Did anyone watch Grand Designs last night?

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Fucking hell.


1) The video they had done made me think of Tomb Raider 3.

2) The couple were a bit weird

3) They were fucking minted. This aroused my ire. Anyone who sepdns 34K on a bleeding cooker is a waste of genetic material.

4) The house was bllody marvellous. Might be a clear case of Marxist righteous indignation being a cover for simple envy. The library was very nice, with door disguised as bookcase.

5) The staircase was nice. As was the glass walkway (in the video, replaces industrial mesh grid floor.

6) The bath was far too small for both of them to fit in.

7) It was the kind of house Blofeld would have.

8) The best bit though was the planning dispute. They interviewed the people from (I think) the London Symphony Orchestra who objected to the brick used in the party wall. Because it wasn't their actual property, they could act in their own minds as not personally interested and so more 'rational'. INstead, shorn of any reason to compromise (because you actually have to live there and be neighbourly ultimately) they really got to the heart of the bourgeois nastiness that is contentious small home improvement planning issues. Magnificent to see the true nasty spitefulness come out. More!

For more, including video, visit the Grand Designs website.

Dave B (daveb), Thursday, 22 January 2004 10:37 (seventeen years ago) link

They seemed a strangely mismatched couple I thought.

But yeah, phenomenal house.

Sam (chirombo), Thursday, 22 January 2004 11:00 (seventeen years ago) link

I only saw the start and finish, it's been on before apparently, cos I thought it looked like an amazing plan and when I called Chris in to watch it he said he'd seen it before and she was so annoying he couldn't watch it. He was right.

The best bit of it I saw was the update on the planning application, that approval for the bricks in the party wall had been refused, and that they were appealing. Fantastic!

Vicky (Vicky), Thursday, 22 January 2004 11:00 (seventeen years ago) link

I was so shocked by the £34000 cooker that any further rational analysis went out of the window.


Ricardo (RickyT), Thursday, 22 January 2004 11:19 (seventeen years ago) link

It was a new series, so how has Chris seen this? I think we should be told.

They were odd weren't they? I thought they were both lu-las but I warmed to her; she smiled. He was a bit of a cold fish, but I started to like him when he got all philistine about commissioning art.

They'd been looking for a dream house for 6 years; I wondered at some did they stop loving each other (or will htye?) and instead they love the idea of being people with a grebt house. He provided the cash, she got the plans drawn up and supervised that. I started to wonder what the catacylsmic consequencdes would be if either had a drunken shag vcausing the rellie to fall apart.

Dave B (daveb), Thursday, 22 January 2004 11:21 (seventeen years ago) link

I saw the end of this (I was watching Bob Monkhouse's Heroes of Comedy which seemed to be based on hearsay as they didn't include any interviews with him, and Hairy Women where a guy went look around the Amalfi coast in pursuit of the hirsute - dude, use the internet, it's designed to find hairy women) and I'm glad I didn't see all of it. The way they quickly dismissed the fact that they had spent double their budget of £600,000 made me sick. I'm afraid to say I cheered when it said that their retrospective planning application had been refused.

Alfie (Alfie), Thursday, 22 January 2004 11:22 (seventeen years ago) link

really? Maybe it's been on living tv or something? Or maybe he imagined it.

The house itself was amazing, but they really didn't come over well. How many of the couples/families involved in grand designs do though?

Vicky (Vicky), Thursday, 22 January 2004 11:36 (seventeen years ago) link

"How many of the couples/families involved in grand designs do though?"

The couple who rennovated the derelict water pumping station in Chesterfield did.

Nathan W (Nathan Webb), Thursday, 22 January 2004 11:44 (seventeen years ago) link

Was that the one where they didn't manage to renovate the part that was going to be the bedrooms, so had to sleep in the living room?

caitlin (caitlin), Thursday, 22 January 2004 11:46 (seventeen years ago) link

If that had been the Royal Family doing that, we'd all be at the walls with torches....

mark grout (mark grout), Thursday, 22 January 2004 11:47 (seventeen years ago) link

Don't think so, by the epilogue the house was completely finished, but it was one of the Grand Designs revisited episodes.

Nathan W (Nathan Webb), Thursday, 22 January 2004 11:50 (seventeen years ago) link

No, the one I'm thinking of was also Revisited, and they still hadn't finished it. It was an old water-works with a tower that had had a tank in it; they were going to convert the tank into bedrooms, with new semi-subterranean buildings around it as the living areas. The new parts were finished fine, but by the time the money ran out the tower was still an empty shell.

caitlin (caitlin), Thursday, 22 January 2004 11:54 (seventeen years ago) link

Caitlin, that one sounds very different...weird that there are two water-pumping-station episodes though. I missed the one last night, but saw the other water pumping station one, and really enjoyed it. All their hard work and dedication was amazing, and the building looked fantastic at the end, despite my doubts about the gigantic living room floor plan etc, they really made something uniquely suited to them with relatively little money.

sgs (sgs), Thursday, 22 January 2004 12:01 (seventeen years ago) link

I think I remember the one Sarah describes. Didn't they turn an old Mini into a desk?

Ricardo (RickyT), Thursday, 22 January 2004 12:03 (seventeen years ago) link

Oh, was *that* waterworks one the one that was on a week or two or go? I remember that too - it was *huge*.

The one I'm talking about was in the last series, I think.

caitlin (caitlin), Thursday, 22 January 2004 12:03 (seventeen years ago) link

Yes on both counts. I thought the Mini would be weird, but it looked good with their posters and art, and to scale with the interior.

sgs (sgs), Thursday, 22 January 2004 12:06 (seventeen years ago) link

Sigh. I miss England so much.

Ah, I bet it wasn't as good as the one where we got to laugh at Damien Hirst for spending tens of thousands of pounds on A SHED. That was the best one ever. Better than the two goths with the water tank. (There have been two water pumping station couples.)

Maybe it's schadenfreunde (sp?) but I prefer the ones where everything goes wrong and the smug couples who you want to punch in the face at the beginning of the programme are left debt-ridden and on the verge of divorce at the end.

the river fleet, Thursday, 22 January 2004 14:39 (seventeen years ago) link

all that space for two people is bordering on the obscene, especially in london.

and then they go and put 3 large goldfish in a small spherical bowl. grrr.

that said, the bricks they used for the extra wall did look like a better match for the rest of the wall than the ones that were specified. other bits of the courtyard used the other bricks but that wall was already pink. they just needed a couple of months to get a bit grubbier and less new looking.


koogs (koogs), Thursday, 22 January 2004 21:13 (seventeen years ago) link

that huf haus. i want one. a bespoke, prefab, 3d mondrian.

and would you find 6 english builders as efficient as those germans?


koogs (koogs), Friday, 30 January 2004 12:27 (seventeen years ago) link

The production team probably got a zillion calls yesterday from middle-class handwringers trying to get the number for the German builders.

suzy (suzy), Friday, 30 January 2004 12:31 (seventeen years ago) link

Wasn't there another Grand Desgins - possibly the in the series on interiors, where they brought in German builders and it all went horribly wrong - something to do with a flat roof I think ?

smee (smee), Friday, 30 January 2004 13:58 (seventeen years ago) link

It was the one in Hackney, where they completely ripped the insides of a terrace down. They got Germans in to do the glass walls at the extension, and the flat roof on the extension, and yes, it leaked and had to be re-done.

Vicky (Vicky), Monday, 2 February 2004 10:46 (seventeen years ago) link

because they designed it for the water to actually sit on the roof instead of running away, so that it could act as a further insulator - which I thought was madness, and it was.

That house was rather nice though.

chris (chris), Monday, 2 February 2004 10:52 (seventeen years ago) link

My pal Carlos' old Arch. tutor Jeremy Till was on this last year, as he and his wife (also a top-drawer Arch. lecturer) made this amazing house in the arse-end of N7 where there was hay-bale insulation etc. Which was weird because the place has been in a million supplements.

suzy (suzy), Monday, 2 February 2004 10:53 (seventeen years ago) link

Ooh, I remember that one - that was the one right next to the ECML, was't it?

caitlin (caitlin), Monday, 2 February 2004 11:36 (seventeen years ago) link

Yeah, the one with the hay bails was nice.

Couldn't stand the place with the £34K cooker though. The whole building was like a very impersonal, immaculately finished, public space - with glass walkways and indoor courtyards. It felt like a Terence Conran restaurant or a posh hotel to me. If I worked in the city, that would be the last place on earth I'd want to come home to.

bert (bert), Monday, 2 February 2004 22:33 (seventeen years ago) link

one year passes...
ach the first one in this thread is being repeated now.


jed_ (jed), Wednesday, 11 May 2005 19:37 (sixteen years ago) link

also that huff-haus is now being used on "Footballers Wives"

jed_ (jed), Wednesday, 11 May 2005 19:48 (sixteen years ago) link

i love the LFO for making that couple's lives a misery.

jed_ (jed), Wednesday, 11 May 2005 20:03 (sixteen years ago) link

> being repeated now

'revised repeat', means they don't have to mark it as a repeat in the listings. didn't watch it last night but a part of me hopes it has fallen down since the last visit.

the finnish timber kit house looked fun. like lego only bigger. (and only £65k for the entire kit)

koogs (koogs), Thursday, 12 May 2005 07:27 (sixteen years ago) link

Yes the Finnish DIY house was fab! Nice woodworking man put one of the support pillars in the wrong place though.

Liz :x (Liz :x), Thursday, 12 May 2005 07:33 (sixteen years ago) link

I was concerned that that the house they built was terribley energy inefficient. Why do they need six toilets, if there are only two of them in the home?

jel, Thursday, 12 May 2005 07:34 (sixteen years ago) link

I would like to build my own house. I fear it would always be incomplete though.

jel, Thursday, 12 May 2005 07:34 (sixteen years ago) link

yes, i fear that i would be walking on planks for the rest of my life. there'd be a path from the door to the chair to the kitchen to the bathroom to the tv and the rest would remain rubular for ever.

> terribley energy inefficient.

rich people, i have decided, don't care. if they can afford the bills it's ok for them to use as much as they like, they feel. for all of us who bother to recycle there's someone like my boss who drives a hummer.

koogs (koogs), Thursday, 12 May 2005 09:05 (sixteen years ago) link

I saw it first time round. Really unpleasant tosspot people, very nice house. I'm not sure, but I think it would have cost them as much as the cooker to pull the wall down and do it properly, but they thought it was extortionate. It might have been more though. Who cares, they could afford it.

The other insufferable couple were the ones (well, come to think of it, they were all insufferable) who decided to build a New England clapboard (or whatever) house in Sussex and the bloke built his own fireplce and it looked like a bloody great Babapapa in the corner.

The only ones who weren't entirely insufferable were that Pet Shop Boys bloke and his boyfriend and they were only bearable because they were subjected to homophobia (or so they thought, sadly we didn't get to see any of it).

I would like just a little wooden house.

PJ Miller (PJ Miller), Thursday, 12 May 2005 09:47 (sixteen years ago) link

I remember the New England house in Sussex from last year. That couple made me seethe - especially when the lady described one area as a 'meditation room'.

The folks who renovated the 19th C. house in Leith were nice.

robster (robster), Thursday, 12 May 2005 09:53 (sixteen years ago) link

"C. house" would be appropriate terminology for the kind of people who go on these programmes.

Marcello Carlin (nostudium), Thursday, 12 May 2005 09:56 (sixteen years ago) link

Is that the couple who were climbers Rob? I liked them, they were nice.

I also remember a guy who made a house out of straw in France? He was a nice down to earth chap, and his house ended up looking grebt.

Rumpie, Thursday, 12 May 2005 10:05 (sixteen years ago) link

I'm all for having a few mod cons in the kitchen, but a £34,000 COOKER? That's not even funny, it's a disgusting, excessive display of wealth that made me sick.

AND a dumb waiter - not only that but a HEATED dumb waiter!!!

Huey (Huey), Thursday, 12 May 2005 10:36 (sixteen years ago) link

Yeah, the climbers. They had a nailgun that went through STEEL.

robster (robster), Thursday, 12 May 2005 10:40 (sixteen years ago) link

You're thinking of the Three Little Pigs, Rumpie.

Next week, a foolish man builds his house upon the sands.

I missed the ones with nice people, I was in a state of seethe.

PJ Miller (PJ Miller), Thursday, 12 May 2005 10:43 (sixteen years ago) link

The climbers were great. I loved the way they seemd to treat the whole exercise as one big excuse to hang off the side of the building at precarious angles.

RickyT (RickyT), Thursday, 12 May 2005 10:48 (sixteen years ago) link

What's the update on the house? How much did they spend on resolving the issue of the mismatched brickwork? Are they divorced?

Dave B (daveb), Thursday, 12 May 2005 10:50 (sixteen years ago) link

Not divorced yet, but he's definitely having an affair.

Rumpy Pumpkin, Thursday, 12 May 2005 11:00 (sixteen years ago) link

The council suggested they got someone in to tint the bricks. Which was objected to by the LFO. The police were called to enforce the councils decision. When presenter chappy asked if they wished they'd given in to start with they said no cos it would have been too expensive. 'Too expensive?','yes, it would have cost about £30,000'. Sadly no news on whether the £34,000 cooker was in working order yet.

RickyT (RickyT), Thursday, 12 May 2005 11:12 (sixteen years ago) link

much as i hated the couple the footage of the LFO meeting was hysterical. "so do you want the wall torn down?" - "no, thats not good enough because it shouldn't have been there in the first place". I'm surprised that people liked this weeks house though, i just thought it that kind of kind of good taste that can be bought, utterly uninpired. The tall atrium/dining space looked just like a meeting room in a corporate office space mixed with the communal area in bad girls.

jed_ (jed), Thursday, 12 May 2005 11:43 (sixteen years ago) link

I didn't think much

RJG (RJG), Thursday, 12 May 2005 12:10 (sixteen years ago) link

What does the F stand for in LFO?

PJ Miller (PJ Miller), Thursday, 12 May 2005 12:22 (sixteen years ago) link


RJG (RJG), Thursday, 12 May 2005 12:22 (sixteen years ago) link

or funkie

RJG (RJG), Thursday, 12 May 2005 12:23 (sixteen years ago) link

guy fucked it

be goose, do crimes (||||||||), Thursday, 10 October 2019 08:02 (two years ago) link

can he play rb

it was a least interesting episode, fuck all about design and all about a horrible family

too many cuckth thpoil the broth (darraghmac), Thursday, 10 October 2019 08:26 (two years ago) link

the house that the euphoria series of dance music compilations failed to build

conrad, Thursday, 10 October 2019 09:01 (two years ago) link

ministry of housing

too many cuckth thpoil the broth (darraghmac), Thursday, 10 October 2019 09:27 (two years ago) link

are you all talking about this lighthouse one that's on repeat right now?

kinder, Sunday, 13 October 2019 17:22 (two years ago) link


koogs, Sunday, 13 October 2019 17:25 (two years ago) link

This thing had hubris written all over it from the beginninng, your kids don't need a double room with an en suite each.

The Pingularity (ledge), Sunday, 13 October 2019 20:16 (two years ago) link

beginni the beguinninni

The Pingularity (ledge), Sunday, 13 October 2019 20:16 (two years ago) link

only caught the end. 4 million quid, was it?

kinder, Sunday, 13 October 2019 20:23 (two years ago) link

plus eight years plus one marriage

The Pingularity (ledge), Sunday, 13 October 2019 20:37 (two years ago) link

minus one house

The Pingularity (ledge), Sunday, 13 October 2019 20:38 (two years ago) link

five months pass...

new series of Australian GD started last night. they do love their Cor-ten steel.

koogs, Thursday, 19 March 2020 12:14 (one year ago) link

two months pass...

Australian Grand Designs on again nightly. repeats of a series i didn't see at the time.

that thing where they are surveying the plot and the date pops up on screen and it's 7 years ago. and they're still talking about being in before christmas...

(two married bishops, ren fair fans, medieval timber frame building, on a slope, and he's insisting on sanding all the beams himself)

koogs, Thursday, 18 June 2020 07:31 (one year ago) link

add to that a 5m stained glass window

koogs, Thursday, 18 June 2020 07:34 (one year ago) link

six months pass...

new series (which'll probably be the usual 4 new buildings and then 'revised repeats')

digging down 6m next to an ancient graveyard, what could possibly go wrong?

koogs, Wednesday, 6 January 2021 21:42 (nine months ago) link

at least they're not building on top of it.

ledge, Wednesday, 6 January 2021 21:43 (nine months ago) link

has he not watched Poltergeist?

(i'm only 15 minutes in but i can see where this is going)

koogs, Wednesday, 6 January 2021 21:46 (nine months ago) link

I hate him

nob lacks, noirish (darraghmac), Wednesday, 6 January 2021 22:00 (nine months ago) link

two weeks pass...

second episode quite impressive

but this series is being hit by covid. they are digging, they are digging, [covid happens], final distanced reveal. they seem to be skipping a lot of the middle of the process.

koogs, Thursday, 21 January 2021 15:24 (nine months ago) link

third episode looks like they are building something very similar to the temporary theatres that went up in w12 - mansard roof, steel skeleton, sips panels.

koogs, Thursday, 21 January 2021 15:37 (nine months ago) link

Is this the guy who was moving his kids, new mrs, new kid, old parent, old ste parent all in?

I quite liked the way it turned out tbh

Qanondorf (darraghmac), Thursday, 21 January 2021 15:38 (nine months ago) link

episode 3, yes

the theatre i was talking about. the making-of video shows the shape better, and not just the square facade.


koogs, Thursday, 21 January 2021 16:09 (nine months ago) link

These two deserve each other

This fella really thinks hes a visionary, back-of-fagbox designing hus version of things that have already been commercially available for ages

Genuinely seems like he's not quite there.

Tragic for her she had to get a job filling wrinkles to afford cushions

Qanondorf (darraghmac), Wednesday, 27 January 2021 21:39 (eight months ago) link

Right im banning this programme from the house

Qanondorf (darraghmac), Wednesday, 27 January 2021 22:01 (eight months ago) link

a caption saying "May 2017", nevr a good sign.

'we'll be in by next christmas...', yeah, right.

was the earth ship he visited a previous GD? looked very familiar, especially the tyres.

(i also think i remember his dad on tomorrow's world)

koogs, Thursday, 28 January 2021 13:58 (eight months ago) link

This is possibly the worst episode I’ve ever seen. I kinda wanna break things because I’ve seen it.

a hoy hoy, Wednesday, 3 February 2021 21:43 (eight months ago) link

Fuck im glad we left the music on and the tv off so because every episode is that for me

cpt otm (darraghmac), Wednesday, 3 February 2021 21:47 (eight months ago) link

i always absolutely despise the folk in this show. can't bring myself to watch it again, blood-pressure-ruiner.

Dusty Benelux (jim in vancouver), Wednesday, 3 February 2021 21:49 (eight months ago) link

they saved the mill by ruining the mill. not that you can live in a mill but...

koogs, Thursday, 4 February 2021 16:23 (eight months ago) link

Cool couple mill baby

cpt otm (darraghmac), Thursday, 4 February 2021 16:34 (eight months ago) link

seven months pass...

Love this bothy

fix up luke shawp (darraghmac), Wednesday, 15 September 2021 20:52 (one month ago) link

i liked the triangular thing from last week, built on an odd plot between a railway line and a main road and bisected by a sewer.

koogs, Thursday, 16 September 2021 06:22 (one month ago) link

bothy: deems nuts (about it)

kinder, Thursday, 16 September 2021 06:43 (one month ago) link

Oh dearie me no

Xp yeah that was also a delight

The show is so much better when the problem/constraints are real and not just idiot ambition

fix up luke shawp (darraghmac), Thursday, 16 September 2021 13:57 (one month ago) link

big pavilion was nice but I'm sure there was a way of having fewer than 3 spare bedrooms and keeping the favourite tree of the guy who almost single handedly built it for you

koogs, Saturday, 25 September 2021 14:08 (one month ago) link

Only half watching but this fella is a dolt

fix up luke shawp (darraghmac), Wednesday, 29 September 2021 20:40 (three weeks ago) link

Love the result mind

fix up luke shawp (darraghmac), Wednesday, 29 September 2021 20:56 (three weeks ago) link

Do you feel the pressure, Fernando

kinder, Wednesday, 29 September 2021 21:06 (three weeks ago) link

kevin's jeggings

koogs, Thursday, 30 September 2021 18:48 (three weeks ago) link

Hes a gangster kevin you can say it

fix up luke shawp (darraghmac), Wednesday, 13 October 2021 20:06 (one week ago) link

Has it been worth watching recently? I think I hit a point, a few years back, where everyone seemed to be a million quid short and could always find it ... and I stopped caring.

djh, Wednesday, 13 October 2021 20:37 (one week ago) link

(TBF, I might just have seen one shit episode that put me off for a bit).

djh, Wednesday, 13 October 2021 20:43 (one week ago) link

I definitely hit that wall, covid era has meant things get at least that interesting again

Def true that the actual designs and builds became less and less interesting or the central focus years ago which made it a far worse show imo

fix up luke shawp (darraghmac), Wednesday, 13 October 2021 21:03 (one week ago) link

A few of the recent ones definitely had more interesting, challenging builds with very good stuff in them (and quite likeable people) tbf

fix up luke shawp (darraghmac), Wednesday, 13 October 2021 21:03 (one week ago) link

i think at this point i prefer the Australian and New Zealand ones, they seem more varied. or the various George Clark budget versions.

koogs, Thursday, 14 October 2021 05:34 (one week ago) link

(also My Floating Home)

koogs, Thursday, 14 October 2021 05:36 (one week ago) link

5 minutes into yesterday's and the guy seems like a cock

koogs, Thursday, 14 October 2021 18:28 (one week ago) link

No double entendre but he grew on me

fix up luke shawp (darraghmac), Thursday, 14 October 2021 19:15 (one week ago) link


nice enough house but fuck a pointless cantilever.

koogs, Thursday, 14 October 2021 19:17 (one week ago) link

tinie tempah doing a good job on Extraordinary Extensions despite the odd premise - he seems to know his stuff and is affable. quite fetching pink titles too.

koogs, Thursday, 21 October 2021 09:51 (four days ago) link

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