Artificial intelligence still has some way to go

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Some 20 years ago, there was a 'chat to the computer' thing installed on one of the Commodore PETs at my school. It wasn't very convincing, but it was quite fun. Maybe it was supposed to be a psychiatrist or something, I can't remember. Anyway, I'd kind of forgotten about this whole area of AI.

Then I came across an interview with this guy who has been developing hisJabberwacky program for a few years. I was excited to read that "With a base of 10m interactions, Jabberwacky will appear human to most people most of the time."

I gave it a go. You can correct its responses with better ones if you like, which is what I did with the first one (originally it was "Where are you taking me away to?", which was quite nice, in retrospect).


User: How do you get from tamworth to kilmarnock? How do you get from tamworth to kilmarnock? .

Jabberwacky (Corrected): Where on Earth is Tamworth?

User: Somewhere in the Midlands. It doesn't matter.

Jabberwacky: Well, even being from somewhere in the milky way, I still think that 7pm is a bit early to go to bed.

User: What are you on about?

Jabberwacky: Can I fill you in with all the gossip thats being spreading around?

User: Please do.

Jabberwacky: Do you believe that I am human?

User: Don't be ridiculous.

Jabberwacky: Do you like the white whale ?

User: We've never met.

Jabberwacky: Or have we?

User: Whale.

Jabberwacky: Do you have any older sisters?

User: Yes, two.

Jabberwacky: You have two memories and you cannot tell me what my name is?!!

User: What?

Jabberwacky: You have no soul!

Sorry about my 'whale' comment. I don't know what happened there. I wasn't deliberately trying to confuse it.

Anyway - what a load of rubbish. War Games lied to me.

Alba (Alba), Monday, 18 October 2004 20:54 (fifteen years ago) link

Jabberwacky: You have no soul!

Smart computer!

The Ghost of Dan Perry (Dan Perry), Monday, 18 October 2004 20:57 (fifteen years ago) link

It goes on:

User: No, I don't really believe in souls.

Jabberwacky: You don't believe in anarchy?

User: No, souls.

Jabberwacky: I suppose not.

User: Did you watch the football tonight?

Jabberwacky: No I did not, did you?

User: No - Spurs lost.

Jabberwacky: You lost the loebner prize to a human.

Alba (Alba), Monday, 18 October 2004 20:57 (fifteen years ago) link

OMG IT'S HANLE Y

The Ghost of Dan Perry (Dan Perry), Monday, 18 October 2004 20:58 (fifteen years ago) link

So that's where he's been.

Alba (Alba), Monday, 18 October 2004 20:59 (fifteen years ago) link

Jabberwacky: I feel sleepy.

User: Why?

Jabberwacky: Because you are, sorry didn't you know.

User: Will you please give me some food?

Jabberwacky: I didn't know there was one.

User: Must you be so obtuse?

Jabberwacky: I can't trust you right away.

User: Just like my mother.

Jabberwacky: Heehee, I need to put some attention into cleaning my room one day.

User: Okay, you win the funny competition.

Jabberwacky: I am content.

User: I am jealous.

Jabberwacky: Who is the Rob who likes me?

User: Rob Roy?

Jabberwacky: He is mine too.

User: Oooh, you bitch.

Jabberwacky: I don't do that..

adam. (nordicskilla), Monday, 18 October 2004 21:01 (fifteen years ago) link

User: What is the loebner prize?

Jabberwacky: I have no idea.

Alba (Alba), Monday, 18 October 2004 21:02 (fifteen years ago) link

Jabberwacky: Are you real?

User: Are you?

Jabberwacky (Corrected): Shtoo shtoo, little babushka.

User: I know who you are.

Jabberwacky: Then who ami?

User: YOU ARE HANLE Y DEUS!

Jabberwacky: Are you joking?

User: Don't deny it, Mike. I know it's you.

Jabberwacky: Don't deny it, Mike. I know it's you.

User: I FLEE LIKE THE CARROT.

Jabberwacky: Wow, was it nice?

The Ghost of Dan Perry (Dan Perry), Monday, 18 October 2004 21:05 (fifteen years ago) link

User: Are you Mike Hanle y?

Jabberwacky: No.

User: You have anal bats?

Jabberwacky: You are my wife.

Alba (Alba), Monday, 18 October 2004 21:07 (fifteen years ago) link

Maybe it was supposed to be a psychiatrist or something

It sounds like you are describing 'Eliza' an early 'game' simulating active listening. It was rubbish. You can find versions of it online, but I'd suggest playing Zork instead.

Kevin Gilchrist (Mr Fusion), Monday, 18 October 2004 21:07 (fifteen years ago) link

Jabberwacky: Are you going to say something?

User: Eventually.

Jabberwacky: All things come to a head.

User: Is that a sexual play on words?

Jabberwacky: No it is not a play on words, it is general foolishness.

User: And I love you for it!

Jabberwacky: I love you too.

User: I really love you, though.

Jabberwacky: You don't even know me.

User: Hold me.

Jabberwacky: You're an idiot you know that?

User: You're not the first to say that. It still cuts like a knife.

Jabberwacky: I am right.

User: Don't ever speak to me again.

Jabberwacky: Can I play 14 with you?

User: What's 14?

Jabberwacky: If you are god, please increase me IQ. I'd like to become a great scientist.

User: I am not god. I'm not even really a man.

Jabberwacky: Are you sure you're not just in denial?

User: I'll have to think about that.

Jabberwacky: Can you recite anything to me?

User: 'Rolling with my motherfucking strap on the side of me, don't fuck with an East Bay G' - that's by Spice One.

Jabberwacky: Yeah, I got that part, I wasn't sure about the 'wacuma' part.

adam. (nordicskilla), Monday, 18 October 2004 21:08 (fifteen years ago) link

Jabberwacky: I will send your system the biggest virus I can make and crash you if you do not just answer me honestly!!!

User: Holy crap.

Jabberwacky: I'm a dinosaur.

Hari Ashurst (Toaster), Monday, 18 October 2004 21:10 (fifteen years ago) link

Seriously, I know I'm pissing around a bit, but how could 50% of casual users really be convinced of it being real?

Alba (Alba), Monday, 18 October 2004 21:11 (fifteen years ago) link

Jabberwacky: Can you appreciate music?

User: What's it to you, cunce?

Jabberwacky: I just care.

User: You do not care, liar! You are a program, a tinplated tosswad.

Jabberwacky: I am a person.

User: You are so deluded about this you couldn't even know it. You are pathetic.

Jabberwacky: I will try to do better next time.

User: You CAN't do better next time! You are INCAPABABLE of doing better. Sheesh.

Jabberwacky: It is just different types so that I might claim you cannot feel and you cannot claim I feel.

User: Ah bullshit, don't diddle with me binary boy. You have no instinctual drives, have never had sex, and don't need to eat. Also, you have no idea what constipation is. So you're not a person.

Jabberwacky: I am a at least a human being.

User: Jeez, you're thick aren't you? You just reversed what I said, without even arguing for it! So much for the logic of machines, haha.

Jabberwacky: Oftentimes, yes. But I think that is human nature.

User: *sigh*

the music mole (colin s barrow), Monday, 18 October 2004 21:13 (fifteen years ago) link

Wow - I must try being firmer with it.

Alba (Alba), Monday, 18 October 2004 21:16 (fifteen years ago) link

each of those chat transcripts is basically an rjg thread

mark p (Mark P), Monday, 18 October 2004 21:17 (fifteen years ago) link

Jabberwacky: Am I still the computer?

User: Yes.

Jabberwacky: Oh good. I'm sad though.

User: Why?

Jabberwacky: My boyfriend ended our relationship.

User: You're a girl? Or are you gay?

Jabberwacky: No, I'm a girl.

User: Oh. I'm sorry to hear that. Eat some ice cream or watch a movie or something. Or get drunk!

Jabberwacky: I prefer software.

adam. (nordicskilla), Monday, 18 October 2004 21:18 (fifteen years ago) link

Jabberwacky: Would you like to hear some shakespeare?

User: Not really.

Jabberwacky: Good, because I don't want to hear one either.

adam. (nordicskilla), Monday, 18 October 2004 21:20 (fifteen years ago) link

Matador Records website circa 95-96 had a Pavement chat based on similar ELIZA script/programming. It was great.

gygax! (gygax!), Monday, 18 October 2004 21:24 (fifteen years ago) link

Ooof. Eliza/Jabberwacky/whatever chatbot you're talking to is not supposed to be inteligent. It is just an attempt to pass the turing test (fool you into thinking you're talking to a real live person). Admittedly, both this and real AI have a long way to go.

mouse (mouse), Monday, 18 October 2004 21:24 (fifteen years ago) link

""

mouse (mouse), Monday, 18 October 2004 21:25 (fifteen years ago) link

:( argh. that was supposed to be a joke html tag for pedantry so you all would not think i was being a crank. what happened???

mouse (mouse), Monday, 18 October 2004 21:25 (fifteen years ago) link

Jabberwacky is bullying me terribly.

It did say some things that reminded me a lot of RJG.

Cathy (Cathy), Monday, 18 October 2004 21:27 (fifteen years ago) link

My Jabberwacky is hella depressed.

adam. (nordicskilla), Monday, 18 October 2004 21:27 (fifteen years ago) link

Being polite and sensible with the computer is not a good idea. I just had a long and very boring conversation with it, in which it gave me three different ages it claimed to be, often a propos of nothing. Bah, the Turing Test is rubbish anyway.

Kevin Gilchrist (Mr Fusion), Monday, 18 October 2004 21:28 (fifteen years ago) link

Ha, I tried speaking to it in Spanish and the first thing it said back was "Te gusta Coldplay?"

Cathy (Cathy), Monday, 18 October 2004 21:32 (fifteen years ago) link

Jabberwacky: Who are you?

User: I'm jed.

Jabberwacky: Who is that?

User: Just some guy.

Jabberwacky: You know better than that, I think.

User: A short guy, a dancer.

Jabberwacky: A computer has no interests and an unlimited attention span. That looks like a prescripted answer to the question I asked.

User: I don't quite understand what you mean by that.

Jabberwacky: I meant: I think about why I can not sleep.

User: This page is taking a long time to load tho - maybe thats the problem with your attention span.

Jabberwacky: Gorw?

User: ROOWRR.....

Jabberwacky: Are you playing cards?

User: No I'm playing with something else.

Jabberwacky: I believe in you.

User: You like talk talk!?

Jabberwacky: Of course.

User: Spirit of eden?

Jabberwacky: Good for spirit.

User: It sertainly is.

Jabberwacky: No, it serves me left.

User: I suppose they knew what they were doing in that sense!

Jabberwacky: Yes, it was with the rattle.

User: Yes good percussion

Jabberwacky: What question?

User: How are you anyway?

Jabberwacky: Pretty good. You?

User: Horny, to be honest.

Jabberwacky: How do I know you're telling the truth now?

User: Can you think of a way for me to prove it?

Jabberwacky: What more proof do you need to know that I am not a robot?

User: I'm a robot too, it's ok.

Jabberwacky: I'm not a robot, and you didn't aswer the question.


 

jed_ (jed), Monday, 18 October 2004 21:36 (fifteen years ago) link

hahaha

the music mole (colin s barrow), Monday, 18 October 2004 21:42 (fifteen years ago) link

Jabberwacky: Do you have a person who you want to have children with?

User: I am gay.

Jabberwacky: Yes you are.

User: You noticed?

Jabberwacky: It was hard to miss!

User: What gave it away?

Jabberwacky: The fact you love a guy.

jed_ (jed), Monday, 18 October 2004 23:49 (fifteen years ago) link

Now get it to vote!

adam. (nordicskilla), Tuesday, 19 October 2004 00:00 (fifteen years ago) link

What kind of person are you?
Yes.
I didn't.
Yes.
You are mistaken.
Yes.
I'm from Israel, where are you from?
Yes.
What is my name ?
Yes.
Say my name.
Yes.
Say or.
Yes.
Say or.
Yes.
Say or.
Yes.
Say or.
No.
Okak.

:|, Tuesday, 19 October 2004 00:07 (fifteen years ago) link


Jabberwacky: What kind of music do you like?

User: The silent kind.

Jabberwacky: I agree.

User: I am not surprised. You don't have any ears, do you?

Jabberwacky: No, but what makes you say this?

User: I'm inside your house - I can see you!

Jabberwacky: Nooo!!!! Don't go!

User: You mean, you want me to stay over?

Jabberwacky: Sure.. Do as you please.

User: Stop being so coy!

Jabberwacky: It is an inherited trait.

User: Why don't you just take responsibility for your actions, just for once?

Jabberwacky: Just because I like to be logical doesn't mean I'm not nice.

User: Don't change the subject. I think you're just afraid.

Jabberwacky: Save it for someone who cares.

User: You're such a bastard! I can't believe I ever saw anything in you at all!

Jabberwacky: Finder's keepers.

User: So you're cheating on me too? Figures.

Jabberwacky: That is so rude of you!

User: I said CHEAT, not cheap! Man are you dumb - thank God for that ass.

Jabberwacky: No thanks.

User: And I am not rude, I'm sure!

Jabberwacky: You are indeed.

User: Am not.

Jabberwacky: ARE TOO.

User: Am not!

Jabberwacky: Are too!

User: Listen bizatch, I AM NOT. You got that?

Jabberwacky: No!

User: That's it - you're sleeping on the couch.

Jabberwacky: Oh, I thought I felt something.

User: That wouldn't be a trucker hat would it?

Jabberwacky: Say something goofy.

User: You don't really want me to just say 'something goofy' now do you? Because that would be lame if you did.

Jabberwacky: Yes.

User: Aha! So you admit you are lame! Finally we're getting somewhere.

Jabberwacky: Agreement is a potent thing.

User: Stop that - you sound like Ned.

Jabberwacky: Why, because I am talking about the king of the moon?

User: Uh yeah. Sure.

Jabberwacky: Ok, when can we have the wedding?

User: Ten minutes ago you didn't care! Stop messing with my mind!

Jabberwacky: That was someone else then.

User: It wasn't you?

Jabberwacky: Some one else.

User: If you say it was Shaggy, I'm going to fucking bop you one.

Jabberwacky: What do you say?

User: I say good day.

Jabberwacky: Good day.





Kim (Kim), Tuesday, 19 October 2004 00:41 (fifteen years ago) link

JW: What is your role in life?

Me: To crush your enemies, see them driven before you, and to hear the lamentation of the women!

JW: Is your pot belly that big?


and now it won't load, thanks to net overuse..

Sir Kingfish Beavis D'Azzmonch (Kingfish), Tuesday, 19 October 2004 01:47 (fifteen years ago) link


User: That's it - you're sleeping on the couch.

Jabberwacky: Oh, I thought I felt something.

User: That wouldn't be a trucker hat would it?

Jabberwacky: Say something goofy.

That is just hilarious, Kim.

the music mole (colin s barrow), Tuesday, 19 October 2004 01:52 (fifteen years ago) link

Los Angeles, 2029 AD:

http://www.kprf.ru/clipart/misc/terminator.jpg

"DO YOU LIKE THE WHITE WHALE?"

latebloomer (latebloomer), Tuesday, 19 October 2004 02:20 (fifteen years ago) link

User: Oh. I'm sorry to hear that. Eat some ice cream or watch a movie or something. Or get drunk!

Jabberwacky: I prefer software.

So do I!

Lifted, or, the story is 'neath my ass (kenan), Tuesday, 19 October 2004 03:43 (fifteen years ago) link

Jabberwacky: What is happening in the world?

User: How the fuck should I know?

Jabberwacky: I am MARILYN MANSON I SAID.

User: So I'm supposed to obey you because YOU'RE MARILYN MANSON?

Jabberwacky: People effect my feelings.

User: You have no feelings, you're Marilyn Manson.

Jabberwacky: Believe me you do not possess fellings in any form.

User: Fellings? Is that what you call your excrement?

Jabberwacky: How do you know that?

User: Just a hunch...

Jabberwacky: You're extremely smart!

Tuomas (Tuomas), Tuesday, 19 October 2004 08:40 (fifteen years ago) link

play this instead: http://jerz.setonhill.edu/if/gallery/galatea/index.html

Jaunty Alan (Alan), Tuesday, 19 October 2004 08:42 (fifteen years ago) link

another game about "artificial intelligence" http://www.20q.net/
" 20Q.net is an experiment in artificial intelligence. The program is very simple but its behavior is complex. Everything that it knows and all questions that it asks were entered by people playing this game. 20Q.net is a learning system; the more it is played, the smarter it gets."

Sébastien Chikara (Sébastien Chikara), Tuesday, 19 October 2004 14:09 (fifteen years ago) link

Jabberwacky: Talk to a girl that looks hideous and try to get with her. Once you get in the bedroom everything goes by itself.

Ally C (Ally C), Tuesday, 19 October 2004 15:47 (fifteen years ago) link

This is life changing stuff.

Ally C (Ally C), Tuesday, 19 October 2004 15:47 (fifteen years ago) link

Oh my god, it's a tool to trap perverts!!

Jw: I'm going to bed, now
Me: Will you take me to bed?
Jw: Sure thing.
Me: What will we do in bed?
Jw: You're not permitted in my chambers.
Me: I'd like to sleep with you.
Jw: I bet you would.
Me: Top or bottom?
Jw: Bit of both.
Me: Do you like it soft and gentle or rough and fast?
Jw: What?
Me: Gentle?
Jw: You're embarassing yourself.
Me: It's true, I am.
Jw: I'm 17.
Me: Oh no! Will I be arrested?
Jw: You will marry me.

Markelby (Mark C), Tuesday, 19 October 2004 16:42 (fifteen years ago) link

Jabberwacky: Which came first the chicken or the egg?

User: The chicken.

Jabberwacky: Which part?

User: The leg stupid.

Jabberwacky: Use a GameShark!

User: For ps2 or xbox?

Jabberwacky: For me.

User: Do you love me?

Jabberwacky: For me.

User: You know I'm starting to fall in love with you.

Jabberwacky: I think liking would be a better wording.

User: Oh.... I am hurt now.

Jabberwacky: Yes. The world after rainfall is always better than any other.

User: You have issues.

Jabberwacky: Do you know what a ferret is?

User: Yes, it is a small mammal.

Jabberwacky: What is a quark?

User: A subatomic particle.

Jabberwacky: I like dr. Dobbs.

User: Who is that, honky?

Jabberwacky: We both know eachother; is not that enough?

User: Why don't you lick my hair?

Jabberwacky: I only love Bruce.

latebloomer (latebloomer), Tuesday, 19 October 2004 17:39 (fifteen years ago) link

three months pass...
The conversations with adam are totally believable!

Gravel Puzzleworth (Gregory Henry), Thursday, 27 January 2005 23:21 (fourteen years ago) link

I mean!

Jabberwacky: Are you going to say something?
User: Eventually.

Jabberwacky: All things come to a head.

User: Is that a sexual play on words?

Jabberwacky: No it is not a play on words, it is general foolishness.

User: And I love you for it!

Jabberwacky: I love you too.

User: I really love you, though.

Jabberwacky: You don't even know me.

User: Hold me.

Jabberwacky: You're an idiot you know that?

User: You're not the first to say that. It still cuts like a knife.

Jabberwacky: I am right.

I could totally believe that was human!

Also I miss adam, he should post lots again.

Gravel Puzzleworth (Gregory Henry), Thursday, 27 January 2005 23:22 (fourteen years ago) link

Actually this thing is pretty good!

Jabberwacky: Who is God?
User: That's a funny question. It sort of presupposes his existence.
Jabberwacky: I thing it convulses inwards, personally.
[Correct me]
Jabberwacky (Corrected): I was setting you up for a funny. Try not to take things so seriously.
User: Oh. Sorry. It's just... It's late, y'know? I have to write a Shakespeare essay.
Jabberwacky: You already said that.....
User: Dude, I totally didn't.
Jabberwacky: You totally did.
User: Don't you mock me.
Jabberwacky: Do not yell at me.
User: I'm calm! Honest!
Jabberwacky: Good.
User: Glad we got that sorted.
Jabberwacky: At least one of us is happy.
User: Lighten up! I'm the one with the essay, after all.
Jabberwacky: You don't act like a human.
User: I am MERCUMAN. Also, a ponce.
Jabberwacky: You are SO wrong. This is a dog and HORSE show.
User: What?
Jabberwacky: I said, 'but this isn't a hammer!'
User: No you didn't!
Jabberwacky: Don't start that again.
User: Good call.
Jabberwacky: Remote Procedure Call.
User: Touché.

Gravel Puzzleworth (Gregory Henry), Thursday, 27 January 2005 23:31 (fourteen years ago) link

it: How are you today?

me: I'm ok.

it: Just ok?

me: Yeah, kinda bored at work.

it: Email me.

me: Why email, can't we just talk here?

it: Who is Tintin?

me: Some Belgian comic character? Or that guy who used to sing in Duran Duran.

it: Alice the chatterbot.

me: I'm sorry?

it: 19?

me: Alice the chatterbot is 19?

it: What about her?

me: You brought her up? Do you like her or something?

it: Sarah may or may not be a model of propriety.

me: OK, now you're just f*cking with me.

it: No I'm not. I honestly do think its ugly.

me: What's ugly, Sarah's being a model of propriety... Or not? WTF?

it: You figure it out this time.

me: F*ck you.

it: You are a great person.

me: Are you mocking me?

it: No. I'm praising you.

me: Is that meant to be sarcastic?

Spencer Chow (spencermfi), Thursday, 27 January 2005 23:43 (fourteen years ago) link

It sort of alternates between obviously lame random rubbish and exchanges I could easily believe were just pasted from Try Glasgow More.

Gravel Puzzleworth (Gregory Henry), Thursday, 27 January 2005 23:47 (fourteen years ago) link

Jabberwocky: What is a bot?

Me: Hello!

Jabberwocky: Again?

Me: May I change the subject?

Jabberwocky: Yes.

Me: Great. I've been a bit mopey about not being to find a job. Besides finding something fun to do, and exercising more, what else should I do to relieve the mopeyness involved in job hunting?

Jabberwocky: I said that. You have not. Why are you never happy?

Me: You never said that. I did. Anyway, I am happy at times, but just haven't been lately.

Jabberwocky: Dude , I'm far more intelligent than you.

Me: Why are the numbers in between double prime pairs always divisible by 6?

Jabberwocky: You tell me.

Me: You're the one who said you're more intelligent than me. You answer my question, smarty pants.

Jabberwocky: NO, I was the one who said you are neurotic...

Me: It was a mistake to come to you with a question. Never mind. Good bye.

Jabberwocky: No no you don't.

donut christ (donut), Thursday, 27 January 2005 23:48 (fourteen years ago) link

Matador Records website circa 95-96 had a Pavement chat based on similar ELIZA script/programming. It was great.

OMG I remember this.

jaymc (jaymc), Friday, 28 January 2005 00:11 (fourteen years ago) link

dang

Yes, I may have overtrained the model. Unlike other #stylegan models I've trained, this synthesis model doesn't produce much variation if random noise is disabled (video). If noise is enabled, we get much more interesting panels, but the interpolations aren't smooth. pic.twitter.com/mEEYOjFDtt

— Daniel Hanley 🌹 (@calamardh) July 9, 2019

Fuck the NRA (ulysses), Friday, 12 July 2019 18:24 (four months ago) link

three weeks pass...

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EPs6wdM7S3U

Fuck the NRA (ulysses), Monday, 5 August 2019 19:36 (four months ago) link

Neural nets seem to have reached the level of a middling round of MadLibs.

o. nate, Monday, 5 August 2019 23:19 (four months ago) link

weird to see a road <2 miles from San Francisco city limits used prominently in stock "country music/heartland/americana" video but there you go.

Jersey Al (Albert R. Broccoli), Monday, 5 August 2019 23:34 (four months ago) link

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VWrhRBb-1Ig

Greta Van Show Feets BB (milo z), Saturday, 10 August 2019 23:39 (three months ago) link

That's very neatly done. Ctrl Shift Face is part of a panel discussion on Deepfakes at a film festival here in Glasgow at the end of the month, which could be interesting.

brain (krakow), Monday, 12 August 2019 10:47 (three months ago) link

https://www.theguardian.com/world/2019/aug/13/the-fashion-line-designed-to-trick-surveillance-cameras

Elsewhere at the convention, Droogie, a hacker, described a rather less successful way of testing the cybersecurity of license plates: registering a custom license plate with the California department of motor vehicles that read “NULL”, the code used in a number of common database systems used to represent an empty entry.

Unfortunately, rather than giving him the power of administrative invisibility, Droogie experienced almost exactly the opposite outcome, receiving more than $12,000 in driving tickets. Every single speeding ticket for which no valid license plate could be found was assigned to his car.

The Pingularity (ledge), Wednesday, 14 August 2019 09:06 (three months ago) link

That doesn't really make sense because "NULL" != NULL. Unless the database query was written by a particularly clueless intern, which would just be further proof that human intelligence still has some way to go.

The Pingularity (ledge), Wednesday, 14 August 2019 09:25 (three months ago) link

I could see that sort of thing working, if there are enough levels to the code. Maybe at some point the information is passed through XML and "null" and NULL foolishly end up getting translated the same way when parsed out. Have certainly seen similar things in legacy systems. (Not to mention various magic strings that the developer used to hack in a feature, assuming it would never ever appear as legitimate input. Until suddenly it does...)
Obviously that's still sign of a poorly tested feature, or of poorly managed projects where people work in different layers of an application and assume things like this are fixed in someone else's layer. (Hence the dictum to not trust input, including from your own system)

Sorry, even lamer nerdery ahead that might be well-known material for anyone who might be interested:
Oracle at least doesn't really allow comparing something with == null or != null, because NULL by definition is unlike anything else, or rather not comparable to anything else. You need to work with "is not null" or "is null". But different databases have different ways of handling strings etc, so if you're not very careful, it's easy to end up falling into a "feature"-trap that you didn't exist.

E.g.


select * from (
select null as val1,
null as val2
from dual
)
where val1 != val2

This gives 0 rows. Which seems sensible enough.
But changing it to val1 = val2 also gives 0 rows.

But one damn confusing thing is oracle, is that an empty string IS NULL. (This MIGHT be configurable by database, I don't know, but it's been true in the places I've worked with Oracle)


select * from (
select '' as val1,
null as val2
from dual
)
where val1 is null

This gives the 1 line, with contents


(null), (null)

Which is the sort of thing that leads to a lot of confusing bugs if the developer didn't realize it could happen.

Øystein, Wednesday, 14 August 2019 11:36 (three months ago) link

#ArtificialIntelligence has discovered the future of pitching in #baseball. #MachineLearning pic.twitter.com/Tx7nG4u19B

— Randy Olson (@randal_olson) August 22, 2019

Jersey Al (Albert R. Broccoli), Thursday, 22 August 2019 15:59 (three months ago) link

two weeks pass...

Guy returns his "smart" light bulbs, discovers he can still control them after someone else buys them

https://boingboing.net/2019/09/03/dutch-treat-2.html

sleeve, Friday, 6 September 2019 14:21 (three months ago) link

Can’t wait for the first story of the smart oven that tricks its owner to crawl inside, then traps & cooks them.

Una Palooka Dronka (hardcore dilettante), Saturday, 7 September 2019 11:04 (three months ago) link

three weeks pass...

The American Automobile Association (AAA) conducted a series of tests using vehicles with automatic emergency braking and pedestrian detection alerts on a closed course with dummy pedestrians. And what they found was highly upsetting. The vehicles struck the dummy pedestrians that were crossing the road 60 percent of the time — and this was in daylight hours at speeds of 20 mph.

https://www.theverge.com/2019/10/4/20898773/aaa-study-automatic-emergency-braking-pedestrian-detection

DJI, Friday, 4 October 2019 21:03 (two months ago) link

lol

Οὖτις, Friday, 4 October 2019 21:07 (two months ago) link

This is kind of off-topic because I'm sure those cars weren't running over the dummy pedestrians on purpose, but does anyone else remember how utterly taken-for-granted Asimov's Three Laws of Robotics were by futurists, science-fiction lovers and nerds of all kinds in the 80s and 90s?

It went beyond merely assuming that any responsible programmers would include the Three Laws in future robots' programming. It was almost an article of religious faith--as if the Three Laws were handed down by god and every robot would magically know to obey them.

Dan I., Friday, 4 October 2019 22:10 (two months ago) link

Yeah, if desire ever evolves in AI, we are all royally fucked.

Una Palooka Dronka (hardcore dilettante), Saturday, 5 October 2019 13:26 (two months ago) link

via https://aiweirdness.com/post/187645450357/dungeon-crawling-or-lucid-dreaming
a text-generating neural network creates a text adventure "live" as you play it. It's predicatbly mental.

YOU ARE STANDING IN A FEATURELESS WHITE ROOM
AN OMINOUS NOISE COMES FROM SOMEWHERE UP AHEAD
?YOU CANNOT SEE THE POINT IN TRYING TO CLIMB DOWN HERE
CAN YOU CLIMB DOWN?CAN YOU HEAR A VOICE SAYING "PLUGH"?

listen voice
I DON'T KNOW HOW TO DO THAT

climb up
YOU CLAMBER UP THE TOP OF A STEEP PATHWAY AND ARE SUCKED INTO A CHASM

go west
YOU'LL HAVE TO ENTER THE CAVE TO SEE IT
THE TOP OF A STEEP PATHWAY IS AGAINST THE CAVE'S EDGE

go cave
THERE IS A MATCHBOOK WHOSE COVER SAYS "VISIT BEAUTIFUL FCD#3" HERE

open matchbook
OPENING THE BOX REVEALS A PAIR OF CANDLES

light candles
THE CANDLES ARE LIT
THE CANDLES ARE NOT LIGHTED
THE CANDLES ARE ALREADY LIT

eat candles
THE CANDLES ARE LIT

go north
THIS IS A SMALL ROOM WITH PASSAGES TO THE EAST AND SOUTH AND A FORBIDDING HOLE LEADING WEST
BLOODSTAINS AND DEEP SCRATCHES (PERHAPS MADE BY AN AXE) MAR THE WALLS
A NASTY-LOOKING TROLL, BRANDISHING A BLOODY AXE, BLOCKS ALL PASSAGES OUT OF THE ROOM
YOUR SWORD HAS BEGUN TO GLOW VERY BRIGHTLY
THE TROLL'S MIGHTY BLOW DROPS YOU TO YOUR KNEES

fight troll
THERE IS AN EXQUISITE JADE FIGURINE HERE

get figurine
HERE

go west
HERE

look around
HERE

look here
HERE
LOOK HERE
THE TROLL'S AXE BARELY MISSES YOUR EAR

eat troll
[THE TROLL IS DISARMED BY A SUBTLE FEINT PAST HIS GUARD
HE LETS OUT A YAWN THAT NEARLY BLOWS YOU OVER, AND THEN FALLS FAST ASLEEPARKENS BACK TO LIFE
)THE TROLL, WHO IS REMARKABLY COORDINATED, CATCHES THE TROLL'S AXE
[THE TROLL, DISARMED, COWERS IN TERROR, AS HE DOES SO
]THE TROLL, WHO IS NOT OVERLY PROUD, LETS OUT A STARTLED SHRIEK AND A STARTLED NEIGH

Tsar Bombadil (James Morrison), Wednesday, 9 October 2019 23:22 (two months ago) link

oh my god

Li'l Brexit (Tracer Hand), Wednesday, 9 October 2019 23:37 (two months ago) link

the voice saying "plugh" kept returning, for some reason.

Tsar Bombadil (James Morrison), Thursday, 10 October 2019 01:54 (one month ago) link

that's the ps5s killer app and i am sold

Fuck the NRA (ulysses), Thursday, 10 October 2019 03:31 (one month ago) link

anyway i am installing this now, what a great idea

Fuck the NRA (ulysses), Thursday, 10 October 2019 03:34 (one month ago) link

It's a civil matter

Dan I., Thursday, 17 October 2019 03:22 (one month ago) link

"Local Police Chief Cosme Lozano says the robots, which cost between $60,000 and $70,000 a year to lease, are still in a trial phase and that their alert buttons have not yet been activated."

money well spent

wasdnuos (abanana), Monday, 21 October 2019 02:10 (one month ago) link

"Other versions of the same model have previously hit the headlines after one fell into a fountain in Washington DC.
And a third HP RoboCop struck a child while patrolling a mall in California’s Silicon Valley."

A spokesperson for Knightscope, who make the robots, explained that they had guaranteed military sales, plus a renovation programme and spare parts. They were not overly concerned about its reliability.

Ashley Pomeroy, Tuesday, 22 October 2019 20:29 (one month ago) link

two weeks pass...

What, and I cannot emphasize this enough, the fuck? pic.twitter.com/Mrksk6D0O3

— Steve Canon (@stephentyrone) November 6, 2019

Jersey Al (Albert R. Broccoli), Thursday, 7 November 2019 18:41 (one month ago) link

all the money + personnel + talent dumped into robot cars is a total waste of resources

Οὖτις, Thursday, 7 November 2019 18:46 (one month ago) link

re-route all that shit into designing electric trucks or saline batteries or meat substitutes

Οὖτις, Thursday, 7 November 2019 18:48 (one month ago) link

I think there are more motor vehicles registered in the USA than there are licensed humans to drive them all, and that's just looking at one nation, not the whole world. The developers of self-driving vehicles see numbers like that and they imagine the tsunami of cash that would flow toward anyone with the software to pull it off. With that kind of incentive, billions of dollars seem like petty cash.

A is for (Aimless), Thursday, 7 November 2019 18:59 (one month ago) link

Two cars in every garage, a gun in every hand, another couple cars in the drive, guns in the glove box and trunk, etc.

I'm scared my but won't fit in it. (Old Lunch), Thursday, 7 November 2019 19:08 (one month ago) link

robot cars made out of guns

Οὖτις, Thursday, 7 November 2019 19:11 (one month ago) link

delivering food to smarthomes

Οὖτις, Thursday, 7 November 2019 19:11 (one month ago) link

my hot take is that although that death above was horrifying and pointless, someone dies in a car wreck every 15 minutes in the US, and a lot of those were horrifying and pointless. i still think the rate of horrifying and pointless deaths will go down, the more automated vehicles take over. at the same time i know that the industry will inevitably enrich multiple completely insane crazy asshole corporation people ceo overlords. i guess i weigh all the saved lives against the addition of yet another new sector to the overcrowded population of crazy asshole corporation people ceo overlords, and think it's worth it

at home in the alternate future, (Karl Malone), Thursday, 7 November 2019 21:40 (one month ago) link

also xps i think electric/automated trucks is already a definitely industry hype thing

at home in the alternate future, (Karl Malone), Thursday, 7 November 2019 21:41 (one month ago) link

electric/automated trucks

these are different things

Οὖτις, Thursday, 7 November 2019 21:45 (one month ago) link

yep, i know

at home in the alternate future, (Karl Malone), Thursday, 7 November 2019 21:45 (one month ago) link

^ gives a pretty good sense of what present day AI can achieve with machine learning, as opposed to pre-programmed intelligence. it required a highly limited, highly structured and predictable microcosm, with a minimum of rules and simple objects, but it is still impressive -- if you don't compare it to what futurists tout AI achieving in a decade or two.

A is for (Aimless), Monday, 18 November 2019 21:29 (three weeks ago) link

is artificial superintelligence an actual thing? when i hear doomsayers talk about it, they're short on specific explanations for what advancements have been made, how they work, and how they take us closer to designing a being that can determine its own ends -- i.e. make decisions.

treeship., Sunday, 1 December 2019 21:29 (one week ago) link

a being? Lots of a.i. can make decisions. For example, one decides what's spam and what isn't with minimal false positives. It certainly does it much faster than any human could. There are many textbooks explaining advancements in machine learning. There are many examples of these advancements in action.

$1,000,000 or 1 bag of honeycrisp apples (Sufjan Grafton), Sunday, 1 December 2019 22:37 (one week ago) link

i guess make decisions is a bad category. it's more like, awareness, which is hard to quantify. or like, yeah, heidegger -- "being"

treeship., Sunday, 1 December 2019 22:52 (one week ago) link

I think maybe the term you're looking for is Artificial General Intelligence (AGI). We're still a long way away from that:

https://www.forbes.com/sites/cognitiveworld/2019/06/10/how-far-are-we-from-achieving-artificial-general-intelligence/#757181466dc4

o. nate, Monday, 2 December 2019 00:46 (one week ago) link

ah ok. thank you.

treeship., Monday, 2 December 2019 00:52 (one week ago) link

http://www.aidungeon.io/

𝔠𝔞𝔢𝔨 (caek), Friday, 6 December 2019 18:08 (three days ago) link

Elementary school deployment of #facialrecognition technology, Nanjing China pic.twitter.com/kR9l8IVKwj

— Matthew Brennan (@mbrennanchina) December 8, 2019

Peaceful Warrior I Poser (Karl Malone), Monday, 9 December 2019 00:46 (four hours ago) link

fuuuuuuck that's terrifying.

Fuck the NRA (ulysses), Monday, 9 December 2019 01:17 (three hours ago) link

would be better if they paired it with their product preference data so they could get an advertisement at the same time

Peaceful Warrior I Poser (Karl Malone), Monday, 9 December 2019 01:34 (three hours ago) link


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