thread for KING CHARLES III (regnal name george vii)

(xp) William's exact words on hearing the news.

A government-appointed inquiry team named Crown Prince Dipendra as perpetrator of the massacre. Dipendra slipped into a coma after shooting himself in the head. Dipendra was declared King of Nepal while comatose after the death of King Birendra.

Now that's a scenario. Shooting your family, then yourself in the head, and continuing to reign in a comatose state for 15-20 years. Really ups the ante on anti-monarchic sentiments, just behind xyzzzz's wish for a string of 3-day reigns resulting in a year of bank holidays.

This thread is very death metal

The Nepalis abolished the monarchy a few years later.

Gawd bless you sir

I can't stop thinking about #PrinceWilliam right now. His mother died when he was young. His lovely wife has been sick. His father now has Cancer. And now he has to deal with his jealous brother scheming around. Continue to be strong my great future King. #PrinceWilliamIsAKing pic.twitter.com/uGwTCSoSDT

— stormy seas (@BillyDouglass7) February 5, 2024

... the big C indeed.

https://rlv.zcache.co.uk/i_hope_you_die_thank_you_card-rcc70edb1dab349058dba6769cfc9e854_udf2n_492.jpg

I've already sent him a card (with anthrax spores in it)

xxxp re Nepal it was probably thought best to leave it after all that unpleasantness, which in a better world would also be the approach taken with the British monarchy

love the tasteful crop on that pic of wills which carefully elides his upsetting baldness

it doesn't work, because he is spiritually bald

credit where credit's due, the royals' multi-generational experiment to create increasingly awful forms of baldness is really paying off on the scalp of the heir apparent

no hair apparent amirite

ilxor dot com poster DESTROYS william, prince of wales

it's sad because we do it to ourselves

tracer you need stay out on this imo you have a full thriving head of locks

men should go back to periwigs

I reckon they're snuffing him out to save the monarchy from itself. probably the same crew who did diana

Really ups the ante on anti-monarchic sentiments, just behind xyzzzz's wish for a string of 3-day reigns resulting in a year of bank holidays.

― Nabozo, Tuesday, 6 February 2024 bookmarkflaglink

We've had 3 x PMs in a year. Don't think this is a lot to ask tbh

The line of Royal Succession as it stands:

1. The Prince of Wales
2. Prince George of Wales
3. Princess Charlotte of Wales
4. Prince Louis of Wales
5. The Duke of Sussex
6. Prince Archie of Sussex
7. Princess Lilibet of Sussex
8. The Duke of York
9. Princess Beatrice, Mrs. Edoardo Mapelli Mozzi
10. Miss Sienna Mapelli Mozzi
11. Princess Eugenie, Mrs. Jack Brooksbank
12. Master August Brooksbank
13. Master Ernest Brooksbank
14. The Duke of Edinburgh
15. Earl of Wessex
16. The Lady Louise Mountbatten-Windsor
17. The Princess Royal
18. Mr. Peter Phillips
19. Miss Savannah Phillips
20. Miss Isla Phillips
21. Mrs. Michael Tindall
22. Miss Mia Tindall
23. Miss Lena Tindall
24. Master Lucas Tindall

Did that from memory

nerd

Wonder what number I am

King Noodle, Vegas lounge singer

25. Master Bloby

32. Mr. Gareth "Gaz" Coombes

Just need to get rid of numbers 1 to 4 for a full-on popular revolution.

wait, there could be a "King Archie" someday?

There's been one of those already.

https://i2-prod.dailyrecord.co.uk/incoming/article1429521.ece/ALTERNATES/s1200b/Archie%20Gemmill%20scores%20for%20Scotland

Princess Royal is no.8, she and her progeny are ahead of Prince Andrew and his now, it got changed a few years back, because of Woke

And missed off 25. John Goodman

26. Sir Mixalot

the banter timeline demands that king charles iii (regnal name king george vii) dies within a month, king william dies falling down the stairs of westminster abbey immediately after he is crowned, and the boy king george begins his reign of terror before the year is out

I'm on Team Savannah

Princess Royal is no.8, she and her progeny are ahead of Prince Andrew and his now, it got changed a few years back, because of Woke

Seemingly not retrospectively applied? Or not so far up the chain anyway. Davina Windsor and Rose Gilman's kids (born early 2010s, girl then boy in each case) got flipped in order after the new rule, but John ReidAnne didn't get bumped up. I have no idea who any of these people are.

they're our betters iirc

I like how they all have stupid titles and Zara is basically "Mike Tindall's missus"

What if Sienna Mapelli Mozzi went on a murderous rampage, like Alec Guiness in "Kind Hearts and Coronets"?

I have no insight into the constitutional or political repercussions, but. That would be pretty fucking badass.

feel like alec guinness was the one (or many) NOT going on a murderous rampage tbrr

Unfortunate n-word usage in the final scene of Kind Hearts and Coronets too, a perfect template for multiple regicide*.

* Is it regicide when you're bumping off the presumptive heirs and not the regent?

I don’t know who most of these ppl are, but thread has delivered excellent lols nevertheless. Keep up the good work, britishes!

Pregicide

The royals should capitalize on the success of Netflix’s The Last Kingdom and bring back Aethlings. And people whose names use that ae character.

Wiliæm

Kæþerine

Ændrew

PÆdophile

Unfortunate n-word usage

Not an uncommon occurrence in the British Royal Family I'd have thought.

lol (xp)

Question: Am I reading the list correctly that William's children are ahead of Harry in succession? Is that because he "bowed out" of the royalty or is that the way it normally works?

That’s the way it normally works

Yeah, it's how William and Harry were always ahead of Charles's siblings when the queen was queen.

Bring back the good old days when jealous uncles would murk little shits who stood in their way.

King Charles trying to cure cancer https://t.co/cWEIJ2u1UV pic.twitter.com/BQT9JaTibR

— Micky D (@DeMickyD) February 7, 2024