Elon Musk

wonder if elon is drinking caffeine free diet coke because he’s on too many uppers generally (as has been speculated itt)

oops

SCOOP: Twitter didn't pay its current and former employees on time in the UK and Germany today. “It has come to our attention that some of you may not have received your November 2022 salary yet in your bank account,” an email sent this morning says.

— Chris Stokel-Walker ~ @sto✧✧✧@info✧✧✧.excha✧✧✧ (@stokel) November 28, 2022

Truly strange situations going on next to the beds of Elon Musk fans pic.twitter.com/qqiXUejEEf

— Ed Zitron (@edzitron) November 28, 2022

Caffeine free diet coke is for people who had a diet coke habit and are now trying to cut down on caffeine. People who drink diet coke drink a lot if it.

― treeship., Monday, 28 November 2022 17:23 (twenty-eight minutes ago) bookmarkflaglink

ooh i have one of those pink rock-salt lamps (first pic)

it's not by my bed tho (it sheds salt everywhere and is not long for this world i think)

i have none of the other things

i keep an anton chigurh gun next to my bed

I am reluctant to defend this dum dum, and I think Musk is a bad troll, but the bedside table photo is likely a pun akin to "let that sink in." That is, his bedside table is cluttered with guns and coke. Get it, har har?

crystal lamps are entirely respectable and have no business being on that guy's bedstand. i bet a girlfriend is responsible for them.

Apple has mostly stopped advertising on Twitter. Do they hate free speech in America?

— Elon Musk (@elonmusk) November 28, 2022

and another thing: im not mad. please dont put in the newspaper that i got mad.

— wint (@dril) December 29, 2014

Apple doesn't hate free speech, it hates anything free.

trying to bully the biggest company in the world should go well

I'm beginning to feel like Musk is stealing Trump's thunder among the absolutely fucking broken and worthless dickhole quotient of America who like their celebrities to be toxic, racist and awful.

Probably a good thing he can't run for president.

People still talking about the Tesla phone like it’s real 😭

hes def trying but like most trump imitators hes just got no game

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0csRUZ_l41Y

https://flux.community/matthew-sheffield/2022/11/elon-musk-ideology-libertarian-effective-altruism-far-right/

Relevant MuskChat on Silicon Valley, dumbass infantile libertarianism, and Twitter culture scolds who couldn’t exist were it not for all the users they claim to hate on the network they claim to hate

Barq's root beer has caffeine

o fuk

at least with Trump there was some strange sort of charisma there, like he was a WWE heel. Elon is not only pathetic he's also incredibly boring

yeah doing a trump isnt that easy elon thinks he has the juice cause he was the beneficiary of a well executed pr campaign, but this is a whole other thing

xxpost Yeah, "Barq's has Bite."

Trump legitimately funny though. No try-hard photos for this king

The Coca Cola company is not happy with me--that's okay, I'll still keep drinking that garbage.

— Donald J. Trump (@realDonaldTrump) October 16, 2012

That's, like, Trump Classic though. The old formula.

Musk tells a colleague of mine that Apple is threatening Twitter’s standing in the App Store. Explains his string of tweets just now critiquing Apple. https://t.co/8FsbZENYRL

— Alex Heath (@alexeheath) November 28, 2022

Apple has also threatened to withhold Twitter from its App Store, but won’t tell us why

— Elon Musk (@elonmusk) November 28, 2022

re: failure to make payroll, they have employees in like 30 countries and no meaningful payroll department https://www.businessinsider.com/twitter-payroll-finance-department-resigns-en-masse-under-elon-musk-2022-11.

they should just put a big bowl of cash by the door and you take some when you leave every day

Time to invent that phone!

he’s gotta put a camera in a hammer before that, sorry first come first served

this man is very silly, who knows if apple has actually threatened twitter with removal from the app store but if they did they did they certainly said why

they should just put a big bowl of cash by the door and you take some when you leave every day

Negotiating in public, always a good tactic. He doesn't seem to fully understand that nobody has to be on Twitter.

xp eh, it wouldn't be the first time. apple has history of either giving inscrutable reasons, or refusing to give reasons for rejections.

ironically prte-musk twitter did a much better job of designing an enforcable moderation policy and enacting it in a way that people understood than apple has ever done.

they didnt reject twitter tho, musks story is they called him up and threatened to do it and when he asked why they laughed and hung up, doesnt make much sense the whole point of a threat is to extract a concession

musk's story is a couple of engagement bait tweets that ask more questions than they answer

theyre nonsense

I kind of love the idea of some Apple execs calling him on speakerphone and being like "Nyaaaah, we're gonna kick you out of our app store! How you like THEM Apples? Hahahahaha!"

*muffled speakerphone laughter, fumbled hangup*

I mean Tim Apple just took a hatchet to Facebook’s entire bottom line and crying foul didn’t really change the outcome. But sure let’s try to fuck around and find out.

— Jason Goldman (@goldman) November 28, 2022

lol otm

based on the timeline what id guess happened is musk starts bitching about apple cutting back on advertising, someone asks him if apple has threatened twitters spot in the app store, they have not but it seems like a good thing to bitch about so musk says yes and then proceeded to bitch about it

which doesnt mean apple couldnt reach the conclusion that twitter is under moderated at some point, but seems unlikely that were there yet

nothing brings back the day to day numbing banal dumbness of the trump years harder than "tim apple"

Next version of iOS blocks all advertising on the Twitter app regardless of whether you use it or not

So getting kicked off the App Store probably would actually be a MAE under the merger agreement? Lol. Lmao.

— Quantian (@quantian1) November 28, 2022

Now we get to see if the bond indentures were drafted as carefully as Twitter’s contracts were.

— Quantian (@quantian1) November 28, 2022

iiuc this is saying twitter's loans could be contingent on not doing something like "getting kicked out of the app store"? that would be funny.

nothing brings back the day to day numbing banal dumbness of the trump years harder than "tim apple"

― Clay, Monday, November 28, 2022 2:20 PM (two minutes ago) bookmarkflaglink

lmao tim apple goes in the greatest hits for sure

"All Boring had to do was bring its machine (named Godot) and start digging, former Maryland officials said. But months, and then years, passed. Maryland was waiting for Godot." pic.twitter.com/XOGQqeY9AS

— Eliot Brown (@eliotwb) November 28, 2022

And Marilyn LockHEED

Did you know Apple puts a secret 30% tax on everything you buy through their App Store? https://t.co/LGkPZ4EYcz

— Elon Musk (@elonmusk) November 28, 2022

did Elon seriously pay $44,000,000,000 for Twitter without knowing this

shh its a secret

this might be giving him too much credit, but 1) of course he knows 2) that is a tweet designed to go viral with the help of people who think he's stupid. trump was good at that.