Fuck Off Back To The Little Leagues: EPL 21/22

Aren’t Barcelona close to bankruptcy? Fascinating that they still can try and spend £35m on a player, after already buying Torres for £50m

Wish I was so rich that I just didn’t give a shit about being a billion in debt with no way to pay it off.

the thing about the debt is that so long as Barca can keep making their interest payments they can just refinance in a year or two, or whenever it is their loans fall due. they can just take out a new loan for the same amount, on terms that are more favourable wrt interest and fees (or less favourable, depending on what their commercial outlook is at that point), pay off the old loan with the new and continue stumbling along as before.

in on sense this is really just kicking that can down the road but also that's how p much all businesses of that size and with that level of turnover operate. the only number that really matters from a financial perspective for a company that turns over whatever ridiculous sum it is that Barca generates each year is "can they afford to keep up the interest payments on the debt, no matter how large the overall figure?" and so long as the answer is yes, they'll keep getting lenders to dole out huge amounts of money which they can put towards transfers, because the lenders understand that in 3 years or 5 years or whenever their particular loan falls due, Barca will refinance again, again on more or less favourable terms, and then it's someone else's problem

all of this is presumably why Barca were one of the teams to tell CVC to go fuck themselves with their attempted buy in to La Liga, cause they've done the maths and worked out that whatever percentage of broadcasting rights, ad revenues, sponsorship and all of that which CVC would have been sucking out of the league is gonna be a long-term loss for Barcelona. so long as they can keep showing lenders that all of that money is gonna continue pouring into the club, they can keep mortgaging the future income against any loans they wanna take out for further investment

this is all obviously besides the purely football-related financial limits and sanctions imposed upon them by La Liga, which I gather have been eased by the shipping out of Aguero and Coutinho this winter.

but yeah essentially there will always be someone who is willing to lend large sums of money today to a massive global business with huge turnover so long as Barca are able to put up all of that guaranteed future income as collateral

as you're here, a hoy hoy - Calum Chambers: waste or not waste? in my head i have him pegged as "basically Phil Jones, but possibly a bit worse than that". a guy who i must've watched play at least 30 times and i still have no idea what his level is. i assuming that as a free signing all-purpose RB / CB / DM backup he will do. but i've got very little to base that on.

didn't mean this v boring question to be exclusive btw, other ilx Gooners please chip in

― Windsor Davies, Thursday, 27 January 2022 23:34 (yesterday) bookmarkflaglink

I think your description is pretty accurate. He reminds me of other previous United defenders, the John O’Shea, Wes Brown types, who were alright mid table players but shouldn’t be anywhere near a club who wants to take getting into Europe seriously. Actually I guess that really sums up Phil Jones too.

Maguire and all

USA semi-starter gk Matt Turner is apparently going to Arsenal, curious if he will actually play?

Arsenal tend to only play second choice goal keepers in the cups

Barca are apparently looking to sell half of their media studio to finance a deal for Haaland.

The Portuguese press is suggesting that Porto have agreed a deal with Liverpool for Diaz. I think that makes Amrabat the only player currently credibly linked to Spurs of the ‘five to six’ they were meant to be looking at bringing in.

Amrabat who will presumably still be in Cameroon when the window closes.

well, we looked

is this the first window where loans, frees and salaries have dominated over actual fees to this extent

There is a lot of very weird stuff going on.

News #Gosens: Crazy goal-clause revealed! It’s a 18-months-loan, not 6. But as soon as @Inter scores the first goal in a competitive match 2022/23, they have got an obligation to buy. #Inter will pay the €25m transfer fee (+add-ons) by the end of the contract 2026. @SkySportNews

— Florian Plettenberg (@Plettigoal) January 29, 2022

I'm not sure at what point dodgy accounting tricks start becoming ritual magic at this point

Kulusevski to Spurs on loan-to-buy seems fairly solid. Purchase becomes mandatory if Spurs qualify for the Champions’ League, so no firm long term commitment.

He’s a good player and the sort of creative midfielder they need, though not in great form at the moment.

Bid for Bentancur too, who’s also good and also in questionable form.

not that I can raise much enthusiasm but certainly anyone that can compete with what we have would be welcome even as a squad option because consistency is such a huge issue

Alli ndombele lo celso not even any use as a threat to eg winks because he knew the past year that trying even a little while still being rubbish was good enough

They would both arguably improve the first eleven from the off, which would be a pretty successful window, with the clearance of some dead wood. The only qualm with Kulusevski is Spurs’ habit of taking productive, goal scoring, attacking midfielders and doing whatever Lamela / Lo Celso / Bergwijn were / are doing with them.

So Mason Greenwood is an abuser whose career should hopefully be over very soon

i would be sad because i always liked the kid but given the story fuck him and yes, game over

This is like when I play Football Manager. https://t.co/HWOu3r9FIu

— Unlimited Capacity to Steve (@invisibleste) January 30, 2022

lol truth

fans put him off after his gooner troll childhood came up

So Mason Greenwood is an abuser whose career should hopefully be over very soon

Absolutely sickening. What a piece of shit.

repellant and depressing, fucking hell

ronaldo has apparently unfollowed him on social media, he can fuck off too

Arsenal rumoured to be looking at triggering the release clauses of Alexander Isaak, who is a very Arsenal-style player but not worth remotely near €75m, or Raul de Tomas, who is a big lump of a centre forward but could work out quite well imo.

i used to have de Tomas in one of my Football Manager teams, he performed as described

lot of question marks over Raul de tuomas imo

Dele has gone to Everton on loan.

Impressed with Burnley finding a 6’6” centre forward to replace their 6’3” one.

Not on loan! Dele signing is permanent.

free transfer with clause of guaranteed payment after 20 games

weghorst was p great last season but hasn't been at it this one, although wolfsburg lost their manager during the summer and are currently on their 2nd one this season who himself is on about a 10 game without a win streak so not the best of circumstances.

donny vdb and delli both being great would be funny.

I mean I'm in such a healthy place re Dele I literally do not care what he does anywhere else

lot of question marks over Raul de tuomas imo

― Ár an broc a mhic (darraghmac), Monday, 31 January 2022 14:50 (two hours ago) bookmarkflaglink

Sounds like a perfect Arsenal signing

sigh

Newcastle are supposedly trying to hijack the Dele deal.

Ben Brereton to Barca if the Aubameyang deal falls through would be delightful.

ramsey to rangers is a belter

can't believe they can afford his wages

max a quarter of them I'd imagine

reports he's on either £200k or £400k pw - that's a lot of ginger bottles

Well, they won a good few league titles before with not so much creative as magical accounting. When they go bust this time and have to relaunch themselves as Rangers Mk. III they'll probably have to start off in the Lowlands League.

maybe having gone bust and worked their way back up once they're confident that the existing structural factors means they could do the same thing again, and therefore worth taking a few risks to try and push on from here on the grounds that it hardly matters? in which case why not? they're too big to fail!

mildly disappointed with the decision to let Matt Targett go to Newcastle - it's not that he's particularly great or anything (he was player of the season for Villa last year but he benefited more than anyone from Grealish's peculiar brand of magic - he's always looked much less assured when not partnered with one of the best players in the world). He may be a bit of a defensive liability unless he's well-protected and can certainly be done for pace by any winger in the league

but still feels like we acquired some depth in Digne and have immediately given that away, to a team we should be praying to get relegated, no less; they'll be aiming for the same positions as us next season. idk presumably there was a financial imperative and Targett wanted it, still feels like a bad move.

Bruno Guimarães is the most intriguing move in this window - ppl who theoretically know their business won't shut up about what an incredible player this guy is. will be v interesting to see how he affects things. certainly if he is as good as advertised then between him, ASM, the new look Joelinton and their various capable cloggers it looks like they might have enough to avoid relegation. yuck.

on that first point re: Rangers - does admittedly seem strange to break the bank so spectacularly on that particular gamble but i'm flailing around for other explanations if those numbers are true

Bruno Guimarães is the most intriguing move in this window

will also be intriguing to watch Traore in La Liga. is he gonna torch the place or will his fundamental shortcomings continue hold him back? would've loved to see him in Serie A

juve are covering his wages - the rangers II have no money. not sure he'll play more than 10 games in the cinch

ah i see - i understood that the 200-400k was just the range of figures quoted from when he signed for Juve but I assumed Rangers would need to be picking up at least 30-40% (still pretty astronomical) for it to be worth Juve's while (and also thought Rangers might've had to outbid semi-interested EPL clubs - I know Villa were supposed to be taking a look a few weeks ago). just a case of getting an unwanted and unsettled player out of the dressing room, then

rangers II fobbing off Bacuna for pennies to Brum just before appearances fee kicks in says to me they aren't chucking the bunce about

Kris Boyd thinks Dele Alli will bring much needed legs to the Everton midfield oooof oh no lololol

aw i was gonna do a joke about some much-needed work ethic in an underperforming squad earlier today

Richarlison, Dele Alli, Donny Van De Beek, Anwar El Ghazi, Demarai Gray, Andros Townsend, Alex Iwobi is the most delightful rogues’ gallery from which to select the 3 in your 4231

if Dele is found with quick balls into feet or chest running and breaking lines he's absolutely the solution to some team's problems but does anyone routinely play direct risky passes anymore

I'm easily impressed and accustomed to watching defectives, but I've often thought both Alli and Townsend both looked good, even very good at times!