this is the horny commiseration thread

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oh, wait, it is a speedometer

― RJG (RJG), Friday, 19 August 2005 14:15 (twenty years ago)

im not horny today for sex, im horny for a good cuddle

― Homosexual II (Homosexual II), Friday, 19 August 2005 14:17 (twenty years ago)

Mandee, I am cuddling with you right now, in my mind.

― Rock Hardy (Rock Hardy), Friday, 19 August 2005 14:20 (twenty years ago)

I thought it was a dB / VU type sound meter. Ach well.

― I Dream Of Sleep (kate), Friday, 19 August 2005 14:20 (twenty years ago)

im not horny today for sex, im horny for a good cuddle

i know that feeling

― stelf)xxx, Friday, 19 August 2005 15:05 (twenty years ago)

I assume they're designed specially for men who cum on the first stroke

I've actually tried these, not specifically because I'm the sort of man who cums on the first stroke, but because I was drunk at the 24 hour shop and it was like *swaying in front of counter* gimmie some of those *points* - needless to say I was too drunk to read or care about the small print.

I can't really report on their anaesthetic effect as there was so much alcohol in my system at the time. On the way back from the shop I fell off my bike and bashed up my elbow really good. This naturally didn't stop me using the condoms but it did mean I woke up with the bed covered in blood, amplifying that dirrty "WTF happened? - ah, great night" moment.

Curiously the monitor in front of me has lots of condoms around it which have been sent to my work as a promo. Instead of being lubricated with anaesthetic they are lubricated with "warm sensations", which I'm hopefully assuming is a very mild form of deep heat.

― angle of dateh, Friday, 19 August 2005 15:42 (twenty years ago)

Someday I will have sex again. Maybe. I hope.

I say this to myself all the time.

― luna (luna.c), Friday, 19 August 2005 16:38 (twenty years ago)

Girls go crazy for a shaved pubes bear

― Bob Dobolina, Friday, 19 August 2005 16:46 (twenty years ago)

All l did last night was dream about sex. I'm going mental with the horn right now.

― Thermo Thinwall (Thermo Thinwall), Friday, 19 August 2005 18:55 (twenty years ago)

I KNOW WHAT YOU MEAN.

― luna (luna.c), Friday, 19 August 2005 19:24 (twenty years ago)

Girls go crazy for a shaved pubes bear

Um, what?

― Je4nne ƒur¥ should buy one (Je4nne Fury), Friday, 19 August 2005 20:30 (twenty years ago)

sweet. i just slept for 11 hours, so hopefully i'll be all good today.

i got an adequate amount of sleep last night, so i'm left to assume a correlation between wakefulness and horndoggyness on my part.

i guess it doesn't help that i spend most of my workday having to look at some nude/mostly nude bodies.

― joseph (joseph), Friday, 19 August 2005 21:29 (twenty years ago)

Umm, what is your job, Joseph?

― jaymc (jaymc), Friday, 19 August 2005 21:31 (twenty years ago)

Also for some reason, I was fine until a few minutes ago.

― jaymc (jaymc), Friday, 19 August 2005 21:32 (twenty years ago)

i work in a library.

― joseph (joseph), Friday, 19 August 2005 21:32 (twenty years ago)

Erm... what kind of library, exactly?

― Thermo Thinwall (Thermo Thinwall), Friday, 19 August 2005 21:34 (twenty years ago)

I wonder why?

Lack of sleep never makes a difference for me.

― luna (luna.c), Friday, 19 August 2005 21:35 (twenty years ago)

the head of the sub-library where i work is keen to get anything relating to downtown nyc in our dept. (even moreso if they happen to be gay/lesbian materials), so i'm processing the first fifteen or so years of the mix festival's videos/paper files. and naturally, in the zillions of press clippings and photo stills therein, there's a whoooooole lotta ribaldry goin' on, so i really can't NOT think of sex when i'm working.

― joseph (joseph), Friday, 19 August 2005 21:51 (twenty years ago)

Joseph, did I mention I was bi?

― jaymc (jaymc), Friday, 19 August 2005 21:58 (twenty years ago)

i believe you did

― joseph (joseph), Friday, 19 August 2005 22:25 (twenty years ago)

Oh dear.

― jaymc (jaymc), Friday, 19 August 2005 22:27 (twenty years ago)

I have become a caricature, haven't I?

― jaymc (jaymc), Friday, 19 August 2005 22:27 (twenty years ago)

YAYYY ILX!

(i think i come across as more of a caricature on these boards than you do anyway) (or so i think)

― joseph (joseph), Friday, 19 August 2005 22:41 (twenty years ago)

(I've got you both beat)

― luna (luna.c), Friday, 19 August 2005 22:44 (twenty years ago)

Which library do you work at, Joseph?

― Mary (Mary), Saturday, 20 August 2005 00:54 (twenty years ago)

Gee, ILx is horny . . .I miss so much while I'm away.

― Miss Misery (thatgirl), Saturday, 20 August 2005 01:49 (twenty years ago)

mary - i work at b0bst, actually! (and within b0bst, the fa1es library)

― joseph (joseph), Saturday, 20 August 2005 05:56 (twenty years ago)

ps i'm drunk so COMMISERATION NOWWWWWWWWWW

― joseph (joseph), Saturday, 20 August 2005 06:11 (twenty years ago)

Le horn. Le sigh.

― Ian Riese-Moraine: a casualty of social estrangement. (Eastern Mantra), Saturday, 20 August 2005 12:58 (twenty years ago)

Le sbian ménage à trois?

― Tuomas (Tuomas), Saturday, 20 August 2005 13:35 (twenty years ago)

Joseph--oh cool! I did my MA at NYU and studied once at Fales--but I felt like I had to treat the book they gave with kid gloves! That's sounds like a cool project they have you working on.

― Mary (Mary), Saturday, 20 August 2005 15:43 (twenty years ago)

― luna (luna.c), Saturday, 20 August 2005 17:36 (twenty years ago)

― jaymc (jaymc), Saturday, 20 August 2005 17:46 (twenty years ago)

Man, more of the same last night :/

― Thermo Thinwall (Thermo Thinwall), Saturday, 20 August 2005 18:17 (twenty years ago)

> oh, wait, it is a speedometer

it says rpms x 10 (possibly x100) which isn't strictly a speedometer, more like angular velocity. um, sexual perfomance measured in rpm? curious. sounds like that film i once saw...

― koogs (koogs), Saturday, 20 August 2005 18:20 (twenty years ago)

(Inches of boner per hour)x10

― Rock Hardy (Rock Hardy), Saturday, 20 August 2005 18:30 (twenty years ago)

THIS IS YUO GUYS HAHA

http://coudformation.tripod.com/clothmother059.jpg http://coudformation.tripod.com/clothmother059.jpg http://coudformation.tripod.com/clothmother059.jpg
http://coudformation.tripod.com/clothmother059.jpg http://coudformation.tripod.com/clothmother059.jpg http://coudformation.tripod.com/clothmother059.jpg
http://coudformation.tripod.com/clothmother059.jpg http://coudformation.tripod.com/clothmother059.jpg http://coudformation.tripod.com/clothmother059.jpg

― joseph pot (STINKOR™), Saturday, 20 August 2005 22:49 (twenty years ago)

"Sex behavior was, for all practical purposes, destroyed; sexual posturing was commonly stereotyped and infantile. Frequently when an isolate [surrogate-raised] female was approached by a normal male, she would sit unmoved, squatting upon the floor -- a posture in which only her heart was in the right place. Contrariwise, an isolate male might approach an in-estrus female, but he might clasp the head instead of the hind legs, and then engage in pelvic thrusts. Other isolate males grasped the female's body laterally, whereby all sexual efforts left them working at cross purposes with reality."

― joseph pot (STINKOR™), Sunday, 21 August 2005 00:25 (twenty years ago)

hornee still

― even still ƒur¥ (Je4nne Fury), Sunday, 21 August 2005 02:05 (twenty years ago)

me too, sweetpants

― luna (luna.c), Sunday, 21 August 2005 04:22 (twenty years ago)

oh.

― jaymc (jaymc), Sunday, 21 August 2005 06:52 (twenty years ago)

Honk the horn.

― Ian Riese-Moraine: a casualty of social estrangement. (Eastern Mantra), Monday, 22 August 2005 00:26 (twenty years ago)

toot toot.

― jaymc (jaymc), Monday, 22 August 2005 06:31 (twenty years ago)

No kiddin.

― luna (luna.c), Monday, 22 August 2005 07:10 (twenty years ago)

That's what wanks are for.

― I Dream Of Sleep (kate), Monday, 22 August 2005 07:11 (twenty years ago)

I'm trying to remember if I used to randomly shoehorn comments about sex into conversations/threads when I *was* actually getting laid.

But then again, I suspect I did, so it's not just a function of the horn. I hope.

― I Dream Of Sleep (kate), Monday, 22 August 2005 10:42 (twenty years ago)

(That said, last night I was sitting around after the gig and three different people at the table (including myself) were complaining about their lack of sex, and about how all our blogs had just become monologues whinging about not getting any sex. See, this is the problem, that when you start blogging, you automatically become emo. Because in the old days, when I did Have Sex, I probably would have just suggested that we go off and have a threesome or something and kill three birds with one stone. But no, I just wrote about it on the interweb instead.)

― I Dream Of Sleep (kate), Monday, 22 August 2005 10:47 (twenty years ago)

Oops, I did it again.

Is there anything or any topic that I cannot figure out how to make into some kind of horn-inducing situation?

(Please do not feel the need to test that theory.)

― I Dream Of Sleep (kate), Monday, 22 August 2005 11:06 (twenty years ago)

Well, it's okay for this thread.

I had a sex dream about a friend of mine who's nine years my senior. It was scandalous.

― Ian Riese-Moraine: a casualty of social estrangement. (Eastern Mantra), Monday, 22 August 2005 12:15 (twenty years ago)

Argh Kate I may only have met you a couple of times and no doubt I... erm, rubbed you up the wrong way, but... I cannot believe you've got trouble finding someone, how you say, hott enough to play with. Maybe you're not looking for playmates in the right places at the moment?

Playing is easy... or perhaps that should be, soft. Love is hard... or perhaps that should be, hell.

Ah, Kitchens Of Distinction *sigh*

― angle of dateh, Monday, 22 August 2005 13:51 (twenty years ago)

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