thread for KING CHARLES III (regnal name george vii)

I keep seeing ads for this new google pixel phone with a "best take" phone camera function, if they had just said they used that then the story would have disappeared immediately.

this particular misunderstanding of AI worries me more than any of the "misinformation" stuff.

otm

She's stripping in Ibiza, fulfilling a lifelong ambition and a notch in her bucket list

Everyone in the UK died three weeks ago. If this isn't true it would be easy to disprove, but no one has done so yet!

doesnt really look like either of them in that video

the wife beater will theory is a good one

We know he has a violent streak and hair trigger temper.

My wife's pitch for a thriller: the royal family has Kate killed and replaces her with a near-perfect lookalike, and no one suspects ... except her kids. "Something is wrong with mummy ... " I can totally envision a sequence in the underlit palace, with the kids scared and running and hiding and nu-Kate in menacingly calm pursuit, like the end of "The Shining." "Mummy loves you, just give her a hug ... "

Throw in a dirgey chorale cover of an Oasis track, and Wife In Chicago has a Greenlight from Blumhouse.

Heard one today at work that I hadn't heard before - that Kate is being harvested for organs to keep Charles alive

William maybe...

It's an island. Everyone on it is related enough for the parts to be a match.

This is the list of what William's done since the start of the year. 13 'engagements' over 12 weeks, one which is a private meeting and one which is a night out at the BAFTAs. For this we pay him more than £25m a year. #AbolishTheMonarchy https://t.co/3Qb1Kx73o7 pic.twitter.com/RcXcTYHGpO

— Republic (@RepublicStaff) March 19, 2024

come on, the man has to take care of three photoshopped children all on his own now

Heard one today at work that I hadn't heard before - that Kate is being harvested for organs to keep Charles alive

― Humanitarian Pause (Tracer Hand)

oh _organs_ i thought you said "orgasms"

EXCLUSIVE | Kate Middleton’s return to public life will be marked with a “big bang” return to the limelight on Easter Sunday, March 31, friends of the royals have told The Daily Beast. https://t.co/Ahfgg4gE39

— The Daily Beast (@thedailybeast) March 19, 2024

this just in: kate is in seclusion completing prep work on her suicide vest ahead of her brief but eventful return to public life

blasted out of a cannon

please folks, I kindly implore you to not post phrases like "big bang" and "blasted out of a cannon" right after a post involving Charles and orgasms.

*london philharmonic plays*

BAH GAWD THAT'S KATE MIDDLETON'S MUSIC

Sounds blas(t)phemous, tbh.

https://www.thedailybeast.com/kate-middleton-plans-big-bang-easter-sunday-return-to-public-life?ref=scroll - can someone who makes animated gifs make her eyelid twitch please

https://static.wikia.nocookie.net/simpsons/images/6/68/Tom_jones.png/revision/latest/scale-to-width-down/500?cb=20121216015331

eh whatever it's smithers holding a gun to tom jones

come on, the man has to take care of three photoshopped children all on his own now

I properly laughed at this.

It just takes some time
Even though Kate Middleton just had to die
Everything, everything will be just fine
Everything, everything will be alright, alright

Buckingham Palace hiring £25k communications assistant as scrutiny continues into royal handling of Kate Middleton rumours https://t.co/ifcrQuCVkq

— LBC (@LBC) March 20, 2024

£25K pa in London? You would have to supplement your income by, I don't know, selling stories to the press?

— Frank Kelly (@frantechno) March 20, 2024

do they not already employ many pr people? whats going on here

I can think of a quick, easy and free way to solve this PR disaster. Or at least it would be quick, easy and free if she were not dead.

It's hard not to view these rumors as the online version of those beach balls that get bounced around by crowds in stadiums and arenas. When the game or the show gets too boring the beach balls get more active.

Tbf, it's more like one of those cases where beach balls have been thrown from the stage to encourage said behavior.

its just a nice thing who doesnt like hitting beach ball

from way over here on the west coast of North America the idea that this latest fiasco was a poorly handled public relations disaster completely overlooks the fact that the entire royal family has been a public relations disaster for at least three decades and the anti-royal sentiment being expressed atm is a permanent feature of life in the UK, not a thing they can suppress through a cannier PR strategy

whoops

So, due to the #KateGate / #WhereIsKate missing Kate Middleton / Princess of Wales #Katespiracy drama, lots of people around the world have increased interest in Rose Hanbury and her mysterious connection to Prince William.

Unfortunately, people in China looked a little too… pic.twitter.com/sGTfoIzkro

— Grannybelly 🌕 (@sugabelly) March 19, 2024

The opium trade surely to be the next major crime of the British Empire to come under scrutiny - and not before time.

fuckin hell never knew the british stole stuff

this changes everything

I'm in favour of getting us all hooked on opium, hopefully it will make reparations go down a bit easier

god look at those fucking parasites

Using AI to make their necks even more choppable. They’re laughing at us

a new opium craze might help put a dent in this whole fentanyl thing, it's a healthier alternative

if Britain is to cede a territory to the CCP in this hypothetical lost Opium War 2.0 then I'm moving there, even if it's fucking Norwich. I'll take my chances with the social credit system and a firewalled internet as long as I can get a dentist.

Isle of Wight plus Hayling Island, Portsmouth, Gosport and everything up to the river Hamble, Southampton can be Shenzen

Seems fair, we stole Hong Kong off them after all.

word reaches me that ‘at 6 pm there is going to be an announcement that a famous person has cancer and has received treatment’

start yr speculations here

Ben 10

Ben X surely?

Get well soon Paddington

it's Kate

The Princess of Wales has disclosed that she has been diagnosed with cancer and is in the early stages of receiving chemotherapy treatment.

In a statement recorded at Windsor by the BBC, Catherine said her condition had been discovered after she had major abdominal surgery in January.

After weeks of speculation about her health, Catherine said she and her husband, Prince William, had needed time to explain the situation to their three children, George, 10, Charlotte, eight, and Louis, five.

so was that her at the garden centre or not

Looked a bit peely-wally to me.