Real England

A Greggs customer has caused about £2,000 in damage by ripping apart a counter in order to retrieve a dropped £1 coin. #Christchurch https://t.co/ZbTXCXhlYY

— BBC Dorset (@BBCDorset) January 24, 2020

did he order a vegan sausage roll?

Dorset Police are looking for a man with an Aberdonian accent.

what you wanna do is put a banging Aberdonk on it

https://pbs.twimg.com/media/EPYnxnZXUAEeGrh?format=jpg&name=900x900

free e?

lol!

cursed image

Kylie?

Are “beetles” a separate offering from British music? Is that what we’ll be betting on instead of horses when Brexit stops horses crossing the Irish Sea?

https://img.discogs.com/V3gUEQQNQAUPp23Lx3vIQBMU2oU=/400x400/smart/filters:strip_icc():format(jpeg):mode_rgb():quality(90)/discogs-images/A-1378733-1316619815.jpeg.jpg

white australia is in many ways the realest england

I like the way they obv got the Polish lad who works there to scribble it out

Is that your local calz?

forbiddenbeatles.jpg

Xp
No I cribbed it context free from a not very good twitter thread that had knicked it from somewhere else without crediting where

don't be's second album is siiiiiiiiiick

looking forward to drinking Pravha and listening to Kylie to celebrate this most Brittish of days

Pravha is horrible

that's why we voted to leave the eu

Wasn't Pravha tailor-made for the UK market?

(Joke works both ways, I'm just curious.)

First clue is that it's 4 fucking %. Truly one of the most ignominious aspects of living here.

This is why you drink their spirits, not their beer

I'm not a big fan of spirits, unfortunately. But otm.

Seriously, though, the sheer amount of 3.8%ers on tap at just about every pub makes me want to become a teetotaler.

Drink zoyyyyyyderrrr inztead.

xp or simply start drinking whisk(e)y

Not a fan, sorry. My alcoholic drugs of choice are craft beer, wine and the occasional glass of cognac.

Whenever I check out a new pub here I always ask for their strongest beer on tap, which usually ends up being like 5.5%. I've once been warned by a bartender that it could make for a rough afternoon. Crazy, crazy stuff indeed.

They quietly lowered Stella from 5.2% to 4.7% some years back, they got away with a fucking crime and nobody seemed to care!

A special beer pub is the only way to go, to not get 3 or 4% pish on tap. The number of pubs/hip places w/ ~hip beers~ still seems on the rise though, no?

stella doing their part to reduce domestic violence tbf

The number of pubs/hip places w/ ~hip beers~ still seems on the rise though, no?

I assume so, yes, but Oxford ain't London.

Pravha is indeed tailor-made for the UK, they apparently did some research and found that Czech lager had too "heavy" a taste for mass consumption and that a "light" version would go down better, so they made something that tastes like carling, you can't say we don't get what we deserve.

Harrowing.

for a country with an international reputation for drunkenness, the methods we choose to get there are pretty shameful

"stella doing their part to reduce domestic violence tbf"

I find my ability to dodge flying weaponised plates when pissed is just as impaired when returning home drunk on 4.7% stella tbh!

Trying to remember where I was recently when I heard two men, who were older than me, enthusiastically talking up the merits of drinking Bavaria. Bavaria, I thought, wasn’t that the piss we used to drink cheap with Dutch Gold in university?

Bavaria is pish, yeah. Wouldn't force it on anyone tbpf

Bavaria's 8.6 is the go-to beer for French hobos.

I used to see a group of Polish factory workers who'd just finished a night-shift supping Tyskie at 7am every morning outside the offie. Had 100% respect for them obv

the fuckers have nobbled Tyskie as well. only 5% now instead of 5.5%

and I noticed they've done the same to Old Rosie cider - used to be 7.3%, now 6.8%

It's fucking bullshit man. I didn't know they'd watered down Tiskies as well ffs

Is an overall decrease in alcohol content even correlated with lower alcohol consumption?

a lot of shops round me won't sell any beer or cider over 6.5% so someone thinks it must do

Was surprised to find out that white lightning hasn't been made/sold in over a decade, not anything to be mourned though, frosty jack's was always slightly cheaper and tasted less like sick.

mmm can you still get Diamond White?

seems so

ha! It's organic too!

I was once in a pub with a work colleague and I noticed lots of noise coming from the bar. There was a middle aged woman who'd agreed with the landlord if she downed 10 castaways in a row then she get them for free. She waved at me and said hello there Jason and my friend said you oh so you know her then? Yes i said .. it's my mum!