Donald Trump: Classic or Dud?

Unfortunately the only justice we'll ever actually see will come when his heart finally gives out on his 187th consecutive fast food meal.

Hopefully that will happen when he’s on the toilet

A la Elvis

Hopefully that will happen when he’s on the toilet

No no, I want to see this onstage at CPAC, I want to see every moment of it

He might be on the toilet at CPAC

And the walls might fall over, like in Jurassic Park.

Trump gets really lucky with opponents sometimes

Not with this one he doesn't:

NEW: Trump's lawyers are warning him to get ready for a *federal* indictment, and soonhttps://t.co/zwxprl6mkj

— Noah Shachtman (@NoahShachtman) May 25, 2023

The article more or less says the lawyers want him to "get ready" because it would be stupid to be caught flat-footed and unprepared when the smart alternative is to prepare for it, even if it doesn't happen. Duh. Of course lawyers would give that advice. It's the right advice.

If by 'get ready' they meant 'prepare an array of personal assaults to lob at any potential judge and/or their family members once the hammer drops', I think he's on the case.

"Get ready" in the sense that "I Gotta Feeling" is a song about getting ready.

sir your only chance of beating this is to bring up Hunter Biden some more

countdown to a string of posts predicting nothing will happen and these warnings to get ready are just a gambit by Trump to get clicks

sir your only chance of beating this is to bring up Hunter Biden some more

― frogbs, Thursday, May 25, 2023 5:28 PM (one hour ago) bookmarkflaglink

This is cracking me up so much.

hunter biden has his father’s love but is fucked up and found real drugs, donald jr. is just fucked up and never found father’s love

hey that's unfair its p clear Don Jr has found real drugs too

https://www.nbcnews.com/news/us-news/trump-bucks-promise-wealth-maga-loyalty-lose-thousands-rcna84965

John Amann told NBC News he bought $2,200 worth of Trump Bucks and other items over the past year only to discover they were worthless when he tried to cash them in at his local bank. So he’s gone on Twitter to warn other Trump supporters not to fall for this scam.

“The buck stops with you”

But on social media and in promotional videos — many featuring faked celebrity endorsements — the sellers have tapped an audience that believes Trump’s ouster was part of a great conspiracy and that by investing in the Trump Rebate Banking System, or TRB for short, Trump will reward their loyalty by making them rich.

Is there a name for when your manufactured alternate reality collides with actual reality?

hilariousness

at the grocery store yesterday there was a copy of the National Enquirer that had "SEX CREEP TRUMP" in big block letters so I guess they've turned on him too

That’s an endorsement

BRB starting a "have you been scammed by a Trump scammer, give me some money and I'll get your money back for you, by the way I am JFK" scam

"Send us $5000 and we will make sure Donald Trump is included in the updated version of 'We Didn't Start the Fire.'"

when jfk jr is revealed as the executioner of the traitor(s) ___ ___ at guantánamo bay, all holders of trump bucks will be made whole

on one hand, I have a family member who used to volunteer in my state's consumer protection bureau and have sympathy for credulous people who get scammed by fly-by-night operators

on the other hand, the Trump faithful have enjoyed being marks for so many years now it's hard to be surprised when they're enthusiastic about promises that have a zero percent chance of panning out. magic beans!

Dud

very dud

Some people say, Dud.

This is a big stephen miller thing... seems like you'd need to, IDK, maybe pass a constitutional amendment or something, a tall order for his first day back at work

Trump pledges to end birthright citizenship on first day in office

can't stop won't stop

Trump trashes Kayleigh McEnany. pic.twitter.com/aylP807XKF

— Ron Filipkowski (@RonFilipkowski) May 31, 2023

On the birthright citizenship, there's a whole "originalist" argument that the 14th amendment was never meant to apply to the children of undocumented immigrants. It's a contentious theory to put it mildly, but fuck knows how all those Federalist Society creeps would rule on it. I assume the goal of an order like that would be to get it in front of SCOTUS and see how far they're willing to go.

That the citizenship argument advanced during the most conservative Supreme Court of all time tells you something about this bunch of psychos.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/United_States_v._Wong_Kim_Ark

"Milktoast" LOL.

The one thing you can count on when you board the Trump Train is, eventually you will be thrown off.

"We will also make sure that we get a reckoning with respect to the policies that the federal government enacted vis-a-vis COVID-19."

— David Weigel (@daveweigel) May 31, 2023

Desantis really did go to Harvard, huh?

Of course -- he used "with respect to" and "vis-a-vis"

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lj3iNxZ8Dww

Shitter's full https://t.co/dfxIK8sOe1

— Jeff Timmer (@jefftimmer) May 31, 2023

This is just a real nice surprise, a real nice surprise

picture unrelated

At the very least, he's not paying for a blue checkmark

https://www.cnn.com/2023/05/31/politics/trump-tape-classified-document-iran-milley/index.html

New: Trump acknowledged he retained a classified Pentagon document in an audio tape obtained by Special Counsel Jack Smith — confirming CNN. Our sources indicate this doc was classified at the SECRET level, the kind of doc DOJ would be inclined to charge.

— Hugo Lowell (@hugolowell) May 31, 2023

The classification of this document is important — if it was too important to acknowledge and release publicly, DOJ might not be able to use it at trial.

As @secretsandlaws discusses often, NatSec prosecutors look for documents that are classified but not *too* important. https://t.co/NQZccUfKpE

— Renato Mariotti (@renato_mariotti) May 31, 2023

In other words, he's right on track to be charged in ... 2027 or something.

Seems like the legal woes are really closing in on him pt.94, meanwhile he's about to run for President again

they finally got him

Increasingly isolated

They also had him on tape with a foreign president threatening to withhold aid unless he interfered in the US election. Still remained president after that one, lmao

This is the most maddening part of the durham report. Like—ok, it seems he didn’t solicit election interference from russia, which is what mueller concluded anyway. (If that investigation was a set up it didn’t work very well). But he still did solicit help from ukraine, using taxpayer money as leverage. It’s like the false accusation gave him the idea to do it for real.

Yeah, but he was, like, totally impeached for that.

I know but like

totally impeached