Alone in the Park - it's the Prem 2020-21 thread

The fake noise is dire and ridiculous.

I'm in favour of the crowd noise but they should probably consider adding canned laughter this season

just add Henny Youngman routines to Fulham's matches

Yakety-sax on repeat, idc. I just can't get over thinking "wow, someone's actually choosing to play the sound of the home crowd whistling in fury because of a supposed dive by someone from the visitors... does that make sense or is the one guy controlling the audio just trolling rn?" Not particularly helpful thoughts when trying to enjoy a match tbh. It's probably me.

best job in the world tbh

every manager ever - players are being asked to play too many games

owners - let's have some more midweek games in the weeks when no CL and a play off at the end of the season

fifa - we'll run it seeing as we're masters of probity

also can i just lol at chelsea naming petr cech in their 25 man prem squad. with vvd out lfc might as well name lawro.

The EA FIFA in game oohs and ahs seem more convincing and better timed. There must be a way to hook up the game to real time football feeds.

Maybe replace all the banners with green screen as well and have a proper fake crowd with pies and phones and and guys waving to the screen instead of the camera.

Cech even now probably an upgrade on Kepa.

[unintelligible battle fever]

Uh oh

this is, very specifically, exactly what we didn't want to happen

BAM3

bamfygol

fuck me how many shots has he had?

Southgate to stride out at full-time and officially hand Grealish's squad place to Bamford, in the form of a belt

I don't think Southgate could safely enter B6 without a load of feral men who think Grealish is their son instinctively swarming to tear him limb from limb

1995–2001
Aston Villa
191
(7)

I mean it's better than Bosko

During Balaban's time at Dinamo Zagreb, he had an incident with fascist salute,

this fucken country!

They're uh, they're a good side aren't they

27 shots, 9 on goal. jeez

Leeds tonight had 26 passes that were successfully received inside the penalty area. To put into context, Chelsea have had 60 of those in their first five games. pic.twitter.com/CirinIeEiX

— Dániel Katona (@DanielKatona17) October 23, 2020

As far as I can tell, despite six goals already this season, literally no one has any idea whether Patrick Bamford is a good player or not.

Bamfordowski certainly was good last night. Strikers mature and finishing is usually the last thing to stick.

utd-chelsea with theworst opening 15 mins this season. truly dire fare.

lol, how did Maguire get away with that choke hold?

Terrible match so far.

Utd have been the slightly better team

Ole's love for Dan James continues to confound

how that maguire challenge isn't ruled a pen i'll never know. look frwd to some bullshit var excuse over next couple of days
xp

"it wasn't a pen because he wasn't using the chokehold to make himself bigger"

This is an outrageous double substitution for a fundamentally shit team to be making.

McTominay is a crushingly poor footballer

"Marcus! They'll just spend it all on drugs, tattoos and Sky TV, you know that, don't you?" pic.twitter.com/wKMfWOslFE

— MrPaulRobinson (@MrPaulRobinson) October 24, 2020

idg coming to Old Trafford and playing for a draw. Chelsea have put no pressure on the defence at all.

That was fine, considering

Chelsea's vaunted forwards showed fuck all

Two mediocre sides who made no meaningful attempt to win, neither could have had any complaints if they had lost. A truly atrocious game of football.

— Colin Millar (@Millar_Colin) October 24, 2020

Clearly not a student of the game

One for the purists.

You'll have all wanted to sit through our boys downing Team Dommy P in a gale earlier. No passing, no guile, just wind, rain, a goal from a corner scramble scored by Darren Pratley and a faintly comical og. Bliss

i missed all the fun due to being busy, now I'm stuck watching MLS, Orlando vs Miami, where Gonzalo Higuain will not be playing against us as he got red carded previous match. lol...#retirementleague

Kieron Dyer go fuck yourself kthx

Interesting to see so many of our nominal title rivals stuttering as well this weekend. The way this season's going you wouldn't bet against some underdog team like one of the Manchester clubs sneaking into the Champions League places and making themselves famous. You love to see it really

Podence looking like he wants a birthday goal

Can we get a rona test for Raul please?

We really need to stop playing Saiss as a wing back

Not a bad half. Semedo seems to be doing pretty well?

Newcastle seem to be comfy just parking and countering

like the rest of the team, Somedo is playing better without really being good. Podence showboating has been the only entertainment so far. I'm pretty sure these first halfs are like this on purpose ffs

I won't say that was worth the wait but it almost was

Nice technique but it should have been fairly straightforward for Darlow