star wars 9 spoilers and postmortem shit talk

"felt more sibling-ish to me"

https://allthatsinteresting.com/wordpress/wp-content/uploads/2018/05/tut-and-wife-ii.jpg

I definitely think we were meant to at least see Kylo as desirous of Rey if not the other way around. kinda tough to imagine that he thought they should "rule together" or whatever but just as pals

those tweets of oscar isaac being unable to fake his way through press junket stuff are seriously bringing me more joy than basically anything in the film

serious GOT s8 red carpet vibes

lol mark s

I would love to drink a scotch with Oscar Isaac.

opening the movie with "no nevermind, the big villain is actually PALPATINE" was so deflating for me that it was like an hour before i could get even residual thrills out of watching this great cast hang out together doing space stuff.

Completely, painfully otm

I was angry at the movie as soon as I read the first sentence of the crawl

the dead speak

i know i'm biased but:

the taxation of trade routes to outlying star systems being in dispute >>>> the dead speaking

have you heard the news? the dead walk....

I gave Lucas shit twenty years ago for premising a galactic war on trade routes, but maybe he knows more history than Pete Buttigieg.

I think I may have gaslighted myself into thinking that we heard Palpy's voice at the end of TLJ. Genuinely unsure whether that happened or not.

i'm kind of interested to scan this tbh

this leaked description of what The Rise of Skywalker looked like back in October paints a hysterical picture of how wild the final 2 months of post were on this thing. so much changed at the very last seconds. https://t.co/xL8p18gGgH

— esther rosenfield 📹 (@EstherOnFilm) December 30, 2019

It was palpable.

i will make an exception to my earlier statement to say i found isaac's red carpet interview in that twitter thread is a little eyeroll-y. bugs me when ppl make a big show out of red carpet interviews being dumb, like yeah no shit sherlock, the fake journalists dont give a shit about it either, just say something normal so the lady and crew can get their footage and go home.

No!

Speaking as someone who can be relied upon to both steadfastly do the thing I'm paid to do and unceasingly grouse about how mindmeltingly bogus all of the ancillary trappings of work are, I am firmly in Oscar's corner.

So... this was bad?

Nah.

In fact, my capsule review would probably be something like 'not too bad!'. With an exclamation mark and everything.

How much more badness would be required for it to be too bad

It would probably take at least one character accidentally stepping in feces or perhaps an Elan Sleazebaggano cameo to push this into 'aw...too bad' territory.

re: that doc about reshoots Simon H. posted, there's been a lot of talk about that in The Discourse(TM), combined with the fact that Abrams and Terrio did not really consult with the LFL Story Group while writing or shooting, which led to a lot of the "wait, but" moments discussed throughout this thread. (And also explains in part why Pablo Hidalgo took his Twitter private right around the time this leaked, because he knew what was about to happen.)

Palps: I am...
Snoke: every voice you...
Binks: have ever heard!

very much here for Oscar Isaac channeling Robert Pattinson's post-Twilight energy

gonna have to mute the TROS and Star Wars tags on Twitter soon - I thought this movie was fun in places but Abrams and Terrio continuing to explain their stupid storytelling decisions is making me hate it now.

xpost Omigod, I might have actually loved this movie if next to the tank of Snokes there had been a tank of Jar-Jars.

if you think Oscar Isaac DGAF wait until you meet John Boyega

Star Wars romance 😗👀🙂 pic.twitter.com/ngB6XEMMS2

— John Boyega (@JohnBoyega) December 31, 2019

I think I may have gaslighted myself into thinking that we heard Palpy's voice at the end of TLJ. Genuinely unsure whether that happened or not.

unless you mean at the end of the credits, then you didn't hear El Tino's voice imo

although tbf I haven't heard it in over 30 years so I probably wouldnt notice

xxp he has had enough of Reylos and I for one am here for it

directing the ire of the toxic portion of the fandom at them just because you said something dumb on Instagram is nagl

allowing that i was against the emperor's presence in the movie from the opening seconds, i also think he looked and sounded terrible... mcdiarmid gave the guy a really memorable evil-wizard energy in Jedi and a shakespeare-adjacent insidiousness in Sith, but here he feels generically evil... like his lair, his plan, his speech and his performance could all have been in the climax of some generic star wars ripoff movie, RPG, or would-be franchise-starter. there's just no gas in that tank.

and then his plan makes no sense and changes repeatedly (as others have observed), and almost as an afterthought he has this unbelievable deus ex machina of an unprecedentedly huge armada conjured up out of nowhere and staffed by... who again? and all this is the filmmakers' main idea for both the movie's plot spine and its claims to being a "conclusion to the nine-film epic saga"! like, okay, if you don't like TLJ you can steer in a different direction but hitting a complete reset button on the plot and still getting *this* level of jotted-down late-night brainstorm session notes is pathetic imo. these movies cost hundreds of millions of dollars - they can't take an extra week or two at the beginning to hammer out the story some more?

Boyega clowning on semi-toxic doofi in his replies is more sweet than vicious imo

Idk, if I were John Boyega and I’d been subject to vicious racist abuse because Reylos lost their shit over the idea Finn would get together with Rey, I don’t think I’d give too many fucks at this stage. Wasn’t this why Daisy deleted her Instagram?

Just seen this. I'm not the world's hugest SW fan but I do have considerable emotional investment in the series - ANH is legit one of my favourite films, TFA despite the lame plot retread gave me *all* the feels, loved where TLJ took the story, R1 is my #1 comfort movie right now - basically all of them (prequels excepted) have at least some worthwhile emotional or dramatic or visual moments - even the trailers are usually enough to put a little lump in my throat. I even enjoyed Solo. And this? For 99% of this I felt N O T H I N G. And the 1% did not redeem it in any way. Maybe it's me - or maybe it was confused overlong hackneyed artless uninspired fanservice, and I'm a fan who doesn't feel in need of servicing.

iow the review in the 7th post otm.

One more thing... as usual with films these days I missed a few key lines, what did Rey say to Ren after the sea battle? "I wanted to take your hand... in the sand" is what I heard!

"Ben's hand"

"Remember (Walking in Ben's Hand)"

Lol

ledge otm

re: the Boyega thing upthread, a few people pointed out that the @crogmen user who started the firestorm (by posting that "as a black woman im fucking ashamed that someone like you represented us in star wars") was using another Twitter user's picture as her own, linking back to the other person's profile pics as proof. @crogmen deleted their account later. some were accusing her of Dolezaling on Twitter to troll people. the evidence doesn't really prove that she was a white person pretending to be Black, only that she stole someone else's picture and used it for her profile pic. but then again, based on Google browser data, all she posted on Twitter prior to that was whiny shit about how Ben Solo was treated badly in the new film.

I stopped reading when I realized I was being pathetic for caring about twitbeef.

I didn't pay much attention to it but that whole thing felt like the nightmare end-point of online performative wokeness: a whole bunch of sad people arguing over who gets to be the most sexist/racist/homophobic depending on which Star Wars ship they supported.

Agree with 100% with Jenny Nicholsons review of this.. in fact it was quite cathartic to have it all spelt out for 65 mins.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GErIPKjwuDg

I make a lot of poor decisions on a daily basis, but I can't say that a 65-minute fixed-shot video of someone talking about Star Wars to camera is going to be one of them - does no-one write rambling Medium articles anymore?

I have a very dull task to do at work today, so I've gone in. I agree with her. But yeah, could be shorter...

JJ Abrams is not a good director or characters or plot. All he can do is visuals and vague superficial 'feel'.

He's good at TV pilots. He shoulda stuck to those.

He seems like someone who's constitutionally incapable of ever pushing past 'good'.