RIP Jair Bolsonaro

judging by his pic above, he looks like the first person to go through rigor mortis while he was still alive

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oydMFd40p7w

I swear, this dude gets coronavirus every other week

can he be like Jesus and take all of the Coronavirus in the world on himself*, and then die it all away

*and save some for Trump, Orban, Doug Ford, and Matteo Salvini

Later on Tuesday, he posted a video to Facebook of him taking his third dose of hydroxychloroquine, which has also been promoted by President Donald Trump.

“Today I’m a lot better, so certainly it’s working,” Bolsonaro said, downing the dose with a glass of water. “We know today there are other remedies that can help fight the coronavirus. We know none of them have their efficacy scientifically proven, but I’m one more person for whom this is working. So I trust hydroxychloroquine. And you?”

Nope

he should inject bleach

“Masks are for fags” says Jair Bolsonaro after announcing he has tested positive for COVID-19. https://t.co/zOLAlEPKCt

— Brasil Wire (@BrasilWire) July 8, 2020

incredible

lmao

like i know that's awful but my only reaction is lmao

Jair Rogan

It's going to be so awful if he gets a genuinely mild or asymptomatic case. Hundreds of thousands of people could die.

it’s imperative for public heath that he dies a protracted, painful and public death

He's nine years older than BJ, so there's still hope.

As per The Guardian:

Brazil’s President Jair Bolsonaro has vetoed provisions of a law that required the federal government to provide drinking water, disinfectants and a guarantee of hospital beds to indigenous communities amid the pandemic. Bolsonaro, who has tested positive for coronavirus, vetoed 16 parts of the law on efforts to address the coronavirus threat to the indigenous population, but still allowed for provisions on adequate testing, ambulance services and medical equipment.

*errr, per The Guardian

back in his happy place

- Comecei a passar mal após o almoço de domingo.
- Cheguei ao hospital às 03h00 de hoje.
- Me colocaram sonda nasogástrica.
- Mais exames serão feitos para possível cirurgia de obstrução interna na região abdominal. pic.twitter.com/NPgv6HwoHj

— Jair M. Bolsonaro (@jairbolsonaro) January 3, 2022

dammit I hoped he was really dead

According his own doctor, Bolsonaro was hospitalized because he did not chew shrimps he had for lunch on Sunday 🤦‍♀️ https://t.co/43GwOL9KqU

— Nathália Urban (@UrbanNathalia) January 5, 2022

his covid levels are getting dangerously low

"chew the shrimp" set to the tune of Spill the Wine

Euphemisms-R-Us

i am picturing an x-ray showing whole undigested shrimp with tails on them just bouncing around in there

eat the gecko jair

The is jair bait at this stage

RIP shrimp

I've opened this thread three times today, and each time expected him to be dead for real.

"Started by Οὖτις"

^^^

Mostly Jair's home. He can pause Forrest Gump and go fold the laundry or heat up a burrito or stuff his butt full of shrimp while thinking about the Amazon delivery person.

I hear he ate so many shrimps he got iodine poisoning

Fuck I hate these threads and their false promises

will you fucking people stop reviving this thread? Dante punished those who raised false hopes in the hearts of men.

well the Jair store called

well I had sex with YOUR wife!

this man is condemned to live forever in an eternally-decaying body

Hours before meeting with dozens of ambassadors from different countries, Bolsonaro admitted to his supporters that he was not feeling well, that he had a fever and coughed a lot. pic.twitter.com/LaJqW4JC2G

— Nathália Urban (@UrbanNathalia) July 18, 2022

Fifth time's the charm. Sixth? Seventh?

my man looking good as hell

Brazil's lame duck President Jair Bolsonaro, who has only averaged about 25 minutes of work per day since becoming the first incumbent to ever lose a presidential election, has been rushed to the armed forces hospital in Brasília with abdominal pain. https://t.co/q5GBCflqDt

— BrianMier (@BrianMteleSUR) November 18, 2022

dealing with his loss by stress-eating shrimp

Yeah, Pepto-Bismol ain't gonna be enough for that dude

Classic photo.

http://i.cdn.turner.com/asfix/repository/8a25c392109799c3011098b1d6f40001/thumbnail_36295.jpg

Brazil’s reclusive Bolsonaro has a skin infection, ‘cannot wear pants’ https://t.co/gRkXBSpBky

— Jeremy / anti-partisan (@Moderateleft) November 19, 2022

lol... check out this delicate hothouse flower. He'll have to spend the rest of his life in a plastic bubble.

Bolsanaro health conditions, ranked

— Gabrielle Bluestone (@g_bluestone) November 19, 2022

God I was hoping the RIP was real this time. That man must have cat DNA.

Generalissimo Francisco Bolsonaro

Brasputin

uhhhhh

In which Jair Bolsonaro takes a polygraph test live on air, says that he was sexually "initiated" by raping chickens, and decides in retrospect that it would've been "smarter ... [to] go after the calves, the donkeys ..." https://t.co/V1nVS7dRQb

— ★ (@corpseinorbit) December 4, 2022

who's chryon now

"so did he or did he not fuck the chicken" should be the way all UN talks close from now on

Jair getting into John Waters territory here.

again i cry you should never judge ppl by their looks and again the words die on my lips

― mark s, Monday, 9 January 2023 bookmarkflaglink

BREAKING 🇧🇷: Minister of the Supreme Court Alexandre de Moraes has ruled for the arrest of Anderson Torres, the disgraced Security Secretary of the Federal District who oversaw Sunday’s insurrection from his holiday in the United States. pic.twitter.com/H4Xm3RXOmL

— David Adler (@davidrkadler) January 10, 2023

jair bolsonaro post yr gamertag u coward

Jair Bolsonaro, former president of Brazil, appears playing Farpoint on his Playstation VR. pic.twitter.com/cdRc17oJw7

— Crazy Ass Moments in LatAm Politics (@AssLatam) January 17, 2023

attacked by bees

That's right

Highly intelligent creatures

there was an early show of honey mining bees in my garden this summer but the tree in my garden hasn't attracted any significant bee presence at all this summer. I was worried until I just found they'd enlisted for overseas anti-fascist operations 👍

Keep 'em comin'

Brazil’s former president Jair Bolsonaro will stand trial for allegedly orchestrating a violent plot to seize power through a military coup, after the country’s supreme court decided he should face criminal prosecution.

The ruling leaves the far-right populist, who governed Brazil from 2019 until the end of 2022, facing political oblivion and a possible jail sentence of more than 40 years.

Florida man commits coup in Brazil

https://vermelho.org.br/wp-content/uploads/2019/10/1j91uflyoeawkphcb71dyca132013.jpeg

^ Compares well to Trump's Georgia mug shot.

https://i.insider.com/64e7fba2a7adf70019079464?width=700

https://www.theguardian.com/film/2025/dec/08/jim-caviezel-jair-bolsonaro-biopic

Jim Caviezel, who played Jesus in Mel Gibson’s 2004 film The Passion of the Christ, is reportedly filming a “heroic” portrait of the rightwing ex-politician in secret. Dark Horse, directed by Cyrus Nowrasteh and written by Mário Frias, who served as secretary of culture under Bolsonaro, started shooting three months ago in Brazil, where Bolsonaro served as president from 2019 until 2023.

maybe in this version everyone beats the shit out of bolsonaro all the time

just pictured Caviezel in a hospital bed with a tube up his nose and cracked up

Stations of the Covid

https://bsky.app/profile/did:plc:uemns7yqb62n5kpwe34wgdhs/post/3mlzhv7eqek2v

It seems to me like the English-language internet has not yet been turned on to the fact that the screenplay for the Bolsonaro biopic (starring Jim Caviezel) has been leaked to the press. It is... a fascinating document, let's say.

NEWS IMAGES & NARRATION...a capsule of events in Brazil: 1B

-- In B&W we see the end of the military dictatorship, 1980s.

-- Dozens of Communist/Socialist uprisings highlighted on A MAP of Latin America, spreading like a festering disease.

maybe they can score Brett Ratner to direct