Rolling Maleness and Masculinity Discussion Thread

(which was in the Commonwealth but I have also spent a lot of time in the US without hearing of this association)

my lesbian daughter has never heard of rugby as a lesbian sport but we live in France where rugby is probably the second biggest sport (unless pétanque counts)

I always thought softball was lesbians' sport of choice.

ok boomer

lesbians' sport of choice is any sport they enjoy playing or watching others play

Lacrosse was the sport of choice amongst lesbians in my day.

Jai Alai is the official sport of genderqueer

we need to dig deeper into this, for example, what is the lesbian board game of choice?

Sorry. Oh wait, that's Canadians.

Canadians were the sport of choice amongst lesbians in your day?

I've got the scars to prove it

i have to be honest that i have a deep aversion to guys using the word "dude"
it like revolts me
i can't pinpoint exactly what it is.......

:-(

omg i'm sorry! i mean, i'm trying to work on it

also who cares what i think really

It's okay, du- um... bud?

hehehehe i like bud!

the gas station parking lot was a complete mess last week so I ended up pulling up next to the air pump, and sure enough, someone pulled up as soon as I got out of my car needing to use it. "dude, are you using that air compressor?" "nah man, I'll move!"

hadn't been called dude in the wild for some time

really! i feel like it happens all the time
did you like it?

I get "hey man" a lot more than "dude" and it was somewhat refreshing

For some reason I was thinking about my late grandfather this morning and how I grew up admiring him as a "tough guy who had a sensitive side" and thinking about how (according to his own self description) had been sensitive when he was young but had to be tough because of circumstances (growing up in a poor neighborhood, fighting in the pacific theater etc.). But then it hit me, aren't all boys born sensitive? There's no such thing as a tough baby.

― longtime caller, first time listener (man alive)

you have clearly not been watching enough animal planet

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DsVk7MNNAeQ

"hehehehe i like bud!

― surm"

everybody likes bud these days, even people who don't live in oregon

i've been called "boss" a few times but it's always when someone is trying to upsell me on an air filter at an oil change place.

like, half the farmers/fishermen i know write poetry, and most of the honours class lads still go home to play in the parish cups

― Banáná hÉireann (darraghmac)

i think there's something in that, tho of course the Irish acceptance and appreciation of poetry is hardly a universal

― a very powerful woman in the dog world (Noodle Vague)

ahem

www.fisherpoets.org

I hate "boss".

Jai Alai is the official sport of genderqueer

― longtime caller, first time listener (man alive)

is _that_ why it's banned in the phillipines, i thought it was the rampant match fixing

I get "hey man" a lot more than "dude" and it was somewhat refreshing

― mh

you can have the best of both worlds

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9AaiQVAG0gQ

I hate "boss".

Likewise, and "chief" is even worse (I get that now and then).

My tortured joke above was for the "favorite board game" question. "Sorry" is a game (may be only cards, no board) and the joke was that Canadians say "sorry" a lot (and they pronounce it "soary").

i get 'boss' at the bodega; it's not great, but whatever

Lol, nickn. I had assumed your joke was "oh wait, lacrosse is the official sport of CANADIANS, not lesbians" since iirc lacrosse IS the official national sport of Canada.

Likewise, and "chief" is even worse (I get that now and then).

― nickn

sorry about that

(nb i am not canadian)

I saw a film noir about a jai alai player who got murdered by one of his many mistresses, after he got her pregnant, then left to go pro in Cuba. He did not seem genderqueer.

when I worked in a caff we used to call the boss "chief" just to wind him up. "Squire" is even better for insincere displays of respect.

Can't beat 'big yin', ask Bobby Gillespie.

was watching a doc about Clarence Adams (black US soldier who defected to China after becoming a POW during Korean war) and he said how initially he was spoken to quite cordially (and often addressed in some Chinese word for comrade or something) in his first period in China, but then in the early days of the Cultural Revolution he noticed people started calling him "mister". And he said something like when you become a "mister" that means you are less than a human being and are in grave danger + you need to get yr ass out of there fast!

I chuckle to myself when Asian taxi drivers call me "boss".

guessing they called him "shifu" which is just used for taxi drivers and repairmen ime. if someone isn't referring to you as some sort of long-lost family member then it does sound like they are distancing themself from you.

my mom still calls some people 'cheap charlie'.

Seamus Heaney was given a minute's silence before the All Ireland Final at Croke Park in 2013; can't think of many other countries where the equivalent would happen.

Not maleness/masculinity content but

As a PSA, I don't find it particularly informative or insightful

I mean have you seen one ever that like ~blows your mind~?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BtulL3oArQw&feature=emb_logo

I don't think that worked: https://youtu.be/BtulL3oArQw

nicely written piece linked to by cory doctorow on twitter. i don't personally identify with a lot of it but thought it was insightful:

https://hedgehogreview.com/issues/identitieswhat-are-they-good-for/articles/what-is-it-like-to-be-a-man

the original twitter thread for reference

Patriarchy's dirty secret is that it sucks for men, too. There's been an ocean of ink spilled over "toxic masculinity" but until I read @phil_christman's "What It's Like to Be a Man" in the @hedgehogreview, I couldn't crisply define it.https://t.co/EMmjV4AUWw

1/ pic.twitter.com/s3xSKEOwsN

— Cory Doctorow #BLM (@doctorow) July 12, 2020

that's a really good piece, indeed

I inexplicably think I should know how to install drywall, among many other things, and have the Hank Hill-esque insecure feeling when someone is working on my house. Luckily, I do not feel the need to hover over the furnace guy so I can say things like “oh, using a socket wrench there, huh?”

It’s junk

220, 221, whatever it takes

xp - don't you have an older house that is plaster & lath? ... installing drywall, while a useful skill (i def need to brush up on it), in some cases is less relevant depending on the age and construction of a given building or buildings in a region ... and that is my butch nerd insight of the day.

I've found that the best way to justify not being a DIY handyman-type is to own no more than a few basic hand tools, so I never have all the tools I need to do anything more complicated than, say, hanging a picture or fixing a leaky faucet.

Who purchases a Riverside Chaucer and a copy of the Go-Betweens’ 16 Lovers Lane before he gets around to pillows?

pictures of people who seem to have figured out how to live

I inexplicably think I should know how to install drywall, among many other things, and have the Hank Hill-esque insecure feeling when someone is working on my house.

― solo scampito (mh)

for the true male experience, bob dylan gives some tips on hanging drywall in the first episode of the second season of "theme time radio hour"

Don't think I even know what drywall is. it might be a us/uk difference thing though. I am extremely incompetent at most manual work.

Aka plasterboard.