US Politics, March 2020 — There’s a very good chance you’re not going to die.

Maybe we turn them, ILX has sleeper agents

What’s next: At the end of the 15-day period, there will likely be a serious clash between the public health experts — who will almost certainly favor a longer period of nationwide social distancing and quarantining — versus the president and his economic and political aides, who are anxious to restart the economy.

also what's next: a serious clash between millions of people who listen to public health experts and people who attend donald trump rallies

We should trick them into entering an arena for a rally and then lock the doors.

Oh good, a real life wall of death.

Xpost I know we miss concerts but c'mon

who, I ask, is the Richard Thompson of our times?

This may induce tremors but so be it:

Social distancing Miami MAGA-style: At least 10 Trump flags flying from boats yesterday at the packed #WhatCorona Haulover Sandbar gathering #BecauseMiami (video: @DavidVergel97) https://t.co/A5ZW8kDoaW pic.twitter.com/HHS4LlymUQ

— Billy Corben (@BillyCorben) March 22, 2020

So has anyone done the calculations on how long we need to hole up in our homes until the MAGAs have managed to wipe themselves out completely? Because I'm in it for the long haul, however long it takes.

who, I ask, is the Richard Thompson of our times?

Different wall of death:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7LtUIl42aPk

I wonder if Trump keeps calling himself a 'wartime president' because he plans to sacrifice a bunch of lives in service of the all mighty stock market number

WE CANNOT LET THE CURE BE WORSE THAN THE PROBLEM ITSELF. AT THE END OF THE 15 DAY PERIOD, WE WILL MAKE A DECISION AS TO WHICH WAY WE WANT TO GO!

— Donald J. Trump (@realDonaldTrump) March 23, 2020

"the problem itself" is that half the country gets this and 2% of them die, which would be about 3,000,000

CAN YOU REPEAT THAT FROGBS I'M HAVING TROUBLE UNDERSTANDING BECAUSE THE LETTERS AREN'T BIG ENOUGH FOR ME

WAS WORRIED I HAD MISSED DAILY YELLING TIME

I SAAAAAAAAAID, CAN YOU REPEAT THAT FROGBS I'M HAVING TROUBLE UNDERSTANDING BECAUSE THE LETTERS AREN'T BIG ENOUGH FOR ME

Sen. Amy Klobuchar's husband in the hospital, diagnosed with coronavirus

Damn

we cannot sacrifice the economy just for the sake of a few million human lives

they were going to die anyway, for the most part. probably

C'mon guys you don't REALLY love your grandma

Supposedly Tom Fitton's tweet inspired Trump.

He's reacting to dire prognostication but if Congress actually passes a package he'll probably pivot again as the market will react positively, the converse of how it's acting negatively today because there isn't one.

We joke about it, but that’s likely the direction this is going. Trump is infamously impatient. He’s not going to let this play out according to public health recommendations and cede control to a bunch of people that he’s likely already internally investigations for their connections to the Democratic Party and the clintons

warthog president

Farthog President

Besides, he's in over his head. Not all companies will reopen. Most governors will continue sheltering in place. Concert tours aren't going to resume, many bands that aren't U2 are going to need a while to regroup.

I could see him dangling rescinding federal assistance from those states, but that would be political suicide. But even that wouldn't convince most Governors to reopen. They were taking actions long before that cock declared the emergency.

He can't just issue an Executive Order and go HEY AMERICA'S OPEN

maybe he finally realized that he won't get get to do his rallies

i feel like we're less than a couple weeks away from a press conference where he actually does say "HEY AMERICA'S OPEN!" and then one of the stooges behind him has to actually rebut him and argue on the spot

and then they all take turns stabbing him with knives

...and THEN then the rapture

ok, now i'm starting to piece this together

https://vignette.wikia.nocookie.net/disney/images/e/e6/Profile_-_Pumbaa.jpeg/revision/latest?cb=20190312043302
"HEY AMERICA'S OPEN!"

maybe he finally realized that he won't get get to do his rallies

I wouldn’t be surprised if this is basically it

Oh look the cheese slid off of Hobby Lobby Christian's cracker:

https://i.ibb.co/w4968t6/ETr-Cp0p-Xs-AEM-UH-1.jpg

realistically, does anyone know what would happen to the global economy if everything stays shut for 5, 6, 10 months?

no

No.

yes, but I'm not telling

having got that sorted, could someone tell me what "groom" means in christian-speak?

We all apply to be prayer warriors

xpost

"groom" means in christian-speak?

prepare for molestation

It means get a perm for the Lord

Ffs I was going to say 'it's what a priest does at summer camp' but thought it was over the line

was this posted yet?

My husband has coronavirus. I love him & not being able to be by his side is one of the hardest things about this disease. So many are going through this & much worse. I pray for him & you & meanwhile I will do all I can to get help to the American people.https://t.co/fqQU6tA29r pic.twitter.com/SjyfdQxe1R

— Amy Klobuchar (@amyklobuchar) March 23, 2020

best wishes to them

lol
now that I think about it, xtians already conceive of themselves as sheep, so imagining yourself as a horse in god's stable is akin to a promotion

the trolley problem, updated for 2020

https://i.imgur.com/IH33ay5h.jpg

Zoinks!

Trump is going to come up with the ultimate compromise - we ship our excess patients to another country.

Hang on, now the @GOP likes #deathpanels? I'm so confused. #LarryKudlow #LivesOverMoney #TrumpVirus #VoteBlueToSaveAmerica #FoxNewsIsComplicit pic.twitter.com/QzRpD69pVI

— Susan PhysicallyDistanced Courtney (@sdec) March 23, 2020

If they pass this stimulus to include the administration not being requried to disclose for 6 months who they gave money to...good luck USA.

i don't think schumer is going to allow that, based on how he sounded this morning