Posts you had second thought about and decided not to post on the "Posts you had second thought about and decided not to post - put them here" thread - put them here

maybe i am generalizing -- maybe married women didn't get the same abusive / creepy treatment -- maybe because i am creepy i got treated like garbage by dudes -- who knows! I also have a few entertaining stories, and at least one of the creepy dudes later apologized and we are friends now.

maybe because i am creepy i got treated like garbage by dudes

You don't really mean this… at least I hope not.

sarahell is being mordant there

it's kinda a mindfuck the way this place has changed -- like idk Branwell has dealt with it much more intensively than I -- and there is a psychological thing where, when you are used to being attacked all the time (regardless of whether you were the instigator or not -- I don't want to cast myself as a victim), you end up getting defensive and assuming you are being attacked even when you aren't, so things become battles when they don't have to be

Maybe I would have more sympathy with the poster involved if they hadn't decided to throw what I thought was our friendship in a raging fire by sending me a viciously abusive message, for having the absolute temerity to warn them that they might be repeatedly misgendering someone.

sadly some people have a horrible history of being personally very nasty to people and they never apologise for it and that leads to them never getting the benefit of the doubt.

Maybe I would have more sympathy with the poster involved if they hadn't decided to throw what I thought was our friendship in a raging fire by sending me a viciously abusive message, for having the absolute temerity to warn them that they might be repeatedly misgendering someone.

― emil.y, Wednesday, July 29, 2020 3:21 PM (twenty minutes ago)

shocked, shocked etc

no I won't be glib, that's exactly the kind of behavior one learns to expect from this kind of person if you hang around them long enough.

i'm also super wary of pile-ons which is what this is starting to feel like, because I remember having that happen to me at one point --

but also, as a corollary to the "being used to being attacked thing" re ilx, for folx who are regularly attacked IRL because of their identity, where ilx is a safe(r) space for them, a well-intentioned post that seems similar to the IRL grossness is also likely to provoke that defensive response -- and if we want to be decent people, we should be sensitive to that.

needs to be both ways, sara

If you treat someone like shit they will treat you back the same way

and that's not aimed at any person.

that was meant in Brad's defense ... so idk what you are referring to?

also re DJP being weirded out about all the black metal threads being bumped

sadly some people have a horrible history of being personally very nasty to people and they never apologise for it and that leads to them never getting the benefit of the doubt.

Some people do actually suck, and are bad people to have around your clubhouse

No AFAB or AMAB on here please, just ACAB.

I do not like ice cream

Ice cream is good.

assigned cantaloupe at birth

I do not like ice cream

xp

I like to think mh was posting in bad faith.

if it wasn't for bad faith we'd have no faith at all

— quarantine idle (@smk73) July 31, 2020

I like to think mh was posting in bad faith.

are there people that are Assigned COPS at Birth??

https://academic.oup.com/nar/article-abstract/18/23/7177/2388940

Good old NAR

the haagen dazs with whiskey flavor -- is really fucking delicious

Extraaz is amazing, had it for the first time the other day.

really sad that three twins went out of business -- their cardamom was my fave

really fucked up but lol jfc

are you laughing at the discontinuation of my favorite ice cream, Florida Man????

Wow it’s so surprising to me that so many cis men post on ilx

we are your fathers and brothers, your neighbors, your fellow citizens, silby. we are many, but we are various. we contain multitudes.

I would suggest refraining from doing the “not all men” thing

struggling to figure out which thread this belongs to.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mise_en_abyme_(in_literature_and_other_media)

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mise_en_abyme?wprov=sfti1

Unfortunately not literally.

Really glad I didn’t post anything flippant about noted author Adolf Hitler’s suicide now

i hate having crushes tbh

crushes suck. i am stating this as a fact.

It is not at all apparent whether there is or is not an intentional conversation taking place here.

i miss the hypothetical possibility of a crush tbh

same

Aching Desire For One True Love Separated By Fate Still No Match For A Good Porkin’ https://t.co/utsSI90si9 pic.twitter.com/X03fFw72wy

— The Onion (@TheOnion) August 6, 2020

The experience of a real crush in the moment is often, maybe even mainly, negative but I can’t help but rep for something so thoroughly unproductive

you know, it genuinely did not occur to me before, like, just now, how often the phrase "dysphoria" occurs in "infinite jest". i haven't revisited it since that one indeterminate year in the late 1990s i spent plowing through it while waiting for the bus.

in one sense it's not surprising that the concept of gender dysphoria comes up in infinite jest - goddamn near _everything_ comes up in infinite jest. it is a Novel About Everything. in another sense... it wasn't a concept i commonly came across in the 1990s. dfw talked about lots of things i had no idea about, like tennis, often through confusing and unexplained references, and in any case i had already decided definitively that i was Definitely Not Trans so whatever the hell he was talking about had no bearing on me whatsoever.

i wonder what i might find were i to choose to reread that book.

most of my memory of dfw, these days, comes from my much more recent (shortly after it came out) reading of "the pale king", which i found striking in how thoroughly and completely dfw failed to understand boredom, the topic he was allegedly writing a novel about. i mean, on par with black sabbath writing a song about clinical depression and calling it "paranoid", that level of complete misunderstanding.

I am overdue for a break for the internet but

Jeez is that all you guys think about