Rolling US Economy Into The Shitbin Thread

https://www.marketwatch.com/story/zoom-video-stock-surges-as-coronavirus-fears-deepen-2020-02-24

no, I completely believe you, it's just a lot to handle

maybe we need to cut more taxes?

That bounce was shortlived...

I'm waiting to see a headline that says "Dow falls on stock market worries."

Maybe if Trump taxed the Coronavirus we'd all come out ahead.

https://pbs.twimg.com/media/ERpPll4WkAEu362?format=jpg&name=small

nah the bounce is coming tomorrow i'm sure of it

Man, this is such a classic dumb money story. Buy stocks on the premise that no one will go outside again once the coronavirus spreads.

brb buying stock in food delivery services

brb buying stock in driverless car food delivery services

i figure the wood in my woodpile’s going to at least triple in value due to all the coffins that are going to need building

Shows what you know ditch digging is the new market inefficiency *touches forehead thoughtfully*

https://thumbs.dreamstime.com/z/robot-shovel-8198374.jpg

brb buying stock in food delivery services

― mh, Tuesday, February 25, 2020 5:46 PM (two hours ago) bookmarkflaglink

So what happens when food service workers--who are paid as little as the market will bear and don't even dream of benefits--go to work even though they're coming down with a cold?

the invisible hand will cause them to be driven to work harder for a better job with benefits, while job creators will see their immune systems strengthened by their patriotism

we're back, thank god, I was so worried for number

"One of the more obscure stats to take note of is the S&P 500 closed down more than 2.5% for consecutive sessions while above its 200-day moving average for the first time since 1938."

https://www.marketcrumbs.com/post/stocks-extend-their-decline-as-reality-begins-to-set-in

My biggest financial fear is that the long predicted Trump economic collapse happens now, years after idiot's supporters have decided he could do no wrong and after several incidents more or less affirming that. The ride or die GOP will lead us to our doom.

Isn't that good since it assumes he won't get re-elected

my biggest fear is that my retirement account loses 5-6% over the span of two days due to forces i can't really control or fully understand, and then it bounces up about 1% due to temporary optimism about unknowable forces, and then i have to make a decision about whether to put all the money in bonds until the storm passes, but then lose on the potential bounceback, or keep it all in stocks and lose another 5-10% of my retirement savings

this is so much better than having a pension!!!!!!!!

Karl: do nothing.

Literally don’t even look at it.

generally if you're letting some company manage it, and they have "retirement: target 2045" or whatever types of options, just do that

then do nothing

i have done nothing, and i will continue to do nothing. but goddammit

Vanguard Target Retirement 2055 is my mom

but if the stock market even exists by the time i'm old enough to retire, it will represent a collective failure of the human race. time to rename this planet and move it to the "experiments" folder

ah, retirement... can't wait for that gold watch

thank you for your years of hard work, morbs. here is a rare watch
https://i.imgur.com/ajWHGp4.jpg

beware, it isn't Y2K compatible

lol i carry around one v much like that except the band is gone, so i just keep the nub in my pocket

Morbs that’s the cutest fact about you you’ve ever disclosed

i gave a watch like that to my mom for her birthday when i was little. she gave it back to me for my birthday the following year

my 401k is literally the only asset I have thats more than a couple thousand dollars. future's lookin mighty bright. =|

same

it almost balances out my student loan debt. if the neverending exponential growth on a finite planet can continue for another 20-30 years or so, i might even achieve a positive NET WORTH value! at that point i will no longer be a "worthless" human being

and that's why i'm voting republican straight-ticket until i have worth, to show my committment

We have a good friend whose husband, we just found out, is a Trump supporter, based strictly on the performance of his 401k.

Isn't that good since it assumes he won't get re-elected

I have no idea, but I can easily imagine these morons backing him again *despite* an economic downturn, because "only he can fix it" or whatever bullshit they want to spout. Better dead than red, iirc.

You see, publicly-held companies must constantly wring all the profit out of their assets: not holding property as it's a depreciating liability, skimping on resources for employees to the extent that they're still able to staff essential roles, providing benefits that barely meet industry norms. Projects with long-term returns are shelved because the investors want maximum value right now.

Only 401k plans are offered for retirement, despite the guy who came up with the structure for a modern 401k plan explicitly saying they were meant to supplement pensions. No one offers pensions. Wages are relatively stagnant. So all our hopes are riding on that 401k...

..which is backed mostly by stock in publicly-held companies. So I applaud when my employer refuses to replace a broken office chair, because they're ensuring profit! And my future retirement, where I will use my 401k!

it was also a nice way to permanently make a hundred million people a defender of the late capitalism as the status quo. 100 million people have 401Ks, with more than $5 TRILLION in assets invested.

yeah, i am irritated by the people who talk about their 401ks in relation politics. But at least it's an easy way of categorizing (divorcing) them.

You see, publicly-held companies must constantly wring all the profit out of their assets

saw someone 'wonder aloud' whether bloomberg, by releasing three (of the many) women from their NDAs, had breached his fiduciary duty to bloomberg-the-company's shareholders

heck of a system brownie

I just looked up what the current companies are in the dow index and i would be quite happy to see a lot of those companies spanked.

xp jeeeesus

Low Ratings Fake News MSDNC (Comcast) & @CNN are doing everything possible to make the Caronavirus look as bad as possible, including panicking markets, if possible. Likewise their incompetent Do Nothing Democrat comrades are all talk, no action. USA in great shape! @CDCgov.....

— Donald J. Trump (@realDonaldTrump) February 26, 2020

give mr. trump's team time to message this virus thing and we'll be back in black in no time

He's not very good at being a dictator

he sucks at everything

He's is very good at eating and being an asshole. One of the best, in fact.

who would have seen this coming with the guy who bankrupted atlantic city casinos and the USFL in charge

BREAKING NEWS:

We are now in the worst stock market drop since financial crisis in 2008.

— Christina Ginn (@NBChristinaGinn) February 27, 2020

Now *that* is the kind of fear-mongering I like to see!