love* in the time of plague (and by love* i mean brexit* and other dreary matters of uk politics)

will be going to troon beach at the weekend lads and using the 'testing my eyesight' exception

So he isn’t going along with the autistic child bit? Disappointing

that was a pure fabrication

xp Troon is good, full support

I know it was but I don’t see why he wouldn’t go with it

lmao finally someone has told him he's at it

she didn’t have coronavirus symptoms so I chose to drive hundreds of miles? what

You can see why Laura K and Pesto went first.

Hearing "Walk in the Black Forest" playing in my head now.

the man from the Mail is telling us what tomorrow's going to look like

"they think we're mugs"

now this is rope-a-dope

So little Timmy managed to travel 240 miles to Durham without needing a piss but couldn't keep it in during the 30 mile trip to save Dom's eyesight?

Jesus I didn’t clock he was from the Mail! He must be delighted with these answers.

Yesss please continue getting testy

actually didn't think his statement was all that bad, some continuity issues and plot holes which mean it probably wouldn't have gotten out of any writers room... but taking questions has definitely been a mistake, has made him look more weaselly

When challenged over his decision not to speak to the prime minister before driving to Durham, he said he wanted to protect Boris Johnson’s time.

'the reason i didn't ask you if i could play the xbox is because i didn't want to bother you, daddy'

the statement would probably have done the job on Friday night, but he can't see himself as accountable

he should've stayed in durham. the advice was stay home, work remotely if you can. no reason why he could not have worked remotely for a week or two

he's been having weird visions tho.

"let's whizz down the road and see how we feel"

my vision was weird, i thought I should drive for half an hour

seems sensible, definitely not extremely dangerous

.. with a four year old child in the back seat.

Why didn't his wife drive the car back to London?

I've had a bottle of wine, not sure I'm fit to drive, let's test it out with a 30 mile drive

"If you think my eyesight's bad, oy!"

this last journo has murdered him lol

the safest thing to do was to drive hundreds of miles to put some teenagers’ lives at risk

Boris listened to this shite yesterday and still decided to stick by him?

Strangely enough he drives a car that only needs petrol when the driver is feeling fine.

That's smart techonology!

can cars do 500 miles on one tank of petrol

HE'S JUST ADMITTED HE STOPPED

that was cross at him sorry xpost

credit to everyone except bbclaurak and pesto for at least trying to ask decent questions, what a fucking embarrassment those two are

they really are, not a 'who did and knew what, where and when' between them

the best thing to do would be to expose a 17 year old girl to the virus through my son, it just makes sense

He hasn't got any friends duh!

I couldn’t expose a friend, but i would expose my teenage niece

Daily Mail comments raging

Dominic Cummings REFUSES to apologise and has NOT offered to resign for breaking lockdown to drive 260 miles to Durham without PM's permission - despite admitting he DID go to bluebell woods and Barnard Castle to 'check if he felt better'

is this the cartoonist matt

most riveting press conference since the atherton ball tampering one is this, he wins - i can't watch any more!

Constant media blaming, it's all your fault

Literally the only thing the media might have got wrong is him going back to Durham, he's admitted to everything else they said.

Someone needs to ask him if the govt guidelines were unclear, seeing as how everyone interpreted them differently to him

(xp) Can someone please point that out to this cunt.

yes, people were being fined and turned back from driving to holiday homes. how was that any different?

did the 'exceptional circumstances' clause exist? have they retconned it?

Oh, I forgot about his house in London being under siege from violent pitchfork-wielding mobs.

4 hour drive with a 4 year old and no stops... is straining the credibility of his story a little

from what i've seen on twitter (sorry) the exceptional guidelines were intended to allow for ways of dealing with domestic violence and sexual abuse.