Your next 2020 Democratic presidential primary thread: Now we're serious

never having posted cringe

jesus christ stop this usage right here right now

Imagine fending off suggestions that you're somehow morally unfit to run against the living embodiment of human depravity.

I can never run for public office because of the lists on my blog.

So Not Gonna Happen Guy 2032

i would run for office but i am always tripping, 100% of the days
whoooooaaaa

But, yeah, guy with multiple sexual harassment allegations against him should definitely work this angle.xps

sorry for the bad meme phrasing, i will withdraw myself from all future presidential elections

A nothingburger. But so were Benghazi and emails. Repeat a youthful indiscretion often enough and it becomes the truth.

ah yes, hillary’s youthful indiscretions which she committed aged *checks notes* sixtysomething

I mean

https://abcnews.go.com/Politics/virginia-candidate-called-bigfoot-erotica-devotee-wins-congressional/story?id=59045913

Imagine fending off suggestions that you're somehow morally unfit to run against the living embodiment of human depravity.

Nothing short of absolute probity will do. And even then…

"you did WHAT on a white couch??"

― bold caucasian eroticism (Simon H.), Tuesday, February 25, 2020 11:11 AM (fourteen minutes ago)

ex-roommate and her hipster boy toy for 2024 ticket

Beto already lost

re: tim o'brien, this was a _very_ satisfying exchange

Still waiting to hear from the 64 women litigating @MikeBloomberg and his hostile work environment. #ReleaseTheNDAs

— 🌹 Clark Feels The Bern (@Clarknt67) February 24, 2020

Keep pretending that women suing Bloomberg LP - a corporation - is the same thing as suing Mike Bloomberg personally. Because you’d rather smear someone than focus on the facts.

— Tim O'Brien (@TimOBrien) February 24, 2020

if he didn't want people to associate it with him maybe he could've named the corporation something else

— 'Weird Alex' Pareene (@pareene) February 24, 2020

Very, very sophisticated and enlightened take, Alex. Keep going.

— Tim O'Brien (@TimOBrien) February 24, 2020

ok. remember when Mike pretended he wasn't managing his privately held company for years until the EEOC suit after which he said "I am the majority owner, and I’m absolutely entitled to talk to the senior people and am entitled to know what’s going on" https://t.co/4da82YDoav

— 'Weird Alex' Pareene (@pareene) February 24, 2020

"The shift came a day after the women at the center of the lawsuit filed a motion saying the mayor had discussed the allegations and other matters with company officials, despite public statements to the contrary."

— 'Weird Alex' Pareene (@pareene) February 24, 2020

Tim .... I kept going..... Tim where are you

— 'Weird Alex' Pareene (@pareene) February 24, 2020

sorry that was a lot of tweets. i enjoyed it though.

"if he didn't want people to associate it with him maybe he could've named the corporation something else"

lol

Mikey B, LLC

loool that was some good Twitter ethering

Tom Friedman fantasizing about Bernie naming Bloomberg (or vice versa!) secretary of the treasury. https://www.nytimes.com/2020/02/25/opinion/democratic-primary-candidates.html

uh what

I'll pass, thx tho

we need a businessman in charge of the treasury

friedfic

You know who should be in charge of the Treasury, is Martin Skreli

I was wondering what absolute genius would come up with that idea and had it in one guess

enjoy Friedman's idea where he's like.. what if they just appointed a bunch of sitting congress members into all these positions? way to give away the senate, buddy

At this point Tom Friedman is just filling up perfectly good empty space with a stupidity that has to be parked somewhere until he dies.

Sanders cabinet should be exclusively drawn from podcasts

I would argue the "at this point" qualifier

some years ago I went to a department-wide meeting at my corporate employer and they mentioned Friedman by name when referencing something he said in a book, and my first thought was "this guy is not going to be a VP for long if he thinks these are good ideas"

guess what!

he's kind of a dumb person's idea of what a smart person thinks about business, politics, and commerce

he should be freed, man (fired)

I support him keeping his nytimes job because we don't need him on the streets or in a boardroom

tbh I'm now wondering if said VP was responsible for taking a group of chinese nationals on a tour of research labs

flat world theory in effect

I support him keeping his nytimes job because we don't need him on the streets or in a boardroom

Now I'm mad because my brain is trying to complete a "Friedman in the streets / ________ in the sheets" joke

I'm mostly mad because I can't get past "Peedman"

lol

"Speedman" unfortunately not an accepted shorthand for "two pump chump"

hot take that no one on earth has thought of:

coronavirus, given the trump administration's incompetence and demolishment of epidemic preparation operations and budget, has the potential to be trump's Katrina for the 2020 elections.

this is going to be a big fucking mess, regardless of who is in charge. with trump's team calling the shots? it's going to be bad, and they're going to look very, very, very, very, very bad.

(disregard if you're already annoyed by reading about coronavirus, and like rush limbaugh, want to think that it's equivalent to the common cold)

i was gonna say that bernie should make it a big point in the debate given how it's starting to grow into a full blown panic and pharma corps apparently have little incentive to spend on vaccination research

I'm having similar thoughts KM

idk the fact that you might have to pay over $1000 just to get *screened* for this virus which actively disincentives people from getting tested seems like a good point in Bernie's favor

as of yesterday, i think only 3 states (IL + two others i forgot) even have the capability to test for it

Given his administration has no problem rounding up and caging people who *aren't* sick ...

and the official word from the president and his cronies is "everything is fine, buy stocks on the dip"

bernie + democrats should be bashing the living fuck out of this on the campaign trail. talk about trump's dismantling of the very administrative infrastructure that was built to confront a pandemic like this

he did it for no fucking reason, and now he's having to ask congress to authorize funds for a pool of money that shouldn't been taken away in the first place

xpost tbf "go shopping" was W.'s response to 9/11, and that solved everything.

tracer posted this earlier today: recommended reading

https://foreignpolicy.com/2020/01/31/coronavirus-china-trump-united-states-public-health-emergency-response/

The epidemic control efforts unfolding today in China—including placing some 100 million citizens on lockdown, shutting down a national holiday, building enormous quarantine hospitals in days’ time, and ramping up 24-hour manufacturing of medical equipment—are indeed gargantuan. It’s impossible to watch them without wondering, “What would we do? How would my government respond if this virus spread across my country?”

For the United States, the answers are especially worrying because the government has intentionally rendered itself incapable. In 2018, the Trump administration fired the government’s entire pandemic response chain of command, including the White House management infrastructure. In numerous phone calls and emails with key agencies across the U.S. government, the only consistent response I encountered was distressed confusion. If the United States still has a clear chain of command for pandemic response, the White House urgently needs to clarify what it isIf the United States still has a clear chain of command for pandemic response, the White House urgently needs to clarify what it is—not just for the public but for the government itself, which largely finds itself in the dark