the crimes of george lucas ('90s on)

maybe he was just psyched to be getting away from his freak dad

han solo stepping on tiny jabba's tail in episode iv

i have GONE OFF about this before, but what really drives me nuts is that the basic scenario laid out in the prequels is really interesting! but they are still horrible. it's like someone made three really horrible movies out a great novel about a despot's rise to power. except there's no such novel. it's the weirdest thing.

^

to be fair, swinging close-up IMAX testicles would be marginally funny for 30 seconds or so, and will probably feature in a Baron-Cohen movie at some point

making people call star wars "episode IV: A New Hope"

^^^^^^^^^^

that, too me is the greatest crime

omg totally

like seriously, from teh coolest movie title ever (at least when you're a kid), STAR. WARS. to... "a new hope."

or making Raiders into Indiana Jones and the Raiders of the Lost Ark

A New Hope that Lucas will stop fucking with Star Wars

it sounds like some corny-ass mandy moore flick about the summer after high school

her name is "hope" in the film

Anakin: I killed them. I killed them all. They're dead, every single one of them. And not just the men, but the women and the children, too. They're like animals, and I slaughtered them like animals. I HATE THEM!

haaaaa xp

this is kinda funny: http://www.starwarsuncut.com/

The CGI "celebration sequence across the galaxy" in Return of the Jedi, the updated version. Like the Ewok song was bad enough George.

"death sticks"

can't imagine what a kid who's already seen I-III would think of "A New Hope." But then any kid that actually sat through I-III without the memory of the original trilogy is already unfathomable to me.

ya i mean, if you watch them "in order" does it make any kind of sense?

yeah it's weird to think that someday (if not already) there will be folks who will naturally gravitate towards watching the six films in numerical order

like doesn't it completely undercut the big darth is luke's father reveal??

I keep drilling my 8 year old son over and over again that Empireis the best, but Ep III is his favorite.
"Anakin's annoying."
"So what, he's cool. And I like droidekas."

droidekas?

This is probably more of a good thing than a crime, but that the key battle scene between Anakin and Obi Wan Kenobi appears to be entirely modelled on the Black Knight scene from Monty Python and the Holy Grail:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dhRUe-gz690

like doesn't it completely undercut the big darth is luke's father reveal??

what a disaster this will be for whatever young mutant would actually watch them all for the first time in numerical order

you'd like to think by halfway through Clones they'd just put on some brokencyde and play a video game

ya im just sayin!!

i guess what really pissed me off is that when i watched the original trilogy i there were passing mentions of a young anakin/vader, i always imagined this amazing charismatic, grim, kinda sociopathic dude who would be played by some epic actor, but then they toss it to some asshole who comes off like a fratboy killer from some episode of csi: miami.

"and there"

that's almost too complimentary to hayden christiansen

what bugs me even more is that young badass obi wan turned out to be such a drip... he really should have been the han of hte series...

yeah i mean alec guinness was kind of weirdly imposing, right? and ewan mcgregor came off as kind of...short?

oh god yeah crime no. 35235: Obi-Dan Fogelberg

The alterations made to the Jabba's palace scene...ughhh

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9pQzJlL1wqs

they always implied that obi-wan was a real loose cannon and his recklessness is sorta what "made" darth vader

Darth Maul sure was thrilling, though, no? With his Mudvayne make up and everything?

insertion of Hayden Christensen ghost at the end of Jedi was particularly grating and is a handy symbol for the new films poisoning the old ones.

oh remember when obi wan and liam neeson double-teamed him? that was so cheap!! they also double-teamed count dooku, an elderly man

it's such a basic rule, the GOOD GUYS are supposed to be outnumbered

Its been hinted at, but it needs to be said - CGI Jabba.

Motherfucker had GRAVITAS when you just assumed that he was moved by people, based on his influence. Now, thanks to Colonel Neck Retention Chinstrap's merciless fucking about, Jabba is a slug, skirting around freighter bays on Mos Eisley.

half the OG characters were these free-wheeling assholes too, and everyone in the new trilogy was really inert and studied.

insertion of Hayden Christensen ghost at the end of Jedi was particularly grating and is a handy symbol for the new films poisoning the old ones.

[/i]

god when i saw those remastered/restored star wars movies... digital jabba made me really sad xp

Motherfucker had GRAVITAS when you just assumed that he was moved by people, based on his influence. Now, thanks to Colonel Neck Retention Chinstrap's merciless fucking about, Jabba is a slug, skirting around freighter bays on Mos Eisley.

― I got it. I'm gone. (B.L.A.M.), Wednesday, July 15, 2009 2:16 PM (36 seconds ago) Bookmark Suggest Ban Permalink

totally totally

i gotta say i thought macgregor was a great obi wan but its not hard to look good in those movies

seriously, the whole awesome thing about jabba in return of the jedi was he didn't move

they also double-teamed count dooku, an elderly man

Bad image. Very bad image.

i thought macgregor got the voice down 100% and he was ok in some ways, but his physical presence was nil imo

i gotta say i thought macgregor was a great obi wan but its not hard to look good in those movies

― rip dom passantino 3/5/09 never forget (max), Wednesday, July 15, 2009 2:17 PM (40 seconds ago) Bookmark Suggest Ban Permalink

he had the voice down and he seemed game but he had nothing to do but frown and scold

xp haha