DUDES: do you pee sitting down by default?

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strongo, everyone, i think

― modestmickey, Wednesday, 18 April 2007 20:04 (seventeen years ago) link

btw strongo as far as laying down the tp goes, i did that till i was 11 or so, after that i submit you are a total pussy if you do it

― deeznuts, Wednesday, 18 April 2007 20:05 (seventeen years ago) link

DO THE MATH:

ERECT PENIS = PIPE

SEMI-SOLID TURD = CABLE

Also, WTF - when you have to pee w/ morning wood or whatever, just BACK UP, duh.

Fuck you jess for "crossing the streams"

― David R., Wednesday, 18 April 2007 20:05 (seventeen years ago) link

yeah peeing immediately after sex is srsly uncomfortable, it's really a "you shoulda thought of that before we left" situation

― ghost rider, Wednesday, 18 April 2007 20:05 (seventeen years ago) link

deeznuts DOLLARSTORE!! re: tp

― and what, Wednesday, 18 April 2007 20:05 (seventeen years ago) link

peeing through a boner is troublesome because not only does it make it hard to aim, but the urethra becomes narrower causing forceful spray effects

― elmo argonaut, Wednesday, 18 April 2007 20:06 (seventeen years ago) link

WTF kind of boners do you guys have that you can tuck them into the bowl while sitting down without painful hurting?

― nickalicious, Wednesday, 18 April 2007 20:06 (seventeen years ago) link

Don't answer that.

― nickalicious, Wednesday, 18 April 2007 20:06 (seventeen years ago) link

http://entimg.msn.com/i/BillMurray/Ghostbusters_300x298.jpg

don't cross the streams, dave

― strongohulkington, Wednesday, 18 April 2007 20:06 (seventeen years ago) link

peeing through a boner is troublesome because not only does it make it hard to aim, but the urethra becomes narrower causing forceful spray effects

-- elmo argonaut, Wednesday, April 18, 2007 4:06 PM (26 seconds ago)

otm cf austin powers 3

― and what, Wednesday, 18 April 2007 20:07 (seventeen years ago) link

I am so hot right now.

― David R., Wednesday, 18 April 2007 20:07 (seventeen years ago) link

I pee sitting down, I find it more comfortable and there's less chance of a missing the toilet.

― Tuomas, Wednesday, 18 April 2007 20:07 (seventeen years ago) link

the boner tuck is just to get it down to 90 degree angle and hit the side wall of the inside rim instead of pissing up

― and what, Wednesday, 18 April 2007 20:07 (seventeen years ago) link

I once wound up peeing in to an empty coffee cup while in the passenger seat of a car travelling down the Long Island Expressway. It was two in the morning and all of a sudden it was either that or wet myself, I had no other choice. Best part? I had perfect aim. Worst part? My newish boyfriend was the one driving. We were together for four years though so it couldn't have freaked him out that much.

― ENBB, Wednesday, 18 April 2007 20:08 (seventeen years ago) link

boner = \ boner after looking at economist for 20 seconds = -

― and what, Wednesday, 18 April 2007 20:08 (seventeen years ago) link

ghost rider & strongo otm re: postcoital urination

― max, Wednesday, 18 April 2007 20:08 (seventeen years ago) link

otm re: crossing streams; brocaine makes this worse

― Catsupppppppppppppp dude ‫茄蕃‪, Wednesday, 18 April 2007 20:08 (seventeen years ago) link

Newish boyfriend = 4 years??!?!?

― David R., Wednesday, 18 April 2007 20:08 (seventeen years ago) link

boner after reading ILE = /

― and what, Wednesday, 18 April 2007 20:08 (seventeen years ago) link

maybe he was into it xpost to ENBB

― the schef (adam schefter ha ha), Wednesday, 18 April 2007 20:09 (seventeen years ago) link

WTF kind of boners do you guys have that you can tuck them into the bowl while sitting down without painful hurting?

It helps to lean forward.

― kenan, Wednesday, 18 April 2007 20:09 (seventeen years ago) link

boner peeing - tips plz?

If it's a particularly tenacious turgidity, or if it's the middle of the night and I want to get it done and go back to bed I will just pee in the tub and run the shower to "flush." Started doing this about a couple years ago, and it's a brilliant solution!

― Jesse, Wednesday, 18 April 2007 20:09 (seventeen years ago) link

WHA

― David R., Wednesday, 18 April 2007 20:09 (seventeen years ago) link

lol

― strongohulkington, Wednesday, 18 April 2007 20:10 (seventeen years ago) link

a friend of mine once had an apadravya and now can only pee sitting down

― elmo argonaut, Wednesday, 18 April 2007 20:10 (seventeen years ago) link

it's always the bodily fluid threads

― strongohulkington, Wednesday, 18 April 2007 20:10 (seventeen years ago) link

the boner tuck is just to get it down to 90 degree angle and hit the side wall of the inside rim instead of pissing up

-- and what, Wednesday, April 18, 2007 4:07 PM (1 minute ago)

this has to require a tiny dick

― modestmickey, Wednesday, 18 April 2007 20:10 (seventeen years ago) link

I am the Ned of these sorts of threads.

― David R., Wednesday, 18 April 2007 20:11 (seventeen years ago) link

no you're a tiny dick

― Mr. Que, Wednesday, 18 April 2007 20:11 (seventeen years ago) link

oh not you mickey

― Mr. Que, Wednesday, 18 April 2007 20:11 (seventeen years ago) link

mod pls change thread title to 'The Great ILX Urination Debate'

― ghost rider, Wednesday, 18 April 2007 20:11 (seventeen years ago) link

mickey, you're a dick

― Mr. Que, Wednesday, 18 April 2007 20:11 (seventeen years ago) link

& lookit the John Holmes motherfucker

― David R., Wednesday, 18 April 2007 20:11 (seventeen years ago) link

If it's a particularly tenacious turgidity, or if it's the middle of the night and I want to get it done and go back to bed I will just pee in the tub and run the shower to "flush." Started doing this about a couple years ago, and it's a brilliant solution!

-- Jesse, Wednesday, April 18, 2007 4:09 PM (1 minute ago)

guys really off your balcony is such an easier, preferable plan

― modestmickey, Wednesday, 18 April 2007 20:11 (seventeen years ago) link

these threads do make me stop thinking about you all as smooth-crotched ken dolls

which i am not thankful for

― strongohulkington, Wednesday, 18 April 2007 20:12 (seventeen years ago) link

does anyone else get a weird feeling if they pee too quickly after ejaculating?

i call this "crossing the streams"

-- strongohulkington, Wednesday, April 18, 2007 4:04 PM (1 minute ago)

ejaculating soon after peeing is also an adventure!

― 69, Wednesday, 18 April 2007 20:12 (seventeen years ago) link

dudes need to stop fronting abt the boner tuck; it doesnt require a "tiny dick" and the pain subsides with the boner, which goes away as you pee.

― max, Wednesday, 18 April 2007 20:12 (seventeen years ago) link

mickey it might work differently on smaller prison toilets

― and what, Wednesday, 18 April 2007 20:12 (seventeen years ago) link

peeing AFTER sex has always been heaven for me actually

dollarstore?? wtf do i care about affordability when it comes to something like toilet paper. its the principle of the thing.

jesus christ ppl

― deeznuts, Wednesday, 18 April 2007 20:12 (seventeen years ago) link

I'M BOYS AND THIS IS THE PISSING CONTEST

― river wolf, Wednesday, 18 April 2007 20:12 (seventeen years ago) link

guys really off your balcony is such an easier, preferable plan

to whom?

― kenan, Wednesday, 18 April 2007 20:12 (seventeen years ago) link

David R - I meant that he was newish at the time of the incident. We were together for about four years after it occurred.

Ally - in retrospect I wouldn't be surprised it that was the case. Unfortunately.

― ENBB, Wednesday, 18 April 2007 20:13 (seventeen years ago) link

now i finally understand where some of the ilx anger comes from. napoleon dick complex.

― modestmickey, Wednesday, 18 April 2007 20:13 (seventeen years ago) link

ok just for everyones info i hit submit at least 8 times before that acutally posted

― deeznuts, Wednesday, 18 April 2007 20:13 (seventeen years ago) link

also ejaculating while you have to pee can lead to this weird sensation where you think you have to pee for the rest of the day but everytime you go to the bathroom nothing comes out

― max, Wednesday, 18 April 2007 20:13 (seventeen years ago) link

I don't have a balcony! I live on the 3rd floor and would have to open a window. And my windows are fickle in their staying up, so I'll be damned. Plus what if my dick got a chill?

― Jesse, Wednesday, 18 April 2007 20:13 (seventeen years ago) link

we can never get real jobs after this

― strongohulkington, Wednesday, 18 April 2007 20:13 (seventeen years ago) link

People get really mad at me when I pee sitting down at the urinal.

When I was in kindergarten, I walked in to the unisex bathroom to find a girl sitting in the urinal, peeing. I have never been able to get that disturbing image out of my mind and I don't know if this is because A)there was something genuinely unsettling about the way she was squished in there B)the fact that there was an open stall, wtf? or C)I am a pervert.

― C0L1N B..., Wednesday, 18 April 2007 20:13 (seventeen years ago) link

I just want to know how it's possible to have to pee w/ wood, whizz into THE TUB, RUN THE SHOWER, then go back to bed, & have that be less invasive to your sleepytime than just PISSING IN THE TOILET LIKE GOD WANTS US TO.

― David R., Wednesday, 18 April 2007 20:14 (seventeen years ago) link

BONERS DO NOT TUCK EQUALLY.

I MEAN I'VE HEARD SOME DUDE DICKS CURVE DOWN WTF

― Catsupppppppppppppp dude ‫茄蕃‪, Wednesday, 18 April 2007 20:14 (seventeen years ago) link

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