Best post or thread on this list of awesome posts & threads neanderthal found

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Poll Closing Date: Wednesday, 22 July 2020 00:00 (in 1 week)

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this movie should be called "I WAS CUCKED BY A TEENAGE ROBOT!!!"

― lumen (esby), Thursday, June 18, 2020 9:31 PM bookmarkflaglink
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OFFICIAL WORLDWIDE !! COVID-19 IS OVER !! PARTY THREAD
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I think my favorite part of pizza is the cum

― lumen (esby), Wednesday, May 27, 2020 1:55 PM bookmarkflaglink
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the slaves trump would have owned also would have had covid!!!!!!!!!

― lumen (esby), Tuesday, May 19, 2020 2:27 PM bookmarkflaglink
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important not to forget this vital point and I can't believe ppl are disregarding it!!!!!

― lumen (esby), Tuesday, May 19, 2020 2:28 PM bookmarkflaglink
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Being a socialist, a radical, or an anarchist is not the same as 'bitching loudly on the internet every day'.
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undo/lift curse?
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one easy trick to end the nonstop overwrought political direness: ban the leftists

― lumen (esby), Saturday, April 11, 2020 5:15 PM bookmarkflaglink
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i agree we need more women here, I would like to tell them that their taste in music is wrong

― lumen (esby), Sunday, April 12, 2020 12:03 AM bookmarkflaglink
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hey comrades, how many millions of $ were we supposed to give to wealthy white brooklynites before we start saving all the marginalized and at risk ppl again? i forgot..

― lumen (esby), Tuesday, March 10, 2020 4:30 PM bookmarkflaglink
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IF YOU DO THAT YOU CONDONE MULTIPLE NOTORIOUS GENOCIDES BEEP BLOOP B ERNIE SANDERS BORP

― lumen (esby), Thursday, March 5, 2020 10:48 PM bookmarkflaglink
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should other people have different opinions?
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but let's hope CORONAVIRUS only kills the bad olds and not Bernie!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

― lumen (esby), Wednesday, February 26, 2020 9:54 PM bookmarkflaglink
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hot ppl are just better, sorry

― lumen (esby), Tuesday, February 11, 2020 1:49 PM bookmarkflaglink
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this board deserves so much more trolling than it gets tbh... y'all are, like, the bougiest ppl in the world

― lumen (esby), Tuesday, February 4, 2020 11:54 AM bookmarkflaglink
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Bernie saves woman's life by yelling at her
Bernie solves billionaires by yelling at them
Bernie fixes health care by yelling at it
Bernie escapes death's clutches by yelling at death
Bernie lifts off into space by yelling at the ground

― lumen (esby), Monday, January 27, 2020 3:53 PM bookmarkflaglink
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i feel like i have read this article a million times.

you surely have, it's pt. 34985859340293849494 in the 'men (bad) should be women (good)' series. there's nothing wrong with these kids. teenagers are horny??? men laugh at jokes their friends make instead of chastising them for being inappropriate???? my stars, it all just makes me want to cry

― lumen (esby), Monday, December 16, 2019 10:52 PM bookmarkflaglink
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• ^^ all these conservative opinions are boring
• trump is alive and he is your president and that's ok, having a decade long emotional response to this is nagl imo
• socialism is incel economics
• whoever said boomers and gen x are indistinguishable was otm you guys watch snl and listen to the eagles
• thank you for loving esby

― lumen (esby), Monday, November 18, 2019 4:11 PM bookmarkflaglink
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lol. a Fancy White in his 2nd year of college is what I meant yeah, but you know, whatever fills yr bag

― lumen (esby), Thursday, October 17, 2019 5:17 PM bookmarkflaglink
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don't worry, grampa's gonna start the revolution any day now and then it's off to the re-education camps for me

― lumen (esby), Thursday, October 17, 2019 7:30 PM bookmarkflaglink
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what is the most woke body of water?
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so when trump wins reëlection and the civil war starts are y'all actually gonna take up arms and fight or are you just going to post the same horseshit here for yet another 4 years?
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TRUMP
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I mean it’s also the progressive version of owning the libs

― Larry Elleison (rogermexico.), Friday, September 20, 2019 5:45 PM (one hour ago) bookmarkflaglink

once again i ask: what exactly is it you guys think you do here all day?

― lumen (esby), Friday, September 20, 2019 9:09 PM bookmarkflaglink
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change thread title to 'Rutger Hauer is a DEAD'

― lumen (esby), Wednesday, July 24, 2019 3:02 PM bookmarkflaglink
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from the "Homophobia - Why?" thread:

str8 so apols for the ignorance but... what, exactly, do you guys do with the jizzboards

― lumen (esby), Monday, July 15, 2019 3:51 PM bookmarkflaglink
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there is one alternate universe out of billions where ivanka is a really cool and nice person despite her upbringing, and i feel sorry for her because she's placed in these insane situations where she has be around political leaders and pretend like she belongs. must be excruciating for her, in that alternative universe. in this one, though, she fakes it til she makes it and later is like 'i architected the fuck out of that greet and meet, j kush'

― i will never make a typo ever again (Karl Malone), Sunday, June 30, 2019 12:17 PM bookmarkflaglink

i guess she'll just have to settle for this universe, where she's smoking hot and her dad is the president :(

― lumen (esby), Sunday, June 30, 2019 12:23 PM bookmarkflaglink

Time4FiftyOne

― Got your butt drank (Neanderthal), Sunday, June 30, 2019 12:57 PM bookmarkflaglink
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esby's not so much out-of-bounds as just annoying and inane. it would be like killing a flea.

― A is for (Aimless), Sunday, June 30, 2019 1:06 PM bookmarkflaglink

annoying and inane

Oh, and I forgot to say "pointless and without redeeming value".

― A is for (Aimless), Sunday, June 30, 2019 1:08 PM bookmarkflaglink

go screw, you dusty farmer's almanac

― lumen (esby), Sunday, June 30, 2019 1:13 PM bookmarkflaglink
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all 'indie' music is just an absolute affront

― lumen (esby), Thursday, May 30, 2019 6:53 PM bookmarkflaglink

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can you imagine being a normie, just making blithe observations about trump then going on to discuss pop culture? leaving us ilxors have to fight the war against trump w. hitler on our own, one chapo ep at a time? beyond fucked.

― lumen (esby), Friday, May 10, 2019 3:56 PM bookmarkflaglink

1) CUCKED BY A TEENAGE ROBOT
2) WE MADE IT FAM
3) PIZZA OPINION
4) IF TRUMP DID IT
5) NEVER FORGET
6) I THINK YOU ALSO HAVE TO READ A PAMPHLET?
7) TECH SUPPORT FOR BIDEN THREAD
8) AM I WRONG THO
9) ALSO SMILE
10) MORE LIKE CHAPO PENTHOUSE
11) BERNIE BOT'S BIG DAY
12) STILL NOT SORTED
13) HOPE HE'S YELLING INTO A MASK
14) TOO EDGY 4 U
15) CONSPICUOUS USE OF 'BOUGIE'
16) CAREER POLITICIAN
17) LAY OFF THE KIDS
18) BOOMERS VS GEN X
19) SEXY BERNIE BRO
20) ALL THESE CHALLOPS, LIKE TEARS IN THE RAIN
21) LAKE TITICACA
22) RËËLËCTION
23) 45
24) THE PROGRESSIVE VERSION OF OWNING THE... REPS?
25) ADMITTEDLY PRETTY BAD
26) WHAT DO THEY DO WITH THE JIZZBOARDS
27) SHE'LL JUST HAVE TO SETTLE
28) OLD MR. CRICKET IS CHIRPING
29) THE TRUTH ABOUT INDIE ROCK
30) CAN YOU IMAGINE


lumen (esby), Tuesday, 30 June 2020 04:47 (one week ago) link

"having a decade long emotional response" is p good lol

below the mendoza (rip van wanko), Tuesday, 30 June 2020 11:31 (one week ago) link

Bitching loudly on the Internet

Feel a million filaments (Sund4r), Tuesday, 30 June 2020 14:00 (one week ago) link

career politician

imago, Tuesday, 30 June 2020 14:08 (one week ago) link

all 'indie' music is just an absolute affront

― lumen (esby), Thursday, May 30, 2019 6:53 PM bookmarkflaglink

This one's confusing me because I'm not sure what it's supposed to be indicative of? esby's contempt for 'indie', a musical genre favoured by ILXors? Or esby parodying the kneejerk contempt of ILXors for 'indie', a musical genre favoured by esby? Having heard esby's own music, I can only assume it's the latter.

Future England Captain (Tom D.), Tuesday, 30 June 2020 14:14 (one week ago) link

esby's own music is, as far as we know, psych-rock/kosmische

imago, Tuesday, 30 June 2020 14:16 (one week ago) link

Exactly, indie.

Future England Captain (Tom D.), Tuesday, 30 June 2020 14:17 (one week ago) link

Bougiest ppl, because deep down you know it’s true.

pomenitul, Tuesday, 30 June 2020 14:18 (one week ago) link

I'm sensing a pattern here.

Future England Captain (Tom D.), Tuesday, 30 June 2020 14:18 (one week ago) link

tbf he is mostly looking for a rise (and often getting one), it is a legitimate posting style albeit an unfashionable one

imago, Tuesday, 30 June 2020 14:18 (one week ago) link

It's strange to spend 15 years (allegedly) doing it though.

Future England Captain (Tom D.), Tuesday, 30 June 2020 14:19 (one week ago) link

A true Romantic, out of step with his era.

pomenitul, Tuesday, 30 June 2020 14:20 (one week ago) link

No, that's Morbz.

Future England Captain (Tom D.), Tuesday, 30 June 2020 14:21 (one week ago) link

distinctive posting style, sometimes amusing, and i support respectful iconoclasm on ilx B+

Mordy, Tuesday, 30 June 2020 14:21 (one week ago) link

this is a heroic thread and it's the way it needs to be done. always fight back. don't give up an inch. and if they're right about you, doesn't matter -- give em even less.

treeship., Tuesday, 30 June 2020 14:22 (one week ago) link

What’s an ‘esby’ anyway?

pomenitul, Tuesday, 30 June 2020 14:23 (one week ago) link

it's a pun on suggest ban

specific fry such as scampo (||||||||), Tuesday, 30 June 2020 14:23 (one week ago) link

it's a slant homonym for aspie

Mordy, Tuesday, 30 June 2020 14:24 (one week ago) link

an 'esby' is someone who knows what it takes

treeship., Tuesday, 30 June 2020 14:24 (one week ago) link

Context for 'indie' post was afaict esby agreeing with other posters who were bashing the National and Vampire Weekend on a thread dedicated to complaining about music you don't like.

Feel a million filaments (Sund4r), Tuesday, 30 June 2020 14:25 (one week ago) link

So maybe it's fake corporate indie he's objecting to, sellouts!

Future England Captain (Tom D.), Tuesday, 30 June 2020 14:27 (one week ago) link

this is the correct response to someone cataloguing your posts and then dumping them to try and discredit you

Mordy, Tuesday, 30 June 2020 14:27 (one week ago) link

it is. i was sort of being facetious before, but i am genuinely disgusted with the whole moralizing schtick of digging up past posts or tweets or whatever.

treeship., Tuesday, 30 June 2020 14:28 (one week ago) link

and i'm glad esby isn't giving in.

treeship., Tuesday, 30 June 2020 14:29 (one week ago) link

this is the correct response to someone cataloguing your posts and then dumping them to try and discredit you

I agree 100%, even though I think there's nothing there to discredit.

Future England Captain (Tom D.), Tuesday, 30 June 2020 14:30 (one week ago) link

this is a heroic thread and it's the way it needs to be done. always fight back. don't give up an inch. and if they're right about you, doesn't matter -- give em even less.

― treeship., Tuesday, June 30, 2020 4:22 PM (thirteen minutes ago) bookmarkflaglink

https://i.chzbgr.com/full/7014351104/h2D1CA551/still-not-sure-if-trolling-or-serious

Scampidocio (Le Bateau Ivre), Tuesday, 30 June 2020 14:37 (one week ago) link

never trolling. always rolling.

treeship., Tuesday, 30 June 2020 14:43 (one week ago) link

the high tolerance this board has for "iconoclasts" or whatever is prob what's going to contribute to me leaving one day

mellon collie and the infinite bradness (BradNelson), Tuesday, 30 June 2020 14:47 (one week ago) link

it's a pun on suggest ban


It’s a double ref to suggest ban and his old username sleepingbag and all his posts are lame and unfunny this is all basic stuff guys read the faq

Keir’d flex (wins), Tuesday, 30 June 2020 14:54 (one week ago) link

Ftr, he made a mildly (and imo totally justified) snarky comment in response to someone acting like the far-from-uncontroversial neologism BIPOC has been universally known for years, at which point other posters who hadn't even been contributing to the discussion jumped in to turn the rolling race thread into a crusade against an individual poster, in part by digging up and compiling a bunch of his goofy posts without context. I'm having trouble seeing esby as the troll here.

Feel a million filaments (Sund4r), Tuesday, 30 June 2020 14:58 (one week ago) link

So 15 years of smirking supercilious garbage with all depth of a puddle expressly designed to irritate other people doesn't register as trolling to you?

Future England Captain (Tom D.), Tuesday, 30 June 2020 15:01 (one week ago) link

does he post other stuff too?

treeship., Tuesday, 30 June 2020 15:01 (one week ago) link

tom d blatantly trying for new board description rec

oscar bravo, Tuesday, 30 June 2020 15:02 (one week ago) link

All I can say is you North American ILXors are too nice for your own good. I shudder to think what the likes of calzino or NV would do to esby if he ever tried butting heads with them.

Future England Captain (Tom D.), Tuesday, 30 June 2020 15:04 (one week ago) link

15 years of posting suggests he wouldn't care

oscar bravo, Tuesday, 30 June 2020 15:05 (one week ago) link

probably curse a bunch and call him a centrist melt or something?

Mordy, Tuesday, 30 June 2020 15:06 (one week ago) link

I have no idea what his politics actually are beyond pwning libtards.

Future England Captain (Tom D.), Tuesday, 30 June 2020 15:06 (one week ago) link

15 years of posting suggests he wouldn't care

― oscar bravo, Tuesday, June 30, 2020 5:05 PM (thirty-one seconds ago) bookmarkflaglink

Au contraire. To stick around for 15 years is to care deeply. #controp

Scampidocio (Le Bateau Ivre), Tuesday, 30 June 2020 15:06 (one week ago) link

Why do you post here

― El Tomboto, Sunday, October 15, 2017 12:20 PM

bc i love everything

― sleepingbag, Sunday, October 15, 2017 2:27 PM

I have to admit my respect for this riposte

― El Tomboto, Sunday, October 15, 2017 1:34 PM (two years ago) bookmarkflaglink

lumen (esby), Tuesday, 30 June 2020 15:09 (one week ago) link

No, most of what is compiled here does not register as trolling to me.

Feel a million filaments (Sund4r), Tuesday, 30 June 2020 15:10 (one week ago) link

if it is, it's very low level. nothing quoted there is "over the line."

it is, i admit, kind of odd that he has kept up this lightly mischievous schtick for so long without getting bored. but you know, great performance art is often about endurance.

treeship., Tuesday, 30 June 2020 15:11 (one week ago) link

And, yeah, he does contribute productively to IMM. xp

Feel a million filaments (Sund4r), Tuesday, 30 June 2020 15:12 (one week ago) link

Glad to hear it.

Future England Captain (Tom D.), Tuesday, 30 June 2020 15:14 (one week ago) link

I mean he definitely dropped the act when he got praised for his contribution to the last ILX comp., he couldn't do anything else because people were being nice to him because people are nice.

Future England Captain (Tom D.), Tuesday, 30 June 2020 15:16 (one week ago) link

maybe the problem is everyone else here is a jerk

treeship., Tuesday, 30 June 2020 15:17 (one week ago) link

Everyone is sometimes.

Future England Captain (Tom D.), Tuesday, 30 June 2020 15:19 (one week ago) link

I mean he definitely dropped the act when he got praised for his contribution to the last ILX comp., he couldn't do anything else because people were being nice to him because people are nice.

What lesson do we take from this?

Feel a million filaments (Sund4r), Tuesday, 30 June 2020 15:36 (one week ago) link

That even woke libtards can be nice people?

Future England Captain (Tom D.), Tuesday, 30 June 2020 15:39 (one week ago) link

you are all nice people! thank you guys :)

distinctive posting style, sometimes amusing, and i support respectful iconoclasm on ilx B+

― Mordy, Tuesday, June 30, 2020 8:21 AM (two hours ago) bookmarkflaglink

about the best i could have hoped for

this is a heroic thread

― treeship., Tuesday, June 30, 2020 8:22 AM (two hours ago) bookmarkflaglink

it really is

What’s an ‘esby’ anyway?

― pomenitul, Tuesday, June 30, 2020 8:23 AM (one hour ago) bookmarkflaglink

thank you for loving esby

lumen (esby), Tuesday, 30 June 2020 16:25 (one week ago) link

this poll closes on july 22, my 35th birthday, and is my present to myself lol :) at that point i will have indeed been here for about 15 years! since 2006. how did you all know?

fwiw i don't think my posting style here is thaaaaat different from how i am irl tbh? i mean i don't think anything here is really that edgy, certainly not malicious and that's not my intention here or irl, i do make a lot of jokes and look for weird angles on things and tbh i have grown to become very thankful that i often perceive things very differently from those around me. also, i don't do much writing irl + i like the formatting options ilx provides. there should be more fun polls and threads. i feel like it used to not be a big deal to start a thread on ilx and there were a lot of toss offs and goofy convos, and now everything is like 'rolling whatever megathread'. mmmm.

also, it's not a total mystery to me why some of you strongly dislike me lol; i've called aimless a 'chode' and a mansplainer, wins something like a 'wily cockface' and i said his puns were bad, old lunch i've said is a bad poster many times and i stand by that, and neanderthal... well it kind of feels like when the kid keeps running full speed into the bully's fist and the bully is like 'kid! what are you doing? go home!' i suppose i can apologize for these things as they stick out in my mind as mostly unwarranted! sorry folks!

also i do want to thank neanderthal for digging through all the garbage and horseshit and literal racism and sexism in my post history to assemble this hilarious curation, kudos and thank you

lumen (esby), Tuesday, 30 June 2020 17:22 (one week ago) link

tbh this is the first time I have noticed esby.

Yerac, Tuesday, 30 June 2020 17:41 (one week ago) link

thank you for noticing esby

rob, Tuesday, 30 June 2020 17:42 (one week ago) link

lol

Future England Captain (Tom D.), Tuesday, 30 June 2020 17:43 (one week ago) link

if challenging bougie message board people to think critically about the linguistic violence of neologisms like 'BIPOC' was a sport, then esby could be nominated for an ESPY Award

the burrito that defined a generation, Tuesday, 30 June 2020 17:52 (one week ago) link

if assholes could fly...

below the mendoza (rip van wanko), Tuesday, 30 June 2020 18:01 (one week ago) link

tbh this is the first time I have noticed esby.
― Yerac, Tuesday, June 30, 2020 5:41 PM (four hours ago) bookmarkflaglink

otm. just let ppl post imo

specific fry such as scampo (||||||||), Tuesday, 30 June 2020 22:18 (one week ago) link

This guy is one of only three people I've ever fped and I'm looking to go 3 for 3. Mind boggling he could be 35.

Tōne Locatelli Romano (PBKR), Tuesday, 30 June 2020 22:41 (one week ago) link

Thank you for FPing esby

Future England Captain (Tom D.), Tuesday, 30 June 2020 22:47 (one week ago) link

lol

Tōne Locatelli Romano (PBKR), Tuesday, 30 June 2020 22:53 (one week ago) link

grady and max basically spent an entire Monday afternoon basically digging up 5 year old posts of mine under another nickname to dogpile me, even breaking the 77 rule, and a whopping 3 people came to my defense. I was basically told "hey you shouldn't have said it if you didn't want it to be used against you later".

peace_man, who I like and respect, insinuated we were dogpiling him for no reason, i pointed out "no, he asks for it and enjoys the attention". It was the wrong thread to do it on, completely, and for that part I'm sorry, but don't act as if I wasn't part of the convo other than to dunk on esby. I was one of the first to reply to flopson re: BIPOC, and I was reading the thread because it was genuinely something I was confused on, then he dropped the line "what do you people do all day" and suggested BIPOC was a flash in the pan term that won't be used in a few years, so naturally we got annoyed.

Lol @ acting like anybody's past is being dug into here, searching for posts by user is literally a feature of the board. Not like I scoured BBS posts from him from 1993 or posted his yearbook pic

I hear that sometimes Satan wants to defund police (Neanderthal), Tuesday, 30 June 2020 23:05 (one week ago) link

thank you for doxxing esby

below the mendoza (rip van wanko), Tuesday, 30 June 2020 23:51 (one week ago) link

I'm sorry for not giving credit that you were already part of the discussion, Neanderthal. I shouldn't have overlooked you there. Idk when the thing with max and grady happened but it sounds bad; board has been a lot nastier in the past and I wouldn't let something like that go if I saw it now, unless it was provoked by something like hate speech or harassment of individual posters. I'll stand by a lot of what I said; the idea that "BIPOC" is a problematic term that could or should be a flash in the pan seems valid to me.

Feel a million filaments (Sund4r), Wednesday, 1 July 2020 03:39 (one week ago) link

Why?

shout-out to his family (DJP), Wednesday, 1 July 2020 13:49 (one week ago) link

How is it problematic, who is it hurting, and why does it matter if it becomes a part of the mainstream lexicon or doesn't?

shout-out to his family (DJP), Wednesday, 1 July 2020 13:50 (one week ago) link

Obviously it matters to the people who are pushing it. Even ilxors were far from achieving consensus on the utility or even the meaning of the term, and lots of these terms do get outdated quickly, so I don't think it's an invalid troll opinion.

My own opinion is that it is overly specific to the US context and inappropriate to the historical and social context of other countries, without indicating this in the term itself (in the way that, say, "African-American" does); even within the US context, I am suspicious of the need to establish some quasi-hierarchy among people of colour every time people of colour are referred to as a group. (We already have simple and clear words we can use when we want to talk about issues that specifically impact or concern black or indigenous people.) There might be some context where it is appropriate but I'm not convinced of replacing "POC" (which I already like less than "non-white" or "visible minority" for the reason I gave on the race thread) with this term, which is what some people seem to want to do.

Feel a million filaments (Sund4r), Wednesday, 1 July 2020 14:14 (one week ago) link

I thought it was only being used in the US anyway? Or North America? No point in using it in the UK or Europe for instance.

Future England Captain (Tom D.), Wednesday, 1 July 2020 14:16 (one week ago) link

We don't use POC over here anyway.

Future England Captain (Tom D.), Wednesday, 1 July 2020 14:17 (one week ago) link

It's definitely being used in Canada, where I don't think it works the same way as in the US.

https://twitter.com/bipocpub
https://www.bipoctvandfilm.com
https://www.writersunion.ca/bipoc-writers-connect

Feel a million filaments (Sund4r), Wednesday, 1 July 2020 14:30 (one week ago) link

That's why I said North America.

Future England Captain (Tom D.), Wednesday, 1 July 2020 14:32 (one week ago) link

OK?

Feel a million filaments (Sund4r), Wednesday, 1 July 2020 14:34 (one week ago) link

On the internet, no one knows you’re not an American.

pomenitul, Wednesday, 1 July 2020 14:37 (one week ago) link

People who have no stakes in the argument should stfu is how I roll.

Tōne Locatelli Romano (PBKR), Wednesday, 1 July 2020 22:27 (one week ago) link

lol sometimes people complain about "woke" language purely for stylistic concerns

i have no scampo and i must scream (Noodle Vague), Wednesday, 1 July 2020 22:31 (one week ago) link

My reasons were not stylistic and I do have stakes.

Feel a million filaments (Sund4r), Wednesday, 1 July 2020 22:38 (one week ago) link


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