GOTHIC ANUS

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A friend once said this about my ass.
I don't know what she meant.

Have you had or said creative or unusual insults?

― Hilarity Benn, Thursday, 13 May 2004 01:05 (nineteen years ago) link

I think the title of this thread just made my jaw lock open.

― kirsten (kirsten), Thursday, 13 May 2004 01:07 (nineteen years ago) link

I think your friend meant gargoyles and vampires were flying out of your but to the tune of "Third Uncle".

― VengaDan Perry (Dan Perry), Thursday, 13 May 2004 01:07 (nineteen years ago) link

Seriously, I still can't shut it.

― kirsten (kirsten), Thursday, 13 May 2004 01:08 (nineteen years ago) link

It's broken my brain trying to figure it out.
She could have been stoned.
She denies all knowledge.

― Hilarity Benn, Thursday, 13 May 2004 01:10 (nineteen years ago) link

maybe it's a bowel condition you get after too much absinthe

― the 'surface' 'noise' (electricsound), Thursday, 13 May 2004 01:11 (nineteen years ago) link

Anagrams for GOTHIC ANUS:

- INCH OUT GAS
- CHAIN GUSTO

― Autumn Almanac (Autumn Almanac), Thursday, 13 May 2004 01:15 (nineteen years ago) link

Look into my
Look into my
Deep inside my gothic anus
It shall expose the darkness and despair

Through the veil
My sphincter of malice
Moans and trembles in the pale moonlight
The dark-kinder play
In fields of blood
A wasteland expands from the colon of desire

Gaze into my
Gaze into my
Deep inside my gothic anus
Beams of terror emit forth

The afterlife beckons
From my twisted duodenum
Your heart is leaden
But a kiss will make the constriction explode
Another glance through a gauzy screen
And another demon is born

Submit to my
Bathe inside my
Deep inside my gothic anus

With a bowed head and aching back
The nubs of succubus wings
Giving pixeis the hump of ages
Winding through a small intestine
Dripping with ennui and angst
Your hatred suppository makes you strong

Gothic anus rules us all
Give over to the brownness

― Lord Vincent of Umbria (Dan Perry), Thursday, 13 May 2004 01:16 (nineteen years ago) link

Oh my god. I don't know if I have ever smiled this big before.

― kirsten (kirsten), Thursday, 13 May 2004 01:17 (nineteen years ago) link

sphincter of the undead

― Nate in ST.P (natedetritus), Thursday, 13 May 2004 01:18 (nineteen years ago) link

Give over to the brownies?

― weather1ngda1eson (Brian), Thursday, 13 May 2004 01:18 (nineteen years ago) link

One gothic anus to rule them all
One gothic anus to find them,
One gothic anus to bring them all and in the darkness bind them

― Autumn Almanac (Autumn Almanac), Thursday, 13 May 2004 01:19 (nineteen years ago) link

Kizz My Gothic Anus, coming soon from the reunited N.W.A

― Matos W.K. (M Matos), Thursday, 13 May 2004 01:21 (nineteen years ago) link

haha okay now people.

― Tracer Hand (tracerhand), Thursday, 13 May 2004 01:41 (nineteen years ago) link

gothse.cx

― Eisbär (llamasfur), Thursday, 13 May 2004 01:58 (nineteen years ago) link

Wait, Gothic Anus?
Wasn't this Cappadonna's
Wu-name for a while?

― Begs2Differ (Begs2Differ), Thursday, 13 May 2004 02:02 (nineteen years ago) link

Niggaz With Anii

― Nate in ST.P (natedetritus), Thursday, 13 May 2004 02:09 (nineteen years ago) link

Oh my God, Dan. Just oh my God/.

― J0hn Darn1elle (J0hn Darn1elle), Thursday, 13 May 2004 02:09 (nineteen years ago) link

Baby Turns Brown

― Trayce (trayce), Thursday, 13 May 2004 02:11 (nineteen years ago) link

Haha John do you need a co-lyricist for your next project?

― VengaDan Perry (Dan Perry), Thursday, 13 May 2004 02:18 (nineteen years ago) link

Perry-Darnielle Project, Flying Buttress

― J0hn Darn1elle (J0hn Darn1elle), Thursday, 13 May 2004 02:48 (nineteen years ago) link

somebody design us a logo, quick

― J0hn Darn1elle (J0hn Darn1elle), Thursday, 13 May 2004 02:48 (nineteen years ago) link

http://www.ilxlightwave.com/themes/generic/topLogo.jpg

No mention of gothic anuses, sadly.

― Autumn Almanac (Autumn Almanac), Thursday, 13 May 2004 02:51 (nineteen years ago) link

Bootyflakes fall like tears of lonely vampires

― Nate in ST.P (natedetritus), Thursday, 13 May 2004 02:57 (nineteen years ago) link

the lyrics of the first song of this perry/darnielle collab: how dan's friend earned his redwings!

― Eisbär (llamasfur), Thursday, 13 May 2004 02:59 (nineteen years ago) link

cold eyes of the vampire,
black wings of the bat;
cold gape of the aaaanus,
fuck washing a hat

Dave Matthews's anus
is non-goth through and through
I hate those that don't like him
shot all the people who do

― J0hn Darn1elle (J0hn Darn1elle), Thursday, 13 May 2004 03:23 (nineteen years ago) link

Few things are certain in this life, but I'm pretty sure I'm gonna regret that

― J0hn Darn1elle (J0hn Darn1elle), Thursday, 13 May 2004 03:23 (nineteen years ago) link

the perry/darnielle collaboration = dimmu borgir meets the outhere bros.

― Eisbär (llamasfur), Thursday, 13 May 2004 03:27 (nineteen years ago) link

aaaanus

i picture this being sung operatically

― the 'surface' 'noise' (electricsound), Thursday, 13 May 2004 03:36 (nineteen years ago) link

I'd like to see Phish get 20+ minutes from THAT.

― David R. (popshots75`), Thursday, 13 May 2004 04:13 (nineteen years ago) link

john you are a golden GOD

― stockholm cindy (Jody Beth Rosen), Thursday, 13 May 2004 04:31 (nineteen years ago) link

I'd like to see Phish get 20+ minutes from THAT.

yeah, they'd have to really stretch it out...

― Kingfish Disraeli (Kingfish), Thursday, 13 May 2004 04:32 (nineteen years ago) link

Okay, you have all successfully entertained, befuddled and terrified me -- all at once.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Thursday, 13 May 2004 04:44 (nineteen years ago) link

(google image search)

Your search - "gothic anus" - did not match any documents.

Suggestions:
- Make sure all words are spelled correctly.
- Try different keywords.
- Try more general keywords.
- Try fewer keywords.

PRAISE THE LORD.

― nickalicious (nickalicious), Thursday, 13 May 2004 12:50 (nineteen years ago) link

You have been hit by what is known as the GOTH BOOTY!! Check out Trash Scene's track dedicated to this (ie. "Goth Booty")

― Baaderoni (Fabfunk), Thursday, 13 May 2004 13:13 (nineteen years ago) link

Further research led me to this...

http://www.angelfire.com/electronic/gothicbootay

― Baaderoni (Fabfunk), Thursday, 13 May 2004 13:19 (nineteen years ago) link

http://www.angelfire.com/electronic/gothicbootay/esmerelda.html

Perry-Darnielle Project, Flying Buttress

Maybe you should call it Esmerelda the Flying Buttress

― Michael White (Hereward), Thursday, 13 May 2004 14:09 (nineteen years ago) link

Goth boooooooo-oooooo-oooo-teeee

― Baaderoni (Fabfunk), Thursday, 13 May 2004 14:18 (nineteen years ago) link

Baaderoni

I heard that in the voice of the Mexican soccer commentator who yells "Goooooooooooooooooooooooal!" Of course, now I'll be vegging some saturday watching futbol and when someone scores I'll be thinking Goth boooooooo-oooooo-oooo-teeee

― Michael White (Hereward), Thursday, 13 May 2004 14:42 (nineteen years ago) link

Shake your rump-ah:
http://images.amazon.com/images/P/B00005EBUH.01.LZZZZZZZ.jpg

― sexyDancer, Thursday, 13 May 2004 20:24 (nineteen years ago) link

Your hatred suppository makes you strong

Can I just say I'm particularly pleased with myself for this line?

― VengaDan Perry (Dan Perry), Thursday, 13 May 2004 20:32 (nineteen years ago) link

cold gape of the aaaanus,
fuck washing a hat

Why did it take me so long to get involved in this thread?!

― roxymuzak (roxymuzak), Thursday, 13 May 2004 20:38 (nineteen years ago) link

Oh right, it's called "Gothic Anus."

― roxymuzak (roxymuzak), Thursday, 13 May 2004 20:38 (nineteen years ago) link

you thought it was gothic arts?

― frank swedehead, Thursday, 13 May 2004 21:10 (nineteen years ago) link

I thought it was best avoided.

― roxymuzak (roxymuzak), Thursday, 13 May 2004 21:11 (nineteen years ago) link

I thought it said gothic cathedrals damn i must be in the wrong thread, whats an anus?

― Frank swedehead, Thursday, 13 May 2004 21:19 (nineteen years ago) link

'I thought it was best avoided.'

You thought ilx's goth obsession had been taken just that step too far..

And you were right!

― de, Thursday, 13 May 2004 21:21 (nineteen years ago) link

I think your friend meant gargoyles and vampires were flying out of your but to the tune of "Third Uncle".

Bahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha

― Alex in NYC (vassifer), Thursday, 13 May 2004 22:21 (nineteen years ago) link

GOTHIC ANUS (47 new answers, 8 unread)
Can a blonde girl have brown eyes? (66 new answers, 29 unread)

― Kingfish Disraeli (Kingfish), Friday, 14 May 2004 01:00 (nineteen years ago) link

GG ALLIN is god

― christopher dean chauncey (indeson187), Friday, 14 May 2004 02:49 (nineteen years ago) link

Skipping 32 messages at this point... Click here if you want to load them all.

― Trayce, Monday, 26 March 2007 20:28 (seventeen years ago) link

(still roffling at dark entries tho)

― Trayce, Monday, 26 March 2007 20:29 (seventeen years ago) link

cold eyes of the vampire,
black wings of the bat;
cold gape of the aaaanus,
fuck washing a hat

haha back when I first read this I had never heard J0hn's singing voice, this is so so much awesomer now that I can hear it in my ~~gothic anus~~ mind's ear.

― nickalicious, Monday, 26 March 2007 20:43 (seventeen years ago) link

THIS THREAD.

― Curt1s Stephens, Monday, 26 March 2007 20:51 (seventeen years ago) link

I'm still at the "JESUS CHRIST, NED" stage.

― HI DERE, Monday, 26 March 2007 20:58 (seventeen years ago) link

O, the secret salacious splendor that is your black orchid anus in the moonlit shadows!

― Abbott, Monday, 26 March 2007 20:59 (seventeen years ago) link

I like to think the initial poster meant something more innocent, like American Gothic Anus.

― nickalicious, Monday, 26 March 2007 21:00 (seventeen years ago) link

Why did it take me so long to get involved in this thread?!

roxymuzak (roxymuzak) on Thursday, May 13, 2004 4:38 PM (2 years ago)

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Oh right, it's called "Gothic Anus."

roxymuzak (roxymuzak) on Thursday, May 13, 2004 4:38 PM (2 years ago)

This is still incredibly funny, tho.

― HI DERE, Monday, 26 March 2007 21:02 (seventeen years ago) link

whats the big deal if dude wants to get his salad tossed by an infant

― and what, Monday, 26 March 2007 21:53 (seventeen years ago) link

no words can describe.
http://badgas.co.uk/moments/moment_123.jpg

― the table is the table, Monday, 26 March 2007 22:47 (seventeen years ago) link

Accouterments aside, that girl's terror comes from how freakishly disproportionate she is!

― Abbott, Monday, 26 March 2007 22:51 (seventeen years ago) link

two months pass...

I STILL LOVE THIS THREAD MUST REVIVE A++++

― Trayce, Thursday, 21 June 2007 10:32 (sixteen years ago) link

I think your friend meant gargoyles and vampires were flying out of your but to the tune of "Third Uncle".

-- VengaDan Perry (Dan Perry), Thursday, 13 May 2004 01:07 (3 years ago) Bookmark Link

Ha ha ha ha ha

― Pashmina, Thursday, 21 June 2007 10:35 (sixteen years ago) link

Dan and J0hn were fucking top class on this thread.

― Trayce, Thursday, 21 June 2007 10:37 (sixteen years ago) link

...I was gonna say "top hole on this thread" but ... UH.

― Trayce, Thursday, 21 June 2007 10:39 (sixteen years ago) link

(google image search)
Your search - "gothic anus" - did not match any documents.

Suggestions:
- Make sure all words are spelled correctly.
- Try different keywords.
- Try more general keywords.
- Try fewer keywords.

PRAISE THE LORD.

-- nickalicious (nickalicious

Well that's all changed in three short years. See for yourself.

― moley, Thursday, 21 June 2007 10:44 (sixteen years ago) link

lol no thanx

― Trayce, Thursday, 21 June 2007 10:45 (sixteen years ago) link

haha a mere 53 minutes from start of thread to goatse.cx!

― CharlieNo4, Thursday, 21 June 2007 13:14 (sixteen years ago) link

:D this thread

― Curt1s Stephens, Thursday, 21 June 2007 17:36 (sixteen years ago) link

still classic.

― forksclovetofu, Thursday, 21 June 2007 20:08 (sixteen years ago) link

"gothic anus" is playing through my head to the tune of "I Touch Roses"

― Curt1s Stephens, Thursday, 21 June 2007 20:12 (sixteen years ago) link

nine months pass...

yeah, it's about time to revive this thread

― HI DERE, Wednesday, 9 April 2008 21:08 (sixteen years ago) link

Gooogle tells me Gothic Anus is now a record label. They must release some dark shit.

― moley, Wednesday, 9 April 2008 22:23 (sixteen years ago) link

I shouldn't laugh as hard as I am laughing at moley's use of the word "release," but what the hell, I am who I am

― J0hn D., Wednesday, 9 April 2008 22:53 (sixteen years ago) link

that would be excelsiored to death if I had cut & paste on this thing

― Autumn Almanac, Wednesday, 9 April 2008 22:57 (sixteen years ago) link

ROTHIC ANUS

http://celebslam.buzznet.com/wp-content/uploads/2007/06/david-lee-roth-hair-1.jpg

― Curt1s Stephens, Wednesday, 9 April 2008 23:09 (sixteen years ago) link

lol

― latebloomer, Wednesday, 9 April 2008 23:59 (sixteen years ago) link

ok i'm not a "ICH ICH DIE AFTER NICHT SAFE FÜR ARBEIT!!" type, but if less icky threads got a NSFW tag... just sayin'

― Mackro Mackro, Thursday, 10 April 2008 03:19 (sixteen years ago) link

Tempted to turn Perry's lyrix into a black metal opus.

― libcrypt, Thursday, 10 April 2008 03:23 (sixteen years ago) link

five months pass...

http://www.steve.gb.com/images/me/anus.jpg

― ‫‬‭‮‪‫‬‭‮҉)ttegåR deN (Catsupppppppppppppp dude 茄蕃), Wednesday, 17 September 2008 23:05 (fifteen years ago) link

u ok ned?

― I know, right?, Wednesday, 17 September 2008 23:07 (fifteen years ago) link

one year passes...

lol following links in old threads brings you to some funny places

― a Barbie-like nub where he provates should be (HI DERE), Monday, 9 November 2009 20:57 (fourteen years ago) link

follow enough links on ILX and next thing you know you're all up in gothic anus

― someone has done something terrible OH NO (jjjusten), Monday, 9 November 2009 23:14 (fourteen years ago) link

^^^^^^^ too true

― a Barbie-like nub where he provates should be (HI DERE), Monday, 9 November 2009 23:16 (fourteen years ago) link

knee deep in gothic anus over here

― GO THICK AMOS! (jjjusten), Monday, 9 November 2009 23:16 (fourteen years ago) link

tbh i just dont have the time to skim through gothic anus at work today

― GO THICK AMOS! (jjjusten), Monday, 9 November 2009 23:17 (fourteen years ago) link

hahahahahahahahaha

― a Barbie-like nub where he provates should be (HI DERE), Monday, 9 November 2009 23:21 (fourteen years ago) link

"man, the guy who lives in the apartment across from me spent all day reloading gothic anus"

― GO THICK AMOS! (jjjusten), Monday, 9 November 2009 23:25 (fourteen years ago) link

ten years pass...

I wish 2020 would fall deep into a gothic anus

― shout-out to his family (DJP), Sunday, 18 October 2020 15:20 (three years ago) link

are gothic anuses darkened buttholes

― eat my room temperature ass (Neanderthal), Sunday, 18 October 2020 15:22 (three years ago) link

Way too kind a fate.

― pomenitul, Sunday, 18 October 2020 15:22 (three years ago) link

Are you sure it hasn't?

― 1000 Scampo DJs (Noodle Vague), Sunday, 18 October 2020 15:22 (three years ago) link

I'm mildly afraid to google 'GOTHIC ANUS'.

― pomenitul, Sunday, 18 October 2020 15:23 (three years ago) link

google for anus and find 2020

― eat my room temperature ass (Neanderthal), Sunday, 18 October 2020 15:23 (three years ago) link

Hope for 2021:

https://theanarchistlibrary.org/library/georges-bataille-the-solar-anus

― pomenitul, Sunday, 18 October 2020 15:26 (three years ago) link

pro display name, Neanderthal

― shout-out to his family (DJP), Sunday, 18 October 2020 16:14 (three years ago) link

Look into my
Look into my
Deep inside my gothic anus
It shall expose the darkness and despair
Through the veil
My sphincter of malice
Moans and trembles in the pale moonlight
The dark-kinder play
In fields of blood
A wasteland expands from the colon of desire
Gaze into my
Gaze into my
Deep inside my gothic anus
Beams of terror emit forth
The afterlife beckons
From my twisted duodenum
Your heart is leaden
But a kiss will make the constriction explode
Another glance through a gauzy screen
And another demon is born
Submit to my
Bathe inside my
Deep inside my gothic anus
With a bowed head and aching back
The nubs of succubus wings
Giving pixeis the hump of ages
Winding through a small intestine
Dripping with ennui and angst
Your hatred suppository makes you strong
Gothic anus rules us all
Give over to the brownness

MY SPHINCTER OF MALICE

― flamboyant goon tie included, Sunday, 18 October 2020 21:47 (three years ago) link

the "pale moonlight" lyric reminded me of "serious moonlight" which reminded me of Let's Dance era Bowie, and now I have "Gothic Anus" in my head to the tune of "Modern Love" even though it doesn't quite scan ...

― sarahell, Sunday, 18 October 2020 22:55 (three years ago) link

walks beside me
(Gothic Anus) walks on by
(Gothic Anus) gets me to the church on time
(Gothic Anus) terrifies me
(Gothic Anus) makes me party
(Gothic Anus) puts my trust in God and man
(Gothic Anus) no confession
(Gothic Anus) no religion
(Gothic Anus) don't believe in Gothic Anus

― sarahell, Sunday, 18 October 2020 22:57 (three years ago) link

let me know if you want to see the lyrics to the next song -- Gothic Anus Boulevard (Sisters of Mercy)

― sarahell, Sunday, 18 October 2020 22:59 (three years ago) link

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