xkcd vs. MATT

GAME STATION 20,000

― TOMBOT, Tuesday, October 7, 2008 12:32 PM (10 minutes ago) Bookmark

Bbbbbut he might get sued if he had used a real brand

Just that they are not funny and they have more attempts at jokes than usual by virtue of their size.

But while I'm on the subject, his jokes (which are really just banal observations) are designed massage the egos of the weenies I encounter every day. They imagine they are part of the 2% of the population who get them, and the very fact that only 2% of the population get them is what makes them funny. It's totally circular bullshit, which they should be able to spot since every fucking one of them has read Gödel, Escher and Bach.

Although the fact that I encounter weenies every days says more about me as it does about them.

your memoirs should be called "weenies every days"

subtitle
"by virtue of their size"

http://www.timesonline.co.uk/tol/news/uk/scotland/article4916946.ece

O Natalie, O TBA, O Tusja: I had long assumed the terrorsits balaclava that you sport on the cover of Annule -
which was, for too long, the only image of you I possesed -
was there to conceal some ugliness or deformity
or perhaps merely spoke (and here, I hoped against hope) of a
young woman struggling
with a crippling shyness. How richly this latter theory has been confirmed by my Googling!

O who is this dark angel with her unruly Slavic eyebrows
ranged like two duelling pistols, lightly sweating in the pale light
of the TTF screen?
O behold her shaded, infolded concentration, her
heartbreakingly beautiful face so clearly betraying the tru focus
of one not merely content - as, no doubt, were others at the
Manover Elektronische Festival in Wien -
to hit play while making some fraudulent correction to a
volume slider
but instead deep in the manipulation of somecomplex
real-time software such as Ableton Live, MAX/MSP
or Supercollider.

O Natalie, how can I pay tribute to your infinitely versatile
blend of Nancarrow, Mille Plateaux, Venetian Snares, Xenakis,
Boards of Canada and Nobukazu Takemura
to say nothing of those radiant pads - so strongly reminiscent
of the mid-century bitonal pastoral of Charles Koechlin in their
harmonic bravura -
or your fine vocals, which, while admittedly limited in range
and force, are nonetheless so much more affecting than the
affected Arctic whisperings of those interchangably dreary
Stinas and Hannes and Bjorks, being in fact far closer in spirit
to a kind of glitch-hop Blossom Dearie?

I have also deduced from your staggeringly ingenious
employment of some pretty basic wavetables
that unlike many of your East European counterparts, all your
VST plug-ins, while not perhaps the best available,
probably all have a legitimate upgrade path - indeed I imagine
your entire DAW as pure as the driven snow, and not in any way
buggy or virusy
which makes me love you more, demonstrating as it does an
excess of virtue given your country's well-known talent for
software piracy.

Though I should confess that at times I find your habit of
maxxing
the frequency range with those bat-scaring ring-modulated
sine- bursts and the more distressing psychoacoustic properties
of phase-inversion in the sub-bass frequencies somewhat taxing
you are nonetheless as beautiful as the mighty Boards
themselves in your shamless organicizing of the code,
as if you had mined those saw and squares and ramps straight
from the Georgian motherlode.

O Natalie - I forgive you everything, even your catastrophic
adaptation of those lines from 'Dylan's' already shite
Do Not Go Gentle Into That Good Night
in the otherwise magnificent 'Sleepwalkers', and when you
open up those low-
pass filters in what sounds like a Minimoog emulation they
seem to open in my heart also...

At least, my dear, let me wish you the specific best:
may you be blessed
with the wonderful instrument you deserve, with a 2 Ghz
dual-core Intel chip and enough double-pumped DDR2 RAM
for the most CPU-intensive processes;
then no longer will all those goreous acoustic spaces

be accessible only via an offline procedure involving a freeware
convolution reverb and an imperfectly recorded impulse
response of the Concertgebouw made illegally with a hastily-
erected stereo pair and an exploded crisp bag

for I would have all your plug-ins run in real-time, in the
blameless zero-latency heaven of the 32-bit floating-point
enviroment, with no buffer-glitch or freeze or dropout or lag;
I would also grant you a MIDI controller of such responsiveness,
such smoothness of automation, travel and increment
that you would think it a transparent intercessor, a mere
copula, and feel machine and animal suddenly blent...

Forward Prize for Poetry judges don't read much then?

Presumably not. They have one opportunity to get quoted in the press each year, and this is the prose they come up with:

“No poet can possibly have done more to elevate our awareness of a pop star or the benefits of Google as Don Paterson does in Love Poem for Natalie “Tusja” Beridze. This is an impassioned love poem for a distant and not yet very famous, although becoming more so by the minute, idol,” Ms Hughes said.

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/telegraph/multimedia/archive/01007/matt111008_1007627a.jpg

yeah, cuz people dress like tramps on dress down friday?!?!

A lot of the stuff in these comics I feel I could ignore or whatever if someone I knew just said them in kind of a glib or offhand manner (or, say, were running their mouth on a message board), but this shit is someone's message.

(ok, some of it is straight up punchable, regardless)

imo this one kind of otm
http://kotaku.com/assets/resources/2008/02/xkcdwrongoninternet.jpg

is that the newest one on DRM?

even the scratchy way xkcd guy draws and his handwriting creep me out.

http://www.newyorker.com/online/blogs/cartoonlounge/2008/10/cartoonoff-xkcd.html

katz's "favorite animal eating your favorite food" deserves more recognition.

hey, this unfunny shitstain got some love from the new yorker, that's fantastic

And Matt got some luv from the London Review of Books recently.

ron paul reference ftw

http://mtblog.newyorker.com/online/blogs/cartoonlounge/stringXKCD.jpg

Just stop it.

These are no better than those fungi/fun-guy puns your middle school biology teacher told, but ya kinda chuckled at those cuz the attitude is like "lolz i said a stupid" where as this shit is...am I wrong in thinking they're sorta smug and elite or something? I mean they're meant to be cute, but there's something else.

http://www.qwantz.com/comics/comic2-1355.png

Randall Munroe-written episode of Dinosaur Comics. Seriously, fuck this guy.

I don't understand that comic...?

He managed to fuck up the format.

how dare he mess with dinosaur comics

if you can't think of an actual joke or amusing scenario, then just do some lazy meta shit instead.

signed, "internet person"

exactly

While he has had to tread carefully at times, he has never felt that his hands have been tied by political correctness. “I’ve done quite a number of cartoons about women in burkas,” he says, with a soft chuckle. “My favourite one involved a ventriloquist in a burka whose dummy was also wearing a burka. But we didn’t get a single complaint. I don’t think Abu Hamza reads The Daily Telegraph.”

http://imgs.xkcd.com/comics/secretary_part_4.png

this may be worse

Yeah, that was some pretty horrendous shit right there.

"evolves"

what does it mean

waht

Randall has another shot at Dinosaur Comics:

http://img89.imageshack.us/img89/4391/xkcdol6.png

I know! Wacky.

whoops, should be

http://img89.imageshack.us/img89/4391/xkcdol6.png

http://web.archive.org/web/20070624123359/lunacee.livejournal.com/133536.html

You're a little too obsessed with luna, Ethan. Its pretty creepy.

Its Chaki-level ew, actually.

Studs Terkel of Fictitious Skanks

http://i37.tinypic.com/o6cvo6.gif

^ pretty lame but i give a free pass to any cartoon about puppies

N****** M***** thinks the worst part about weekends is two days straight without xkcd updates.
5 hours ago

You're a little too obsessed with luna, Ethan. Its pretty creepy.

― Trayce, Tuesday, November 11, 2008 11:17 PM (1 week ago) Bookmark Suggest Ban Permalink

Its Chaki-level ew, actually.

― Trayce, Tuesday, November 11, 2008 11:17 PM (1 week ago) Bookmark Suggest Ban Permalink

nice try but... no.

http://imgs.xkcd.com/comics/firefox_wicca.png
i know it would be more interesting to try and find xkcd comics that actually ARE funny but this is still.... huh

http://imgs.xkcd.com/comics/advanced_technology.png

like, outta sight man

is he about to vomit?

He's considering whether to retool the factory to produce theorems or colorful plastic balls.