Alone in the Park - it's the Prem 2020-21 thread

var managed to make the in ground experience of watching football terrible last season and having achieved that has moved on to making viewing at home wholly unsatisfying too. congratulations.

it's just aggravating because World Cup 2018 managed to use it so unobtrusively and instead of learning from that, they decided fans wanted more hyper-officiated football.

unless you're a relegation zone team who can literally only tie or beat the giants with this kind of luck, I doubt that's true (and hell I doubt fans of those squads want it either!).

it will wind up being like NFL football, where they made the roughing the passer rules so ridiculous that defenders started injuring themselves contorting their bodies trying to tackle the QB the very limited way they were allowed.

IMO cut defenders arms off, only solution

Cheeky monkeys

Absolutely outrageous from Vardy.

OK I like football again.

City made the classic mistake of getting an early goal. You need to wait a bit longer to score the first one.

Very weird watching a Guardiola team playing it long to Rory Delap's son.

Took vardy out my fantasy team this week

Huzzah a game not dictated by shit reffing

Cmon Wolves, give this shower the gubbing they deserve

Fuuuck come on. I saw that coming. Someone converge

Fucking idiocy, gifted the goal

That was a dire half

Dogshit, embarrassing

Plenty of time etc but ffs

Not crisp on the ball, getting murdered on counter attack, shit marking.

But it's only 1-0 somehow.

Give em hell, Nuno

Back to the old "we improve second half" thang ffs

And it gets worse

Stick a fork in me

Moyes should stop home permanently.

Aight I'm out. This is youth league defending

It's a shit business

Nothing about this is undeserved

Fulham and Leeds next opponents.

Hopefully that's a relief

We were poor at the start of last season, it's very nil desperandum but ffs

Gash tonight

Appreciate there's a lot of risk around the pandemic, but not sure this approach of randomly generating the results is appropriate

Also last year I could still go out for another few hours

If there was any justice our lads should be suffering my hangover this morning

Had a fucking awful day.

Just got home as got 2 flat tyres on the m5, lost my wallet, & to top it off I just managed to step barefoot in catshit.

Today can fuck off.

Time to watch my recording of mighty Wolves vs the Hammers.

No-one tell us the score, cheers #wwfc 🤞🏻🐺

— OldGold80 (@OGold80) September 27, 2020

😬

Not sure Fulham will reach Derby’s 2007/2008 points total at this rate.

Think they've got us coming up soon, should settle their nerves

Was gonna say over the weekend I think Fulham will go down but I don't see them being 9pts in a season flameouts, they'll get it down on the deck and play some nice stuff and surprise a couple of teams or whatever ¯\(°_o)/¯

As Nult would say this season so far has been one where one would not feel emboldened to make definitive, long-term predictions, but in retrospect perhaps Fulham's obvious total unawareness that opposition attackers may sometimes move should probably have suggested a problem to me

What do we reckon, five all?

certainly look as though we'll be good for a couple of pennos in the current climate but i'm not gonna worry, not with Ice Cold Emi Martinez in goal.

we still look pretty bad in many important ways. passing the ball from one player to the other for eg

Is John McGinn "back"? Two assists and a textbook marseille roulette before half time

LOL EVEN MCGINN IS AT IT pic.twitter.com/mVg5vBQ4pe

— Tøbiàs 🦁 (@AVFCTobias) September 28, 2020

yeah lol you could see what he was gonna try as he raced into contact, ngl i cheered

sincere appreciation too in this house for Trezeguet sprinting from right to left and back again, beating several defenders, losing the ball, winning it back, passing it on and making a run into the box, going like the clappers the whole time, before finally crashing face first into the turf when he inevitably ran out of gas at the crucial moment. go on son

Industrial-grade ketchup on that 0.8 Girosflin from the wee man. Bedlam in the ends. Fulham got straight-up Ultra Naté'd

Did I miss a third goal because I was composing a risible Mundial spoof post? Yes

go on rule that shit out

Martinez did not drop a clanger, that is fake newa

Don't call it a comeback

Not sure Fulham will reach Derby’s 2007/2008 points total at this rate

At this stage I'm wondering if they'll reach Swindon's goal's conceded record.

didn't have tierney down as a typical arsenal primadonna

wah my poor face wah

get tae fuck

scotland's other left-back having a moment there mind

tierney hits back by being absolutely ruined for the equaliser

and that's that little face-off settled

Pep might not like having a negative GD at the moment but a solemn reminder that Stoke lost their first ever league game 2-0 and that was the closest they've ever been to zero overall pic.twitter.com/oiYlSB6eKr

— Duncan Alexander (@oilysailor) September 28, 2020

lol