that's how I always compliment the women in my life
― I? not I! He! He! HIM! (akm), Saturday, 16 December 2023 18:00 (five months ago) link
yeah just at a quick glance you can tell these are superb apes, made by dedicated craftsmen from quality ingredients.
― the world is your octopus (Camaraderie at Arms Length), Saturday, 16 December 2023 18:04 (five months ago) link
makes me pull my hair out and weep thinking about what these common criminals will do with them
― the world is your octopus (Camaraderie at Arms Length), Saturday, 16 December 2023 18:06 (five months ago) link
See below from Dingaling
― butt dumb tight my boners got boners (the table is the table), Saturday, 16 December 2023 19:02 (five months ago) link
Ape-ocalypse Now
― Beyond Goo and Evol (President Keyes), Saturday, 16 December 2023 19:43 (five months ago) link
― Expansion to Mackerel (Boring, Maryland), Saturday, 16 December 2023 19:55 (five months ago) link
- Chuck Berry
― CthulhuLululemon (Ye Mad Puffin), Saturday, 16 December 2023 20:26 (five months ago) link
top tier apes, tho
― the new drip king (DJP), Sunday, 17 December 2023 12:35 (four months ago) link
Looking forward to the true-crime heist film sure to follow. I wanna hear a lot of ape-related Mamet dialogue.
― a man often referred to in the news media as the Duke of Saxony (tipsy mothra), Sunday, 17 December 2023 17:16 (four months ago) link
"So it's apes huh.""Top tier apes.""Top tier. Top tier?""The man says top tier.""Top tier apes.""Top fucking tier."*low whistle*"All right.""All right?""OK. It's a go.""It's a go?""We'll take the apes.""Every fucking ape. Every. Fucking. Ape. Top tier."
― a man often referred to in the news media as the Duke of Saxony (tipsy mothra), Sunday, 17 December 2023 17:19 (four months ago) link
All joking aside I would love this person to explain what makes them top tier.
― Expansion to Mackerel (Boring, Maryland), Sunday, 17 December 2023 17:37 (four months ago) link
Good news! The apes have been recovered, after a bounty payment. Apes are reported to be doing well.
https://cointelegraph.com/news/nft-trader-stolen-bayc-mayc-returned-bounty-payment
― a man often referred to in the news media as the Duke of Saxony (tipsy mothra), Sunday, 17 December 2023 18:46 (four months ago) link
so ridiculous
― treeship., Sunday, 17 December 2023 18:48 (four months ago) link
need to check them properly, if they've been infected with a computer virus they'll have to be culled
― the world is your octopus (Camaraderie at Arms Length), Sunday, 17 December 2023 18:49 (four months ago) link
They might have monkeypox
― CthulhuLululemon (Ye Mad Puffin), Sunday, 17 December 2023 19:12 (four months ago) link
a fungible infection
― assert (matttkkkk), Sunday, 17 December 2023 19:27 (four months ago) link
That one tweet has so many quotables
― Formica Jordan (Neanderthal), Monday, 18 December 2023 03:14 (four months ago) link
Here's how you do it.. create your OWN crypto currency and sell it to the marks
A Colorado pastor and his wife have been charged with duping hundreds of local Christians in a multimillion dollar a cryptocurrency scheme.
Prosecutors accuse pastor Eli Regalado and his wife, Kaitlyn, of fraudulently raising over $3m (£2.4m) by selling "practically worthless" crypto.
The Regalados pocketed at least $1.3m in the alleged scheme between June 2022 and April 2023, prosecutors say.
Mr Regalado said his plan was inspired by God, according to court filings.
The pastor said that "God told him directly that investors would become wealthy" by investing into INDXcoin, a cryptocurrency created, marketed, and sold by the Regalados, according to the complaint.
INDXcoin was offered to Denver-area Christians through the Kingdom Wealth Exchange, an online cryptocurrency exchange owned and operated by the Regalados.
The couple "had no experience in cryptocurrency", the complaint said, and a third-party auditor found INDXcoin to be "unsafe, unsecure and riddled with technical problems".
"Despite that report, the Regalados allegedly continued to promote the INDXcoin as a low-risk, high-profit investment," it said.
"In reality, the INDXcoin was illiquid and practically worthless" and the couple used the funds for "their lavish lifestyle".
― Andy the Grasshopper, Tuesday, 23 January 2024 18:15 (three months ago) link
https://www.the-sun.com/wp-content/uploads/sites/6/2022/01/SF-righteous-gemstones-season-2-COMP-1-1.jpg?w=620
― Beyond Goo and Evol (President Keyes), Tuesday, 23 January 2024 18:21 (three months ago) link
lmao yes, I hope the writers are taking notes
tbh I am not sure what is illegal about this? what's the difference between this an an apes jpeg?
― frogbs, Tuesday, 23 January 2024 18:24 (three months ago) link
the difference is the sophistication of the fraud and the elaboration of the pitch. when your customers happily swallow a line about how god is giving them investment advice through you, then taking their money is as easy as falling off a log so why bother with sophistication?
― more difficult than I look (Aimless), Tuesday, 23 January 2024 18:32 (three months ago) link
Ha... what a snake
Regalado added: “A few hundred thousand dollars went to a home remodel the Lord told us to do.
“We took God at his word and sold a cryptocurrency with no clear exit.”
― Andy the Grasshopper, Tuesday, 23 January 2024 18:36 (three months ago) link
The lord told me to pay someone $20 to kick that cryptopastor’s ass. There is a higher law
― z_tbd, Tuesday, 23 January 2024 18:41 (three months ago) link
I am not defending them, but tbh, don’t really see how this is any different than regular tithing.
― butt dumb tight my boners got boners (the table is the table), Tuesday, 23 January 2024 18:46 (three months ago) link
Jesus he knows me, and he knows I'm right
― never trust a big book and a simile (Neanderthal), Tuesday, 23 January 2024 18:48 (three months ago) link
I'd have to see the details of the "investment" claim, but when you tithe you know you're giving money to the church that you won't get back. Not in money, anyway.
― nickn, Tuesday, 23 January 2024 18:49 (three months ago) link
should have just offered a traditional 401(k), people would be less angry if they were investing in the Acts of the Apostles Aggressive Growth Fund or the Barabbas Bond Fund
― never trust a big book and a simile (Neanderthal), Tuesday, 23 January 2024 18:55 (three months ago) link
I’m sure it has to do with the promise of a monetary return on investment. All sorts of laws kick in at that point.
― B. Amato (Boring, Maryland), Tuesday, 23 January 2024 18:58 (three months ago) link
Another thing - it was apparently a 'virtual church,' i.e services on zoom or something.. there was no physical building
― Andy the Grasshopper, Tuesday, 23 January 2024 19:02 (three months ago) link
god is everywhere
― Beyond Goo and Evol (President Keyes), Tuesday, 23 January 2024 19:08 (three months ago) link
except the bathroom
― never trust a big book and a simile (Neanderthal), Tuesday, 23 January 2024 19:39 (three months ago) link
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Toilet_god
― Beyond Goo and Evol (President Keyes), Tuesday, 23 January 2024 19:40 (three months ago) link
And Jesus went into the temple of God, and cast out all them that sold and bought in the temple, and overthrew the tables of the money changers
― Andy the Grasshopper, Tuesday, 23 January 2024 19:53 (three months ago) link
many are saying that the return on investment on tithing is 90%
― z_tbd, Tuesday, 23 January 2024 23:04 (three months ago) link
https://i.dailymail.co.uk/1s/2024/01/20/16/80256473-0-image-a-18_1705767451635.jpg
― mookieproof, Wednesday, 24 January 2024 05:22 (three months ago) link
Ah, grift. Enjoy a gift link!
https://www.nytimes.com/2024/02/02/business/bitboy-ben-armstrong.html?unlocked_article_code=1.SU0.XIQw.waNRmXK-BCc_&bgrp=g&smid=url-share
Among other joys:
Back then, BitBoy was one of the most popular figures in the wild, scam-ridden world of crypto influencers. Cultivating a persona as a straight-talking everyman, he filmed a livestream five days a week in which he lectured his hundreds of thousands of listeners on the virtues of experimental coins with names like Polkadot or XRP. He said that regulators were fools, and that digital money offered a path to upward mobility. The Lamborghini was vivid proof: Crypto would make you rich and cool and successful.Two years later, Mr. Armstrong, 41, has lost his production company and much of his wealth. His friends have turned on him, and his wife has filed for divorce. Over the last five months, across countless social media posts and videos, Mr. Armstrong has claimed to be the victim of a “criminal conspiracy” by “terrorists” who took over his YouTube channel. “BitBoy is dead,” he recently declared....“I’m going through a midlife crisis,” Mr. Armstrong said in one of several recent interviews. “A spiritual crisis.”....Like any charismatic salesman, Mr. Armstrong has a carefully honed pitch: He used to be just a regular guy, he likes to say, until crypto changed his life. After undergoing treatment for a methamphetamine addiction in the early 2000s, he attended a Christian college and ended up marrying his admissions counselor.
Two years later, Mr. Armstrong, 41, has lost his production company and much of his wealth. His friends have turned on him, and his wife has filed for divorce. Over the last five months, across countless social media posts and videos, Mr. Armstrong has claimed to be the victim of a “criminal conspiracy” by “terrorists” who took over his YouTube channel. “BitBoy is dead,” he recently declared....
“I’m going through a midlife crisis,” Mr. Armstrong said in one of several recent interviews. “A spiritual crisis.”....
Like any charismatic salesman, Mr. Armstrong has a carefully honed pitch: He used to be just a regular guy, he likes to say, until crypto changed his life. After undergoing treatment for a methamphetamine addiction in the early 2000s, he attended a Christian college and ended up marrying his admissions counselor.
And especially this bit about the woman he's having an affair with:
Since the summer, Ms. Wolfe has been working with Mr. Armstrong to rebuild his fan base and fight for control of his company. Before she got interested in crypto, she considered law school, she said, and ran a small clinic for people who wanted to represent themselves in court — mostly men in divorce cases.Ms. Wolfe, who has been married and divorced four times, met Mr. Armstrong at a conference in 2022 as she was trying to make her way in the crypto industry. A few months later, an astrologer she had found on the gig work site Fiverr told her that someone was about to “change the trajectory” of her career.
Ms. Wolfe, who has been married and divorced four times, met Mr. Armstrong at a conference in 2022 as she was trying to make her way in the crypto industry. A few months later, an astrologer she had found on the gig work site Fiverr told her that someone was about to “change the trajectory” of her career.
― Ned Raggett, Friday, 2 February 2024 20:56 (three months ago) link
iirc he posted an epic series of tweets about this a month or two ago
― mookieproof, Saturday, 3 February 2024 00:35 (three months ago) link
It is with a heavy heart I announce the sale of my long term ape, Salazar. Most of my early followers know me as this ape. My kids know me as this ape. I met my wife when I WAS this ape and had my first kid when I was still proudly wore this ape. By extension, it is part of me.… pic.twitter.com/Gv3cwFZyQc— vydamo (@vydamo_) March 28, 2024
― 𝔠𝔞𝔢𝔨 (caek), Friday, 29 March 2024 15:36 (one month ago) link
As of today, March 28, 2024, Pacman has refused to acknowledge our letter.
― President Keyes, Friday, 29 March 2024 15:39 (one month ago) link
"International Ape Workshop"...
― koogs, Friday, 29 March 2024 16:36 (one month ago) link
"I recently lost Bumbledoor Glockbottoms to a North Korean zero-day hack. It's tough living without such a critical part of me"
― koogs, Friday, 29 March 2024 16:38 (one month ago) link
Godspeed, Salazar
― jmm, Friday, 29 March 2024 16:43 (one month ago) link
Kicking someone who lost essentially a part of them is real class broNice— vydamo (@vydamo_) March 28, 2024
― President Keyes, Friday, 29 March 2024 16:44 (one month ago) link
Good luck explaining the 21st Century to any humans still surviving after the 21st Century is over.
― Great-Tasting Burger Perceptions (Old Lunch), Friday, 29 March 2024 16:44 (one month ago) link
well, shoot, y'all, it's with a mighty heavy heart i gotta up and tell ya 'bout the sale of my ol' buddy, salazar, the fella with egg all over his mug most folks 'round these parts know me when i'm with him my young'uns reckon i'm his partner in crime, and heck, i even courted my missus with this egg-faced rascal been part of my hide for a dog's age
me and ol' salazar, we've been ramblin' 'cross god's green earth together, from them fancy hotels to them rowdy honky-tonks, and them peaceful beaches too but doggone it, them shenanigans of damon albarn and his britpop troupe done gone and turned my egg-splattered pal into a dime-store trinket ever since damon albarn moseyed on in, his market price done fell from a sky-high 85 eggs down to a measly dozen
regrettably, i gotta bid adieu to my ol' buddy to save what's left of my bacon 'fore it's cooked to all y'all good folks in the egg-faced brotherhood who've been sendin' kind words my way, i tip my hat to ya 'til we meet again down the road, so long for now and who knows, maybe one day we'll cross paths again on the other side of the fence until then, take care, y'hear
https://i.imgur.com/FdrOKzt.png
― z_tbd, Friday, 29 March 2024 16:51 (one month ago) link
This has been Gorillaz's plot all along, hasn't it?
― jmm, Friday, 29 March 2024 16:57 (one month ago) link
That guy’s avatar is a modified Pepe isn’t it
― Slorg is not on the Slerf Team, you idiot, you moron (Boring, Maryland), Friday, 29 March 2024 18:12 (one month ago) link
this is like the storyboard for a Longmont Potion Castle prank call
― frogbs, Friday, 29 March 2024 18:15 (one month ago) link
I regret to inform you that tweet is a bit. Apologies for forwarding.
― 𝔠𝔞𝔢𝔨 (caek), Friday, 29 March 2024 19:11 (one month ago) link
I don't care - Do U?
Two brothers who studied at one of the most prestigious universities in the US have been charged with stealing $25m (£20m) in cryptocurrency in 12 seconds.
Anton Peraire-Bueno, 24, and James Peraire-Bueno, 28, are accused of wire fraud and money laundering.
"The Peraire-Bueno brothers stole $25 million in Ethereum cryptocurrency through a technologically sophisticated, cutting-edge scheme they plotted for months and executed in seconds," said Deputy Attorney General Lisa Monaco.
"The defendants' scheme calls the very integrity of the blockchain into question," US Attorney Damian Williams said in a statement on Wednesday, referring to the public ledger that records crypto payments.
― Andy the Grasshopper, Thursday, 16 May 2024 00:19 (sixteen hours ago) link