I would EXCELSIOR, but I haven't got a ZING to LOL

I don't think I've ever worn a turtleneck actually

no wait when I was a little kid mom made me wear one to church with this little blazer

and the dyson is your god now

Shark has proven for me to be an acceptable dyson knockoff brand

to my fellow Dyson owners in the VIP remember they hate us cuz they ain't us no cap 💰💰💰💰

what in the hell is going on in here

xp you suck

haha I don't know honestly

you're hosting a Christmas dinner. a guest thoughtfully brings some corn for popping, but forgets about it before taking a seat. the loose kernels spill out of his pants pocket onto the floor. and here, in front of your Christmas dinner guests, you still find a Shark to be an acceptable dyson knockoff brand? You've got the red turtleneck with embroidered mistletoe on the fold, but the vacuum is lacking sir.

no thats fair tbh but youre pitching an extremely specific circumstance that i feel doesnt justify the premium

i gotta say i think the shark would be perfectly able for any amount of popcorn kernels

youre gonna need a bigger gloat

just a small bowl of floor popcorn, Servant. thank you, how delicious

and boom! we're back to the lols!

the corn for popping on your floor isn't the point. a fucking black & decker could suck up that soft sawdust shit. this is a question of form not function. the dinner guests. the knockoff vacuum. you are fucked as soon as you get up to head for the closet door, and you know it. "leave it," you say. "just leave it. it's like a Christmas Texas Roadhouse, but where the peanut shells are loose kernels, innit?" but the guests aren't buying it. you'd better produce a Dyson before the "Rattlesnake Bites" tray is passed or the night's ruined.

The problem with Shark vacuums is that they need to keep moving or else they die

I've been laughing a lot today at this thread tbh.

we were treating the thread like a FOLDER of actually funny posts. now we are having a CONVERSATION about vacuum cleaners.

I keep my shark tm vacuum cleaner out in the middle of the room the better to demonstrate how i eschew the 2018 brandchasing desperation of the d*son shills

I've got 99 vacuums but a Bissell ain't one

"Having an idea for doing something better and making it happen - even though it appears impossible. That's still my dream." James Dyson. Engineer.

sharks seem to get good notices
for years I had my grandma's old oreck what a tank. I agree that bags are actually cleaner but my problem was I would forget to buy bags and then not vacuum because I had no bags

you needed a modern miracle of another kind -- a vacuum bag subscription

HOW COME EVERYONE ISN'T GOING BONKERS OVER LOUIS JAGGER PLAYING BOHEMIAN RHAPSODY WITH A DYSON VACCUMM???

my mom had one of these
https://pictureserver.auctionninja.com/pictureserver/sistersincharge/auction-images/37/63837260_IMG1312.JPG

Removing bookmark

Removing bookmark

xxp: Electrolux: Mom-tested, jamband-approved

https://miro.medium.com/max/1400/1*DabSucj9QoqiQ4YgMq2WKw.png

are 15 hour training days normal?

― koogs, Saturday, January 8, 2022 2:04 AM (two hours ago) bookmarkflaglink

definitely not!

― they were written with a ouija board and a rhyming dictionary (Neanderthal), Saturday, January 8, 2022 2:08 AM (two hours ago) bookmarkflaglink

the one with Denzel was 2 hours

― sarahell, Saturday, January 8, 2022 3:17 AM (one hour ago) bookmarkflaglink

Heh

LOL

From US politics:

"Hard R district" is kind of a double entendre these days

― frogbs

har dee hard r

― reggae mike love (polyphonic)

'har dee r' would have been better

'har d r' if we're being even pickier, which we should be

guys, it's a miss

https://i.gifer.com/origin/02/02fc4313db56a52ca220b2337fcbf303.gif

better for punning "hardy har har"?

guys, it's a miss

everyone's a critic

It’s not the consumer’s fault that artists don’t get paid well. It’s not the consumer’s fault that Spotify charges so little. It’s not the consumer’s fault that major labels didn’t negotiate better terms with streamers, nor that they don’t offer better terms to their artists.
― sctttnnnt (pgwp)

Is that honestly the way you see yourself as a consumer? Helpless?
― nobody like my rap (One Eye Open)

I don't associate "Helpless" with Spotify anymore.
― deep luminous trombone (Eazy)

It does not strictly work, therefore I cannot lol

it's a neil young hit, you must acquit

the quibble and the damage done

"Helpless" would've been a tricky one even back in the Napster days.

[Re: Tom Brady]

i want him go go away, but i also might want him to stay and shit on adam schefter constantly

― mookieproof, Saturday, January 29, 2022 10:03 PM bookmarkflaglink

sounds like you're looking for an only fans

― i cannot help if you made yourself not funny (forksclovetofu), Saturday, January 29, 2022 10:40 PM bookmarkflaglink

hahahaha

feed me with your chips (zchyrs)
Posted: 16 February 2022 at 21:58:59

"I felt a great disturbance in The Vibe, as if millions of tastemakers suddenly cried out in boredom, and were suddenly silenced"

Has Latvia left NATO and no-one told me?

― Blu Ray Davies (Tom D.), Thursday, 24 February 2022 21:51 (four minutes ago) bookmarkflaglink

knocked out in the qualifiers

― Ár an broc a mhic (darraghmac), Thursday, 24 February 2022 21:54 (one minute ago) bookmarkflaglink

VAR is hell.

― Blu Ray Davies (Tom D.), Thursday, 24 February 2022 21:54 (one minute ago) bookmarkflaglink

As of March 1, GMG Union is officially on strike. We're asking people not to click on—or contribute content to—@Gizmodo, @Jalopnik, @Jezebel, @Kotaku, @Lifehacker, and @TheRoot.

Learn more about our fight for a fair contract with @GOMediaInc: https://t.co/xX0476MfI4
— GMG Union (@gmgunion) March 1, 2022

― jbn, Tuesday, March 1, 2022 11:40 AM bookmarkflaglink

No prob.

― peace, man, Tuesday, March 1, 2022 11:48 AM bookmarkflaglink

time for a new thread ?

― conrad, Thursday, 3 March 2022 12:55 (yesterday) bookmarkflaglink

"time for new threads" - MPs collecting their forced payrise

― nashwan, Thursday, 3 March 2022 13:19 (yesterday) bookmarkflaglink

Time for new Threads (TV Movie, 1984).

― Scampo di tutti i Scampi (ShariVari), Thursday, 3 March 2022 13:31 (yesterday) bookmarkflaglink

*Reading about nuclear war in my newspaper 12 hours after it started over my morning coffee and bowl of Cornflakes*

Sounds bad..

― xyzzzz__, Friday, March 4, 2022 3:04 PM (two hours ago) bookmarkflaglink

Snap, crackle and pop indeed.

― Resident Papist (Tom D.), Friday, March 4, 2022 3:07 PM (two hours ago) bookmarkflaglink

they're after me nuclear arms

― rob, Friday, March 4, 2022 3:09 PM (two hours ago) bookmarkflaglink

muesli assured destruction

― wins, Friday, March 4, 2022 3:12 PM (two hours ago) bookmarkflaglink

sure but it's tricky to treat sitcom characters this way

― frogbs, Tuesday, 8 March 2022 18:28 (yesterday) bookmarkflaglink

no it isnt, its fake and we can literaly make shit up

― class project pat (m bison), Tuesday, 8 March 2022 18:59 (yesterday) bookmarkflaglink