the macy's thanksgiving day parade: the pinnacle of american culture?

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billy ray cyrus. no doubt. a musical featuring a dance number to robert palmer's 'simply irresistible.' the wwf's vince mcmahon. tons of nbc tie-ins (jill hennessy, the cast of scrubs). freaking elmo*. usually i spend 364 days a year forgetting about most of american culture. this year obviously things have been slightly different. (at least lee greenwood isn't scheduled to appear.) it doesn't makes this parade, that is so often referred to as the 'macy's day parade' (yay branding), a little less jarring, but still ...

can i just get over myself and enjoy this parade and being with my family? or is this a case of the sheer overwhelming blandness of american culture once again driving someone into a rage?

*for the record, elmo sucks, mainly because his warm, fuzzy cooing 'my best friend is a fish!' bullshit was designed to take screen time away from GROVER, the coolest muppet to grace sesame street.

maura, Thursday, 22 November 2001 01:00 (eighteen years ago) link

for the record, the cast of 42nd street is now dancing to 'the lullaby of broadway.'

maura, Thursday, 22 November 2001 01:00 (eighteen years ago) link

Send in Jello Biafra!

Will, Thursday, 22 November 2001 01:00 (eighteen years ago) link

I think the old time sqaure queens and the bitter DUMBO artists should preform a strip show orgy on elmos lap.

anthony, Thursday, 22 November 2001 01:00 (eighteen years ago) link

Send in GWAR!

Will, Thursday, 22 November 2001 01:00 (eighteen years ago) link

i am currently watching a very grainy, fuzzy, color-variable macy's thanksgiving parade on the tv in my bedroom in my parents house soundtracked by piano magic's "bliss out vol. 13" and it's quite a jarring experience, to say the least.

maura, the day you can get over it and enjoy it with your family is the day that a small part of you dies. fight the power. or just start drinking early, like i have.

jess, Thursday, 22 November 2001 01:00 (eighteen years ago) link

scratch that: when you can just put it away and start enjoying the MUMMERS parade with your family, then it's time to pack it in.

jess, Thursday, 22 November 2001 01:00 (eighteen years ago) link

alas, jess, for me 2001 is mummermania -- i have all those weekly appearances to write about for work, not to mention the fancy brigade finale & the mummersfest right before the parade starts. i doubt i'll go to the new year's parade though because i am a TOTAL WUSS when it comes to standing in the cold for extended lengths of time.

maura, Thursday, 22 November 2001 01:00 (eighteen years ago) link

you poor soul.

new years day 1998, woke up at 6 am with a screaming hellbound hangover in my girlfriends house south of broad st. who had already departed that morning for home in virginia. by the time i had showered and got my shit together and stumbled into the harsh daylight of regret (and the outside) i had COMPLETELY FORGOTTEN ABOUT THE PARADE. i stepped into the middle of broad st., completely oblivious to the masses of people thronging the area around broad and pine, until i was SWEPT UP in the middle of a mummer brigade. disoriented and confuzzled, i walked with those banjo playin freeks for four blocks, until a cop chased me off. i hate the mummers.

(cue someone, anyone: what in the HELL are the mummers?)

jess, Thursday, 22 November 2001 01:00 (eighteen years ago) link

10:27 am, est: who in the fuck is Billy ISawHisLastNameButForgotAlready, and why is Kim Gordon's voice (thanks to the magic of the mute button and a hi-fi) coming out of his prepoobessin mouth?

jess, Thursday, 22 November 2001 01:00 (eighteen years ago) link

well, i suppose i already answered my own second question there.

jess, Thursday, 22 November 2001 01:00 (eighteen years ago) link

10:49...there has been no scarier sight thus far than the middle droney section of track 9 on "sister" soundtracking the sesame street crew swaying back and forth like muppets on heroin..is it possible to be a (live human) person working in childrens tv and not look/act like a child molester?

jess, Thursday, 22 November 2001 01:00 (eighteen years ago) link

i switched to the real world. i think have a crush on the bad bleached blonde. but unfortunately it evaporates every time she opens her mouth. oh well.

jess, Thursday, 22 November 2001 01:00 (eighteen years ago) link

Is BarneyTM there? He makes me money :-)

Mark C, Thursday, 22 November 2001 01:00 (eighteen years ago) link

Yeah that girl from the Real World is hot.

Ronan, Thursday, 22 November 2001 01:00 (eighteen years ago) link

it's those big doe eyes and the studded belts. kills me every time.

jess, Thursday, 22 November 2001 01:00 (eighteen years ago) link

She's sooo indie.

Ronan, Thursday, 22 November 2001 01:00 (eighteen years ago) link

which means that everyone else on this board is too embarassed/hip to admit they fancy her.

jess, Thursday, 22 November 2001 01:00 (eighteen years ago) link

It was dull, but Jess's story about getting swept up by the mummers is wonderful!

Maria, Thursday, 22 November 2001 01:00 (eighteen years ago) link

Oh surrrprise. There's a Real World marathon. I bet there's an SNL marathon on Comedy Central. I wouldn't be able to verify that 'cause the wife and the sister-in-law are currently embroiled in the Buffy marathon.

Andy, Thursday, 22 November 2001 01:00 (eighteen years ago) link

I'm sorry Maura, but the pinnacle of American culture is unDOUBTedly the Marshall Fields Jingle Elf parade.

turner, Friday, 23 November 2001 01:00 (eighteen years ago) link

I think all this explains why I spent Thursday reading when I wasn't eating.

Ned Raggett, Saturday, 24 November 2001 01:00 (eighteen years ago) link

two years pass...
now watching: clay aiken singing "silver bells"

bad jode (Jody Beth Rosen), Thursday, 27 November 2003 16:48 (sixteen years ago) link

"christmas is in the air... my inner child tells me so." -katie couric, just now

bad jode (Jody Beth Rosen), Thursday, 27 November 2003 16:52 (sixteen years ago) link

Why aren't you down there at the TV camera site killing them?

Ned Raggett (Ned), Thursday, 27 November 2003 16:53 (sixteen years ago) link

*polishes gun*

bad jode (Jody Beth Rosen), Thursday, 27 November 2003 16:58 (sixteen years ago) link

I am very much digging the attempt to make the dog show a part of Thanksgiving TV tradition.

Eric H. (Eric H.), Thursday, 27 November 2003 18:16 (sixteen years ago) link

It's like America...on LSD!

@d@ml (nordicskilla), Thursday, 27 November 2003 18:19 (sixteen years ago) link

haha killing people is FUNNY

amateur!st (amateurist), Thursday, 27 November 2003 18:26 (sixteen years ago) link

i was at the rose parade once and remember being bored out of my skull, incidentally...is the macy's thing similar?

amateur!st (amateurist), Thursday, 27 November 2003 18:29 (sixteen years ago) link

this one has harvey fierstein dressed as his character in Hairspray the Musical, who is in turn dressed up as Mrs Claus!!

Tracer Hand (tracerhand), Thursday, 27 November 2003 19:05 (sixteen years ago) link

haha killing people is FUNNY

And great entertainment value!

Ned Raggett (Ned), Thursday, 27 November 2003 19:14 (sixteen years ago) link

You know, I just found out three years ago about the Fiesta sniper incident from local recent history. Who's the Fiesta sniper, you ask?

Two women were killed, six police officers were shot and about 50 bystanders were injured April 27, 1979, when Ira Attebery went on a shooting rampage about a half-hour before the scheduled start of the Battle of Flowers Parade. Attebery's recreational vehicle was parked at a tire company at Broadway and East Grayson Street, the parade's starting point. He emerged from the vehicle shooting, ducked back inside and eventually shot himself to death. The Battle of Flowers was canceled that year.

Tenacious Dee (Dee the Lurker), Thursday, 27 November 2003 21:32 (sixteen years ago) link

Oh yeah, and I love dog shows, but I've got my TV set to HGTV at present, out of pure laziness.

Tenacious Dee (Dee the Lurker), Thursday, 27 November 2003 21:33 (sixteen years ago) link

I watched a bit of the dog show. There was no Fred Willard, so I turned it off.

bad jode (Jody Beth Rosen), Thursday, 27 November 2003 21:43 (sixteen years ago) link

ten years pass...

Watching the parade now! Have seem Smurfettes, Spiderman, Joan Jett singing on a float, tons of boybands, Ariana Grande singing to Dora the Explorer...

curmudgeon, Thursday, 28 November 2013 16:53 (six years ago) link

Oh no, its over. There's drunk Santa. Dog show up next

curmudgeon, Thursday, 28 November 2013 17:01 (six years ago) link

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UQ92eyxnxmQ

markers, Thursday, 28 November 2013 17:11 (six years ago) link

A marching band played the Amboy Dukes' "Journey To The Center Of The Mind." Adding insult to injury, Matt Lauer said the song was originally done by "the Asbury Dukes." Thanksgiving is ruined.

Montgomery Burns' Jazz (Tarfumes The Escape Goat), Thursday, 28 November 2013 17:25 (six years ago) link

part of me hoping for a balloon to snap it's moorings in the high winds

set the controls for the heart of the sun (VegemiteGrrl), Thursday, 28 November 2013 18:26 (six years ago) link

Hear about this on the radio on the way to my folks. It was followed by a really short human-interest story about people wishing stores would close on Thanksgiving so workers could be w their families. Then the DJ listed all of the stores that were staying open, which was more or less all the stores w huge floats in the parade.

Emperor Cos Dashit (Adam Bruneau), Friday, 29 November 2013 01:59 (six years ago) link

I believe in being a "gamer" about it. In the USA, XMas is part of an ongoing religious war in which everything that is godless and unholy about capitalism teams up with humorless religious forces to overwhelm us with crappy holiday sentiment. In my family we believe in toughing it out for the sake of not losing our stake in this dispute.

I always enjoyed the parade for its unintentional (?) humor. People dancing in animal costumes, giant hot air stuffed animals, a peek at what's on Broadway....

Also it was worth it to see Dora the Explorer attempt to funk out. Meanwhile, the Motown dancers were horrid - have they never watched The Temps? Or maybe it was too cold. Also a couple of the dancers slipped and nearly fell.

It seemed though that the participants had good humor about it. And marching bands are cool. Go Spartans!!!

Sweetfrosti (I M Losted), Friday, 29 November 2013 03:05 (six years ago) link


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