Mostly Apolitical Thread for Discussing/Venting our Rational/Irrational COVID-19 Fears and Experiences in 2020

in my office, I found that in the trash many years ago

omg that made me lol
thank you

I'm a firestarter, careful firestarter

In the years after America fell, only scraps of the internet will remain. This thread will be one of them.

People will conclude that Hadrian was our President.

xxp yes this is what I'm afraid of

(you rock that look btw!)

Rightfully so.

xxp

really?!

I can't venture out into the kitchen w/o peals of laughter. But this is my future goddamnit

they say that laughter is the best medicine

I mean this is what i look like rn and my hair is going to only get worse

https://i.ibb.co/nPrSyFN/IMG-20200320-111802.jpg

dude that's hair! you're good

hadrian u maniac

that I thought this was ok because nobody will see me for months and now

lol u guys, thank you for the pickup

I mean....give Old Lunch a lil time to post his mohawk pic

Xpost

I shaved off the beard I've had for almost 13 years but kept the mustache and look ridiculous. I figured I wouldn't see anyone so who cares but forgot about zoom office hours with my students.

i haven't cut my air for about seven months. it'll be okay.

perhaps unsurprisingly that a week and a half of social distancing turns the "how's your COVID spring going" thread into WDYLL

no shade! just getting my lolz where i can

sitcom pitch where a man gives himself a hitler moustache for a laugh, then doesnt realise the camera is on during his webinar on [woke subject matter]

soon it'll be the What do You Smell Like thread

xp insert link about ricky gervais taking that idea straight to series

there are going to be some awful tv episodes and movies set during this time, might as well get in there first

I did rush to flip the cover over my webcam on our Slack call this morning because I was sat in my dressing gown. you'd think I'd be used to this since I've been working from home most of the time since 2016, but I never used to use video until the whole company started working from home this week and they want us to have the video on so we can see each other, so my webcam was permanently covered until yesterday

turned out it was OK because the video calls were on MS Teams, and my video is off on Slack anyway. but phew

soon it'll be the What do You Smell Like thread

― sorry for butt rockin (Neanderthal), Friday, March 20, 2020 9:10 AM (twenty-nine minutes ago)

you don't wanna know

I had a zoom meeting with my boss yesterday and only noticed halfway through that I was wearing a holey undershirt and hadn't shaved in 3 days.

I don't know why the hell Seattle doesn't have a shelter-in-place order, and I am so pissed about it, because at least one of my housemates will continue to do absolutely nothing to protect the rest of us until he's directly ordered to. The mayor was asked about it and said, "Well, we're already telling people to shelter in place, we're just not calling it that." NO YOU'RE NOT! If you were telling people explicitly and clearly and with the force of your authority not to get together with friends, I wouldn't have to have fraught and ultimately pointless arguments with my housemates every other day.

> sitcom pitch where a man gives himself a hitler moustache for a laugh

https://www.amazon.co.uk/Richard-Herring-Hitler-Moustache-DVD/dp/B003IVZRVK

"Has Adolf Hitler ruined that little moustache for everyone? The only time you'll see it these days is carved into the pubic hair of a naughty lady. Is it possible to reclaim the toothbrush moustache (as it should be called) for comedy? After all, Chaplin had it first. In the critically acclaimed "Hitler Moustache," comedian Richard Herring determines to find as well as discovering how people will respond to this contentious face furniture when it's growing out of his face."

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mwEi5Dpq6zs

I've been, what else is new, blogging about South Florida life under these circumstances. These circumstances include Lenten winds and Lillet.

confirmed COVID cases among people we know, or people we know are friends with/related to is at six (or seven, depending on how my wife’s cousin’s tests come back, or eight, depending on whatever knocked out my wife’s friend a few days after she came back from Disney. She’s better now and never got the test).

my job is at severe risk because I cannot do it and meanwhile my fucking roommate is upset because she can't watch grey's anatomy while I am on the phone forever with tech support

🚨 NY STATE LIQUOR STORE ASSOCIATION: LIQUOR STORES DEEMED ESSENTIAL BUSINESS; CAN REMAIN OPEN 🚨 https://t.co/zMJCnJgyvG

— David Mack (@davidmackau) March 20, 2020

I think Illinois just waved (or loosened) the laws that prevented restaurants from delivering alcohol. In the best of circumstances, restaurants make a huge amount of money from alcohol sales, so I think this is one strategy to help keep them afloat.

my fucking roommate is upset because she can't watch grey's anatomy

gah! roommates! anxiety! roommates! computers! anxiety!

just remember to take some slow deep breaths

people can't go into withdrawal right now. That would mess the hospitals up even more.

gah! roommates! anxiety! roommates! computers! anxiety!

this is really trivializing the loss of my entire income

Email from my mom (71):

This morning I made an "emergency" run to the liquor store because I am certain it will be shut very soon. I had all the good healthy stuff at home already.

I did it last night.

I very much doubt booze is going to run out.

not in my house at least.

I only drink in pubs, so I'm looking forward to my longest period of sobriety ... ever. Well, since I started drinking, which wasn't yesterday I can assure you.

Provided I don't die I'll probably be the healthiest I've ever been by the end of this... if there is an end.

trivializing the loss of my entire income

that is indeed serious. plz accept my apology.

My boss just *texted* this to my coworker:
“Rachel
I don't think that you should come to work anymore
You should apply for unemployment immediately
Susan”

Nothing about if this is temporary or permanent. Couldn’t even be bothered to call. Waiting to receive a similar text message.

jfc

holy shit

This is my boss’ version of posts very much in character

"i don't think" what the hell is wrong with people

that is fucked up