Ne'er get thee stitched til Booris be ditched: UK General Election 2019

<3 georgey boy

my excuse for still getting the paper Graun for years after I hated it used to be my kakuro addiction.

my mum says she only gets the telegraph for the piece of piss crossword so it’s confusing where the goosestepoing has come from.

GOOSEPOSTING.

Today is #CarersRightsDay. Labour will boost #carersallowance in line with job seekers allowance and introduce a proper national carers’ strategy. We must care for them as they care for us.

— Jeremy Corbyn (@jeremycorbyn) November 21, 2019

(xxp) Curious but apt hybrid of goosestepping and Gestapo there?

Carers Allowance needs boosting. I get £60 a bastard week for caring for two disableds. how am i supposed get shitfaced every night on that?:p

the labour manifesto is so clearly good, and delivered in good faith about achievability and costing, and the tory pork barrel bullshit giveaway politics is so transparent it is astonishing labour aren’t racing ahead in the polls. but this election will give us the government we deserve. i am drunk.

please make sure you have your keys before you order a chinese

I read the Standard on Wednesdays for the property section (it’s awful and I am aware of that) and ES Magazine to keep on top of those weird fashion party pix that look like a pile-up of eating-disordered dolls. The restaurant critic’s a bit shit rn, but until she self-suspended, the mag editor followed me on Twitter (she used to work at Vogue) so it’s something I pick up to leaf through if I go to the shops by Holborn tube (I don’t usually grab the paper itself).

A few months ago, at a friend’s book launch, I met Lynn Barber and discovered that she is quite good friends with Tracey Emin and had to explain with some delicacy that I no longer get on with that weird Tory numpty. But LB was fairly personable herself.

please make sure you have your keys before you order a chinese

the embarrassing admission is that it turns out i did actually have my keys. also i haven’t returned the next door neighbours weird fork yet.

vote labour.

keys communism.

Toynbee got excited by the 2017 manifesto as well IIRC.

Rebecca Long-Bailey's speech beforehand couched everything in the context of the Green Industrial Revolution which I think was a smart move - it should appeal to two very different voter groups at once.

melt communism.

Oh interesting, I just got a notif from twitter saying “we have received your 235 reports in the last month”. Maybe there’s been a backlog of reporting hence all the good accounts being banned?

the embarrassing admission is that it turns out i did actually have my keys. also i haven’t returned the next door neighbours weird fork yet.

ikr

I didn't know Emin was a tory. Shit artist anyway, no loss.

emin once in a pleasant summer’s evening while i was enjoying an excellent pint of adnams, came round the corner in a wheelchair and simultaneously a fly landed in my pint, an event (a ruinous fly or wasp in the pint) which i have always subsequently referred to as “an Emin”.

she supported blair then cameron, then she was anti-Brexit, fuck knows what her position is now, probably not something very well-thought-through at a guess

xp
Jasper Emin

Jamelia on C4 news serving Jez realness to some odd Tory boy who looks like a shit impersonator of Michel Sheen in Good Omens.

Yeh I saw that and was thinking "If there's one thing Labour is known for right now it's having plenty of young supporters" and they found three earnest young people against the manifesto and...Jamelia.

Wait, Jamelia is a Tory?

Labour promises to add the Cricket World Cup on list of events on free-to-air TV.

— Mark Di Stefano 🤙🏻 (@MarkDiStef) November 21, 2019

“Both of these men, who are fine politicians and essentially good people, will be remembered in history for doing the most terrible things to our political system and I don’t understand why they fell for it; I don’t understand why they did it.”

these YBAs really were a deep thinking set of people, no wonder Dave Stewart was so impressed with them.

no she was the only one at all pro the manifesto, just seemed an odd choice.

Can’t believe the news finds it so easy to get young Tories on air any night of the week

(xp) No, there was a Labour ex-policy wonk there too.

nicola sturgeon just interviewed by johnnie beattie on BBC scotland - she clearly hates him

john beattie

tom hamilton is hardly leadership-aligned

T0m Ham1lt0n...the thing that sticks in my mind about that guy is I remember when he had a baby and he spent tons of time on Twitter around and after the baby’s birth going on and on about Labour/Corbyn. Just...one of those people that is talked up as being normal or sensible but I couldn’t get over that.

want a window poster, so far Labour have sent me a load of fucking (capitalist roader) raffle tickets

(xp) Haven't a fucking clue what he or anyone else is like on Twitter, he didn't sound too critical of the manifesto to me tbh.

the Labour member in this household received an “election pack” but judging by the size I don’t think there’s a poster. ask Paula for one!

nicola sturgeon just interviewed by johnnie beattie on BBC scotland - she clearly hates him

https://img.discogs.com/8ElSMHJE6m5m96D0r9h2bQtuTsY=/fit-in/600x588/filters:strip_icc():format(jpeg):mode_rgb():quality(90)/discogs-images/R-12117056-1528647339-3580.jpeg.jpg

... Alex Salmond not on there, I see.

Ok, I’m laughing (check the @ and icon of the second one)

Corbynite omissions from Labour Manifesto. No mention at all of Venezuela. No mention of Russian annexation of Ukraine. No condemnation of Assad and Russia bombing hospitals in Syria. No condemnation of Iran and its malign proxy Hezbollah role in Syria or the Houthis in Yemen.

— Mike Gapes (@MikeGapes) November 21, 2019

No mention of perestroika or glasnost. A disgrace.

— Miwkhail Gorbachev (@MikeGapesMP) November 21, 2019

... people you thought were dead... Johnny Beattie, that is, 93!

even the tory SPAD channel 4 news had on was reasonably positive about the labour manifesto - 'undeliverable' seems to be the attack line they've settled on

My cartoon Thursday @TheTimes. As her popularity plummets, #JoSwinson is a victim of #FakeNews posts accusing her of attacking #squirrels .........#LibDemManifesto pic.twitter.com/qWYBOuAaXM

— Peter Brookes (@BrookesTimes) November 21, 2019

Alex is a bit busy at the moment. Hasn't Scotland got about 1 person named Johnny Beattie for every ant colony over there?

peter brookes: bad cartoonist (still), also bad explainer of his own cartoons

there's jonny beattie, johnnie beattie, and john beattie.

true Ma[s]TTers don't need to explain their work, and especially with crass fake news hashtags!

xp

just seems one of them names I've seen all over the place. Like when there were nine Tommy Joyce's at my secondary school at the same time.

No way.

i occasionally have to work with john beattie and i can confirm that he is a cunt

beat that, suzy

So Johnnie Beattie is John Beattie's son? Though, I'm not sure I'd ever heard of Johnnie Beattie before.