Free as a Dodo: UK Politics Welcomes 2021

Kieth didn't even mention the GFA in his

he did a moving eulogy for the Diplock courts tho

If I could pass a law on jokes I would make a law that jokes had to be funny.

Joke rhymes with woke COINCIDENCE OR CONSPIRACY?

— Jess Phillips MP (@jessphillips) March 17, 2021

it's not every day you get your mind blown

I'm told Labour's Hartlepool selection process has produced a longlist of one. No confirmation from party so far.

— Sienna Rodgers (@siennamarla) March 18, 2021

two's a crowd one is a longlist

This gimp they've chosen knows fuck all about the area and was a Remain ultra. They aren't even trying.

Mandy was talking up what tough guys him and Blair were, with no reference to their mayoral candidate getting beaten by a football mascot in a monkey costume.

Let’s not forget, Jeremy Corbyn’s first by-election was Oldham West and Royton. Another “Labour Heartland” Red Wall seat in the post-industrial north.

Labour won with a 7.3% increase in their vote. That’s the bar for Starmer in Hartlepool.

— connor 🤝 (@C_Slomski) March 18, 2021

👀👀👀

You have 1 million followers. You knew, or should have known, that you were sending a bunch of tankie shitposters my way and this is your justification? Imagined hypocrisy? Wind your neck in.

— Dorian Lynskey (@Dorianlynskey) March 18, 2021

Lol, guy’s a prick and a half

i started to pull at the threads of that and jesus my life's worth more

at least he can be proud that arguably the best shitpost parody account of the last 5 years was at least partly inspired by his online presence. They can pulp all his garbage books and re-purpose the Remainacs server for bitcoin mining, but they'll never be able to take that away from him.

Imagine spending years trying to gain respect and status from the gatekeepers of literary credibility by writing a boring book when all you had to do was write Orwell_Fan after your @. I'd be furious too.

— Simon Hedges (@Orwell_Fan) March 18, 2021

Lmao, a biography of Orwell's '1984', what an absolute platinum grade wasteman

brigaded by the vile trolls again, simply for deliberately provoking them with lies and insults

— Shaun (@shaun_vids) January 27, 2020

Look there's a difference between being a tankie shitposter and thoughtfully pondering out loud about the hard left being mass murder apologists

It’s been confirmed that the oppressive and authoritarian #PoliceCrackdownBill has been delayed until ‘later in the year’ by @peterkyle MP.

It’s an incredible victory for @SistersUncut and everyone who turned up to the protests, made noise about it and contacted MPs pic.twitter.com/VMD6kCtncm

— Griff Ferris (@g__ferris) March 18, 2021

bloody hell that almost sounds like good news

xp not good news but it is something

Caught in 4K QLED in 2021 pic.twitter.com/6CPhRq10Xd

— Leave Black Women Alone We Are Tired (@judeinlondon2) March 18, 2021

in light of his posts from 2008 endorsing the Mummys curse i no longer support WhiteDarthMaul or his dream of becoming a Waiter

— wint (@dril) March 18, 2021

the parachuted into Hartlepool by Kieth cunt that will certainly lose, Dr Paul Williams.

the comically monikered fascist UKIP cunt Dr Max Gammon.

have never yet been seen in the same room

Lords ruling over us is it

Breaking: Supreme Court dismisses appeal in Mencap. The time a worker is required to sleep on site or nearby doesn't count towards minimum wage calculations. A sigh of relief for care organisations but a sad day for some of the poorest paid workers in society. #ukemplaw

— Jason Braier (@JasonBraier) March 19, 2021

jesus I used to moan like fuck about travel-time rates where we'd get paid a measly £2.25 per hour for the time it took to get to site, which could be often 3 hours + of your day depending on traffic. But I guess something was better than nothing at all.

Sleepover pay really felt better than nothing when I was doing that work but it was self-evidently a complete pisstake. The conclusion that the care sector would come to bits if it had to pay employees a living wage is dead right.

Imagine having to be at your workplace for a continuous 60+ hours and only two thirds of that time being paid at minimum wage

Scottish politics is an opportunist shitshow. People vote on party lines about whether or not evidence holds up and demand resignations because they can't command votes from the public.

No one gives a shit about the abuse or harassment at the heart of it.

The unionist parties have somehow ended up being cheerleaders for Salmond!

talking of opportunist shitshows, Kieth has been calling for Sturgeon to resign - he speaks straight from the shoulder does this lad - apart when it's tories who are under the spotlight.

Or the police. Whatever, it's another Tory idea Starmer is 100% in favour of.

Srsly? Ffs what a wazzock

lol idk why nobody seems to give a shit that sturgeon has also backed 600m of greensill loans to gupta, this seems like a much bigger shitshow, but i guess if the bbc focussed on this today they'd have to also mention that greensill was getting cameron to lobby the gov for contracts.

Even Kieth isn't pulling at that thread, it's about whether parliamentary codes of conduct have been broken or not that's important to him, lol. But he's a bit more chill about Tories who do much worse or his Longlist of one parachuted in byelection candidate who posts stuff like: which Tory milf would you fancy shagging?. I heard him on the radio saying "that was an unacceptable thing to post, but he's still a very good candidate". Come back and say that when he's lost a seat by 12000+ that has been Labour since 1974.

https://pbs.twimg.com/media/EwsVhovWEAIcNNm?format=jpg&name=medium

sum up the Northern Independence Party in a nutshell: idiot bookie shills

Ahead of the curve once again @Keir_Starmer

— Simon Hedges (@Orwell_Fan) March 20, 2021

lool

Wide-legged jeans are back to hide a year of pandemic pounds https://t.co/ZFzyR2fMdU pic.twitter.com/RXoVxLGutv

— New York Post (@nypost) March 19, 2021

pretty sure the pounds haven't gone to my legs

a young kid on an electric scooter called me a fat bastard the other day and sped off. At least it saves buying some digital smart scales!

spirit of community alive and well in hudds

not even looking lol, wish I'd get called a hairy bastard more often

JOKING

perhaps I should have thanked the kid for having the civility and self-restraint in not calling me "paedo" or "baldy"!

people who announce things are 'back' always show their arses

ty for the style tips nypost lol

apparently this was going on in London today

Odd no action by the police in relation to this anti-lockdown protest. Maybe they only feel safe piling in on peaceful women. pic.twitter.com/IeYY632Syv

— Tim Walker (@ThatTimWalker) March 20, 2021

In football terms it's called getting your retaliation in first.

https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-politics-56461679

Delusional.

Lord Mandelson said Sir Keir "radiates competence" and praised his stance in some of the internal battles during his first year as Labour leader.

as someone who was long term friends with Epstein and Ghislaine Maxwell perhaps this arsehole isn't the best one for assessing the qualities of party leaders either.

#killthebill protest in Bristol pic.twitter.com/2PNFHxnZpb

— Chris Rolandsen (@ChrisRolandsen_) March 21, 2021

The Tories and their media allies are undermining democracy. The opposition must win the next General Election and then rebuild our broken democracy. That means electoral cooperation in a Progressive Alliance.

Please put #FBPA (Follow Back #ProgressiveAlliance) in your profile.

— Nick Reeves #FBPE #FBPA #ProgressiveAlliance (@nickreeves9876) March 21, 2021

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