queen elizabeth II

wife's breast cancer appointment cancelled Monday, which means all breast cancer appointments are cancelled on Monday. She has a new one in a month. I'm sure she'll be fine, but that's a wait that will almost certainly cost lives. This is an obscenity, in the name of the monarchy

— matt (@matted1) September 13, 2022

@GrieveWatch Vue cinemas will be open on Monday for the funeral. Only the funeral. Vueneral, if you will. pic.twitter.com/Aq4Z828Zfg

— mr blobby fan account (@duckpyjamas) September 13, 2022

5 fucking hours? Nolan has gone too far this time

are they covering the wake and all?

IM:HMQE 1 was good, but kind of dated

I assume a lot of this is due to the bank holiday being "well your employer may or may not force you to work it BUT all the schools will be closed" - not the Vueneral though.

odds on Brian May playing on the roof of the Abbey?

An interview with the Nigerian-American prof on her story.

https://www.theguardian.com/uk-news/2022/sep/14/uju-anya-queen-nigeria-colonialism-empire?

I hope we don't have to wait so long for Bezos to die.

I like the way she has handled this, totally unapologetic and no whining self-pity about getting dragged and locked out of twitter.

Imagine the convos you will get

Government warns of 30-hour queues to see Queen's coffin https://t.co/VH6rUQQVcy

— BBC News (UK) (@BBCNews) September 14, 2022

UK to population: "pssst, wanna see a dead body?"

Well it'll take a bunch of twats out of circulation for 30 hours, so all good.

Hearing someone describing BBC News coverage as Mourn Hub has made my day.

— chrisbates (@christhemarxist) September 14, 2022

Wouldn't it be easier to drive the coffin around for a few days so everyone can see it? Take it to Barking and Edmonton or wherever too, let all her loyal subjects join in. In fact they could spend the next couple of months trundling it around the country as the cadaver decays and starts to seep out the cracks, while the Beeb continue their wall-to-wall coverage as a distraction from imminent mass starvation.

YouMourn

trundling it around the country ... imminent mass starvation

Might be the opportunity for a two-birds-one-stone solution here...thinking...thinking...

I literally can’t believe this isn’t satire pic.twitter.com/Uv4uYKiwB8

— Aíne (@ainemagu) September 14, 2022

I wont a ham burger mate!!! Oi! This is wank!

— wint (@dril) September 14, 2022

Out of respect for the Royal Family all Life Support machines in the Ilford South Hospital have been turned off

— Jimothy Baker (@JimothyBaker) September 14, 2022

https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-62900500

Will log on.

How do you pay virtual respects, walk past your laptop or something?

Send a Superchat

It will be available on the BBC home page, the BBC News website and app, the iPlayer, BBC Parliament and Red Button.

“the iPlayer” jesus fuckin wept

The Queen is bigger than Jesus.

trigger warning: it's a corpse!

It's hard to manufacture the sacred these days, and the more they try to pump up theawe the more ridiculous it becomes.

Wait, so day 6-9 is an open coffin, this says? I somehow doubt that

https://observer.com/2022/09/the-queen-is-dead-heres-what-happens-next/

Petition to get Demi, who was in charge of the Center Parcs Twitter feed this afternoon, a knighthood. https://t.co/cGVM2P7URX

— John Bull (@garius) September 13, 2022

Xp why, it’s not like she died in a messy car crash

https://www.thelist.com/1006153/why-queen-elizabeths-funeral-doesnt-have-an-open-casket/

+ lead lined so she doesn't escape

she isn't in there at all

still ranging round the palace being rasputined

THE QUEEN ISNT EVEN OPEN CASKET??? literally what are people queuing for if you can’t critique the embalmer’s work

— natalie (@scaredofcustard) September 14, 2022

Celtic are playing again

Banner unfurled in the Celtic end 10 minutes before kick off: “F*** the crown.”

As the Champions League anthem plays, it’s followed by: “Sorry for your loss Michael Fagan.” pic.twitter.com/AxRNO3YWME

— Archie Rhind-Tutt (@archiert1) September 14, 2022

Rangers v. Napoli later could be interesting too.

badly written article delivers distressing news:
https://www.middleeasteye.net/news/queen-elizabeth-not-related-prophet-muhammad

they don't even follow up on the fact that the story was invented by sir iain moncrieff of that ilk (who i am always pleased yo hear about as he wrote a guide to heraldry that i greatly liked as a small boy (it had funny pictures)

http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-w_TFO3G1OQI/UIxoydZyJFI/AAAAAAAAB2k/1l09M3kGjoQ/s640/IMG_0004.jpg

Is this what heaven looks like?

Class. @RangersFC 🙏🏼 pic.twitter.com/yHSRIecfAb

— Don Hutchison (@donhutch4) September 14, 2022

Are the pubs shut on Monday?

The country is shut on Monday.

The ones that will be open will be blaring this shit

Pray for me, who has a long train journey to make on Monday and no real knowledge of whether it will be possible.

Praying for all of us

This is cold, not fair at all.

Bashar Al-Assad, Nicolas Maduro and the Taliban are snubbed from Queen's funeral guest list https://t.co/aP6t6Qg06G

— Daily Mail U.K. (@DailyMailUK) September 14, 2022

Venezuelan tyrant Nicolas Maduro will not be invited to the attend the historic passing of the Second Elizabethan Age

One must be the correct class of tyrant

Trump getting his black suit cleaned

What a bunch of cunts

BREAKING: Despite UEFA declining a request, the national anthem will be sung in honour of the Queen before Rangers' Champions League game against Napoli tonight. pic.twitter.com/se7l0EjqCT

— Sky Sports News (@SkySportsNews) September 14, 2022

Unhappy with the pace of the queue. I've counted 1,789 people for the last hour. So on that number only 235489 people will get to pay there respects. #TheQueue needs to deliver for the people. Gutted if u queued for 2 days and found out your number 235490. God Save The Queue! pic.twitter.com/op8WJa6yad

— Richard Wood (@woodyis) September 14, 2022