"Can I say you're my girlfriend on Facebook?"

I don't think there's a problem w/ public shaming for a girl who does something like this. And I don't think it's horrible that someone notifies the dude about this, even if it's over fb and done by someone obnoxious.

The real problem is that the dude who was about to get married is now *also* dealing w/ this shit in public. He didn't do anything to deserve that, and you'd think that if the internet moralist was really thinking about that dude's best interests, he'd be acting differently.

this is lame and everyone involved is a retard

This is why I never ever discuss my personal life (well much of it) on FB. You cant lock that shit down.

If Google ever bought Facebook I think we'd all just give up the notion of a private life altogether. They'd have too much to blackmail us with.

My first couple years on ILX are enough to damn me forever, anyway. But I am big on protecting the privacy of others, and helping to make them awafe of the risks.

Big Lebowski Shirts!

apparently you can't be 'in a relationship' with your piano on facebook

sorry to be the one to break this but another dude's been playing your piano

omg

http://img2.timeinc.net/ew/dynamic/imgs/080421/Tattoos/Tattoo-Fantasy-Island_l.jpg.http://cdn-viper.demandvideo.com/media/ebb5d38c-032b-4ffa-a559-fca299f3e8c0/jpeg/debffd06-3709-4fff-8f73-8cb428c75d8f_6.jpg.

Alright, how about this perspective?

She had an affair, it was brief, ended, few people knew, and she's 'had it out' with her fiance, and they've sorted out any underlying issues and all is fine.

They decide to get married.

Now, it's all over the internet and she is denied the closure for the sake of the people who go up to the guy and go "lol she emasculated you and gave you the horns of a cuckold siree" so he can't go ahead for fear of looking lol gay or whatever it's called.

Still, lol, ay?

No one's denying this dude's method was ridiculous and was rooted in stone-throwing naughtiness, but I think the facebook needling and the damage done is overstated. The big revelations were all contained in FB e-mails and no one's identity has been revealed.

BTW, the guy she slept with is apparently doing a semester at sea and is unreachable for the most part.

it seems pretty clear that they didn't 'have it out' tho

Dear the sea, before you get married to this guy I have something you might want to know

I dunno, basically if my soon to be wife had cheated on me, I'd want to know about it. I just wouldn't want the process of me learning about it to be public.

it seems pretty clear that they didn't 'have it out' tho

It seems pretty clear that it's nobodyz bizness but dere ownnn

it started being other peoples' bizness when she started sleeping with other people

this is lame and everyone involved is a retard

― akm, Thursday, September 17, 2009 12:39 AM (12 hours ago) Bookmark Suggest Ban Permalink

This whole thing is ridiculous.

I kinda wish I didn't know about it. I don't mean that as a snark, I'm as morbidly fascinated as the next guy, I just feel sorta grey and slimy now for some reason.

this is lame and everyone involved is a retard

― akm, Thursday, September 17, 2009 12:39 AM (12 hours ago) Bookmark Suggest Ban Permalink

^new ilm bord decript?

Lolllllll.

akm otm

also cunga imo it's not v classy of you to be sharing this w/a bunch of strangers

Abs I think what he was saying was that it's already being shared/played out with hundreds of strangers on another board but still . . . retardo etc.

facebook is the new maury

haha

it's a total classless thing to do - the public fb news breaking/taunting.
but i must say i don't mind being included in on the idiotic happenings.

xpost ha

N*** C****** in the case of 6 month old Hadley Michelle...is NOT the father! *does a little dance*

gosh that person has an unfortunate name

I admit this left a bad taste in the mouth - and I'm sorry that it did the same for others- but this was already a mass topic elsewhere, no oen knew (knows) the identity of those involved, so it seemed harmless at the initial posting.

Tuning everyone else onto it was a bit like leaving a faces-being-blurred episode of Springer on in the dentists' office, and as interesting as it may be it's ultimately unhealthy, so sorry.

I guess I just can't help but put myself in the guy's shoes. The cheater? Yeah, whatever, she deserves what shes got coming. But the guy she cheated on is probably feeling like shit just knowing what happened, let alone knowing that effectively the whole world knows. I can only imagine the conversations he now has to have with parents, families, friends, etc. It just feels to me like the guy that alerted him to this was being more than a little perverse and sadistic in the way he chose to let him know.

This had nothing to do with the guy or any responsibility they felt towards him. If if it did, they wouldn't have done it this way. All about getting at her.

Since it ultimately comes from the guy she was cheating with, am guessing he's pissed off or got the humph somehow.

But its not, is it? The guy she actually cheated with is out of the picture, at least thats how I'm reading it. This was all stirred up by a "friend" of the guy she cheated with.

Don't think he's really out of the picture though -- he's a "close" friend and is feeding details. "inner thigh." He's got to be all over this.

From above:

BTW, the guy she slept with is apparently doing a semester at sea and is unreachable for the most part.

Ah was confused there; thought it was the fiancée who'd been at sea when the shag was ging

Don't know what the poster's deal is then. Very moral, but not moral enough to try and minimise damage from his own actions?

Well, I'd say his actions come more from a place of schoolyard bullying and shit-stirring than somewhere genuinely moral, and the whole ethical crusade feel of it all is really just "a-ha! I has a moral justification" trigger pulling on something more ugly and mean spirited. Like someone else mentioned, what could have been done privately and respectfully was sparked by a facebook comment most likely intended to be seen by family, friends, etc, and that to me is what's so slimy about it. (Apart, obviously, from the cheating itself...but...eh I'm feeling gross again...)

what a sickening spectacle on the internet

If you're all serious I'm more than a little bemused, considering some of the circus acts thatve gone on on this very forum over the years.

Those were weird, too.

Fair enough, obviously I'm not intending to paint everyone on ILX as a crowd cheering on cruelty (there were times I did wonder, though...)

http://1.media.collegehumor.com/collegehumor/ch6/2/9/collegehumor.9103eaa220702cb6d8a09209b742d759.png

http://i25.tinypic.com/70969v.jpg

Hahah I thought that was our Grady for a sec!

o it is

gradtastic

wait that's our grady?!

It is not. I just checked. Joe lies. When he cries. Joe lies.