things you once thought socially acceptable which now horrify you to remember

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Li'l Brexit (Tracer Hand), Wednesday, 10 July 2019 18:32 (one week ago) link

Everything.

Pauline Male (Eric H.), Wednesday, 10 July 2019 18:32 (one week ago) link

White male hegemony, didn't even give it a second thought when I was four.

Logy Psycho (Old Lunch), Wednesday, 10 July 2019 18:38 (one week ago) link

Calling people fags, homos, etc. Playing "smear the queer". I'm not around that many kids now, but thankfully I never hear young people do this.

A True White Kid that can Jump (Granny Dainger), Wednesday, 10 July 2019 18:44 (one week ago) link

hoo boy.

i have "almost" answers to this due to how much stuff was socially acceptable (and still is to some extent) in west central scotland growing up, but i was generally at least a bit uncomfortable with all of it

bookmarkflaglink (jim in vancouver), Wednesday, 10 July 2019 18:44 (one week ago) link

the main thing would be homophobia. calling people poofs and saying stuff was bent was just completed "normal" during my school days and while i was opposed to homophobia from an intellectual pov - didn't see why anyone's rights should be abrogated due to harmless proclivities - i didn't connect that with constant level of ambient homophobia around me being a bad thing

bookmarkflaglink (jim in vancouver), Wednesday, 10 July 2019 18:47 (one week ago) link

I kinda feel like this experience is universal for any person who demonstrates growth. Like, if your answer to the question is 'nothing' you were either born a saint or you might be an actual monster rn.

Logy Psycho (Old Lunch), Wednesday, 10 July 2019 18:48 (one week ago) link

I remember a certain popular webcomic that tried to coin the word "ghey" because they wanted to use "gay" as a pejorative without triggering any backlash

frogbs, Wednesday, 10 July 2019 18:59 (one week ago) link

also related, the blatant semi-ironic anti-Semitism derived pretty much exclusively from Eric Cartman

frogbs, Wednesday, 10 July 2019 18:59 (one week ago) link

i didn't connect that with constant level of ambient homophobia around me being a bad thing

yeah, this - thinking back on all the 'gay panic' jokes in 80s & 90s TV & movies that i never thought twice about is astonishing.

One Eye Open, Wednesday, 10 July 2019 19:00 (one week ago) link

Ace Ventura: Pet Detective being a pretty notable example

frogbs, Wednesday, 10 July 2019 19:02 (one week ago) link

I guess the problem I have with this question is determining the threshold of "socially acceptable". Does that mean 'nearly universally accepted as the norm' or just 'practiced by a substantial number of people without serious social repercussions beyond being thought rather boorish or ignorant'?

Because if we're using the first definition, social mores were already shifting substantially by about 1980 so that racism, xenophobia, sexism, ageism, and mockery of the disabled were not 'nearly universally' considered the norm, whereas if we're using the second definition "socially acceptable" would still include most of that behavior.

A is for (Aimless), Wednesday, 10 July 2019 19:51 (one week ago) link

8. dropping a lit cigarette onto a carpet and grinding it out with my heel. i did this at a party once, fully aware of what i was doing. it was crowded. i still think about that. what the fuck?

Li'l Brexit (Tracer Hand), Thursday, 11 July 2019 23:26 (one week ago) link

9. just not doing my own dishes for months. oh they got done. my housemate did them. again. what the fuck. yes i was young but i was supposedly a grown-ass man.

Li'l Brexit (Tracer Hand), Thursday, 11 July 2019 23:27 (one week ago) link

Internalized misogyny :(

weird woman in a bar (La Lechera), Friday, 12 July 2019 00:13 (one week ago) link

xp those are some good ones tracer, lol

cheese canopy (map), Friday, 12 July 2019 00:38 (one week ago) link

10. making chummy comments to strangers you like on internet message boards

cheese canopy (map), Friday, 12 July 2019 00:39 (one week ago) link

11. making nasty comments to strangers you don't like on internet message boards

cheese canopy (map), Friday, 12 July 2019 00:40 (one week ago) link

12. The smoking lounges at the teen dance clubs <—- plural! that I went to as a preteen and teen

weird woman in a bar (La Lechera), Friday, 12 July 2019 00:43 (one week ago) link

My high school had a smoking area. The school actually put up a set of bleachers so kids could sit in relative comfort and smoke between classes.

shared unit of analysis (unperson), Friday, 12 July 2019 01:04 (one week ago) link

i was cursed by god to do stupid moron things all the time so i'm feeling this thread

Vape Store (crüt), Friday, 12 July 2019 01:17 (one week ago) link

I mean, I grew up in Alabama and spent time in the military. I’m proud of how much shit I could write in this thread (but won’t).

El Tomboto, Friday, 12 July 2019 01:25 (one week ago) link

13. Not picking up after the dog.

visiting, Friday, 12 July 2019 01:58 (one week ago) link

Calling people fags, homos, etc

This. Similarly, calling people retards/retarded.

Internalized misogyny :(

and this, of course. feel like it took me way too long to get past the whole "I'm not like other girls" bullshit.

Roz, Friday, 12 July 2019 02:46 (one week ago) link

If by "society" one means one's high school classmates, then we'll see a lot more regrettable and immature behavior tagged as 'used to be socially acceptable' than if we broaden that scope a bit.

A is for (Aimless), Friday, 12 July 2019 04:03 (one week ago) link

the truest society there is

Li'l Brexit (Tracer Hand), Friday, 12 July 2019 08:23 (one week ago) link

If by "society" one means one's high school classmates, then we'll see a lot more regrettable and immature behavior tagged as 'used to be socially acceptable' than if we broaden that scope a bit.

― A is for (Aimless)

i didn't talk to my high school classmates, most of the formerly "acceptable" things that now horrify me happened on usenet

Un Poco Loco Moco (rushomancy), Friday, 12 July 2019 14:07 (one week ago) link

the decline of public smoking has been impressive

mookieproof, Friday, 12 July 2019 15:15 (one week ago) link

the Confederate battle flag

Brad C., Friday, 12 July 2019 15:27 (one week ago) link

it was flown all over the place in 1960s-80s Alabama and Georgia, often in official or quasi-official settings, and I don't think it dawned on me why that was wrong until I was 25 or so

Brad C., Friday, 12 July 2019 16:03 (one week ago) link

I had a dukes of hazzard big wheel which had the confed flag all over it! Nobody thought anything of it, even being in Illinois.

A True White Kid that can Jump (Granny Dainger), Friday, 12 July 2019 16:06 (one week ago) link

Nobody thought anything of it

Oh, I'm sure there were a few. Let's ask around.

A is for (Aimless), Friday, 12 July 2019 18:13 (one week ago) link

Well sure now I do wonder what the parents of my black best friend and black "girlfriend" thought of it. I should ask my mom what she thought of it too.

A True White Kid that can Jump (Granny Dainger), Friday, 12 July 2019 18:19 (one week ago) link

Confederate flags appeared on album covers without much incident (Give Out But Don’t Give Up, Will the Circle Be Unbroken?)

Mr. Snrub, Friday, 12 July 2019 21:48 (one week ago) link

Give Out But Don't Give Up sold 7 copies outside of the UK tbf

jou're much too jung, girl (Noodle Vague), Friday, 12 July 2019 21:51 (one week ago) link

I know what you mean but don't think either of those albums are good examples of the phenomenon - one being a William Eggleston photo on an album by a British band that's fairly obscure in the US, and the other being a cover which features both the stars n stripes *and* the stars and bars, on either side of a Civil War Union general (I've never been able to figure out exactly who that is - it's not Grant, Sherman, Custer, Burnside, or McClellan)

Οὖτις, Friday, 12 July 2019 21:55 (one week ago) link

xp

Οὖτις, Friday, 12 July 2019 21:55 (one week ago) link

Lynyrd Skynyrd, Alabama, etc. might be better examples

Οὖτις, Friday, 12 July 2019 21:58 (one week ago) link

the decline of public smoking has been impressive

yeah I remember being kinda upset at the bar smoking ban at the time...I don't smoke, but it just felt kinda wrong...nowadays I'd be pretty pissed if someone lit up near me

frogbs, Friday, 12 July 2019 22:03 (one week ago) link

what if someone vaped near you

Οὖτις, Friday, 12 July 2019 22:07 (one week ago) link

oh that I don't care about

its not so much the smoke itself that bothers me from the cigarette but rather the fact that you have to change clothes and take a shower after

frogbs, Friday, 12 July 2019 22:16 (one week ago) link

i love smoking cigarettes but i am very glad you can't smoke inside bars and it seems insane that was a thing so recently (where I'm from). i do however like being in jurisdictions where smoking inside is banned, but you can still have a smoke on a bar's patio/terrasse

bookmarkflaglink (jim in vancouver), Friday, 12 July 2019 22:22 (one week ago) link

some of the "flavored" vape exhaust is nauseously pungent
think everyone p much agrees that smoking a cig looks kinda cool. but seeing people constantly sucking on a lil plastic box or w/e...p dorky looking.

A True White Kid that can Jump (Granny Dainger), Friday, 12 July 2019 22:25 (one week ago) link

that smoking on airplanes ever was allowed is a major wtf

A True White Kid that can Jump (Granny Dainger), Friday, 12 July 2019 22:26 (one week ago) link

I have personally smoked a cigarette on an airplane. NB: I have not smoked cigarettes for 35 years.

A is for (Aimless), Friday, 12 July 2019 22:47 (one week ago) link

I watched a few episodes of Cheers recently the fact that you could build an 11 season sitcom on Sexual Harrasment is pretty WTF.

American Fear of Pranksterism (Ed), Friday, 12 July 2019 22:52 (one week ago) link

nah that's not what's happening in that show most of the time

honestly the most offensive thing in it is the "cigar store indian" in the background of nearly every scene

Οὖτις, Friday, 12 July 2019 23:00 (one week ago) link

the Confederate battle flag

I watched an episode of The Adventures of Pete and Pete where the younger Pete forms a band, and their ten year old drummer was wearing a Confederate flag bandanna. Definitely seemed odd now how unremarkable it was.

https://66.media.tumblr.com/9f16d3237b7c3737d68a6042083b4ac6/tumblr_mq0dj5m4Bu1r1e98bo1_1280.png

blatherskite, Friday, 12 July 2019 23:06 (one week ago) link

its not so much the smoke sex itself that bothers me from the cigarette but rather the fact that you have to change clothes and take a shower after

― frogbs, Friday, 12 July 2019 22:16 (one hour ago) bookmarkflaglink

fixed for catholic

phil neville jacket (darraghmac), Friday, 12 July 2019 23:29 (one week ago) link

I've heard that said about Cheers by someone else and idrgi, although I don't really know the later seasons. What makes the Sam/Diane relationship closer to harassment than the relationships on Parks and Recreation or the The Office (US)?

All along there is the sound of feedback (Sund4r), Saturday, 13 July 2019 01:05 (one week ago) link

i think red meat will be last! lots of lobbyists and murrican jobs, plus multiple decades of people brainwashed into believing red meat is TRUE FOOD and a sign of casual wealth. would not be surprised to see NIMBY state legislature blocking federal mandates to reduce red meat consumption in the 2040's

Fuck the NRA (ulysses), Thursday, 18 July 2019 16:24 (three days ago) link

Ideally I’d like to eat only expensive red meat but there’s so much of the cheap shit available

president of deluded fruitcakes anonymous (silby), Thursday, 18 July 2019 16:25 (three days ago) link

Not recycling your kitchen waste, which most people (in the UK at least) don't seem to do

crumhorn invasion (Matt #2), Thursday, 18 July 2019 16:26 (three days ago) link

or care about

crumhorn invasion (Matt #2), Thursday, 18 July 2019 16:26 (three days ago) link

I do wonder if we're going to face some reckoning with cellphones like people did with cigarettes. It'll take another decade or two to see right? I'm thinking wild new cancers

flappy bird, Thursday, 18 July 2019 16:30 (three days ago) link

everybody dies according to the vices of their time maaaan

think a separate thread for lecturing everyone about the things you personally dislike about 2019 tho tbf

phil neville jacket (darraghmac), Thursday, 18 July 2019 16:38 (three days ago) link

Watching this episode of The Golden Girls last night, this scene reminded me of this thread. Even on a largely queer-positive (and queer-beloved) series, 1980s were often indistinguishable from the 1930s.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wlpVaRyit84

Herman Woke (cryptosicko), Thursday, 18 July 2019 16:38 (three days ago) link

gregg turkington: the early years

Fuck the NRA (ulysses), Thursday, 18 July 2019 16:45 (three days ago) link

the pilot episode of the golden girls had a gay houseboy character called coco which i don't think would fly today

bookmarkflaglink (jim in vancouver), Thursday, 18 July 2019 16:47 (three days ago) link

incidentally played by that actor who died this week, the guy who played the mohel on that ep of seinfeld

bookmarkflaglink (jim in vancouver), Thursday, 18 July 2019 16:48 (three days ago) link

flappy your cell phone cancer trutherism is one of your more endearing quirks

president of deluded fruitcakes anonymous (silby), Thursday, 18 July 2019 17:12 (three days ago) link

lol im just spitballin here!

flappy bird, Thursday, 18 July 2019 17:17 (three days ago) link

I’m still suspicious of cancer from office microwave ovens tbh

Stand on both sides of the escalator. The others will follow. Counterintuitive as it may seem

“Block anyone from walking and people will stop walking,” what a galaxy brain revelation from someone who has never seen a married couple use an escalator

quelle sprocket damage (sic), Thursday, 18 July 2019 18:09 (three days ago) link

WS threads

I'll go one better, WDYLL underwear threads! What were we all thinking.

Stoop Crone (Trayce), Thursday, 18 July 2019 23:53 (three days ago) link

More like how much were we all drinking

El Tomboto, Thursday, 18 July 2019 23:54 (three days ago) link

brb having a few and stripping down

untuned mass damper (mh), Friday, 19 July 2019 01:16 (two days ago) link

Remember the Luna pic

brigadier pudding (DJP), Friday, 19 July 2019 01:27 (two days ago) link

No

Ask Heavy Manners (James Redd and the Blecchs), Friday, 19 July 2019 01:37 (two days ago) link

Wtf ppl posted pics in their underwear?!

Οὖτις, Friday, 19 July 2019 01:44 (two days ago) link

it was the oughts

there were no rules

Karl Malone, Friday, 19 July 2019 01:46 (two days ago) link

the only rule was to be hot, or not

j., Friday, 19 July 2019 01:54 (two days ago) link

We really screwed the world domination stately there. Once upon a time ilxor was mentioned in the same breath as Reddit and Metafilter (by the guardian at least). If only we'd worked a bit harder a positing in our underwear we could have overtaken reddit and cornered the market in Nazi,s Flat earth's, anti vaxxers and people with there bits out.

American Fear of Pranksterism (Ed), Friday, 19 July 2019 02:22 (two days ago) link

ILX: Like Metafilter, without the pizzazz.

pplains, Friday, 19 July 2019 02:58 (two days ago) link

Wtf ppl posted pics in their underwear?!

I don’t know that there’s any evidence Andrew ever had underwear on in his pics, tbh

quelle sprocket damage (sic), Friday, 19 July 2019 03:08 (two days ago) link

There were a few full montys IIRC?

Stoop Crone (Trayce), Friday, 19 July 2019 05:11 (two days ago) link

phrase that will forever haunt my waking hours: Tuomas sundae

untuned mass damper (mh), Friday, 19 July 2019 13:23 (two days ago) link

cellphone radiation

this is seriously not harmful at all

Vape Store (crüt), Friday, 19 July 2019 13:27 (two days ago) link

I had a more serious contribution but now I can't stop lolling at Tuomas sundae

brigadier pudding (DJP), Friday, 19 July 2019 13:28 (two days ago) link

Ken C doing a flip over Tuomas sundae

pplains, Friday, 19 July 2019 13:30 (two days ago) link

That's the one that sticks with me the most.

pplains, Friday, 19 July 2019 13:30 (two days ago) link

just another tuomas sundae

(woah woh)

phil neville jacket (darraghmac), Friday, 19 July 2019 13:51 (two days ago) link

Wish it were Finnday

Ask Heavy Manners (James Redd and the Blecchs), Friday, 19 July 2019 13:51 (two days ago) link

I still say the phrase in my head, notably when there's a sports Super Sunday.

Le Bateau Ivre, Friday, 19 July 2019 13:52 (two days ago) link

if I posted a nude WDYLL photo would you FP (Flag Post) or FP (Fap Posthaste)

frogbs, Friday, 19 July 2019 14:05 (two days ago) link

Only one way to find out.

nickn, Friday, 19 July 2019 16:20 (two days ago) link

ilxor nude selfies wouldn't really truly be nude as the glasses and beard would still be in play

bookmarkflaglink (jim in vancouver), Friday, 19 July 2019 16:21 (two days ago) link

cellphone radiation

this is seriously not harmful at all

― Vape Store (crüt), Friday, July 19, 2019 9:27 AM (two hours ago) bookmarkflaglink

Go on...

flappy bird, Friday, 19 July 2019 16:24 (two days ago) link

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FfgT6zx4k3Q

pomenitul, Friday, 19 July 2019 17:09 (two days ago) link

just plopping down and watching whatever is on tv, or making plans to watch a block of sitcom shows on a specific night is kind of dead
― untuned mass damper (mh), Tuesday, July 16, 2019 5:12 PM

I think loads of people still do this. Mostly non-internet people.

guys fucking each other
― Οὖτις, Monday, July 15, 2019 10:12 PM

You used to find socially acceptable? I'm assuming you meant to say you used to be homophobic?

Robert Adam Gilmour, Friday, 19 July 2019 18:32 (two days ago) link

He was responding to the post immediately preceding his

A more interesting discussion might be “behaviors you thought would never become socially acceptable and then they did”

shhh / let peaceful like things (wins), Friday, 19 July 2019 18:36 (two days ago) link

Gah, sorry! Don't know how I missed that!

Robert Adam Gilmour, Friday, 19 July 2019 18:37 (two days ago) link

Iranian news agencies apparently reporting they have taken a 2nd tanker.

calzino, Friday, 19 July 2019 19:14 (two days ago) link

lol wrong thread

calzino, Friday, 19 July 2019 19:15 (two days ago) link

Capturing tankers will never be socially acceptable.

nickn, Friday, 19 July 2019 20:07 (two days ago) link

"ladies first"

closed beta (NotEnough), Saturday, 20 July 2019 11:29 (yesterday) link

usage of the word "groupie"

weird woman in a bar (La Lechera), Saturday, 20 July 2019 14:03 (yesterday) link

There's a smug arrogance (somewhere along the lines of Frank Zappa) that people associate with bad politics but sometimes I wonder if it didn't really depend on that. I tried to rewatch a documentary series about science fiction from about 20 years ago and I was getting strong vibes of this and I just couldn't be bothered with that.

You still get these people of course but I see less people using this tone as if they're the smartest person in the room. Listening to groups of them try this is nauseating.

Robert Adam Gilmour, Saturday, 20 July 2019 15:42 (yesterday) link

"ladies first"

I worked next to a guy who at meetings would do the thing of standing up any time a lady was taking her seat.

We'd argue about it back at our desks. He'd say it was good manners. I'd tell him it was patronizing.

The women completely ignored it.

pplains, Saturday, 20 July 2019 19:03 (yesterday) link

Flypaper in restaurants. This was quite common in many of the mom 'n' pop type of restaurants my family would eat in throughout the summer when I was a kid. Not only did we not bat an eye at the strips of yellow sticky paper hanging from the ceiling and sometimes dangling close to the table surface, we were actually *enthusiastic* about it, as in "isn't it great this place has flypaper? They must be really up on things and care about creating a clean fly-free environment for their customers!"

gjoon1, Saturday, 20 July 2019 22:09 (yesterday) link


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