US Politics, January 2020. Because we hate ourselves.

but i guess josh's larger point is just, what is the point of discussing any of it if it's not going to actually lead to consequences. i guess. i still stubbornly like to pay attention to what crimes are happening and how they happened. that way, as i sit in the smoldering ashes of the post-apocalypse and people are being maddeningly vague about what happened and why, i can be the boss of the trashcan fire

BREAKING NEWS

I JUST GOT IMPEACHED FOR MAKING A PERFECT PHONE CALL!

— Donald J. Trump (@realDonaldTrump) January 16, 2020

ok i lol'd

people around the trashfire are going to be like "...there were bad men...and they told lies...and we paid for those lies..." and i'm going to poke the fire a bit with a stick and then drop the most detailed oral history imaginable over the course of 2 months

xxp the whole decision to impeach was made with the understanding that it probably won't "actually lead to consequences"

KM watch the inteview, it's not deduction—Parnas is making a first person account of Barr's direct involvement

think you might be mixing me up with someone, i didn't say parnas was being deductive. he seems like a scumbag and a half, but so does everyone in trump's orbit. he also has a reason to tell the truth and rat on other people (to lessen his own sentence)

Had anyone in the history of the English language actually used the phrase 'perfect phone call' prior to a few months ago?

Outside of like the manager of a call center?

Melissa from Algona is the lionized swing voter, ie a schizo moron

i propose a new clinical term: "caucusoid"

I heard a werewolf making a phone call at Trader Vic's
the call was perfect

Ha no, Karl: I'm saying *we* don't need to deduce anything, per your "if DOH, then Barr" construction

That there's a guy who was running these errands for Barr saying as much

Lev Parnas is 42 years old holy shit

Whah!?

He must have a fantastic-looking picture in his attic

sorry fake news he is 47

still though

ha I was just about to fact-check

it says he was born 1972. xpost He still looks like he is hitting 60 hard.

Igor Fruman is 15, way more fucked up imo

and Donald Trump is 31!

He looks like a 47 year old from the 1970s or 80s.

LOL, otm. It's like every time a character declares their youthful age in an episode of Twilight Zone or something and I'm all like, yeah okay there Captain AARP.

there was a really good Twitter thread about this

this is nonsense but did people in the past look older when they were younger?

— Brandon McCarthy (@BMcCarthy32) December 27, 2019

and Donald Trump is 31!

― TikTok to the (Alfred, Lord Sotosyn), Thursday, January 16, 2020 4:08 PM (one hour ago) bookmarkflaglink

he's too young to be president. we got him!

Where's the birth certificate?

mid-20th century Americans smoked, drank, made jokes about 'sensitive' topics w/out shitting themselves

yeah we gotta make america that great again

i think they probably shitted themselves some from the drinking

Didn't we discuss this phenomenon recently wrt that pic of the Mary Tyler Moore cast?

brad i got some Milton Berle joeks for ya

kids today tell jokes that would make any mid 20th century american shit themselves fuck this snowflake narrative

Shecky Greene is still alive, let's test yr very dubious theory out on him

imagine showing someone from the 50's a single episode of Rick & Morty or Family Guy. they'd be so triggered lmao

nah comedy is only edgy if it targets a certain race or ethnicity or sexual orientation

/sarcasm

ok then...Family Guy

that twitter thread is insane

Brandon McCarthy is easily a top 10 athlete (retired or not) who tweets. TBF not much competition there.

Thanks 2 Uncle Morbsy for demonstrating that the Greatest Generation still remembers how to deliver those old-timey verbal laxatives.

Lol at mid-century "comedians" being edgy in any way except for racism.

Current profanity alone would curl their toes.

"what's a useless cumbubble?"

when the market for cum was driven to historic, very shortterm, elevated heights by the false expectation that no nut november would meet projected participation levels.

ok lol

John Roberts looked uncharacteristically nervous today in the Senate.

He's trying to calculate just how much humiliation he's willing to endure to provide cover for his friend Trump and the GOP.

Roberts is one of those fuckos dedicated to the GOP more than Trump. I can tell he loathes him because he has no reason to hide it, but he's a Reagan devotee, and this overcomes the loathing.

wondering if he will have any sway in the impeachment trial, I wish he would but am thinking probably not

Rehnquist only issued one ruling during the Clinton impeachment -- in the Democrats' favor! I wonder if Roberts will be so generous without wearing a Gilbert & Sullivan-inspired robe.

https://www.washingtonian.com/wp-content/uploads/2019/09/Rehnquist-robe.jpg

lol

I should point out: man, what a difference in looks and health between the Mad Men generation and Roberts'.