Innocuous shit over which conservatives lose their shit

Apologies if there's already a dedicated thread for this.

Inspired by:

https://www.nytimes.com/2021/02/25/business/mr-potato-head-gender-neutral.html

https://www.rollingstone.com/culture/culture-news/gender-neutral-potato-head-twitter-anger-1133419/

https://i.pinimg.com/474x/8a/7a/7a/8a7a7a1f0a994e761885cd03d041aaf6.jpg

Ah yes, brings a nostalgic tear to my eye.

THEY ARE TRYING TO BAN THE SONG BABY IT IS COLD OUTSIDE

https://previews.123rf.com/images/chudtsankov/chudtsankov1011/chudtsankov101100382/8284677-happy-holidays-greeting-with-a-snowman-and-cute-birds.jpg

oops sorry so big

brie

Heh, I missed that one. What's the beef?

This article explains it better than I could:

http://archive.boston.com/bostonglobe/ideas/theword/2008/10/brie_and_chabli.html

Muhammad Ali being called Muhammad Ali

Thanks, I was not aware. Kind of similar to 'champagne socialist' or what the French call 'la gauche caviar'.

xp

I guess avocado toast has somewhat supplanted brie as an appetizer that infuriates the right

putting any kind of content warning before anything at all

A helicopter flying over the neighbourhood

No “Mr.” in front of Potato Head really throws off the jingle in my mind.

not long before we get the annual complaints re Easter Eggs not having the word Easter on them.

People they don't know being in the street near their house

Add to that one: white vans in the area

halal certification labels

people sharing their pronouns

Natural lawns.

Soy products

Proposals to consider implementation of controlled parking zones in a given area

Black History Month

non-gendered bathrooms

the national anthem and honoring the flag

Swearing an oath on something other than a Christian Bible.

poor people getting free food

Proposals to consider implementation of controlled parking zones in a given area

The number of genders

Pressing "1" to Speak English

Poor people using EBT for shrimp

'Token' visibility of non-white people in the public realm, as opposed to the apparently non-token deluge of whiteness that makes up most of western culture. Suppose that's not innocuous for conservatives, rather it's the basis of their entire worldview.

Any suggestion that Christianity is not/should not be infused within every molecule of American life (AKA the War on Christianity, in much the same way that we refer to restrictions on shitting in the street as the War on Excretion)

people saying "xmas" instead of "christmas"

Mixed race couples on adverts.

It's not that they object to it, you understand, it's just that on balance there are more in adverts than in the actual population, probably.

citation needed

I admit it is still weird for me seeing mixed race couples in advertisements because I just don't remember ever seeing that in any form of advertisement or even like...a movie or TV show until I was like, 21

Reminds me of a classic. Try comparing results for ‘white couples’ and ‘black couples’ on Google Images. OUTRAGEOUS!

(The part that’s systematically left out is what happens when you merely search for ‘couples’.)

these ppl are monsters and it would be so easy to take this thread into genuinely tragic territory but best not

‘WAP’

uncensored swear words and censored slurs

Good one.

Also, re: soy, I lose approx. 10% of my will to live every time I see someone unironically use the word ‘soyboy’.

soyface

which afaict is non-far-right men expressing joy or basically anything. i can't even google this stuff

Every time a school decides not to teach a particular novel. It's just a fucking novel, and it's not being "banned" they can still read it elsewhere. There are enough novels in this world that there's no particularly compelling case that you just have to teach the one with the N-word in it because it's the one you happened to read in your own english class 30 years ago.

You need to look dour at all times per Herr Peterson lest people take notice of the Kermit-like gurgles coming out of your mouth.

Over here right wingers the right wingers and pseudo-liberals team up to demand that all parking on their particular street be reserved exclusively for themselves—it’s the only thing they want government to do (other than continue murdering brown people)
― Mosholu Porkway (Boring, Maryland), Saturday, February 27, 2021 10:50 AM (one hour ago)

do they not care about garbage and potholes?

it's like:
everyone else: poverty, homelessness, police violence against non-whites, underfunded schools, gentrification
conservatives/pseudo-libs: exclusive parking rights, scary black people, garbage, potholes

UK specific but i'm sure there are analogues

https://marketingweek.imgix.net/content/uploads/2020/03/23132303/GreggsVeganSausageRollFeatured.jpg

The largely fictitious 'issue' of no-platforming for visiting speakers in UK higher education institutions.

Bike lanes

not a conservative thing ime, had one ripped out near me because the "in this house we believe..." sign people cried so hard about the bike lane on their street

in this house we believe
BIKE LANES ARE BAD

Def a 100% conservative gripe in Quebec ime. Right-wing trash radio is rife with rants about how much they loathe cyclists and bike lanes.

probably the reason why i perceive it that way is we are so bad at bike lanes there aren't many in places where conservatives would see them

definitely a conservative thing in certain outer london boroughs. less so in some southwestern suburbs where eco-tories dominate

do they not care about garbage and potholes?

it's like:
everyone else: poverty, homelessness, police violence against non-whites, underfunded schools, gentrification
conservatives/pseudo-libs: exclusive parking rights, scary black people, garbage, potholes

Not just bike lanes but the mere existence of bicycles and the people who ride them. I heard a guy on a local call-in show last year get worked up into a lather about having to share the road with bikes. "Every time I see someone riding a bicycle it makes me want to vote for Trump!"

I live in a neighborhood where there were lawn signs protesting a new BRT route.

I met my previously sign-sporting neighbour catching the offending bus one day. Feigning innocence, I offered that the new route was pretty convenient & had made commuting downtown from our neighborhood much better. “I still think it cost too much,” he grumbled as he boarded & paid his fare.

We also apparently have an “activist city council” because we now have a few bike lanes in the city. They’re trying to ABOLISH CARS, apparently, even though road building & maintenance is one of the city’s largest annual expenditures.

On the subject of ABOLISH CARS, let us not forget green/renewable energy. Windmills (esp), solar panels, electric cars

people with disabilities or underlying health conditions that get a covid vaccination appointment before them/their parents/their pet guinea pig etc

the thought of someone somewhere getting any kind of support

Bike lanes

― Lavator Shemmelpennick, Saturday, February 27, 2021 9:40 PM (three days ago) bookmarkflaglink

not a conservative thing ime, had one ripped out near me because the "in this house we believe..." sign people cried so hard about the bike lane on their street

― superdeep borehole (harbl), Saturday, February 27, 2021 10:01 PM (three days ago) bookmarkflaglink

in this house we believe
BIKE LANES ARE BAD

― superdeep borehole (harbl), Saturday, February 27, 2021 10:01 PM (three days ago) bookmarkflaglink

Our local council have erected a bunch of bollards intended to demark "bike lanes" but are really there to stop vans and caravans parking there. The bollards don't do anything to help cyclists at all, they just narrow the street and everyone knows it's just a brazen anti-traveller and van dweller measure.

Today: 6 out of (infinity) Dr. Seuss books, getting CANCELLED.

in Cambridge they decided to make loads of bike lanes, then they compromised and put most of them on the pavements, then the markings mostly wore out, then they did the same thing over again, so in some places there is a badly-marked lane on the road and another next to it on the pavement, in some places suddenly no lanes at all for long stretches, at the roundabout near my house the bike lane leads right into the middle of the roundabout and right off again, in between two lanes of traffic. Pedestrians are furious at cyclists for using cycle lanes they can't see marked on the pavement, drivers are furious if you use the road. I am convinced nobody who planned these ever had to cycle down them, and with a few exceptions I wish they hadn't bothered.

With CPAC underway, here’s a look at the top concerns of conservative Republicans. pic.twitter.com/HeOHnCjYLd

— Patrick Ruffini (@PatrickRuffini) February 26, 2021

xp bike lanes almost always feel like an after thought or a box ticking exercise by councils. There's an element of "Fine, look, we did it, we built a bike lane", regardless of whether or not it serves its purpose or even makes life for road users and pedestrians any safer

lol @ general moral decline of the country being a conservative concern (i mean it is, it's part of why they're called conservative) ... but there are also so many liberals who are also concerned about this, except "general moral decline" = supporting Trump even though he is a sociopathic piece of shit

Books going out of print.

News to me.

at any point of FOX's 3 days (and counting!) worth of coverage on "Dr Seuss: CANCELLED!" have they actually shown the offending images?

News to me.

so of course every idiot chud talking head is acting like the PC Police are going door to door to take "Cat in the Hat" away from you

soon the government will tell you what books you CAN buy!

People talking about diversity and inclusion.

WATCH: “It goes against OUR people and OUR culture.”

At a budget meeting Rep. @JerrySexton19 rips off the mask/hood and lashes out about having Diversity and Inclusion positions in state government, calling it “propaganda”. pic.twitter.com/4Vujz8oNF5

— The Tennessee Holler (@TheTNHoller) March 2, 2021

https://slate.com/culture/2021/03/space-jam-2-lola-bunny-redesign-reddit-pepe-le-pew.html
(Article transitions into weird fetish stuff halfway through.)

They did this with She-Ra having smaller boobs too.

incredible that Lola Bunny looked like that to start with, that's Jessica Rabbit levels of horny for a kid's cartoon

Same shit happening over the Diablo II remaster. Low-res player characters whose faces were barely visible back in 2000 are the hill some dickheads are willing to die on because the paladin is now clearly black and the amazon looks like a proper badass rather than a scantily clad nymph.

darkest response I saw to the new Lola Bunny was that this wasn't going to stop furries and the furry-adjacent from jerking it to her

Article transitions into weird fetish stuff halfway through

what a weird rabbit hole to go down

Tee-hee.

I wonder how many of these people also complained about Cuties

I know nothing matters, but there have to be a few conservatives at least slightly confused by the twin imperatives to lose their shit over both imaginary pedophiles and making cartoon characters less fuckable

These people definitely exist, all six of them.

McElligot's Pool

Is it as obscure as I Had Trouble in Getting to Solla Sollew?

I'm laughing my ass off at the sheer number of sad sacks crying over the loss of their favorite horny kid's cartoon characters

I never know how much of this is just trolling but it does seem like people are legitimately upset about this

Firt Mr. Potatohead's manhood was taken away and then their own.

wow that space jam article

once again i wish luke winkie's career had ended with the slideshow of the "40 hottest babes in tech" or whatever but there's impressive continuity from that to this

When we first met her, Lola was dressed in a pair of tight, thigh-hugging athletic shorts and a spunky crop top that accentuated her insane curves. She sauntered onto the basketball court shrouded in a burlesque silhouette, evoking a confused, hot shiver in 8 year olds around the country.

https://www.bbc.com/news/world-us-canada-56381862
Amazon removes a transphobic book; gets a letter from four U.S. senators.

Among other questions, they asked: "Is this action part of a broader campaign against conservative material and voices on Amazon's platforms?"

If you have a blue checkmark and you’re currently spreading obviously hoax screenshots meant to deliberately and maliciously defame me, now would be a good time for you to lawyer up, because I need a new truck and would love nothing more than for you to be forced to pay for it.

— Sean Davis (@seanmdav) March 13, 2021

Federalist guy is going to sue you for a zillion dollars because you posted the screenshot of his ‘mommy milky’ porn search.

Flags.

A helicopter flying over the neighbourhood

― Party With A Jagger Ban (dog latin)

Everyone hates this regardless of political alignment don't they?

haha losing it over mommy milky