Barfly Best Practices

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An experienced server (one that’s probably worth your time) will tip cash face down. When you collect your change, leave the bills for the tip face up.

June Pointer’s Valentine’s Day Secret Admirer Note Author (calstars), Saturday, 23 November 2019 00:35 (six years ago)

what is this nonsense

-_- (jim in vancouver), Saturday, 23 November 2019 00:45 (six years ago)

servers must fucking hate you

-_- (jim in vancouver), Saturday, 23 November 2019 00:45 (six years ago)

barfly best practice: run a tab, pay once, when you leave, tip 20-25%. fin.

-_- (jim in vancouver), Saturday, 23 November 2019 00:46 (six years ago)

does the alcohol go in the mouth or can it be drank another way

Jordan Pickford LOLverdrive (Neanderthal), Saturday, 23 November 2019 01:09 (six years ago)

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_GCcoaSq3x4

brownie, Saturday, 23 November 2019 02:43 (six years ago)

I don't get this leaving cash out on the bar.

Yeah, if it's a tip, but keep it in your pocket otherwise.

pplains, Saturday, 23 November 2019 03:11 (six years ago)

one month passes...

Keep in mind — from a bartender’s perspective, there’s nothing more useless than a patron commenting on the music.

calstars, Friday, 3 January 2020 22:04 (six years ago)

ugh, nice newer bar and this group came in and they all are sitting, not waiting in a line. and two are doing the “holding cash up to get service” move. ok, it’s a small space and they are servicing _your group_ from left to right. you are the only people this guy is serving. and the guy near me has money in hand and singles on the bar in front of him, in some passive aggressive “this is the tip” move. and when he is about to be served, he puts those singles back in his wallet

diiiiiiieeee

babu frik fan account (mh), Saturday, 4 January 2020 06:35 (six years ago)

If the tables are wobbly, place your drink in the middle

calstars, Saturday, 11 January 2020 01:50 (six years ago)

If the drinks are wobbly, place your

papa stank (Neanderthal), Saturday, 11 January 2020 02:01 (six years ago)

four weeks pass...

came here to post the same video as brownie upthread

doorstep jetski (dog latin), Monday, 10 February 2020 10:56 (six years ago)

six months pass...

When paying with a card at a new place, provide the most exclusive plastic (or metal) that you can. This may lead to better service and customer prioritization in anticipation of a large tip.

calstars, Tuesday, 18 August 2020 23:12 (five years ago)

rich people are bad tippers so this probably won't work

Temporary Erogenous Zone (jim in vancouver), Tuesday, 18 August 2020 23:14 (five years ago)

my wife got a 10% tip from one of the countries wealthiest real estate developers/art patrons

Temporary Erogenous Zone (jim in vancouver), Tuesday, 18 August 2020 23:15 (five years ago)

lol yeah

solo scampito (mh), Tuesday, 18 August 2020 23:47 (five years ago)

this thread makes going to the bar seem like going to the soup nazi

brimstead, Tuesday, 18 August 2020 23:51 (five years ago)

“When in groups of 5 or multiples of 7, make sure to all sit on the same side on the booth and throw 8 five dollars bills folded into airplanes towards the bartender every 24 1/2 minutes”

brimstead, Tuesday, 18 August 2020 23:53 (five years ago)

also know the code name for your drink. calling it by its real name is an insult

muntjac wagner (Neanderthal), Tuesday, 18 August 2020 23:54 (five years ago)

Bwahaha

Temporary Erogenous Zone (jim in vancouver), Tuesday, 18 August 2020 23:56 (five years ago)

Assuming the bartender is busy, lower your cost per hour at the bar by bringing a thermos or flask from home

calstars, Monday, 24 August 2020 21:56 (five years ago)

PROTIP: Don't go to a bar during COVID

Fuck the NRA (ulysses), Monday, 24 August 2020 22:43 (five years ago)

one month passes...

Sometimes a big tip is necessary to alert a new or unfamiliar bartender that you’re “worthy” of buybacks. So if there’s someone new behind the bar, be generous and look forward to the next time for reciprocation.

calstars, Sunday, 27 September 2020 22:00 (five years ago)

one month passes...

Just stand in one place and drink until you fall over

calstars, Sunday, 1 November 2020 23:42 (five years ago)

three months pass...

If it’s busy, and you score a good spot or table: to deter squatters, order doubles, and have a spare drink on the table at all times

calstars, Sunday, 14 February 2021 18:35 (five years ago)

how is that not a dick move

brimstead, Sunday, 14 February 2021 19:58 (five years ago)

If it’s crowded, place your half empty drink in clear view of the bartender so that it’s clearly visible when they make their rounds. This allows them to quickly assess, together with a nod on your part, that you’re in need of another round.

calstars, Saturday, 27 February 2021 01:49 (five years ago)

half empty? we only drink half?

brimstead, Saturday, 27 February 2021 02:40 (five years ago)

Drinking half is a dick move

calstars, Saturday, 27 February 2021 02:42 (five years ago)

Tip directly into the recipients hand / vision

You all stealin what’s not yours can gfy

calstars, Monday, 1 March 2021 00:28 (five years ago)

two months pass...

When arriving at the bar and verbally greeting the bouncer or bartender, volume is more important than content

calstars, Saturday, 1 May 2021 21:44 (five years ago)

strolls into doorway, screams "FUCK UP CUNT!!!" across the room, returns to outdoor seating and waits for preferred beverages to be fetched.

bobo honkin' slobo babe (sic), Saturday, 1 May 2021 21:51 (five years ago)

When paying cash and breaking a large bill, if you have enough for a tip in small bills, give that to the bartender when he gives you your change. This precludes the never-graceful “let me give you a tip from the change” interaction

calstars, Sunday, 2 May 2021 17:56 (five years ago)

one month passes...

Don’t creep or hit on the staff

calstars, Saturday, 5 June 2021 20:25 (five years ago)

one month passes...

If you’re sitting outside and it’s windy and seats at the place are at a premium and you’re not finished with your round and you have a glass of water and a clean napkin at hand and you need to vacate your spot temporarily, dip a corner of the napkin into the water and drape it over the round, wet edge touching rim and facing the prevailing direction of the wind. This will decrease the chances your napkin will blow away while you’re elsewhere, thereby decreasing the chances a customer looking for a seat will assume yours is available vis a vis the “abandoned” round.

calstars, Saturday, 24 July 2021 22:14 (four years ago)

If you need to limit yourself, order the last round, provide your card, and ask the server to close you out

calstars, Saturday, 31 July 2021 23:44 (four years ago)

two months pass...

Most graceful way to close out?
My vote goes to asking for a glass of water or club when you do so to savor the moment a bit longer

calstars, Wednesday, 13 October 2021 00:49 (four years ago)

four months pass...

Some bartenders will sooner give you a buyback if you pay with a card rather than cash; you will have to determine this via experience

calstars, Friday, 18 February 2022 01:53 (four years ago)

three months pass...

Always have more cash on hand than necessary

calstars, Monday, 30 May 2022 20:47 (four years ago)

When paying cash and breaking a large bill, if you have enough for a tip in small bills, give that to the bartender when he gives you your change. This precludes the never-graceful “let me give you a tip from the change” interaction

Or you can do the “letting the server know how much change you want” thing, saving the server from having to try to judge how many and what denomination of smaller bills to dole out to you for max tippage. e.g. the bill is $28 and you have a $50, you pay with the $50 and say “$15 back is fine, thanks.”

war mice (hardcore dilettante), Monday, 30 May 2022 22:12 (four years ago)

Fair

calstars, Monday, 30 May 2022 22:34 (four years ago)

as a server for the time being, i completely agree -- just tell me how much you want back and i will bring it. don't make me do math!!

Piggy Lepton (La Lechera), Monday, 30 May 2022 23:47 (four years ago)

then again, if i am the most sober person (usually) and you cannot be trusted to do math bc u been drinking, i will do it

Piggy Lepton (La Lechera), Monday, 30 May 2022 23:48 (four years ago)

A safe assumption

calstars, Tuesday, 31 May 2022 00:10 (four years ago)

one month passes...

Stack your cash tips in single file if the service doesn’t pick up after each round. A mess of singles could give the wrong impression.

calstars, Sunday, 3 July 2022 00:35 (three years ago)

two months pass...

Each time you visit a regular spot, alternate between paying cash and with a card. Eventually you will be able to earn a free drink — either via the bartender assuming you’re paying with a card, or via plausible deniability that you forgot which payment method you’re using.

calstars, Sunday, 11 September 2022 17:51 (three years ago)

If a bartender in a plausible but uncommon spot recognizes you (“how’ve you been?”) but you don’t recognize them, confess the truth

calstars, Saturday, 24 September 2022 01:33 (three years ago)

two months pass...

Casual mention of other bartenders at the same place may get you you buybacks earlier

calstars, Saturday, 3 December 2022 02:09 (three years ago)

four months pass...

If you’re looking for a buyback, delay payment on your deserving round (4th is best). Have the bartender serve you and if necessary, feign to fumble about for your wallet. This pause allows your server the appropriate time to reflect

calstars, Wednesday, 5 April 2023 01:04 (three years ago)

two months pass...

On a hot day, the glass holding your cold beverage may be subject to condensation. Don’t forsake a coaster or a napkin in this scenario. You want that water soaked up during drink downtime — so that it doesn’t drip on your shirt so much when you sip

calstars, Saturday, 24 June 2023 19:17 (two years ago)


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