thread for KING CHARLES III (regnal name george vii)

the uk press have been sitting on stories about will's alleged infidelity for years now, so wills' ramrod compliance may be lubricated by a fear of being thrust onto tabloid front pages under straplines about his bedroom preferences

Yeah seems like a bit of a shoogly peg for the institution

sad to see royalty forced into a prostate position like that

A far cry from the previously dominant position.

i think he's just really anal about details

just a square peg in a round hole I guess

I confess that this american is (with some guilt) delighted with the lol opportunities presented by KCIII. Sorry, UK, really I am, but also good god the tragicomedy. . .

I mean we gave you Trump (also sorry about that), surely it was your turn.

tabloid features from the 80s make the best heads of state, trust us

lol i fucking told you

'Judging the right moment for a joke is always tricky...'

My latest cartoon for tomorrow's @Telegraph

Subscribe to my weekly newsletter to receive my unseen cartoons: https://t.co/JNDhrYJMFH pic.twitter.com/AhAJmld9TB

— Matt Cartoons (@MattCartoonist) September 12, 2022

that's the power you wield when you are the UK's richest sketcher of cock-noses

nashwan otm, William will be more palatable to the average subject (because he is more palatable to the papers, as evidence: the last decade of papers)

move fast! break things!

King Charles’s staff given redundancy notice during church service for Queen

Exclusive by ⁦@PippaCrerar⁩ and ⁦@ccdavies⁩ https://t.co/nAcSngcBAI

— Owen Gibson (@owen_g) September 13, 2022

psyched for some wild stories from disgruntled former employees

this man hates pens

How is this real? How is this public?! pic.twitter.com/dZlsNOVREI

— Nooruddean (@BeardedGenius) September 13, 2022

He is going to machine gun the rest of the Royals

he has wanted this for 60+ years and already he hates it *so much*

*prepares the popcorn*

imagine taking the King to a fucking employment tribunal, you'd end up having to pay his legal fees and 10 years of your paltry wages back to him and then get birched for having the effrontery

maybe charles will take the monarchy to a tribunal for constructive dismissal

Lol, what a loser.

Wonder if support for the Monarchy will collapse, he clearly can't keep his mouth shut.

doesnt exactly have the common touch does he

His Majesty is not used to getting ink on his fingers, and it's ruined his entire bloody day.

You can see exactly why his mother stayed in post till her literal death, can’t you

Amazing, simply amazing.

Camilla doing a much better job at this stuff

So the Duchy of Lancaster passes to Charles, and that of Cornwall to Prince William. Did they observe proper protocol, which is to pass the duchy on the left-hand side?

He probably thinks hating pens makes him seem down to earth

xpost This generation
Rules the nation

Ps the amount of people going WELL HE’S JUST LOST HIS MUM as though the guy didn’t literally give interviews saying he was “running out of time”.

All true heads of state use Sharpies.

Fucking pens, how do they work?

the most amazing video I've watched this year

I was working at a recruitment company in Piccadilly when the Queen Mother died, and even before her funeral, the staff were on the phone asking if we had vacancies for cooks, dressers, gardeners, you name it. They were all about to be made homeless. https://t.co/zLSH592cXW

— Elvis Buñuelo (@Mr_Considerate) September 13, 2022

The Duke of York will be a Counsellor of State for the new king. pic.twitter.com/qZPdhjwUjM

— PoliticsJOE (@PoliticsJOE_UK) September 14, 2022

You know what, this is a fair point. Does Charles not bleed? does he not weep at the moonlight? Does his heart not soar when listening to Coldplay? He is one of Us, a flawed, scared sack of bones trying to make the best of existence on this rainy fascist island https://t.co/XKs34NkeD7

— Y (@tinshh) September 14, 2022

King Charles, died 2022 by literally not being able to breathe for being criticised

I'm curious about how the 2 videos of Charles looking grumpy got released. Leaked by a disgruntled member of staff?

can't have 24-7 adoring rolling coverage if you keep binning the material

also i'm guessing there wasn't a need until now to have a full-time tantrum editor keeping a watchful eye, his mum was a seasoned professional who self-edited like a beast -- while her son is a self-important crank weirdo who thinks he knows everything and badly wants to be as beloved but is also angrily terrified he never will be (clue: he never will be)

i also think there's a strong dose of "at last i can be myself!" -- he's spent like forty years biting his lip to not blurt -- and he's discovering this is not going to play at all well, the uninterrupted performance of low-key naturalness is harder work than it looked! turns out laurens van der post doesn't prepare one!

its true the queen was a real pro she encountered tens of thousands of people in her role and seemingly all of them were like she was gracious she asked me about myself and seemed to actually care credit where its due

throwing multiple public fits about pens in your first week on the job is pretty far on the other end of the spectrum

each finger segment a Fall Guy, racing to drown itself in the inkwell

Is there going to be a separate ten day mourning period to mourn the crowning of Charles

He's already causing trouble with the royalty of other nations

https://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/8/8b/Conversations_with_Queen.jpg

Reading the Wikipedia page for Diana’s funeral (which I didn’t watch)

Alastair Campbell later revealed in his diaries that the government and the royal household feared for the security of Prince Charles, believing that he would possibly get attacked by the crowd, thus they ensured that he would be accompanied by his sons. Prince Philip, the Duke of Edinburgh, initially opposed the idea of William and Harry taking part in the funeral procession, but ultimately decided to walk besides them, telling his grandsons "I'll walk if you walk."William later described the experience as "one of the hardest things I've ever done", and Harry mentioned no child "should be asked to do" what they did. Nevertheless, William saw the act as a necessity to maintain "balance between duty and family" and Harry said that he was "very glad" that he took part in the procession.

In other words everyone knew it was brutally wrong but they did it anyway because of the tampon thing.

Does Charles not bleed? does he not weep at the moonlight? Does his heart not soar when listening to Coldplay? He is one of Us,

What if Charles was one of us

Just a stranger on the bus

nice piece by owen hatherley in jacobin abt how C3's poor understanding of architecture is party shaped by his never once being on a bus (or alone walking round a building or a city unchaperoned)

https://cdn.images.express.co.uk/img/dynamic/79/1200x712/secondary/Jeremy-clarkson-5378326.jpg

https://i2-prod.examinerlive.co.uk/incoming/article16429556.ece/ALTERNATES/s615/0_Alan-Brazil-2.jpg

Thought the Clarkson was a joke post but no, he was the actual winner.

Was it a poll of Daily Mail readers or something?

wondering if these results should more properly described as a symptom or a cause of the UK's current state

I wouldn’t have pegged him as a third but I understand some feel differently

wills has been well and truly shafted here

Mock the UK all you want but William has a lot of reach around here

NV getting lucky again.

> Was it a poll of Daily Mail readers or something?

it has 'express.co.uk' in the image url

I wouldn’t have pegged him as a third but I understand some feel differently

oh, way to miss the joke huh

https://media2.giphy.com/media/cPCYjo3Jc1S8v2orAo/giphy.gif?cid=9b38fe919r0wa6eo8tu1ghca2mqnu1ibwsna4hz8ab1qt4wz&ep=v1_gifs_username&rid=giphy.gif

I saw one on Instagram where it was turned into the Loveless cover

https://ichef.bbci.co.uk/news/1024/cpsprodpb/e92b/live/6c36b290-280b-11ef-a30e-c119d5668901.jpg

that could have been something funny but extremists and humour... :(