Lads, it's the Premier League thread - EPL 2019/20

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Grant Hanley categorically not ready.

ShariVari, Friday, 9 August 2019 19:14 (eleven months ago) link

Norwich really don't deserve this

Number None, Friday, 9 August 2019 19:30 (eleven months ago) link

This is going to be one of the better performances by a team that loses 8-0 isn't it

Dadjokke (Sgt. Biscuits), Friday, 9 August 2019 19:33 (eleven months ago) link

Hold on, Grant Hanley's playing in the Premiership?

Euripedes' Trousers (Tom D.), Friday, 9 August 2019 19:37 (eleven months ago) link

In a manner of speaking.

ShariVari, Friday, 9 August 2019 19:38 (eleven months ago) link

The own goal was pretty hilarious.

But there was a span of ten minutes when it was 2-0 where Liverpool should have conceded

i'd rather zing like a man, than FP like a coward (Neanderthal), Friday, 9 August 2019 19:44 (eleven months ago) link

alisson ;_;

gbx, Friday, 9 August 2019 19:44 (eleven months ago) link

Plucky Pukki pulls one bakk.

Euripedes' Trousers (Tom D.), Friday, 9 August 2019 20:30 (eleven months ago) link

more footage of Delia Smith and Alan Hansen please. i wonder what theyre saying to each other

Windsor Davies, Friday, 9 August 2019 20:32 (eleven months ago) link

o rite

Hansen on Delia: “My wife and I met Delia and Michael through the Radio Times. The Radio Times used to take readers to New York and back on the QEII and that's where we first met, and we've all stayed in touch and we're really good friends.”

slightly more confused/intrigued than i was before

Windsor Davies, Friday, 9 August 2019 20:33 (eleven months ago) link

"you can't win anything with cooks"

Number None, Friday, 9 August 2019 20:33 (eleven months ago) link

Norwich manager looks like a bad guy from a Steven Segal movie

The World According To.... (Michael B), Friday, 9 August 2019 22:23 (eleven months ago) link

He's a mean looking dude, for sure.

Euripedes' Trousers (Tom D.), Friday, 9 August 2019 22:31 (eleven months ago) link

he looks a hardened Wehrmacht commander when he dons the full length leather jacket.

calzino, Friday, 9 August 2019 22:32 (eleven months ago) link

Norwich manager looks like a bad guy from a Steven Segal movie
so he looks like Steven Segal?

mfktz (Camaraderie at Arms Length), Friday, 9 August 2019 22:40 (eleven months ago) link

Steven Segal isn't bad, he's ABOVE THE LAW

The World According To.... (Michael B), Friday, 9 August 2019 22:41 (eleven months ago) link

Has long enough passed that I can post this?

Norwich return to the Premier League. The Championship, like all good parents, will keep their room just as they left it for when they come back home next year.

— Danny Baker (@prodnose) April 27, 2019

mfktz (Camaraderie at Arms Length), Friday, 9 August 2019 22:48 (eleven months ago) link

#bantz

They're pretty decent going forward. I think they've enough to stay up. Get fucked Danny Baker

The World According To.... (Michael B), Friday, 9 August 2019 23:34 (eleven months ago) link

Hi I’m a Crystal Palace supporter now.

president of deluded fruitcakes anonymous (silby), Saturday, 10 August 2019 01:28 (eleven months ago) link

Wolverhampton here

i'd rather zing like a man, than FP like a coward (Neanderthal), Saturday, 10 August 2019 01:38 (eleven months ago) link

i just like a good game (match)

alomar lines, Saturday, 10 August 2019 03:01 (eleven months ago) link

Welcome all.

I’m not sure Norwich are much better equipped than Fulham to cope with the Premier League but it’ll be fun to see them try. Pukki and Leitner should score goals. I suppose it only requires Newcastle, Villa and Sheffield United to be worse.

ShariVari, Saturday, 10 August 2019 06:08 (eleven months ago) link

this whole ozil/kolasinac thing seems so weird to me. are they actually being threatened by an organised gang with regard to their testimony or something?

oscar bravo, Saturday, 10 August 2019 08:56 (eleven months ago) link

Is there an ilx fantasy league?

help yourself to another slice of apple ... crumble (Willl), Saturday, 10 August 2019 09:04 (eleven months ago) link

there used to be but I dont think so anymore

or something, Saturday, 10 August 2019 09:59 (eleven months ago) link

better that way

imago, Saturday, 10 August 2019 10:59 (eleven months ago) link

i'd forgotten again that jack wilshere exists

oscar bravo, Saturday, 10 August 2019 11:33 (eleven months ago) link

oh good, VAR is going to really improve the Prem this season

seven against feebs (Noodle Vague), Saturday, 10 August 2019 12:42 (eleven months ago) link

the use of it for razor-thin offsides is so wrong-headed

Number None, Saturday, 10 August 2019 12:51 (eleven months ago) link

yeah absolutely it isn't the existence of the tech i'm bitching about at this stage, but if they keep this shit up i'm gonna stop watching football

seven against feebs (Noodle Vague), Saturday, 10 August 2019 12:53 (eleven months ago) link

I see the league is going to be as competitive as ever.

Euripedes' Trousers (Tom D.), Saturday, 10 August 2019 13:35 (eleven months ago) link

Bournemouth finish about as well as my local team

i'd rather zing like a man, than FP like a coward (Neanderthal), Saturday, 10 August 2019 14:14 (eleven months ago) link

man why wwas this the game they gave us here locally

Bournemouth look terrible

Sheffield, well, mama always said....

i'd rather zing like a man, than FP like a coward (Neanderthal), Saturday, 10 August 2019 14:40 (eleven months ago) link

finally a goal

i'd rather zing like a man, than FP like a coward (Neanderthal), Saturday, 10 August 2019 15:21 (eleven months ago) link

lol...Bournemouth gonna Bournemouth. give away the equalizer with 2 minutes left

i'd rather zing like a man, than FP like a coward (Neanderthal), Saturday, 10 August 2019 15:46 (eleven months ago) link

silby your team got a draw....against a 10 man Everton....at home.

could be worse! a point is a point

i'd rather zing like a man, than FP like a coward (Neanderthal), Saturday, 10 August 2019 15:54 (eleven months ago) link

Billy Sharp :D

seven against feebs (Noodle Vague), Saturday, 10 August 2019 16:05 (eleven months ago) link

Grealish has got a bit of a Cathy Dennis thing going on here now, hmm

Dadjokke (Sgt. Biscuits), Saturday, 10 August 2019 16:33 (eleven months ago) link

Didn't watch a ton of Spurs last season but thought Eric Died was as poor as Trippier, be interested to see if he lasts the season as a regular

Ooh good chance for lucas

oscar bravo, Saturday, 10 August 2019 16:35 (eleven months ago) link

Eric died lol

Aston "Family Court" Barrett (Bananaman Begins), Saturday, 10 August 2019 16:35 (eleven months ago) link

Danny Rose might end up outlasting Poch.

oscar bravo, Saturday, 10 August 2019 16:36 (eleven months ago) link

Lol not deliberate
Xp

oscar bravo, Saturday, 10 August 2019 16:36 (eleven months ago) link

Grealish can't pull off that look like Patrick Berger could.

oscar bravo, Saturday, 10 August 2019 16:38 (eleven months ago) link

Actually watched a snide broadcast of everton v palace in an everton pub... never felt in much danger of exposing myself with extravagant gloating goal celebrations.

Glass half full: we gritted out a point we didn't deserve

Half empty: we played shit and should have been stuffed and are definitely going down if that's the best we've got

Aston "Family Court" Barrett (Bananaman Begins), Saturday, 10 August 2019 16:39 (eleven months ago) link

wanna hear darragh on that goal

oscar bravo, Saturday, 10 August 2019 16:39 (eleven months ago) link

Lol, starting like we ended last season.

ShariVari, Saturday, 10 August 2019 16:39 (eleven months ago) link

One punt down the middle

oscar bravo, Saturday, 10 August 2019 16:39 (eleven months ago) link

Sweet pass, way too easy. Spurs will still win I think but hella shakey at the back.

oscar bravo, Saturday, 10 August 2019 16:51 (eleven months ago) link

disgrace

phil neville jacket (darraghmac), Saturday, 10 August 2019 16:51 (eleven months ago) link

my admiration for watford fc dictates that spurs must score, despite the lols if otherwise

imago, Thursday, 9 July 2020 18:36 (two days ago) link

Amazing

Boris the Spreader (NickB), Thursday, 9 July 2020 18:46 (two days ago) link

lol, why not?

Scampo di tutti i Scampi (ShariVari), Thursday, 9 July 2020 18:47 (two days ago) link

That’s handball, tho.

Scampo di tutti i Scampi (ShariVari), Thursday, 9 July 2020 18:48 (two days ago) link

Awww, heartless bastard var

Boris the Spreader (NickB), Thursday, 9 July 2020 18:48 (two days ago) link

I think it’s fair to assume nobody at Spurs wants to play Suduva Marijampolė in the Europa League qualifiers next season so they’ve agreed to finish tenth.

Scampo di tutti i Scampi (ShariVari), Thursday, 9 July 2020 18:55 (two days ago) link

Hiring Jose after his second Chelsea stint was stupid. Hiring him after his time at Utd was gross negligence

Number None, Thursday, 9 July 2020 18:57 (two days ago) link

Tottenham have become the first team to fail to have a shot on target against Bournemouth since Middlesbrough in the Championship in March 2015.

— Daniel Storey (@danielstorey85) July 9, 2020

Boris the Spreader (NickB), Thursday, 9 July 2020 19:07 (two days ago) link

Classic Mou.

The Fields o' Fat Henry (Tom D.), Thursday, 9 July 2020 19:16 (two days ago) link

my admiration for watford fc dictates that united must score another five, albeit with apologies to sgt biscuits and windsor davies

imago, Thursday, 9 July 2020 19:20 (two days ago) link

i guess if i really admired watford fc i'd back them to beat west ham and send them down at long, glorious last, and ought to be supporting villa here

imago, Thursday, 9 July 2020 19:28 (two days ago) link

that was a foul by Fernandes tbh

Number None, Thursday, 9 July 2020 19:45 (two days ago) link

that is an absolute nonsense from VAR

imago, Thursday, 9 July 2020 19:47 (two days ago) link

fun hearing gary neville slowly casting off utd blinkers and getting angrier about it

imago, Thursday, 9 July 2020 19:50 (two days ago) link

you've obviously never listened to him commentate on a Utd game

Number None, Thursday, 9 July 2020 19:54 (two days ago) link

no i know he's pretty fair

imago, Thursday, 9 July 2020 19:59 (two days ago) link

this kid has a zero-backlift cannonball, he's like hasselbaink

imago, Thursday, 9 July 2020 20:06 (two days ago) link

goal machine

Boris the Spreader (NickB), Thursday, 9 July 2020 20:07 (two days ago) link

Greenwood is actually going to be the best striker in the world

― Number None, Saturday, July 4, 2020 4:15 PM (five days ago)

Number None, Thursday, 9 July 2020 20:07 (two days ago) link

he's probably the best finisher in the league as it stands

Number None, Thursday, 9 July 2020 20:09 (two days ago) link

last time i checked luke shaw was being called fat by everyone but he's looked every bit england's left-back of choice in this game, pls explain

imago, Thursday, 9 July 2020 20:58 (two days ago) link

Mou is the Spurs manager.

The Fields o' Fat Henry (Tom D.), Thursday, 9 July 2020 20:59 (two days ago) link

twitter-searching 'luke shaw' by latest gives light to a truly baffling array of praise and condemnation

imago, Thursday, 9 July 2020 21:03 (two days ago) link

stare not into the abyss i guess

imago, Thursday, 9 July 2020 21:20 (two days ago) link

I agree with them all

Number None, Thursday, 9 July 2020 21:21 (two days ago) link

I mean there was a bit in the first half where he stopped for a little break while chasing down a Martial pass, gave up on it, then started running again and almost caught it

The man contains multitudes (lol fat)

Number None, Thursday, 9 July 2020 21:29 (two days ago) link

i tend to side with divisive players, long may he reign

imago, Thursday, 9 July 2020 21:33 (two days ago) link

Shaw has come through lockdown in way better shape than I thought he would, had another good game tonight imo

Boris the Spreader (NickB), Thursday, 9 July 2020 21:55 (two days ago) link

Spurs should sack Mourinho in September before they sack him in January.

in twelve parts (lamonti), Friday, 10 July 2020 09:58 (yesterday) link

A presumed Manchester derby FA Cup final could be very interesting.

in twelve parts (lamonti), Friday, 10 July 2020 10:00 (yesterday) link

I wonder what we'd have to do to get Poch back at this stage.

Matt DC, Friday, 10 July 2020 10:16 (yesterday) link

must be so dispiriting seeing spurs go from one of the most watchable teams to that pile of garbage last night. at least man u fans had the lvg /moyes comedy years to line their stomachs with before being served mou's foul gruel

Boris the Spreader (NickB), Friday, 10 July 2020 11:15 (yesterday) link

I just fundamentally hate watching them in a way I didn't even under Tactics Tim or in the absolute doldrums of the AVB era. There's just nothing worth watching and it's not like we're difficult to break down or even especially effective as a trade-off.

Matt DC, Friday, 10 July 2020 11:35 (yesterday) link

I wonder if there are any other Southampton managers we can poach.

Spurs' problems go far beyond Mourinho but he also seems like the worst person in the world to try to solve them.

Scampo di tutti i Scampi (ShariVari), Friday, 10 July 2020 11:35 (yesterday) link

i don't think he's trying tbf

Mein Skampf (Noodle Vague), Friday, 10 July 2020 12:42 (yesterday) link

Jol's available iirc 😗

Scampidocio (Le Bateau Ivre), Friday, 10 July 2020 12:49 (yesterday) link

This squad with Jol would be a lot more fun, 4-4 every game and probably no lower down the league than we are already.

Matt DC, Friday, 10 July 2020 12:52 (yesterday) link

AVB is still only 42.

The Fields o' Fat Henry (Tom D.), Friday, 10 July 2020 13:03 (yesterday) link

Was just reminiscing the other day about the time when he jacked football management in to do some kind of trans-Siberian rally and crashed on the first day.

Matt DC, Friday, 10 July 2020 13:15 (yesterday) link

marseille had a p good season! albeit he still uses his spurs tactic of having his team take a lot of shots from sub-optimal positions whilst forcing the opposition to also take shots from poor positions just less of them. the abiding memory i have of spursAVB is andros townsend smacking 35 yard shots.

anyway number0 otm

Hiring Jose after his second Chelsea stint was stupid. Hiring him after his time at Utd was gross negligence

― Number None, Thursday, July 9, 2020 7:57 PM (yesterday) bookmarkflaglink

oscar bravo, Friday, 10 July 2020 16:03 (yesterday) link

Obv hate West Ham as much as everyone else but delighted for Antonio tbh.

Scampo di tutti i Scampi (ShariVari), Saturday, 11 July 2020 13:04 (six hours ago) link

Swapping grealish for antonio this week is the highlight of my fantasy league season

or something, Saturday, 11 July 2020 13:30 (six hours ago) link

sad that Watford are stopping up, feel bad for Norwich about just what a total capitulation their season's been, but taking that in stride seems like the Norwich way

Mein Skampf (Noodle Vague), Saturday, 11 July 2020 15:00 (four hours ago) link

Chelsea defending is shambolic. 2-0.

Scampo di tutti i Scampi (ShariVari), Saturday, 11 July 2020 17:05 (two hours ago) link

lol they've scored again? it's all a bit :/ but i'm clearly not cheering for Chelsea

Mein Skampf (Noodle Vague), Saturday, 11 July 2020 17:07 (two hours ago) link

And again!

Scampo di tutti i Scampi (ShariVari), Saturday, 11 July 2020 18:06 (one hour ago) link

finishing the season with a flourish

Mein Skampf (Noodle Vague), Saturday, 11 July 2020 18:44 (one hour ago) link

McBurnie on fire. No pun intended.

The Fields o' Fat Henry (Tom D.), Saturday, 11 July 2020 18:45 (one hour ago) link

Love to see it

𝔠𝔞𝔢𝔨 (caek), Saturday, 11 July 2020 19:05 (forty-six minutes ago) link


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