"personally, i would have opened with pawn to king's 4"
― giovanni & ribsy (elmo argonaut), Monday, 22 June 2009 16:32 (sixteen years ago)
"for the last time, i'm not spending my per diem to rent an SUV"
― giovanni & ribsy (elmo argonaut), Monday, 22 June 2009 16:39 (sixteen years ago)
'Idiot Blaine Ruins Gumball 3000'
― Hard House SugBanton (blueski), Monday, 22 June 2009 16:39 (sixteen years ago)
"you wouldn't be hungry if you got something at the drive-thru, mr. i-hate-trans-fats"
― giovanni & ribsy (elmo argonaut), Monday, 22 June 2009 16:49 (sixteen years ago)
I'm trying to think of some combined Odysseus/cop caper gag, but not getting very far. Best I can come up as of yet:
"Are you sure this is the best way to avoid the sirens?"
Not great.
― emil.y, Monday, 22 June 2009 16:54 (sixteen years ago)
"i still say the extortion industry shouldn't have to advertise."
― joe, Monday, 22 June 2009 16:56 (sixteen years ago)
"well, I'm not explaining why we had to drop him off 'somewhere more scenic'"
― giovanni & ribsy (elmo argonaut), Monday, 22 June 2009 16:56 (sixteen years ago)
"No, the drivethrough girl did not seem weird to me."
― goole, Monday, 22 June 2009 16:58 (sixteen years ago)
"if you didn't want jackass 3 on your resume you shouldn't have taken the job."
― 鬼の手 (Edward III), Monday, 22 June 2009 16:58 (sixteen years ago)
ugh who knew being drily urbane was so challenging
― giovanni & ribsy (elmo argonaut), Monday, 22 June 2009 17:00 (sixteen years ago)
a variation on elmo's:
"don't tell me you forgot your drink on the roof again"
― 鬼の手 (Edward III), Monday, 22 June 2009 17:01 (sixteen years ago)
short sweet and stupid is most likely on this one."I thought he was with you!""Well it's not like he WALKED away..."
― probably gets busy with larper chicks or somefin' (forksclovetofu), Monday, 22 June 2009 17:01 (sixteen years ago)
"Nothing back there but a coffee cup, boss."
― Eazy, Monday, 22 June 2009 17:02 (sixteen years ago)
"what are those idiots beeping at?"
― 鬼の手 (Edward III), Monday, 22 June 2009 17:03 (sixteen years ago)
That's the cruelest depiction of distress I've seen in a NYer cartoon maybe ever. Look at that dude's eyes.
also"That's the cruelest depiction of distress I've seen in a NYer cartoon maybe ever. Look at that dude's eyes"
― Philip Nunez, Monday, 22 June 2009 17:04 (sixteen years ago)
"thanks for stopping, a slurpee always brings out the kid in me"
― 鬼の手 (Edward III), Monday, 22 June 2009 17:09 (sixteen years ago)
"look, paul, I'm trying to be supportive here but there are better ways of getting on reality TV"
― 鬼の手 (Edward III), Monday, 22 June 2009 17:10 (sixteen years ago)
"Thank god THAT'S taken care of."
― probably gets busy with larper chicks or somefin' (forksclovetofu), Monday, 22 June 2009 17:11 (sixteen years ago)
haha I was going to do a "Jackass" one but chickened out
― get money fuck witches (HI DERE), Monday, 22 June 2009 17:11 (sixteen years ago)
"It's like, he's going in the drink, but this drink is going in me. Makes you think, you know?"
― goole, Monday, 22 June 2009 17:14 (sixteen years ago)
"Are you or have you ever been a representative or member of a terrorist organization or a member of a group which endorses terrorist activity?"
― special guest appearance (Roberto Spiralli), Monday, 22 June 2009 17:20 (sixteen years ago)
"these car rental people don't know the meaning of the word 'legroom' do they?"
― 鬼の手 (Edward III), Monday, 22 June 2009 17:24 (sixteen years ago)
"these harsh interrogation techniques are torture on your highway milage"
― giovanni & ribsy (elmo argonaut), Monday, 22 June 2009 17:25 (sixteen years ago)
"I'm not exactly sure how they took the news but they said they'd give us 'a sign'"
― special guest appearance (Roberto Spiralli), Monday, 22 June 2009 17:27 (sixteen years ago)
"maybe it's in my other pants"
― special guest appearance (Roberto Spiralli), Monday, 22 June 2009 17:28 (sixteen years ago)
"I've always hated Rush Week."
― get money fuck witches (HI DERE), Monday, 22 June 2009 17:29 (sixteen years ago)
"back in my day, we didn't have to travel to a sustainable fishery"
― giovanni & ribsy (elmo argonaut), Monday, 22 June 2009 17:29 (sixteen years ago)
lotsa mileage in the torture angle npi
― 鬼の手 (Edward III), Monday, 22 June 2009 17:30 (sixteen years ago)
"Don't get me wrong, I love these family reunions - I just wish Mitt wouldn't act like he's better than the rest of us."
― iatee, Monday, 22 June 2009 17:30 (sixteen years ago)
"I dunno...did you leave the gas on maybe?"
― special guest appearance (Roberto Spiralli), Monday, 22 June 2009 17:31 (sixteen years ago)
"Hey Mario, you know what I hate? When the picture for a caption competition is fucking lame. Also - Jews."
― special guest appearance (Roberto Spiralli), Monday, 22 June 2009 17:32 (sixteen years ago)
"I spy with my little eye something that rhymes with 'shoe left the hostage on the roof, idiot'."
― get money fuck witches (HI DERE), Monday, 22 June 2009 17:33 (sixteen years ago)
"Porco Dio! Che disgraziata!"
― Philip Nunez, Monday, 22 June 2009 17:36 (sixteen years ago)
"after the administration banned waterboarding we weren't left with many options"
― 鬼の手 (Edward III), Monday, 22 June 2009 17:36 (sixteen years ago)
Thinking of some "give a man a fish and he'll eat for a day" gag but I can't place it
― giovanni & ribsy (elmo argonaut), Monday, 22 June 2009 17:37 (sixteen years ago)
"i think it qualifies as a 'stress position,' yes"
― giovanni & ribsy (elmo argonaut), Monday, 22 June 2009 17:39 (sixteen years ago)
"You wanna know where he is? Hit the brakes and I'll tell you..."
― Philip Nunez, Monday, 22 June 2009 17:40 (sixteen years ago)
"I got the idea from Mitt Romney"
― nabisco, Monday, 22 June 2009 17:40 (sixteen years ago)
(Alternately: "Hey, if it was good enough for Mitt Romney's dog...")
― nabisco, Monday, 22 June 2009 17:41 (sixteen years ago)
"I'm not sure if this is what the boss meant by 'thinking outside the box'"
― 鬼の手 (Edward III), Monday, 22 June 2009 17:44 (sixteen years ago)
hahahaaaaaaaaaaaaa I had forgotten about Mittens and his dog adventures
― get money fuck witches (HI DERE), Monday, 22 June 2009 17:44 (sixteen years ago)
"Now we just look for an overpass" would also work
― nabisco, Monday, 22 June 2009 17:47 (sixteen years ago)
"Look Tony, it's not that I don't like it, but I live in a 3rd floor studio - where am I going to put it?"
― special guest appearance (Roberto Spiralli), Monday, 22 June 2009 17:47 (sixteen years ago)
"This was a lot easier before they transferred us to Utah"
― nabisco, Monday, 22 June 2009 17:49 (sixteen years ago)
^^ wait, substitute a dry state that does not have a gigantic well-known lake
Arizona
― get money fuck witches (HI DERE), Monday, 22 June 2009 17:49 (sixteen years ago)
lake havasu, bro
― goole, Monday, 22 June 2009 17:50 (sixteen years ago)
why did i even post that
― goole, Monday, 22 June 2009 17:51 (sixteen years ago)
"I'm all for offering them a final meal, but next time NO BURRITOS"
― nabisco, Monday, 22 June 2009 17:53 (sixteen years ago)
"So much for 'what happens in Vegas stays in Vegas'."
― get money fuck witches (HI DERE), Monday, 22 June 2009 17:53 (sixteen years ago)