By Hera! Come anticipate WONDER WOMAN 1984 with me!

Gal Gadot is not especially interesting at any point in this Also this movie has the weirdest denouement where *** just walks the heck away, after *** and everybody is cool with it?

Also, what a horrendous Reagan. I was really hoping he’d stand up and be wearing the sweatpants.

And also also Kristin Wiig is upstaged by Michelle Pfeiffer’s performance from thirty years ago.

It did not occur to me to compare Wiig to Pfieffer as they are playing different characters in tonally-different realizations of the DC universe

One of the many things about this I don’t understand is why you’d at least attempt to include Washington DC period detail like Bad Brains and Commander Salamander but then have a distracting, pseudo-Ronald Reagan.

OMG – I was gonna jokingly ask (during that earlier riff) whether Commander Salamander showed up!

As a child of the 80s from the DC area, I think I’m gonna have to check this out just for those reasons.

Lots of DC deep cuts. And also a buncha bullshit.

But holy shit, when she lassos the rocket and hitches a ride? That was like Quest for Peace stupid. This movie is pretty much straight garbage.

Maybe I’m wrong, but It’s not so dumb:

Act I:

https://filmschoolrejects.com/wp-content/uploads/2019/10/MV5BMjhhMmQ3M2UtOGU3ZC00MWFkLWE0ZTMtYzg3ZjUyM2NlYzhhXkEyXkFqcGdeQXVyNjQ4ODE4MzQ@._V1_-750x416.jpg

https://img.cinemablend.com/quill/6/b/d/e/f/4/6bdef40c479423235e869de5ce51e3458f8fd99a.png

Act II:

https://medias.spotern.com/spots/w1280/262/262599-1575908352.jpg

https://www.writeups.org/wp-content/uploads/Catwoman-Pfeiffer-Batman-1992-movie-i.jpg

Act III:

https://64.media.tumblr.com/b8c29ece936cb1fb59cfabe9c0fc3b97/tumblr_inline_oguyrp5EPF1qdawwj_540.png

(WW84 scene w/ catlady and electricity)

I'll say this much, it was kinda fun to listen to my wife and daughter (other daughter made the right choice and skipped it) make fun of this, but joke was ultimately on us, because, this movie is two and a half hours long!!!!!!!

at some point, the stakes kinda don't feel real high when all it takes to undo to escalating events on screen is a dude saying "I RENOUNCE MY WISH". this might as well have been the show Wish Kid (featuring MacCauley Culkin)

so is this set in 1984? or does that mean something else?

also, why?

This was...well, it was. I actually liked a lot of the quieter parts -- the flying moments were at points almost visual tone poem stuff. Kinda glad I did just see it at home, though, breaks were needed for sure. Also great use of Frankie Goes to Hollywood's "Welcome to the Pleasuredome" though I'd love to know what crazy DJ was spinning that at THAT party.

The credits scene was pretty fun -- I remember wondering (re the character played in her earlier cameo) "I wonder why the one closeup on her eyes" and all was clear at the end.

Watched the first 15-20. I hate when modern "blockbuster" movies switch from mostly-real-people to animated for action sequences anyway, but the physics in this were Neil Breen-level distracting.

Also, gonna assume it was Geoff Johns' idea to have a secret black market for stolen historical artifacts located in a mall, several stories up, with no back door let alone rear street access. Motherfuckers smuggling sarcophagus-sized shit in under their coats, and out in shopping bags.

'visual tone poem' ??

Joy of flight stuff, I'm fine with it when done right. Sure I was worrying she was about to turn to him and go "Can you read my mind?" but anyway.

Remember when the Wachowskis made THE MATRIX and they sought out the best fight choreographer in the world at that time? What a concept. Crazy.

— Walter Chaw 周瑜 (@mangiotto) December 25, 2020

When she started flying my wife and daughter started cracking up. Maybe that's why all of us were so confused when she landed in full golden armor. My daughter suggested she flew home first to get it before her big fight. Sure, why not.

This was terrible and looked like shit, too.

I can only the imagine the direction given to the Mandalorian.

"No, go bigger! Bigger!!!!!"

I loved his wildly over-the-top performance!

The story was more imaginative and touching than I was expecting, and I liked Kristin Wiig's and Pedro Pascal's characters.

some of these reactions to that entirely not serious Cro-Mags tweet are nuts, I tell ya

I could see why they felt it was imperative this movie come out in 2020 because its villain is a Trump stand-in. Making the plot all about the danger of magic wishes is such a strange choice until you remember it was supposed to come out pre-election, and they were instructing the audience not to believe Trump’s lies and wild promises.

There was a Steven Soderbergh interview this month where he defended releasing these big tentpole movies on demand because they’re zeitgeist-y and have a limited shelf life. This movie is exhibit A for that reasoning.

Also the Trump figure gets to just walk away at the end and we never see him face legal consequences, which is a little preview of real life.

its villain is a Trump stand-in

completely insane to do this when, again, the producer of the first movie is the only one of the six appointees to remain in Trump's cabinet the entire term who worked directly with Trump, mouthpieced for him regularly, appeared frequently at photo ops, etc.

I can only the imagine the direction given to the Mandalorian.

had to DDG to see who that was.

There's no reason they couldn't have Irishmanned Sam Neill back to 1984 levels, so much of the rest of the picture is CGI.

so is this set in 1984? or does that mean something else?

1984 is the runtime.

Seriously, though, this really could have been set in just about any year. Maybe 1984 is before any of those other DC superheroes enter the scene? Speaking of which:

Why is a near-invincible demi-god wasting her time rescuing cats from trees and basically doing Spider-man week-one stuff? There's bad shit in the world in 1984, she could be putting her powers to good use.

For that matter, why does a striking, instantly recognizable person even need bother with an alter-ego? Kind of occurred to me that the Marvel heroes, more or less, all of them either never bothered with or immediately dispensed with the alter-ego bullshit. What does Wonder Woman get out of it?

So they find old planes at a secret Smithsonian spinoff site, one that just happened to be in good working order and fueled up? With a working, manned runway? And Steve's exclamation of "invisible jet!" ... he's never flown a jet, he doesn't even know the word. He died in like 1916.

Why did Kristen Wiig turn into a cat person?

Max Martin, did he have an end game with the wishes? Even before the ridiculously even by blockbuster standards "the particles are touching people!" bullshit, why grant random wishes to strangers? Like the guy that gets ... cows? For that matter, even my daughter wondered what happens if people make conflicting wishes. Like, what if someone had wished for, say, world peace, a pretty common wish? What if some asshole just wished everyone was dead? Why did he keep bleeding from his orifices? The Trump stuff was both obvious and toothless. While I suppose making Ned Beatty's Otis your antagonist could have had its pleasures, Pedro's semi-Trump was in the end just an old softy clown from a kids cartoon when he could have been a thoroughly corrupted ultimate evil with grand schemes bigger than "give me your oil!"

Major missed opportunity to make the magic tiki idol that actual original literal Monkey's Paw. Either way, that cursed tiki idol is easily the stupidest superhero plot since the later Christopher Reeve Superman sequels. When the missiles are launching and love conquers all in the corniest way possible, the got even more flashbacks to Quest for Peace.

Was totally surprised the trouble-making evil god Wonder Woman keeps alluding to never makes an appearance. Certainly I figured that was what was happening during that impenetrable magic wind storm in that secret hidden base (that had my wife making Austin Powers jokes).

And yeah, where did the armor come from? What good did it do her? Why can she suddenly fly? When she started flying I immediately thought of the Go Go's "Vacation: video:

https://media.tenor.com/images/f44fe83fc6a18c2b1b3554ed5b1741e4/tenor.gif

flashbacks to quest for peace? jeez am i going to like this movie

Be warned, it's a full hour longer than that one.

I didn’t like this movie but at least half of the questions you’re asking were answered within the confines of it

Really? I miss things all the time but I'm impressed I missed that many. Then again, I kept leaving the room, so I suppose it's possible I did so every time an explanation was given.

Let's just start with why Wiig turned into a cat person. I know she wanted more power or whatever, but ... why a cat? Did she have an affinity for cats? What did being a cat give her beyond the powers she had already? She was Cheetah and iirc she wasn't even particularly fast!

She said the line "I want to be an apex predator." Earlier in the movie she admired some item in an animal print. Boom, she's Cheetah.

This was so, so bad.

i was pretty stunned by how incompetent this was

I didn't hate it as much as y'all but I sure as hell wasn't entertained either. good movie to fuck to

mmmm, those pounding Hans Zimmer rhythms

I did catch the apex predator line, but I just didn't know why a cheetah, which is a really specific apex predator known for running fast. But, like, the cursed tiki idol power should have turned her into an orca or something. That would have been funny. But yeah, what does she gain that she didn't have before? Fur and a tail?

How was he just able to grant her another wish, anyway? With no touching and no apparent repercussions? I mean, this whole thing was so dumb and senseless and dull and stupid and janky I guess there is no point even asking.

He said the line "I'm feeling generous."

Since george orwell is out of copyright now, could totally set a superhero film in "1984".

"good movie to fuck to"

better to just put a picture of Gal Godot on your headboard

There are about 40 minutes of entertaining stuff in this film, and they are all Kristin Wiig. When she's not onscreen it's a slog, or dire, or worse. also the representations of middle easterners in this are ... let's just say this seemed like it was from 1984.

They could have made some more interesting political points with the US villain stepping in to 'take all the oil' from a country he's destabilized but it was pretty weak. Also I don't think that President was actually supposed to be Reagan, was he?

Also I don't think that President was actually supposed to be Reagan, was he?

In the credits, he's "POTUS." But there's a jar of jelly beans in the Oval Office (visible at 1:45:58).

Dude literally said “I take something for myself in return when I grant people’s wishes” right before saying “I’m feeling generous” to Barbara and then granting everyone’s wishes and so he turned over some of his “take something in return” bounty over to her so she could turn herself into a crazed half-cat woman and yes, the willy-nilly conflicting wishapalooza caused a bunch of turmoil and chaos including the advent of an impending thermonuclear war (btw, lifeless rubble across the globe after warheads melt everything could fit the definition of “world peace” so the warheads aren’t directly incompatible with that)

Also, the character Barbara Minerva in the comic books is a villain named Cheetah who got her powers from an amulet imbued with the essence of a malevolent cheetah goddess IIRC so her transformation was going to happen in some form or fashion

same basic concept underneath - she makes a sort of deal with the devil for power and ends up cursed

though i like the added sexual tension between her and Diana in this film

I just didn't know why a cat woman (other than because comic book). Since she already had super powers and afaict gained nothing but fur and a tail.

You know what this movie was really missing? A youthified digital Mr. T.

she goes from being one sort of cat lady to another
(half-joking here)

Wonder Woman 1982:

https://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/9/99/Cat_People_1982_movie.jpg

pretty much. as well as the Selina Kyle/Batman Returns comparison talked about earlier in the thread

also: women have to fight other women, femininity, apex predator, yada yada yada

People don’t like Wonder Woman 1984 because they haven’t seen a superhero movie in ten months and forgot they’re all like that.

— Brandon Bird (@Brandon_Bird) December 26, 2020

some of these reactions to that entirely not serious Cro-Mags tweet are nuts, I tell ya

I still say the reactions in this thread (at least mine) were keeping in the spirit - I wasn’t mad at the tweet, lol. Maybe you’re referring to responses on Twitter, though (I didn’t actually click thru)

That said I do think there’s a thing where when someone posts a tweet in a thread here, my immediate response is to go “yeah, but...” – not sure why. Maybe b/c it sort of sits there with a veil of inflated authority, intruding from beyond the realm of ILX discourse, demanding a counterpoint.

That NYMag pan is such a waste of a good panning opportunity