in which we list our own cv19 symptoms (speculative)

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52. uneven beard

― ole uncle tiktok (darraghmac), Thursday, 26 March 2020 08:13 (six years ago)

53. perforated fringe

― a struggle to make meat-snacking fit (bizarro gazzara), Thursday, 26 March 2020 08:45 (six years ago)

54. Persistant dry opinions

― calzino, Thursday, 26 March 2020 08:47 (six years ago)

55. perineal fog

― a struggle to make meat-snacking fit (bizarro gazzara), Thursday, 26 March 2020 08:51 (six years ago)

56. idiopathic foreskin

― a struggle to make meat-snacking fit (bizarro gazzara), Thursday, 26 March 2020 08:53 (six years ago)

57. I'm alive

― Wuhan!! Got You All in Check (Camaraderie at Arms Length), Thursday, 26 March 2020 08:57 (six years ago)

58. hot heart and moist brain

― felt jute gyte delete later (wins), Thursday, 26 March 2020 08:57 (six years ago)

59. clothes ripped like the incredible hulk

― ole uncle tiktok (darraghmac), Thursday, 26 March 2020 09:03 (six years ago)

60. enlarged navel fluff

― Le Bateau Ivre, Thursday, 26 March 2020 09:06 (six years ago)

61. cuticle arrhythmia

― a struggle to make meat-snacking fit (bizarro gazzara), Thursday, 26 March 2020 09:12 (six years ago)

62. Increased spousal sensitivity to unvarnished patio furniture

― ole uncle tiktok (darraghmac), Thursday, 26 March 2020 09:14 (six years ago)

63. shortness of sockets

― ole uncle tiktok (darraghmac), Thursday, 26 March 2020 10:21 (six years ago)

64. incorrect use of semicolons

― karmic blowback for dissing pip and jane baker (Autumn Almanac), Thursday, 26 March 2020 10:46 (six years ago)

fuck i need tested; asap

― ole uncle tiktok (darraghmac), Thursday, 26 March 2020 10:54 (six years ago)

65. urethral logorrhea

― Unparalleled Elegance (Old Lunch), Thursday, 26 March 2020 10:58 (six years ago)

66. mixcloud play queue now 3,000 NTS shows long

― a passing spacecadet, Thursday, 26 March 2020 11:03 (six years ago)

67. Matt Bianco earworm

― Wuhan!! Got You All in Check (Camaraderie at Arms Length), Thursday, 26 March 2020 11:10 (six years ago)

69. trouble with adhering to sequenced lists

― karmic blowback for dissing pip and jane baker (Autumn Almanac), Thursday, 26 March 2020 11:13 (six years ago)

68. Can’t suffer a gap

― rawdogging the pandemic (hardcore dilettante), Thursday, 26 March 2020 11:16 (six years ago)

70. Soccer tongue*

* (imago has this symptom)

― rawdogging the pandemic (hardcore dilettante), Thursday, 26 March 2020 11:17 (six years ago)

71. recurring fits of 'agronomist's complaint'

― Unparalleled Elegance (Old Lunch), Thursday, 26 March 2020 11:17 (six years ago)

72. trap in

― consultant haste (gyac), Thursday, 26 March 2020 11:23 (six years ago)

73. soldiers' pay
74. mosquitoes
75. sartoris
76. the sound
77. the fury

― Unparalleled Elegance (Old Lunch), Thursday, 26 March 2020 11:25 (six years ago)

78. feverish hot takes

― calzino, Thursday, 26 March 2020 11:27 (six years ago)

79. switching to instant coffee, but not for reasons of budgeting or supply

― karmic blowback for dissing pip and jane baker (Autumn Almanac), Thursday, 26 March 2020 11:30 (six years ago)

80. my eyes switched places

― Unparalleled Elegance (Old Lunch), Thursday, 26 March 2020 11:33 (six years ago)

81. feet are exactly one foot long

― epistantophus, Thursday, 26 March 2020 11:36 (six years ago)

82. uncaring hair

― epistantophus, Thursday, 26 March 2020 11:36 (six years ago)

83. undiagnosed ability to juggle

― epistantophus, Thursday, 26 March 2020 11:38 (six years ago)

84. every other toe is on fire
85. heart on sleeve
86. adequate knuckles

― epistantophus, Thursday, 26 March 2020 11:40 (six years ago)

87. a sudden and demonstrated preference for spiral bound notebooks, specifically those ones where the wire spiral binding curls inwards slightly at the ends so it doesn’t get caught on your jumper

― karmic blowback for dissing pip and jane baker (Autumn Almanac), Thursday, 26 March 2020 11:43 (six years ago)

88. excessive and unexplained bleeding from hand after driving letter opener through hand

― Unparalleled Elegance (Old Lunch), Thursday, 26 March 2020 11:50 (six years ago)

89. Speculative post mortem

― American Fear of Pranksterism (Ed), Thursday, 26 March 2020 11:51 (six years ago)

90. ham fists, chicken legs

― epistantophus, Thursday, 26 March 2020 11:52 (six years ago)

91. remembers the movie Short Circuit 2 with fondness

― epistantophus, Thursday, 26 March 2020 11:55 (six years ago)

88. male menstruation

― a struggle to make meat-snacking fit (bizarro gazzara), Thursday, 26 March 2020 11:59 (six years ago)

93. baker’s cough
94. ears taped shut

― epistantophus, Thursday, 26 March 2020 12:11 (six years ago)

95. reverse pooping

― Unparalleled Elegance (Old Lunch), Thursday, 26 March 2020 12:41 (six years ago)

just realized 93 is actually a thing :(

― epistantophus, Thursday, 26 March 2020 12:46 (six years ago)

Perhaps you meant 'banker's cough'?

― Unparalleled Elegance (Old Lunch), Thursday, 26 March 2020 12:47 (six years ago)

calz two contributions are possibly the best things to come out of this entire situation imo

― ole uncle tiktok (darraghmac), Thursday, 26 March 2020 12:52 (six years ago)

Hadrian and OL brought the lols

― epistantophus, Thursday, 26 March 2020 12:56 (six years ago)

96. vague, existential unease

― epistantophus, Thursday, 26 March 2020 12:58 (six years ago)

97. Feverish shitposting

― consultant haste (gyac), Thursday, 26 March 2020 13:17 (six years ago)

98. Increased daytime access to food and booze, leading to excess eating and drinking.

― Why, I would make a fantastic Nero! (PBKR), Thursday, 26 March 2020 13:19 (six years ago)

Lol these are all song lyrics.

― Josh in Chicago, Thursday, 26 March 2020 13:32 (six years ago)

99. pancreatic amnesia

― a struggle to make meat-snacking fit (bizarro gazzara), Thursday, 26 March 2020 13:42 (six years ago)

100. clear plastic golf trousers

― epistantophus, Thursday, 26 March 2020 13:46 (six years ago)

101. sudden ability to play the trumpet (as-yet-untested, tbf)

― Unparalleled Elegance (Old Lunch), Thursday, 26 March 2020 13:47 (six years ago)

102. Black smoke belching from open mouth.

― Matt DC, Thursday, 26 March 2020 13:48 (six years ago)

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178. Inexplicable taste of pink floyd in my head

― Eschew things thirty two times before swallowing them (darraghmac), Sunday, 27 June 2021 23:15 (four years ago)

179. illegible tattoos
180. woke cat
181. the power of Greyskull

― epistantophus, Tuesday, 29 June 2021 11:52 (four years ago)

six months pass...

182. Urine > 99°C

― pandmac (darraghmac), Sunday, 9 January 2022 09:07 (four years ago)

183. Strangely attracted to Everest from Paw Patrol.

― two sleeps till brooklyn (ledge), Sunday, 9 January 2022 09:12 (four years ago)

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