you guys can read this if you want. i like you guys.

Enjoyed this! Sharing with a friend who has a record store in (removed identifying detail).

shared with a friend who is opening a store later this summer

I miss old people who were old, too. The other side of the generation chasm. Grandmas who liked Lawrence Welk and Liberace.

I was chatting with a boomer neighbor on the street, who is still actively working in the law. Had a trip to Philly, was sharing an Uber with "a job I never heard of before, an Influencer"

the influencer was super chatty British guy, asked the driver to take him to the best Philly Cheese Steak.

The driver, small talking, let it be known he was a member of the Stylistics. At which point the influencer went nuts and took all sorts of photos.

When my friend got out later, he said "I feel weird tipping you, you may have more money than me?"

The Stylistic had to explain that other than oldies tours to Japan, he has no income from music.

Kinda surprised any blues/r'n'b/r'n'r fan wasn't aware that most musicians like that never got anything from their hits, but I shouldn’t be!

Great article, Scott. I sent it to a friend of mine. Your sense of humor and writing reminds me of him.

it's funny, maria is out in front now most of the week while i'm in back pricing and putting things on Discogs and she now gets all those people who used to drive me crazy. she tells me about them. which means that i get to utter my favorite phrase: "welcome to my world". 15 straight years of people coming in and telling you that they heard that records were coming back. and for 15 years those people never bought a record. she got a real live one last week. one of the usual suspects comes in and tells her - and he was telling her not asking her or trying to start a conversation: *PEOPLE DON'T LISTEN TO RECORDS ANYMORE*. and she nicely says oh yeah people actually do....and then he says *THERE IS NOTHING TO PLAY THEM ON ANYMORE*. *YOU CAN'T GET TURNTABLES ANYMORE*. and she says actually you can....and he says *YOUNG PEOPLE DON'T LISTEN TO THEM ANYMORE*. and she says actually young people do listen to records. and then he says *YOUNG PEOPLE DON'T GO TO SEE LIVE MUSIC ANYMORE*. and she says no i think young people do go see live music. and then he says.......WELL GOOD LUCK WITH ALL THIS. and leaves.
you don't get that at Walgreens or CVS.

thanks! and thank you all again. i'll just keep thanking you all.

ilx has always been very supportive. it has meant a lot to me.

i don't know if i ever mentioned this but waaaaaaay back before i started posting here i heard about ilx from frank kogan in an e-mail and of course i searched for my name when i heard that people talked about rock critics here and someone said something like yeah i don't know about SS and someone else said something like *he's the perfect critic for other critics* and i was like hell yeah! i'm good with that. fuck normal people. i didn't want to write for them. haha! this was probably 2003? it might have been geeta. anyway, that inspired me for real. i didn't even know if anyone liked what i was doing other than chuck - and frank and don - and they were all obviously crazy. in a good way. things like that kept me inspired to do it.

I read this as a sequel to the chapter in Marooned: the latest instalment of a bemused picaresque through the world of work - grocery store employee, custodian, record-store owner...

one of my very favorite movies. free on Youtube!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3w1FoHxjv0k

Yeah this was great. I like rants when they are funny.

Makes me wonder what the stereotypical annoying Gen-X record store visitor will be like once the torch is passed.

gen x record dads generally just look really depressed and like they had way too many IPAs the night before. they rarely give me shit. they rarely speak!

https://riotfest.org/wp-content/uploads/2018/01/Portlandia_801A_BandReunion_MPX-1920x1080_R1.jpg

gen x record dads generally just look really depressed and like they had way too many IPAs the night before. they rarely give me shit. they rarely speak!

I have never been in your shop but it feels good to be seen!

Enjoyed your blog. I miss blogs.

lovely late development is gen x moms coming in by themselves and browsing and buying. also mostly silently. just more women in general now and its such a relief from the non-stop dude parade.

re: "i used to have a blog" - yeah i know, i rediscovered & read it quite recently, it's still there & it's still great

oh wow thanks! i just looked at it for the first time in years. it feels archaeological.

seeing women in large numbers in record stores is totally a new (welcome) experience for me as well.

I haven't actually worked in a store in a long, long time, but I feel like the big generational record-store dad shift was that any given Boomer would presume they understood records more than a younger person behind the counter, as though they'd walked into a store selling their personal childhood possessions and might be asked to explain or sign a few, whereas Gen Xers tend to presume the opposite and desperately want the worker to validate them as cool and knowledgeable

^^^ It me

As a gen x woman lifelong record shopper and former store employee, I very much want to be left alone to make my choices. I 100% don't want to boast about my knowledge nor do I seek the validation of the person behind the counter. Also resent being lumped together based on reproductive choices. Not all women are moms! But I like this essay regardless.

oh gosh i didn't mean to lump everyone together. i meant actual moms. but there are all kinds of gen x women who come in. we have a big queer woman population here of every age too and queer moms and non-moms alike also make up a good portion of our buyers. thank the heavens.

and non-binary people. and the like. lots of younger queer folks. they didn't used to be such a big part of our customer-base. a lot of things have changed in general here since the pandemic. people moved to the country. all kinds of people. which is an awesome by-product of a terrible thing.

i WAS kinda lumping sad gen x dads together though. i basically meant people who reminded me of myself. slow. world-weary. heavy sighs. maybe not so quick to look at the records underneath because it means bending.

still requesting that someone who worked in record/CD stores in the late 90s-early 00s write a treatise on capitalism and planned obsolescence as viewed through CD and video anti-theft technology

because that shit was an unbelievable scam

i WAS kinda lumping sad gen x dads together though. i basically meant people who reminded me of myself. slow. world-weary. heavy sighs. maybe not so quick to look at the records underneath because it means bending.

still requesting that someone who worked in record/CD stores in the late 90s-early 00s write a treatise on capitalism and planned obsolescence as viewed through CD and video anti-theft technology

because that shit was an unbelievable scam

Should have been a link there. But I meant stuff like CD-Text, cd-i, Compact Disc + Graphics, etc.

my usual record store MO is to not say a word except hello because I worked retail for years and mostly just wanted to not talk to customers at all. although if I came into your store I'd probably at least cop to being an ILXor. otherwise that would be entrapment.

omg, please do!. i had an ilxor come in and they were paying for stuff and they only told me as they were leaving. i mean you don't want to miss out on your friend and family discount. or just come in and say hi. no need to buy anything. like i've said before, i've met dozens of people from here and i've enjoyed talking to all of them. even matos!

So I first saw skot's Medium maximal comeback when Chuck sent the link around, in reply to that xpost gmail thread incl. him Frank Lucy S, Mark S & others, which I started (subject line: Sunday Supplement: Chubby Checker Influenced By Moon) with this link to skotpost from 20 years ago, which starts w dorm revelations (not that kind) hosted by historic Dan Bunnybrains in historic Danbury CT, incl. Chubby Checker's musical connections to Jimi Hendrix, producer-wise and more---good read! And I still gotta catch up with this music: https://thefreelancementalists.blogspot.com/2004/02/

a different - longer? - version of that ended up in Ugly Things magazine way back when. i was the first person - as far as i know - to write about that album. still never officially rereleased but word is Chubby hates it.

Mark S on that oftmentioned gmail thread:

I attended EMP in 2007 in Seattle and Scott gave the best (or anyway most memorable because funniest) paper, about death metal I believe (I am not an expert on all the metals, plus it was 17 years ago). Did he write it up? I hope so but don’t know. Afterward he and Maria headed a party to go get (I think) pizza and he was lovely and I talked a great deal to Maria, whom very much likewise.

Mark, here's Scott's EMP paper (on folk metal, actually) -- the top (which I guess means final) post on his old blog, from a decade ago. It is indeed hilarious.

don, i'm gonna have to hire you as my publicist! haha! god, 2007 was several lifetimes ago. saw so many ILXors. it was such a treat to spend time with Mark S. he is such a great person to hang out with. Spent quality time with him and Simon Reynolds and went to a party at Matos manor. that was the first time i had ever spoken in public! i was on a panel with Erik Davis - a real writer! - and before i went on he said to me "you're gonna be great". i have no idea how he could know that. but he is kinda mystical.

2007 really was a million years ago, wasn't it? I met you in 2007 at the NYC reading for Marooned.

that was the same year!!?? holy toledo. that was fun. there were a lot of people there! and i read something weird that wasn't even from the book. jon williams was there. ian. i met nabisco and sang freud and unperson all in one night. jon lewis. laurel. ilx-time. and then my brother played at Cake Shop later that night. i never leave the house but when i do i like it to be memorable.

it's good! it's good writing! i love your writing. not just how much you know about music, how passionate you are about music, your _writing_, the way you _write_ about it.

-

some thoughts.

i've never been to connecticut. when i think about connecticut, i think about new haven pizza. i don't think i've ever been to connecticut. i've only eaten new haven pizza here in portland. it's the second most popular city in the us for new haven pizza, so i'm told. it's good pizza. better than st. louis pizza or altoona-style pizza.

i'm not so much bemused by what regular people do as the idea that there _are_ "regular people", people like your customers. i see signs of them. i went to a movie last night and there were some realtors trying to leverage their queerness for business in the most entitled, white, cringeworthy ways. they seemed to be appealing more to straight people who wanted to perform "allyship" by having a queer realtor. i guess that makes sense. most of the queer people i know aren't exactly ready to buy houses in portland.

time is weird to me. i've lived in the past for years and now i guess i'm "cutting edge" by virtue of being trans but i don't feel cutting edge. i feel extremely archaic. this is the only place i'm on the public internet. even when i talk about the present i talk about it in terms of the past, the way it _used to be_. i don't want to talk about my present. when i was young they said "those who say don't know, those who know don't say". i don't think it's true. i don't know _how_ to say. easier to talk about...

but i am old, i've always thought of myself as old. i mean i'm younger than you, scott, but "you're only as old as you feel". i've felt old, always. "boomer" = "old". i grew up with this weird, like... i wanted to be a boomer. i wished i had been there in the sixties, when things seemed exciting, things seem like they _mattered_, and now i guess for better or for worse things are exciting and i'm somehow caught up in it just by, like. existing. i worshipped these people, i wanted to be like these people, and now the idea of the "boomer" - because it's a _mindset_, not an age, one can be a boomer at any age. there are people who are younger than me who are boomers. i call myself a boomer, because to them boomer is a slur, like cis is a slur, and it's not the _word_, it's how we _use_ it, and we use it that way because of _how they act_. and they don't understand. they don't know. that's the bemusement, to me. it's not that they don't understand other people, it's this _clinical lack of insight_. they know not what they do.

my favorite thing about the term "generation x" is that it was coined to describe boomers. my "generation's" name is a boomer hand-me-down. it seems appropriate.

Dogs are big here. I don't know how it is elsewhere. "Emotional support animals". Animals won't fuck with you like people will, is I guess how it is. My QPP's roommate has an ESA. Flash bites me. I don't know why. I'm not hostile to Flash. People did "no dogs allowed" like in that Snoopy movie so I guess they came up with ESAs so they could have dogs around and like. Everybody _is_ an emotional wreck, everybody I know. People make all kinds of compromises but sometimes, you know how it is. People set "boundaries" in ways that make other people responsible for their shit. And sometimes people use ESAs like that. Not always. Sometimes. So stores have signs up now saying "If you got a seeing-eye dog, fine, but no fucking ESAs please." Sometimes in those precise words. I was at a bar Wednesday that had a sign out front saying "We survived a pandemic, we'll survive your shitty Yelp review". I kinda like that attitude. It's very East Coast. The West Coast isn't necessarily known as a "fuck you" kind of place, but more and more I got that old East Coast "fuck you" feeling. Maybe there's not that much difference between East and West like there used to be, maybe there never was. The Brahmins are now boomers with weed gummies and you have them on either coast.

Learning to fake emotion, I know that as a trauma thing. When someone is in an abuse situation. You don't get to be yourself. I was listening this morning, coincidentally, to _The Gouster_, from Bowie's "Who Can I Be Now?" The chameleon. Grew up queer with a schizophrenic brother.

(REDACTED):
I am a new person every day
It's called self improvement

Kate Cavatappi — Today at 8:52 AM:
or sometimes 4. Identity disturbance with markedly or persistently unstable self-image or sense of self

That's the thing. It's all about _them_, it's always all about _them_, and they don't understand what it's like for everybody else to have to put up with their bullshit without being able to hold them accountable, because they have all the power, always have. All their life. To me that's the difference between them and the people who are "mentally ill and/or addicted to drugs and/or depressed and/or desperate and/or chronically ill, and/or dying of terminal diseases", to be a "boomer" means not confronting any of that, believing that one's going to live until 150, believing that Your Generation ended racism and saved the world and that the people who hate you aren't treating you LIKE YOU DESERVE TO BE TREATED. But they never treat anybody else, you know. The way they think they _deserve to be treated_.

Kate Cavatappi — Today at 12:25 PM:
I've always tried to live by the "treat people as you want to be treated" kind of person. Unfortunately I used to kind of hate myself so that caused a lot of problems...

It's good to read your post. I was asking about it the other day here... Is it me? Is it only me who lives in this situation, who sees these people? Is it only Portland? And from what you say it's not. What you say makes me feel like desperate people are everywhere. It's just hard to talk about and acknowledge, without fear or shame, and so people don't want to talk about it.

It's that contrast. The boomers with all the records and the desperate people, and the former are the latter but with money.

-

we have a big queer woman population here of every age too and queer moms and non-moms alike also make up a good portion of our buyers. thank the heavens.

and non-binary people. and the like. lots of younger queer folks. they didn't used to be such a big part of our customer-base. a lot of things have changed in general here since the pandemic. people moved to the country. all kinds of people. which is an awesome by-product of a terrible thing.

i WAS kinda lumping sad gen x dads together though. i basically meant people who reminded me of myself. slow. world-weary. heavy sighs. maybe not so quick to look at the records underneath because it means bending.

― scott seward

i was never able to dad because gender dysphoria and all but slow, world-weary... again, that's the out of time thing, i always had these old man vibes... there's a picture of me from when i'm 20 where i'm look like a 50 year old chain-smoking golfer in 1971. but it's also interesting to know that, again. it's not just portland. the queer people. the pandemic babies. queerness has changed _so much_ over the course of the pandemic, and I don't know if it's coincidental or if the pandemic brought about a sea change.

for me the pandemic was... even more than trump, it's, what's the term? "stochastic incompetence"? stochastic incompetence changed my life.

-

i too really miss blogs. i had a blog between '20 and '22, a pandemic blog... it's the only way i can really write. i use ILX like a blog sometimes. i don't know what else to do, where else i can write that other human beings at least have a chance of reading. like i sad. i feel very out of time.

I read you, Kate! Thanks for the post! You can be who you are here. That's what I like about ILX. I don't have a lot of people I can talk to about a lot of things. In real life. I feel safe here! I also have therapist fear. I mean, I think it would benefit me. I could probably use a little of the ol' DBT. But I'm afraid to tell someone I don't know about my stuff. You know? Now I just wish i was starting a band so that i could call it Stochastic Incompetence.

hi scott! i too remember that seattle meet-up with great fondness, thank u for yr kind words :)

so long ago tho :(

But x many of us are still around! Not nec on ilx, but I hear things.

my thing that i posted here is in this. i still don't have a copy. i didn't even know it was out! my kinda editing situation. zero contact or involvement.

https://scontent-bos5-1.xx.fbcdn.net/v/t39.30808-6/462392090_10162249770432137_731882273653155772_n.jpg?_nc_cat=110&ccb=1-7&_nc_sid=bd9a62&_nc_ohc=_Jxe01W1TUsQ7kNvgE0FH1W&_nc_ht=scontent-bos5-1.xx&_nc_gid=AEIfPkAFGK6UHUlacf0YIBJ&oh=00_AYD0a0iK6-3OZ9EcQHNj9q573DVm-LwTjJIQxDIHWoDT8Q&oe=6709CACB

I did get my copy of that, it was great to read it (again)!

thanks! i have to find a copy.

Not sure if you have a Barnes & Noble near you, but they usually carry Maggot Brain now, I've seen it there.

yeah, that's a good spot to check. they are sold out online at the third man store.

Hadn't seen this one yet---Lucy Sante cover girl on another recent issue, so obvs. you and MBV and Neshell in good co.

*M*eshell!

nice to be in a magazine with my friend andy zax. and yeti mike of course.

yesterday was a big step for me. as i wrote on the antidepressant thread:

i feel hopeful. i feel like i want to be closer to people again!. its nuts. i was at the store all day by myself yesterday because maria was working a record show at wesleyan and i talked to people all day and had a really good time. awesome writer/rock crit icon/poet karen schoemer came in and we had a nice talk about writing and stuff. people like her inspire me so much. she has a band with friends of mine. i felt engaged and not weird or brittle like i'd been feeling for fucking ever. i realized how detrimental hiding in the back of the store for the last year or more and having maria out front has become. i never wanted to see anyone. it just perpetuated my depression.
the biggest miracle was Sunday afternoon. i went to a house party/show at my friend beverly's house and her awesome band Stella Kola played and other cool people played and then...i read! some of my stuff. in public! with a microphone! in front of, like, 20 people. for about 25 minutes. and people really liked it and i liked it and i was in a garage and the weather was nice and there were dogs and little kids and maria near me. and i wasn't drinking or anything and i felt fine and happy to be with friends who i never see because i never ever leave the house. i asked Beverly if i could read too. about a week ago. i knew that would make it so that i had to go. but i didn't dread it or stress about it. i had a very long and stressful and emotional week last week too. family death. my uncle's memorial and my sad beautiful cousins. my birthday that always makes me feel sad for unknown reasons. just thoughts of family. the people i love who are gone. my mom. my sister. i also worked a ton physically. so much that it hurt. but i got through it all. its not a black cloud covering me or following me. its something i just worked through.
i'm really ready for more of this. i really was working so hard to make myself better on my own for years and it wasn't working. its hard for me to ask for help. i'm so glad i did though. next stop...therapy.

― scott seward, Monday, October 7, 2024 4:36 AM (twelve hours ago

Rat on, hang in there!

good luck! that sounds promising!

thanks a lot you guys. hi sleeve. i forgot to add this here and i wanted to do that before the end of the year. i want to start my new year fresh. i feel like 2024/2025 was ALMOST too much for me but its getting better now with lots of work! in-person therapy every week since february! i never thought i would be able to do something like that. this link isn't one of the record store things. but i do mention ilx in it. thanks again to everyone. i hope everyone on here has a great holiday season and new year and that currents events don't drag people under. you just do what you can, right? i am still on facebook. peace out, SS #dorkswhosigntheirpostslikeitsafreakinemail

https://medium.com/p/af2fa6905a58

<3

Great piece. Sorry I loled at:

Without those constant self-negating mantras I have more time to focus on just being alive and looking forward to things for the first time ever. I also no longer hear the Chili’s baby back ribs jingle in my head. Something I heard at least once every week since 1997.

Really good piece, Scott. And second the recommendation for Sister Midnight, which is fuuuuucked up in all kinds of great ways. Loved that movie.

really liked both those pieces, ty Scott

mostly old voice stuff. just wanted some of the stuff i liked in one place. working on a big 80s thing right now. don't know if i can pull it off. i had an awesome reading with the insanely talented karen schoemer at unnameable books here. i wish you guys could have been there. karen's friend phil good read too. he was bernadette mayer's partner. i like reading in public now. its weird. peace and love to you all!

https://medium.com/@scottseward68/my-village-voice-years-the-origins-of-a-used-record-dealer-in-new-england-5cc913ae05fa

Peace Scott x

Thanks for making this available, but as a Canadian I have to ask:

supposed former infatuation junkie Robert Plant

were you conflating Alannah Myles and Alanis Morissette?

https://medium.com/p/c3737632bdc7

in the mid 90s, I couldn’t give away a copy of Rumours!

another great read, Scott.
plus a list of records to keep an eye out for, wonderful!

lol i felt so seen by the soundtrack comment

read last night at a show in the woods that some friends put together. my friend john from sunburned and my friend adam who plays with kurt vile played with this guy toshi who i had never met before and who was a part of the early 70s psych scene in japan. he played with flower travelin' band and others back in the day. liz durette played. she's so awesome. buy her feeding tube records. one-of-a-kind. and my friend shannon who is in the local powerhouse ANIMAL PISS ITS EVERYWHERE is in a new band that is awesome 90s britgaze. like ride? teenage fanclub with more feedback and spacemen3 vibes? they have a little of that early teenage fanclub vibe when they sounded more like a baby dinosaur jr. at times. does that make sense? anyway, they are very cool to hear live. a little baggy? like that chapterhouse-y guitar thing but without bowl cuts or clean clothing. maybe i need a new 90s binge to go on. that stuff sounds really good to me right about now. my kid was there. maria was there. even my therapist was there. saw so many people i like and respect. i felt good reading and good about what i read. i felt good in general. it was a nice night at the backwoods bar that is ONLY open on friday night(!!).
i hope everyone has a great summer. stay hydrated! if you need me for anything let me know. i'm around. love you all!
my friend bev and i (bev is in the mighty Stella Kola among other pursuits. Aguirre just reissued the Stella Kola debut which is amazing news because everyone needs that album. its some kinda masterpiece. the air is thick with great sounds here. and weed smoke.) were talking about finding a place to read in NYC together with a few others. we shall see. we are trying to think of options.
also, i'm going to be reading at an indie rock music fest at the beginning of september. i'll post more when i know more.
the thing last night was fun because there were about 40 people there for the show and then tons of locals who sat by the huge fire or who sat inside at the bar and got wasted and who did not give one fuck about us. i liked the mix.
it reminded me of when greg vegas from monsterland would put on shows at T.K.'s sports bar in Danbury in the early 90s and we would all be freaking out to truman's water or the swirlies or whoever and the other half of the place was dudes watching hockey or football and trying very hard not to make eye contact with us. we always overran the place. plus, we smelled like garbage cans. the freaks ruled the sports bar on sunday night.

https://www.facebook.com/photo?fbid=10164886535422137&set=pcb.10164886541802137

https://scontent-lga3-2.xx.fbcdn.net/v/t39.30808-6/715710297_10164886535437137_105920449249890298_n.jpg?stp=dst-jpg_tt6&cstp=mx1125x844&ctp=s1125x844&_nc_cat=105&ccb=1-7&_nc_sid=127cfc&_nc_ohc=0wdaFaRnQxcQ7kNvwE0TQpr&_nc_oc=Adrcz4hK7AdppRF57E-tGn_nlZbw-zfmayD85cZRvejKA7-v6GXOqiEsKehTUTuTAII&_nc_zt=23&_nc_ht=scontent-lga3-2.xx&_nc_gid=fRnTDdmeaCNwEh0JzhQWBg&_nc_ss=7b2a8&oh=00_Af99aOdRc5a0e-THlYNcbM2wbGlB9p-VOXWIWrPjy6LA8A&oe=6A2A53C1

sorry for spamming the board. i just saw this. i will be reading on the 2nd day. peace.

https://media.brooklynvegan.com/xxrzsfjkyw/uploads/2026/06/09/dromfest2026.jpg

That's a great lineup. have fun!

Amazed to see there are versions of Scrawl, Antietam, Nice Strong Arm, Hypnolovewheel and Dumptruck on the go! It's like the Camden Record & Tape Exchange circa 1988 £1 bin fest. Good luck all and enjoy!

yeah i was going to ask, is that festival really in 2026?

it’s like Trouser Press Record Guide, the festival