regimen.

― Stephen X (Stephen X), Saturday, 26 November 2005 05:42 (eighteen years ago) link

Those who did, though, claim that it isn't at all greasy--just extra juicy. Apparently the heat seals the skin and the bird cooks in its own natural juices.

Pretty much -- it was a nice switch from the usual drier turkey I'm familiar with.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Saturday, 26 November 2005 05:48 (eighteen years ago) link

Dry turkey is indeed a blight. Most cafeteria turkey has a texture like art gum erasers.

― Stephen X (Stephen X), Saturday, 26 November 2005 05:58 (eighteen years ago) link

one month passes...

I am a latecomer but I just had to pipe in and say that I love this thread so very, very much, and if Stephen X ever gets, like, his own talk show, then and only then will I procure the cable TV.

― quincie, Wednesday, 11 January 2006 21:08 (eighteen years ago) link

Truly a mega tasty treat.

― Forksclovetofu (Forksclovetofu), Wednesday, 11 January 2006 21:29 (eighteen years ago) link

Thanks, Q! I don't think I'd be able to convince anyone to work as my sidekick, but if I ever do I'll notify Comcast on your behalf.

― Stephen X (Stephen X), Wednesday, 11 January 2006 21:43 (eighteen years ago) link

one year passes...

this shit is good

― gershy, Thursday, 22 November 2007 04:08 (sixteen years ago) link

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