Jesus Fucking Christ: evangelical bigwig opposed gay marriage "because it takes the dirt and danger out of clandestine sex with rent-a-men"

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Richard Cizik, vice president for government affairs for the evangelicals association, expressed shock.

"Is this something I can imagine of Ted Haggard? No," he said.

i love how theres always some dude who says this - yeah i dont spend alot of time imagining a wrinkly old dude getting teabagged in some econolodge neither!!!

― and what (ooo), Friday, 3 November 2006 19:33 (nineteen years ago)

id love for them to ask somebody from his church or whatever and hes like 'yeah i gotta say, ive imagined ted haggard fucked up on crank getting his balls sucked by a grandpa plenty of times'

― and what (ooo), Friday, 3 November 2006 19:34 (nineteen years ago)

MIKE JONES ON MSNBC RIGHT NOW!!!!

― researching ur life (grady), Friday, 3 November 2006 19:35 (nineteen years ago)

That'll be in the bonus features on the Jesus Camp DVD, I'll bet.

― Alex in SF (Alex in SF), Friday, 3 November 2006 19:35 (nineteen years ago)

(xpost)

― Alex in SF (Alex in SF), Friday, 3 November 2006 19:35 (nineteen years ago)

PRETTY HOT FOR 59 TOO!!!

XPOST

― researching ur life (grady), Friday, 3 November 2006 19:36 (nineteen years ago)

ROFLZ

― Shakey Mo Collier (Shakey Mo Collier), Friday, 3 November 2006 19:36 (nineteen years ago)

Haha wait he bought meth from the gay escort, but apparently "HE NEVER USED IT."

― Alex in SF (Alex in SF), Friday, 3 November 2006 19:37 (nineteen years ago)

"I was just buying it for uh a friend Dick Cizik."

― Alex in SF (Alex in SF), Friday, 3 November 2006 19:38 (nineteen years ago)

"AND AS FAR AS 'JUST A MASSAGE'... WELL, IF THAT'S WHAT HE WANTS TO CALL IT, THAT'S UP TO HIM"

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

― researching ur life (grady), Friday, 3 November 2006 19:39 (nineteen years ago)

DIDNT REALIZE WHO HAGGARD WAS UNTIL HE SAW HIM ON DISCOVERY CHANNELS SPECIAL ABOUT THE ANTICHRIST!!!!

― researching ur life (grady), Friday, 3 November 2006 19:41 (nineteen years ago)

pwn3d

― and what (ooo), Friday, 3 November 2006 19:41 (nineteen years ago)

am I alone in kinda sorta hoping that there actually IS a gay cabal out to undermine the religious right...? that after years of being scapegoated and being used as a wedge issue maybe some angry fags got together and said "allright, this election cycle = PAYBACK TIME".

― Shakey Mo Collier (Shakey Mo Collier), Friday, 3 November 2006 19:42 (nineteen years ago)

"TYPICALLY $200, THERE WERE TIMES HE WOULD GIVE ME A LITTLE EXTRA!"

― researching ur life (grady), Friday, 3 November 2006 19:43 (nineteen years ago)

just as long as you dont hope their next mission is raping the shit out of rachel ray

― and what (ooo), Friday, 3 November 2006 19:43 (nineteen years ago)

how would that advance anyone's political cause?

― Sam rides the beat like a bicycle (Molly Jones), Friday, 3 November 2006 19:44 (nineteen years ago)

Haha

― Alex in SF (Alex in SF), Friday, 3 November 2006 19:44 (nineteen years ago)

Mike Jones is Grade-A man meat for a 59 year old hooker.

― researching ur life (grady), Friday, 3 November 2006 19:47 (nineteen years ago)

Haha isn't he 49?

― Alex in SF (Alex in SF), Friday, 3 November 2006 19:49 (nineteen years ago)

omg I so ashamed of running joke abt rachel ray between me n the wife

― Shakey Mo Collier (Shakey Mo Collier), Friday, 3 November 2006 19:50 (nineteen years ago)

49. sorry. Def. hot for 49 though, too.

― researching ur life (grady), Friday, 3 November 2006 19:52 (nineteen years ago)

http://slacktivist.typepad.com/photos/uncategorized/mike.jpg

media/blog coverage:

-from Time Magazine

-Reaction from the guy who wrote that Harper's piece

-my usual go-to-guy for stuff like this, who mentions that Haggard was one of the guys who supported the fundies running amuck at the U.S. Air Force Academy(also located in Colorado Springs, where I almost attended)

-Dan Savage and here

― kingfish prætor (kingfish 2.0), Friday, 3 November 2006 19:55 (nineteen years ago)

omg I so ashamed of running joke abt rachel ray between me n the wife

???

― kingfish prætor (kingfish 2.0), Friday, 3 November 2006 19:58 (nineteen years ago)

hahaha

http://static.crooksandliars.com/2006/11/haggerd-bush.jpg

― kingfish prætor (kingfish 2.0), Friday, 3 November 2006 20:00 (nineteen years ago)

awesome!

― Shakey Mo Collier (Shakey Mo Collier), Friday, 3 November 2006 20:02 (nineteen years ago)

(ethan's ref'ing a post of mine on the thread about TV chefs for no apparent reason)

― Shakey Mo Collier (Shakey Mo Collier), Friday, 3 November 2006 20:04 (nineteen years ago)

The portrait of George Washington there has no comment.

― kingfish prætor (kingfish 2.0), Friday, 3 November 2006 20:04 (nineteen years ago)

glad something came along to boot Kerry offa the headlines

― Shakey Mo Collier (Shakey Mo Collier), Friday, 3 November 2006 20:07 (nineteen years ago)

unfortunately, no TDS/TCR tonight, which their writers must be kicking themselves over, since this story will probably be overtaken by whatever happens next by sunday/monday.

― kingfish prætor (kingfish 2.0), Friday, 3 November 2006 20:12 (nineteen years ago)

remember katrina-gate happening when they were on vacation for a week?

― researching ur life (grady), Friday, 3 November 2006 20:31 (nineteen years ago)

unfortunately, for certain select die-hard evangelicals, i think this is only going to cement the belief that no one, NO ONE!! is safe from the temptations of TEH GAY MENACE.
-- elmo argonaut (elmo.oxyge...), November 3rd, 2006 8:57 AM.

I'm starting to believe that people who say "homosexuality is a choice" and believe that exposure to the very concept opens the door to "conversion" are... well... telling the truth as they know it.

― hearditonthexico (rogermexico), Friday, 3 November 2006 20:42 (nineteen years ago)

Is it as good and even-handed as everyone is making it out to be?

I'm waiting for the DVD also. In other news, the Jesus Camp camp won't be in ND anytime soon.

― Elvis Telecom (Chris Barrus), Friday, 3 November 2006 20:45 (nineteen years ago)

How much meth can you get for $100-$200?

― Mike Dixn (Mike Dixon), Friday, 3 November 2006 20:59 (nineteen years ago)

He'z on MSNBC again right now.

― researching ur life (grady), Friday, 3 November 2006 21:03 (nineteen years ago)

telling the truth as they know it.

yeah, similarly, i think that these folks' fucked-up view of gay people comes from the few massively closeted & dysfunctional gay folks in their own midst. In other words, when you repress that much, that deeply, for that long, shit's gunna manifest itself in even more fucked up ways.

― kingfish prætor (kingfish 2.0), Friday, 3 November 2006 21:11 (nineteen years ago)

"How much meth can you get for $100-$200?"

An 1/8th probably.

― Alex in SF (Alex in SF), Friday, 3 November 2006 21:15 (nineteen years ago)

Which would last this guy, like, how long?

― kingfish prætor (kingfish 2.0), Friday, 3 November 2006 21:18 (nineteen years ago)

http://profile.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=user.viewprofile&friendid=65374563

― and what (ooo), Friday, 3 November 2006 21:19 (nineteen years ago)

excellent find.

Movies Napoleon Dynamite

oh and like this is a big fucking surprise

― kingfish prætor (kingfish 2.0), Friday, 3 November 2006 21:21 (nineteen years ago)

"Which would last this guy, like, how long?"

Depends. Probably last a serious user a week if they only used it themselves. If he was sharing it with a bunch of folks, maybe as little time as a long weekend.

― Alex in SF (Alex in SF), Friday, 3 November 2006 21:23 (nineteen years ago)

very dissapointed Pastor Ted's myspace has disabled comments.

― researching ur life (grady), Friday, 3 November 2006 21:32 (nineteen years ago)

Who I'd like to meet:

Jesus... after I die.

― researching ur life (grady), Friday, 3 November 2006 21:32 (nineteen years ago)

Ross Parsley

― geoff (gcannon), Friday, 3 November 2006 21:35 (nineteen years ago)

Ross's comments are NOT disabled...and he has music! His own!

http://profile.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=user.viewprofile&friendid=57573578

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Friday, 3 November 2006 21:36 (nineteen years ago)

scary amount of dudes have him as a friend & unironically list him as one of their heroes

― and what (ooo), Friday, 3 November 2006 21:38 (nineteen years ago)

Of that I have no doubt, sadly.

Talking to reporters outside his house Friday, Haggard denied the sex allegations but said that he did buy meth from the man because he was curious.

Wasn't that a King of the Hill episode?

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Friday, 3 November 2006 21:39 (nineteen years ago)

I mean, I guess it should be obvious, but the only way to categorize hot, hot sex between two or more anonymous, muscular studs in a sleazy bathhouse as a "temptation" is if you find it... well... tempting.

Especially when the weak-willed perverts who shamelessly embrace their degenerate lifestyle are allowed to rub it in your face like that. With their Halloween parades. Because that's the day of witchcraft.

― hearditonthexico (rogermexico), Friday, 3 November 2006 21:40 (nineteen years ago)

I'm particulary charmed that he admits to receiving a massage from the studly rent-boy, "but no sex!"

― hearditonthexico (rogermexico), Friday, 3 November 2006 21:44 (nineteen years ago)

Haha well he admits to buying speed, "but not using it" so at least he's consistent.

― Alex in SF (Alex in SF), Friday, 3 November 2006 21:50 (nineteen years ago)

'Didn't inhale' takes on an entirely new meaning.

― M. White (Miguelito), Friday, 3 November 2006 21:50 (nineteen years ago)

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