Least promising Sequel/Remake/Franchise Flick of 2020

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As we are all aware from months of breathless anticipation, the latest reboot of the The Grudge series opens in North America tomorrow, thus kicking off another year of dead-horse-beating from the Hollywood dream factory. Which of these titles makes you most want to stay home in 2020?

As always, I am drawing upon [url=https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_American_films_of_2020]Wikipedia[/i] for information, so releases and titles are subject to change and all that. With adaptations of novels that had previously been filmed, I had to make some pretty judgement calls, so by my arbitrary calculus, Netflix's latest go at Rebecca isn't here, but The Invisible Man is--my rationale being that one is a fresh take on Daphne DuMaurier's novel, while the other is an attempt to restart Universal's doomed classic monster franchise. Make sense? We can argue about all that in the thread.

Poll Results

OptionVotes
Ghostbusters: Afterlife 8
Dolittle 5
Scoob! 5
Morbius 5
Sonic the Hedgehog 4
Minions: The Rise of Gru 4
Bad Boys for Life 4
Mulan 3
Trolls World Tour 2
Tom and Jerry 2
Top Gun: Maverick 2
The Conjuring: The Devil Made Me Do It 1
The King's Man 1
Bob's Burgers: The Movie 1
Impractical Jokers: The Movie 1
No Time to Die 1
Peter Rabbit 2: The Runaway 1
A Quiet Place: Part II 1
Candyman 1
The Hitman's Wife's Bodyguard 1
Halloween Kills 1
The Grudge 1
Godzilla vs. Kong 1
Coming 2 America 1
Fast & Furious 9 1
Fantasy Island 1
The Croods 2 1
Venom 2 1
Brahms: The Boy II 1
The SpongeBob Movie: Sponge on the Run 0
West Side Story 0
The Purge 5 0
Bill & Ted Face the Music 0
Birds of Prey 0
P.S. I Still Love You 0
The New Mutants 0
Black Widow 0
The Invisible Man 0
The Eternals 0
Escape Room 2 0
Wonder Woman 1984 0


Maria Edgelord (cryptosicko), Thursday, 2 January 2020 18:03 (three weeks ago) link

Such a depressingly dire pile of cinematic barf.

Drive Like a Demon From Steakhouse to Steakhouse (Old Lunch), Thursday, 2 January 2020 18:05 (three weeks ago) link

Fantasy Island is probably the one of these whose existence is most baffling, but the Disney live action bonanza remains the biggest cinematic nuisance of recent years, so I'll go with Mulan.

Maria Edgelord (cryptosicko), Thursday, 2 January 2020 18:07 (three weeks ago) link

i believe bill & ted and the candyman remake will be good, or at least not abominations

american bradass (BradNelson), Thursday, 2 January 2020 18:08 (three weeks ago) link

i am very excited for venom 2, the sequel to the only good superhero movie

american bradass (BradNelson), Thursday, 2 January 2020 18:08 (three weeks ago) link

voted ghostbusters in a heartbeat

bold caucasian eroticism (Simon H.), Thursday, 2 January 2020 18:09 (three weeks ago) link

The Conjuring: The Devil Made Me Do It

i'm voting for this, there are way too fucking many of these movies

american bradass (BradNelson), Thursday, 2 January 2020 18:09 (three weeks ago) link

i can't believe they're rebooting the grudge what the hell

american bradass (BradNelson), Thursday, 2 January 2020 18:10 (three weeks ago) link

runner up vote to Trolls World Tour, the preview for which was somehow the most horrific element of my Cats screening

bold caucasian eroticism (Simon H.), Thursday, 2 January 2020 18:11 (three weeks ago) link

but as with the candyman remake i looked at who was involved and now i'm like.... maybe it'll be good. andrea riseborough!

xp

american bradass (BradNelson), Thursday, 2 January 2020 18:12 (three weeks ago) link

Bad Boys II is the worst film ever made, so

mfktz (Camaraderie at Arms Length), Thursday, 2 January 2020 18:16 (three weeks ago) link

the Disney live action bonanza remains the biggest cinematic nuisance of recent years, so I'll go with Mulan.

― Maria Edgelord (cryptosicko), Thursday, January 2, 2020 12:07 PM (six minutes ago) bookmarkflaglink

I have a feeling that this will be the Solo that makes them think twice about the path they're hurtling down so recklessly. Wouldn't be at all surprised if they cease preproduction altogether on the live-action remakes of Brother Bear and Meet the Robinsons.

Drive Like a Demon From Steakhouse to Steakhouse (Old Lunch), Thursday, 2 January 2020 18:17 (three weeks ago) link

as with the candyman remake i looked at who was involved and now i'm like.... maybe it'll be good. andrea riseborough!

I made this mistake with Pet Semetary, right down to getting excited about the lead actress. not doing it again

bold caucasian eroticism (Simon H.), Thursday, 2 January 2020 18:18 (three weeks ago) link

I have crossed-finger hopes for Bill & Ted Face the Music, The New Mutants, Peter Rabbit 2: The Runaway, Scoob!, and The SpongeBob Movie: Sponge on the Run.

Don't care a lick about any of the others, but reserve special antipathy for Ghostbusters: Afterlife, which just please stop making Ghostbusters films that aren't the original team!

https://i.ytimg.com/vi/iSj1ooBM3P0/hqdefault.jpg

☮️ (peace, man), Thursday, 2 January 2020 18:19 (three weeks ago) link

Dolittle

... actually, this one

american bradass (BradNelson), Thursday, 2 January 2020 18:25 (three weeks ago) link

The second most horrific trailer in front of Cats, though the fact that I'd seen it already dulled the impact

bold caucasian eroticism (Simon H.), Thursday, 2 January 2020 18:26 (three weeks ago) link

Yeah, I saw a trailer for that last week. It looked pretty dire.

☮️ (peace, man), Thursday, 2 January 2020 18:27 (three weeks ago) link

Feels like we've reached the point where there's no real interest on the part of many rightsholders in whether people are asking for a particular sequel or remake or adaptation. Just like 'shit, this goddamn Cookie Crisp IP is just sitting here gathering dust, let's get those 'Johnny Johnny Yes Papa' fuckers from the YouTubes to blast a feature-length CGI dook for us'.

Drive Like a Demon From Steakhouse to Steakhouse (Old Lunch), Thursday, 2 January 2020 18:27 (three weeks ago) link

wow the dolittle trailer starts off with a moody cover of "what a wonderful world" lmao i hate music AND movies

american bradass (BradNelson), Thursday, 2 January 2020 18:29 (three weeks ago) link

Dolittle will at least produce some amusing behind-the-scenes fodder, given how cursed its production has supposedly been

bold caucasian eroticism (Simon H.), Thursday, 2 January 2020 18:29 (three weeks ago) link

Dolittle feels very much like Downey asking himself the question 'what kind of bullshit would I be doing right now if my career hadn't been miraculously revived a decade back?'

Drive Like a Demon From Steakhouse to Steakhouse (Old Lunch), Thursday, 2 January 2020 18:30 (three weeks ago) link

He has to be rich as hell rn. I just...don't understand it. At all.

Drive Like a Demon From Steakhouse to Steakhouse (Old Lunch), Thursday, 2 January 2020 18:31 (three weeks ago) link

I may have said this elsewhere but it's incredible the extent to which it feels like one of the fake trailers from Tropic Thunder, right down to the dodgy accent.

bold caucasian eroticism (Simon H.), Thursday, 2 January 2020 18:31 (three weeks ago) link

I like how off-the-wall some of these titles are if you don't know the original, e.g. Brahms: The Boy II, The Hitman's Wife's Bodyguard

jmm, Thursday, 2 January 2020 18:34 (three weeks ago) link

i have voluntarily seen the boy twice and not even i noticed that a sequel was on this list. v excited for whatever absolute garbage it is though

american bradass (BradNelson), Thursday, 2 January 2020 18:36 (three weeks ago) link

XPS RDJ has gone full Dolittle. You don't go full Dolittle.

a bevy of supermodels, musicians and Lena Dunham (C. Grisso/McCain), Thursday, 2 January 2020 18:38 (three weeks ago) link

Predict ppl will find it hard to resist voting for morbius

Baby yoda laid an egg (wins), Thursday, 2 January 2020 18:59 (three weeks ago) link

katie holmes apparently stars in brahms: the boy ii, so i will be there opening night

american bradass (BradNelson), Thursday, 2 January 2020 19:00 (three weeks ago) link

The trailer for Scoob! implies that Scooby-Doo is named after Scooby Snacks and not the other way round, which is infuriating

Swilling Ambergris, Esq. (silby), Thursday, 2 January 2020 19:03 (three weeks ago) link

I have no idea what The Boy is. I had to read a bit of the entry on The Hitman's Wife's Bodyguard a bit before including it; The Hitman's Bodyguard sounded vaguely like something I remembered existing, but I couldn't be sure.

Maria Edgelord (cryptosicko), Thursday, 2 January 2020 19:07 (three weeks ago) link

I expect to like West Side Story.

temporarily embarrassed thousandaire (Eric H.), Thursday, 2 January 2020 19:08 (three weeks ago) link

The existence of Morbius is stupid as hell but brace yourself for Sony's future forays into even stupider and more pointless adaptations of tertiary Spider-Man characters.

Drive Like a Demon From Steakhouse to Steakhouse (Old Lunch), Thursday, 2 January 2020 19:11 (three weeks ago) link

The trailer for Scoob! implies that Scooby-Doo is named after Scooby Snacks and not the other way round, which is infuriating

― Swilling Ambergris, Esq. (silby), Thursday, January 2, 2020 1:03 PM (seven minutes ago) bookmarkflaglink

Particularly if the movie fails to identify them as Scoobert Snacks.

Drive Like a Demon From Steakhouse to Steakhouse (Old Lunch), Thursday, 2 January 2020 19:12 (three weeks ago) link

Based on the trailer, I've got less than zero anticipation of Ghostbusters: Afterlife.

temporarily embarrassed thousandaire (Eric H.), Thursday, 2 January 2020 19:13 (three weeks ago) link

Bill & ted seems to be the one that the most ppl have decided they need to believe will be good; I’ll be pretty surprised if it is, but that goes for most of these

Baby yoda laid an egg (wins), Thursday, 2 January 2020 19:16 (three weeks ago) link

this is the only morbius I know about

http://www.doctorwhotv.co.uk/wp-content/uploads/The-Brain-of-Morbius.jpg

mfktz (Camaraderie at Arms Length), Thursday, 2 January 2020 19:20 (three weeks ago) link

xp: yeah to clarify I will be surprised if the new Bill & Ted is any good, but I do want it to be.

☮️ (peace, man), Thursday, 2 January 2020 19:22 (three weeks ago) link

same

bold caucasian eroticism (Simon H.), Thursday, 2 January 2020 19:25 (three weeks ago) link

the old ones are bad

Οὖτις, Thursday, 2 January 2020 19:27 (three weeks ago) link

Me being me, I'm hesitantly excited for Black Widow and Eternals but the MCU thus far was wrapped up in a perfectly satisfactory fashion and I've come to accept that the endeavor can't be maintained forever so I'm happy to move on if subsequent entries turf out.

Literally not one single other thing on this list that conjures more than a 'maybe I'll watch that 5-10 years from now if I happen upon it while flipping through channels' from me.

Drive Like a Demon From Steakhouse to Steakhouse (Old Lunch), Thursday, 2 January 2020 19:27 (three weeks ago) link

I mean I want to like them/indulge my fond memories but I tried rewatching the first one recently and it's just not well made, the jokes are clumsy and very obvious etc

xp

Οὖτις, Thursday, 2 January 2020 19:28 (three weeks ago) link

Have ppl noticed the same amount of goodwill/benefit of doubt against the odds for coming 2 America?

Baby yoda laid an egg (wins), Thursday, 2 January 2020 19:28 (three weeks ago) link

if you're not excited for the croods 2 i dunno what to tell you

ciderpress, Thursday, 2 January 2020 19:29 (three weeks ago) link

the only one of these I'm remotely interested in seeing is Wonder Woman tbh

worst is def Top Gun

Οὖτις, Thursday, 2 January 2020 19:29 (three weeks ago) link

Is The Hitman's Bodyguard that Samuel Jackson/Ryan Reynolds flick? If so, I remember it getting very good word of mouth but barely managing 45 minutes of it before turning it off

groovypanda, Thursday, 2 January 2020 19:32 (three weeks ago) link

The ones I have least animus towards are the 9th sequels to cheap horror properties cause they’re just part of the genre and although rooted in the same kind of cynicism are less grotesque to me than the megabudget monstrosities

Baby yoda laid an egg (wins), Thursday, 2 January 2020 19:34 (three weeks ago) link

I feel like we've had the notion of Top Gun as a pop classic imposed upon us because I don't know that I've ever heard anyone talk about it in glowing terms or cite it among their faves of the era or, like, anything. It's cited ironically quite a bit and that's about it. It's just a thing whose existence people are aware of without having anyone having actual feelings about that awareness. It's the deviled ham of film.

Drive Like a Demon From Steakhouse to Steakhouse (Old Lunch), Thursday, 2 January 2020 19:35 (three weeks ago) link

I know top gun stans (my sister for one, in the 90s anyway)

Baby yoda laid an egg (wins), Thursday, 2 January 2020 19:36 (three weeks ago) link

Bill & Ted 3 is pretty much guaranteed to flop which is why I suspect it'll actually be pretty good

last saw the original about 8 years ago, idk I still think it's got some pretty funny bits. 2nd obviously isn't as good but I give 'em credit for doing something adventurous and weird. comedy in general just doesn't age well. maybe I should take this to the challop thread but I bet if you showed Airplane to a 17 year old today they'd probably say something like, "this sucks"

frogbs, Thursday, 2 January 2020 19:40 (three weeks ago) link

i didn't see airplane! for the first time until maybe eight years ago and few things have made me laugh more but i know that's not the same thing

american bradass (BradNelson), Thursday, 2 January 2020 19:43 (three weeks ago) link

Who ya gonna call

papa stank (Neanderthal), Thursday, 16 January 2020 00:20 (one week ago) link

mainstream american movies had a good run. but now it's gone the way of top 40 radio.

wasdnuos (abanana), Thursday, 16 January 2020 07:52 (one week ago) link

Movies are in the gutter

papa stank (Neanderthal), Thursday, 16 January 2020 07:57 (one week ago) link

My reflexive vote for bond could maybe have been better used but i) bond is shit ii) it can count as a vote for the bourne tv show also

Baby yoda laid an egg (wins), Thursday, 16 January 2020 12:17 (one week ago) link

The Bourne tv show was (quelle surprise!) kinda shit.

Dr. Teeth and the Women (Old Lunch), Thursday, 16 January 2020 12:45 (one week ago) link

Oh it already came out? I just saw an ad for it and thought it was upcoming

Baby yoda laid an egg (wins), Thursday, 16 January 2020 12:48 (one week ago) link

Yeah, the first season has already aired in the US. It's an incredible use of your time, really something to look forward to.

Dr. Teeth and the Women (Old Lunch), Thursday, 16 January 2020 13:00 (one week ago) link

Adverts for Bad Boys For Life everywhere today including the side of the bus, I hated Bad Boys II so much that I had to cancel a night out, still consider it the worst film ever made, on a moral level as much as anything else, wish I could skip forward a month so I didn't have to hear about it.

mfktz (Camaraderie at Arms Length), Thursday, 16 January 2020 13:14 (one week ago) link

i love how many movies got one vote. voted bobs burgers bc thousands and thousands upon minutes of it already exist, why do we need 85 more

warn me about a lurking rake (One Eye Open), Thursday, 16 January 2020 13:16 (one week ago) link

hadn't realized nu-Bad Boys isn't even directed by Michael Bay, which renders it even more pointless.

bold caucasian eroticism (Simon H.), Thursday, 16 January 2020 13:22 (one week ago) link

i just realized that too!

american bradass (BradNelson), Thursday, 16 January 2020 13:27 (one week ago) link

just chortled at the concept of old bastards being "boys" when I saw on the side of a bus.

calzino, Thursday, 16 January 2020 13:32 (one week ago) link

For this Martin Lawrence comes out of retirement? He couldn't have just stuck with his A+ appearance in The Beach Bum?

Dr. Teeth and the Women (Old Lunch), Thursday, 16 January 2020 13:32 (one week ago) link

I wondered who voted for bobs burgers! People are well disposed toward the show and I liked what little I’ve seen but yeah the thing of making a slightly longer episode of a sitcom and releasing it to theatres is its own kind of cynicism

Baby yoda laid an egg (wins), Thursday, 16 January 2020 13:32 (one week ago) link

I wouldn't want to engage in hyperbole in any way, but I would like everyone who was involved with BBII in any way, extras, dolly grip, set catering, cinema ushers, DVD production plant workers, to be locked up in alcatraz and the key thrown away, also anyone who watched it and doesn't agree with this course of action should go there too.

mfktz (Camaraderie at Arms Length), Thursday, 16 January 2020 13:33 (one week ago) link

And giving good reviews to its sequel, even if it's brilliant and nothing like the last one, this also lands you in jail.

mfktz (Camaraderie at Arms Length), Thursday, 16 January 2020 13:34 (one week ago) link

thinking of possible gimmicks for The Half Invisible Man 2: Get some troosers on before you get arrested you diaphanous flasher!

calzino, Thursday, 16 January 2020 13:36 (one week ago) link

Haha I thought bb2 was meant to be c21 action canon (I haven’t seen it, or hot fuzz which I understand to have contributed to its canonisation)

Baby yoda laid an egg (wins), Thursday, 16 January 2020 13:39 (one week ago) link

simon pegg will be one of the first ones shipped out to alcatraz, yes.

mfktz (Camaraderie at Arms Length), Thursday, 16 January 2020 13:41 (one week ago) link

actually on second thoughts instead of alcatraz we should use guantanamo bay

mfktz (Camaraderie at Arms Length), Thursday, 16 January 2020 13:42 (one week ago) link

hadn't realized nu-Bad Boys isn't even directed by Michael Bay, which renders it even more pointless.

― bold caucasian eroticism (Simon H.), Friday, January 17, 2020 12:22 AM (forty-six minutes ago)

i just realized that too!

― american bradass (BradNelson), Friday, January 17, 2020 12:27 AM (forty minutes ago)

^ turns out this is not by Bay by the way

― don't care didn't ask still clappin (sic), Thursday, January 9, 2020 8:28 AM (one week ago)

couldn't convince Smith and Lawrence to be played by giant CGI robots (apparently he has a cameo though)


For this Martin Lawrence comes out of retirement? He couldn't have just stuck with his A+ appearance in The Beach Bum?

― Dr. Teeth and the Women (Old Lunch), Friday, January 17, 2020 12:32 AM (thirty-five minutes ago)

...he retired after The Beach Bum? for how long, two weeks?

Just watched Beach Bum last week btw and he was entertaining, though it felt like a Happy Madison scene floating in the middle of a Korine film

don't care didn't ask still clappin (sic), Thursday, 16 January 2020 14:15 (one week ago) link

i sorta wish i'd voted for "Minions: The Rise of Gru." haven't seen any of these but if i'm not mistaken, this is the fifth film and Gru is the main character --- they're just now getting around to his rise?? it's a rare achievement for the fourth sequel to actually make all previous entries seem even more pointless, just by its title.

Doctor Casino, Thursday, 16 January 2020 14:18 (one week ago) link

I haven't seen one second of anything Minion-related beyond trailers and the like but the entire enterprise just feels to me like an animated adaptation of chronic depression.

Dr. Teeth and the Women (Old Lunch), Thursday, 16 January 2020 14:33 (one week ago) link

i've experienced both chronic depression and the minion movie and if i had to do one of them again i'd 100% choose the former over the latter

que pasa picasso (bizarro gazzara), Thursday, 16 January 2020 14:37 (one week ago) link

https://i.redd.it/3ty5ok8xsowz.jpg

Dr. Teeth and the Women (Old Lunch), Thursday, 16 January 2020 14:39 (one week ago) link

Even in this bullshit field, anything with “the rise of” in the title is going to be extra bullshit

the public eating of beans (Sparkle Motion), Thursday, 16 January 2020 15:36 (one week ago) link

Should make a sequel to Dick called Rise of Dick

papa stank (Neanderthal), Thursday, 16 January 2020 15:52 (one week ago) link

Any original property hoping to be a contender in this brave new world is gonna need to have the balls right out the gate to call itself ___ Part 1: The Rise of (character you've never heard of and about whose rise you have no reason to care).

Dr. Teeth and the Women (Old Lunch), Thursday, 16 January 2020 15:53 (one week ago) link

Jungle Cruise 2: Rise of Ecks vs Sever

papa stank (Neanderthal), Thursday, 16 January 2020 15:55 (one week ago) link

https://i.imgur.com/bhOWbK7.jpg

don't care didn't ask still clappin (sic), Thursday, 16 January 2020 16:00 (one week ago) link

xxp Ready Player One did that. Spielberg truly is the preeminent director of our time

frogbs, Thursday, 16 January 2020 16:01 (one week ago) link

Chopin: Rise of The Boy Part III

the public eating of beans (Sparkle Motion), Thursday, 16 January 2020 16:48 (one week ago) link

I was v confused by Brahms the boy 2 but I was confusing the boy (which I know literally nothing about” with Disney’s the kid

Baby yoda laid an egg (wins), Thursday, 16 January 2020 16:49 (one week ago) link

The Rise of The Boy’s Kid

the public eating of beans (Sparkle Motion), Thursday, 16 January 2020 16:51 (one week ago) link

Closing a parenthetical with a quotation mark is what all the cool kids are doing in 20 btw

Baby yoda laid an egg (wins), Thursday, 16 January 2020 16:52 (one week ago) link

IIRC The Boy is a quasi-sequel to Disney's The Kid.

Dr. Teeth and the Women (Old Lunch), Thursday, 16 January 2020 16:58 (one week ago) link

The K2d's Hitman's Bodyguard's Wife: The Boy

the public eating of beans (Sparkle Motion), Thursday, 16 January 2020 17:51 (one week ago) link

just chortled at the concept of old bastards being "boys" when I saw on the side of a bus.

― calzino, Thursday, January 16, 2020 8:32 AM (four hours ago) bookmarkflaglink

they are "boys for life," which is bad

culture of mayordom (voodoo chili), Thursday, 16 January 2020 17:54 (one week ago) link

They get killed in this one and then have to fight crime in the aft- oh wait, been done

papa stank (Neanderthal), Thursday, 16 January 2020 17:59 (one week ago) link

https://i.imgur.com/aFrPqaF.jpg

mfktz (Camaraderie at Arms Length), Friday, 17 January 2020 11:13 (one week ago) link

o shit waddup: rise of dat boi

que pasa picasso (bizarro gazzara), Friday, 17 January 2020 11:16 (one week ago) link

Didn't even notice the Minions sequel, would have voted that. Probably my brain was trying to protect me. Minions must be among the top 5 worst movies I've seen in a theater

Vinnie, Friday, 17 January 2020 12:51 (one week ago) link

I saw Parasite yesterday in a packed 6:00pm screening and the previews were:
Ghostbusters Afterlife
Top Gun Maverick
some kind of Bourne-related tv show on amazon (doubly wtf)
Black Widow
In the Heights

I'm allergic to Lin Manuel Miranda's whole deal, but it seemed quasi-miraculous after the others. Part of Parasite's surprising success in N America must be related to how thoroughly demoralizing sitting through those trailers felt. Top Gun in particular played like a witless parody of the thread phenomenon.

rob, Sunday, 26 January 2020 15:34 (three days ago) link

This new Scooby-Doo looks like quite a departure.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5P8R2zAhEwg

jmm, Sunday, 26 January 2020 15:44 (three days ago) link

ok lol

rob, Sunday, 26 January 2020 15:45 (three days ago) link

Yesterday I saw a trailer for Wonder Woman 1984 that makes me more optimistic--soundtracked to "Blue Monday" and featuring gloriously lol-80s graphic effects. I think I'm going to have to see this for the art direction if nothing else.

Life is a banquet and my invitation was lost in the mail (j.lu), Monday, 27 January 2020 14:04 (two days ago) link

Studios will look at the success of Parasite and the failure of Terminator and they will still say, hmmm, looks like nobody has made a film adaptation of the beloved '80s sitcom Small Wonder, let us throw $800 million at that idea and see how much of it winds up straight in the toilet.

Dr. Teeth and the Women (Old Lunch), Monday, 27 January 2020 14:08 (two days ago) link

I saw that trailer too, but was disappointed that it had some weird version of Blue Monday with rock guitars. :(

(xpost)

Tuomas, Monday, 27 January 2020 14:08 (two days ago) link

US election

Catherine, Boner of JP Sweeney & Co (darraghmac), Monday, 27 January 2020 14:14 (two days ago) link


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