Joe Biden, Senator from Citibank (oops, DELAWARE), to Run for President

my recommended picks in my email to Biden:

Barbara Lee
Wanda Sykes
anyone but Rice or Harris

loll hadrian/pom

just pick nina turner and call it a day

Can't spell "Moroni" without "moron."

can't spell "Biden" without "die", "bid", "Ned", "bin", "dine", "bind", "bend", or "den"

wait a second, look at that word again, Moroni. now rearrange the letters:

i moron

rearrange one more time

I R Moon

not to be cap'n save jesus but I don't think it's that weird to treat a new "religion" with an unbroken track record of intimidation, gaslighting, fraud and almost certainly murder differently from the ones millions or even billions have belonged to over centuries

Let's just start with the centuries-old one that runs an international paedophile ring, with the support of prime ministers, then

Best of luck to those who want a Democratic campaign platform of "down with Christianity." It's a sure election winner.

The Lavey Party

I don't think the "down with Christianity" cohort is anywhere near converting itself into an organized political force instead a vague group milling around clutching its ideas. They need to do a lot more organizing and create more coherent and effective propaganda before they have any hope of exercising significant political muscle in a national election.

Just so you all know, I proudly worship at First New Christian Fellowship Baptist Church in South LA. pic.twitter.com/1sEpF5KpRF

— Karen Bass (@KarenBassTweets) August 1, 2020

in Florida she will be the candidate who proudly served under Fidel Castro.

as Twitter Nixon said, changing no votes

Twixon

Twicky Dick

Tweep Throat

Twaitor

2-week delay in naming veep, sez WaPo

they could blow it again

makes sense tbh, why strain for the spotlight when yr opponent is busy fucking up

delay from what? did they announce a date?

This veep shit is overblown anyway, no one cares -- at this moment -- except Chuck Todd types.

What veep would Todd Chuck pick if a Todd Chuck could Chuck Todd

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EbTcHpPDCu8

no one cares -- at this moment -- except Chuck Todd types

Chuck Todd got a substantial demotion today, btw - his midafternoon MSNBC show is being moved to 1 PM and cut to 1 hour, and Nicolle Wallace is getting two hours from 4 to 6.

They said it was gonna be this week. xxxp

Who's "they"?

something jerry hairston jr said, probably

Bernie Horowitz

km lol

pretty sure it was a leak from Camp Joe

so, Chris Dodd or someone even younger

i haven't heard anything about a schedule, i don't think there's any evidence of a delay, and if the plan has changed it's just as easy to attribute that to not wanting to interrupt trump while he continues publicly throwing up on himself as it is to ... problems? i dunno what the implication is here.

the ghost of Bill Clinton whispered it to Morbs in a curiously sweaty dream

why strain for the spotlight when yr opponent is busy fucking up

so, will be named on Jan 20

tbh not a bad idea

Delay? That just puts it during the convention, which is SOP. I never figured Biden would announce his veep until the convention anyway.

tbf to morbs

https://www.washingtonpost.com/politics/bidens-delay-in-choosing-a-vp-intensifies-jockeying-between-potential-picks/2020/08/02/6eea5068-d4d2-11ea-930e-d88518c57dcc_story.html

Biden’s timeline for picking a vice president has slipped significantly. He initially said he would make the decision by Aug. 1, then said it would be the first week of August. Now the campaign is signaling that it will likely wait until the second week of August.

on the other hand

In other words, Biden waiting is totally normal. https://t.co/BOKrQtCEAh

— Geoffrey Skelley (@geoffreyvs) August 3, 2020

Left off Cruz-Fiorina

started writing a series of mystery novels where a retired joe biden solves murders in Delaware, punctuating his statements with folksy exhortations. ("listen jack!" being a catchphrase of sorts). on my 10th manuscript, no publisher.

"No Malarkey," by Tree S. Hip. Now a major motion picture starring Gary Sinise as Joe Biden

treeship that's quite an image.

good luck getting Sinise to play a liberal

Fair point. My first thought was George Peppard, but it turns out he's been dead for twenty years.

Perfect!

started writing a series of mystery novels where a retired joe biden solves murders in Delaware, punctuating his statements with folksy exhortations. ("listen jack!" being a catchphrase of sorts). on my 10th manuscript, no publisher.

well, yeah. someone beat you to it:
https://www.penguinrandomhouse.com/series/D42/obama-biden-mysteries

good luck getting Sinise to play a liberal

Oh, that's what Biden is! Been great at keeping it a secret.

xp: Behind the Bastards did a reading from one of those novels in today's episode

https://www.iheart.com/podcast/105-behind-the-bastards-29236323/episode/we-read-an-unbearably-thirsty-joe-69435764/?embed=true

well, yeah. someone beat you to it:
https://www.penguinrandomhouse.com/series/D42/obama-biden-mysteries

― Muswell Hillbilly Elegy (President Keyes), Tuesday, August 4, 2020 11:11 AM (one hour ago) bookmarkflaglink

lmao

My favorite was Hope You Didn't Die From That Drone.

Vice President Joe Biden is fresh out of the Obama White House and feeling adrift when his favorite railroad conductor dies in a suspicious accident