the crimes of george lucas ('90s on)

I keep drilling my 8 year old son over and over again that Empireis the best, but Ep III is his favorite.
"Anakin's annoying."
"So what, he's cool. And I like droidekas."

droidekas?

This is probably more of a good thing than a crime, but that the key battle scene between Anakin and Obi Wan Kenobi appears to be entirely modelled on the Black Knight scene from Monty Python and the Holy Grail:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dhRUe-gz690

like doesn't it completely undercut the big darth is luke's father reveal??

what a disaster this will be for whatever young mutant would actually watch them all for the first time in numerical order

you'd like to think by halfway through Clones they'd just put on some brokencyde and play a video game

ya im just sayin!!

i guess what really pissed me off is that when i watched the original trilogy i there were passing mentions of a young anakin/vader, i always imagined this amazing charismatic, grim, kinda sociopathic dude who would be played by some epic actor, but then they toss it to some asshole who comes off like a fratboy killer from some episode of csi: miami.

"and there"

that's almost too complimentary to hayden christiansen

what bugs me even more is that young badass obi wan turned out to be such a drip... he really should have been the han of hte series...

yeah i mean alec guinness was kind of weirdly imposing, right? and ewan mcgregor came off as kind of...short?

oh god yeah crime no. 35235: Obi-Dan Fogelberg

The alterations made to the Jabba's palace scene...ughhh

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9pQzJlL1wqs

they always implied that obi-wan was a real loose cannon and his recklessness is sorta what "made" darth vader

Darth Maul sure was thrilling, though, no? With his Mudvayne make up and everything?

insertion of Hayden Christensen ghost at the end of Jedi was particularly grating and is a handy symbol for the new films poisoning the old ones.

oh remember when obi wan and liam neeson double-teamed him? that was so cheap!! they also double-teamed count dooku, an elderly man

it's such a basic rule, the GOOD GUYS are supposed to be outnumbered

Its been hinted at, but it needs to be said - CGI Jabba.

Motherfucker had GRAVITAS when you just assumed that he was moved by people, based on his influence. Now, thanks to Colonel Neck Retention Chinstrap's merciless fucking about, Jabba is a slug, skirting around freighter bays on Mos Eisley.

half the OG characters were these free-wheeling assholes too, and everyone in the new trilogy was really inert and studied.

insertion of Hayden Christensen ghost at the end of Jedi was particularly grating and is a handy symbol for the new films poisoning the old ones.

[/i]

god when i saw those remastered/restored star wars movies... digital jabba made me really sad xp

Motherfucker had GRAVITAS when you just assumed that he was moved by people, based on his influence. Now, thanks to Colonel Neck Retention Chinstrap's merciless fucking about, Jabba is a slug, skirting around freighter bays on Mos Eisley.

― I got it. I'm gone. (B.L.A.M.), Wednesday, July 15, 2009 2:16 PM (36 seconds ago) Bookmark Suggest Ban Permalink

totally totally

i gotta say i thought macgregor was a great obi wan but its not hard to look good in those movies

seriously, the whole awesome thing about jabba in return of the jedi was he didn't move

they also double-teamed count dooku, an elderly man

Bad image. Very bad image.

i thought macgregor got the voice down 100% and he was ok in some ways, but his physical presence was nil imo

i gotta say i thought macgregor was a great obi wan but its not hard to look good in those movies

― rip dom passantino 3/5/09 never forget (max), Wednesday, July 15, 2009 2:17 PM (40 seconds ago) Bookmark Suggest Ban Permalink

he had the voice down and he seemed game but he had nothing to do but frown and scold

xp haha

possibly because they made him wear a rattail

You want gravitas? Jimmy Smits had gravitas.

i guess macgregors obi-wan should have been the WORST thing in a potentially amazing star wars prequels and instead it turned out to be the best

The idea that nearly every jedi in the universe can be killed by a bunch of regular dudes in one fell swoop, and without each death being an incredible epic battle, drove me insane.

you know, in theory I appreciate trying to make Anakin's move to the dark side feel like the result of a personal/emotional tragic flaw as opposed to an intellectual decision, but holy geez did they take this way too far, even despite all the crappy exposition, basically making his change into Vader feel like the result of just being a jackass teen-rebel wannabe who fell in with the wrong crowd

a list of what people praised from lucas '90s on is just about as embarrassing as his crimes.

YODA FIGHT WOW!!!!

i mean there's the banality of evil and then there's just the banality of these movies

to be fair to ewan tho what would you do if you were cast as OBI WAN FUCKING KENOBI and you show up to the set the first day and find out you have to do a scene opposite the kid from jingle all the way and stepin fechit inside a blue room?

Did you know that Anakin cannot possibly attack Obi-Wan effectively when Obi-Wan has the higher ground? The things you learn.

the campy bad guys were the only good part of the prequels: dooku and emperor were over the top

big crime for me: making rational adults see the prequels multiple times until they "kinda liked it" by holding a lightsaber to their inner child's neck

How come every fucking scene in these movies involves someone standing in front of a window with a million fucking things happening in the background.

a list of what people praised from lucas '90s on is just about as embarrassing as his crimes.

YODA FIGHT WOW!!!!

― da croupier, Wednesday, July 15, 2009 2:21 PM (26 seconds ago) Bookmark Suggest Ban Permalink

haha i remember how desperate i was at that point to find ANYTHING redeeming about the movies that people would ask me how it was and i would be like, YODA FIGHTS!!! and theyd be like yeah but is it good and id say YODA FIGHTS A DUDE and theyd say youre not answering my question and then i would go cry somewhere

YODA FIGHTS DOOKU yeah for about 15 seconds...

one thing i liked about the originals was the fact that around the margins there were all of these minor roles filled by these really solid character actors that helped fill in the universe a little more without overly explaining it, whereas the new films had none of that, just the occasional smits/sam jackson/terence stamp star cameo bullshit.

like the entirety of the empire's fleet was commanded by bbc regulars, i loved that

i mean i've been over this abt 6934873208 times with my friends but ppl can be forgiven imo for having blinders on through episode 1 and even episode 2.

god when i saw those remastered/restored star wars movies... digital jabba made me really sad xp

OMG esp. when Han stepped on his tail & Jabba's comic exclamation. That really should have tipped all of us off that this man was no longer to be trusted with his own mythos.

yeah it's weird to think that someday (if not already) there will be folks who will naturally gravitate towards watching the six films in numerical order

― "he said...all things passantino the night" (omar little), Wednesday, July 15, 2009 6:06 PM (16 minutes ago) Bookmark Suggest Ban Permalink

like doesn't it completely undercut the big darth is luke's father reveal??

― Cowardly G. Soundgarden (s1ocki), Wednesday, July 15, 2009 6:07 PM (16 minutes ago) Bookmark

Read some thing on the net arguing the best order to watch them in for the first time would be I, IV, II, V, III, VI, which kind of makes sense if you think about it.

Or that Admiral Piet was managing Slade at the same time?

T/S: Peter Cushing vs. fake Japanese lizard spice federation trader