Blue Saturday

well yeah, that's one of the reasons it seemed best to mostly abandon this thread

i'm weirded out sometimes now by what feels almost like performing my age. it probably doesn't belong on the pile of things that are actually bad and make me sad tho

akshully maybe the majority of things that are making me sad now are things that people in their mid-fifties don't have to deal with if they made better life choices than me

Sometimes when I’m half awake I think of a pleasant memory from 20 years ago and it puts me in a nice relaxed state and I fall back asleep

i wonder if we can all do this but forget that we can do it when we're too focused on the downers

Houellebecq wrote in one of his worst novels when ruminating on nostalgia that the present is like an "abscess of suffering" we have to drag about with us, caught between the infinities of happiness and peace that are the past and the future. It was one of them beautifully concise lines of writing that rung a bell with me at the time and stuck with me, wasn't so sure about him including the future in this though!