Why I love the Daily Mail, as distilled into one story.

Before wheelie bins we kept rubbish in black plastic bags piled up in the bin cupboard outside, which was far more likely to atract maggots/flies/rats. So I too have no idea WTF these people are complaining about.

These people had steel dustbins with steel lids that rats didn't chew through. It was a golden age of refuse collection, you could leave your bin open and no-one stole your identity.

fouryourkshiremen.jpg

yourkshire jesus christ

http://img19.imageshack.us/img19/4654/31200272.jpg

c'mon, that's actually a fair question

'mothers paid to have children they barely even know'

i mean, it's the only reason i ever get laid, but on the other hand, does it infere with the market?

"mothers paid by the state to have babies with men they barely know" ... wait what?

mothers paid to have children they barely even know'

eh, that's not what i meant to type, but it is a very daily mail sentiment so i stand by it.

i think it refers to lone parent allowance merdeyeux

You know, that office with barely known men in it, that want to father kids.

And that other office full of women that want some money?

It's all filmed for Virgin1 docs, innit?

omg <3 greatest headline ever. i even got my own machete the other day!

i tellya, as a public worker that's the gig we're all going for. i've passed over three promotions just to keep on the list for the fathering office.

Machete by the door must be a bit off-putting tbh

hardly notice after taking all the drugs on the table

cutting lines with a machete is no picnic

especially with govt sponsored backache

Wow, Harriet really HAS some ANGER. Other genius articles by her include:

Why does the NHS hate the elderly so much?

Why HAS the state got it in for foster parents?

I've seen how our education system betrays children - it's enough to make you weep

and...er...

Ladies, thank heaven for younger men

freudian typo in this mail piece about paedos: "As a father, I know it's important not to oversex-state the danger our girls are in."

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/femail/article-1215189/How-safe-daughter-Paedophiles-using-web-trap-girls-middle-class-married-And-police-struggling-cope-.html

Many will have been raped and, in a few tragic cases, the victim may even have been killed. That's the reality of modern paedophilia.

Not like paedophilia in the good old days eh?

I was going to start quoting from the comments but I wouldn't know where to start/stop.

oh fuck's sake

Overtly gay Tory blogger Iain Dale has reached the final stage of parliamentary selection for Bracknell, telling PinkNews: 'I hope any PinkNews readers who live in Bracknell will come to the open primary on October 17 to select their new candidate.

You don't even have to be a Conservative to attend.'

Isn't it charming how homosexuals rally like-minded chaps to their cause?

Isn't it charming how Tories rally like-minded chaps to their cause?

Isn't it charming how the anti-nazi league / the BNP / the Womens Institute / Geir rally like-minded chaps to their cause?

Isn't it charming how ILXors rally like-minded challops to their cause?

http://i.dailymail.co.uk/i/pix/2009/10/04/article-0-06A4D656000005DC-508_468x581.jpg

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/femail/article-1218166/LIZ-JONES-FASHION-THERAPY-Does-trend-Birds-nest-hair-work-real-woman.html

gyaaaaaaa-

i definitely saw her in goodfellas

I definitely saw her in Birds of a Feather.

I definitely saw her in fuck-me shoes.

i think i saw her in tescos

Now she's a big success I want to meet her again.

Never mind the Faily Mail, I think I just saw her in the mirror...

Saw this ...How Kevin McGee's drug addiction and jealousy destroyed marriage to Matt Lucas and cost him his life...and dreaded reading the comments and sure there were loads of nasty crap but the well done DM trollers for getting the DM to change "husband" to ex-husband (i.e. without the scare quotes) and for well and truly trouncing the crazies in the Best Rated stakes.

Wait - they haven't changed it later on. Well, tiny steps.

It shows one good thing, throwing money at a problem is not always good policy. The shame is Loony-Labour thinks that's all it takes.

- mike, London, 7/10/2009 15:00

lol crowbar is hueg

?!

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-1218880/One-gay-man-lesbians-legged-cat-poisoned-curry-plot.html?ITO=1490

The headline was great, you couldn't make this up, LOL!!!!

All the "outraged" namby-pambies complaining about it ought to take some valium and return to their daytime TV programs.

- John, London, EUSSR, 08/10/2009 10:28

One-gay-man-lesbians-legged-cat-poisoned-curry-plot.html?

A gay man turns a cat's legs into lesbians using poisoned curry?

i read an article a while back in the mail by some female columnist about how women dont really have sex for enjoyment but for other reasons which i quite enjoyed.

her SO must have been delighted with that.

for other reasons which i quite enjoyed.

What were those reasons you enjoyed?

itchy fanjita

just the idea that my overwhelming wealth and inability to do chores is obv a surefire way to get laid.

http://www.somersetcountygazette.co.uk/news/4673716.Under_fire_columnist_inspires_carnival_entrants/

zing

“I had thought that if I employed enough local people, got enough local students jobs and internships, spent £350 on a cashmere blanket in a Dulverton gift shop for my sister’s Christmas present, bought all my beauty products and candles in there too, that people would like me and accept me.”

http://current.com/1uk1i4c

You have to stick with that video for the bonkers paintings of Paul Dacre.

Liz Jones is responsible for many of the MMR scare stories in the Mail in recent years, so the more often she is pursued by shotgun wielding locals across Exmoor the better as far as I'm concerned.