US Politics, November 2019: These people are truly sick.

Yeah, I Was In The Shit: Bill Murray's Wilderness Years

In a letter to Sen. Johnson, Reps. Jordan and Nunes "reluctantly write to request any firsthand information you have about President Trump’s actions toward Ukraine between April and September 2019." pic.twitter.com/ge93iaul5X

— Jeremy Herb (@jeremyherb) November 18, 2019

Always. I have a sneaking suspicion we're probably not going to like the guy they ultimately/eventually decide is a better bet than Trump

I half-suspect there is a planned Epic Troll Move to nominate Nikki Haley, Elyse Stefanik, or Sarah Palin just to trigger libs by nabbing the "first woman presidetn" title away from progressive feminists.

I'm sure it'd be easy to get about two thirds of Trump's voters to believe that he's dead and being impersonated by a Soros-deep-state crisis actor

The impostor that we now call "Paul McCartney" says he isn't busy and is willing to wear a ridiculous wig.

turn me on dead maga

House of Representatives is now investigating whether Trump lied to special counsel Robert Mueller in written answers he provided in the Russia investigation, the House's general counsel told the DC circuit Court of Appeals Monday.

— Shimon Prokupecz (@ShimonPro) November 18, 2019

Answer: yes, he did get his dick stuck in the 7-11 hot dog warmer. Again.

He said his favorite book was The Giving Tree

In reality, it's he can't read

you can do it like this and walk away:

"A few months ago, I told the American people I did not trade arms for hostages. My heart and my best intentions still tell me that's true, but the facts and evidence tell me it is not."

Easy. Peasy. With a bunch complicit assholes and ride-or-die marks.

well, ronnies wasnt sworn i guess

thread title apparently was an omen

I'm probably not the right one to complain, given my slipshod editing and poor writing on ilx, but I just rolled my eyes at this opening paragraph in an email message from a local candidate.

Long before I became a candidate for the U.S. Senate, I was a teacher -- for ten years actually. The education of our youth is so unbelievably important to me, and it breaks my heart when our kids are robbed of any opportunity to learn and reach their full potential.

At the level of an associate vice president of student affairs, say.

for ten years actually!

Years Actually

coming soon, starring Emma Thompson, Colin Firth, Kiera Knightley, Alan Rickman

because Jim Broadbent and Michael Caine were busy

Nothing says "U.S. Senator" like writing at the level of a slightly above average sixteen year old.

https://www.thehairpin.com/2013/11/10-years-actually/

The mayor of Muncie, Indiana, was arrested by the FBI in a corruption probe

Witch hunt! Deep state is outta control!! FBI is full of Dem lovers Never Tylers!

i read worse writing every day in the form of press releases from galleries.

ABC/Ipsos poll:

70% of Americans believe Trump did something wrong

57% want him impeached

51% want him impeached *and* removed from office

21% made that decision this after last weeks hearings

Those are some terrible numbers for Trump after just one week of public hearings.

— Josh Jordan (@NumbersMuncher) November 18, 2019

A White House official tells me this morning’s Fed meeting took place in the White House residence - the president’s personal quarters- not in the West Wing, where the Oval Office is. I am told the president has not yet been in the West Wing today.

— Eamon Javers (@EamonJavers) November 18, 2019

Well, duh. They need to transfer him to one of those hospital beds with wheels first.

57% is a pretty eye-popping stat

xps

Also: "21% made that decision this after last weeks hearings."

how is that possible considering the hearings have historically low levels of pizazz

https://t.co/BKo27n6tmz

— Donald J. Trump (@realDonaldTrump) November 18, 2019

lmao Nov 26 is a Tuesday

21% mad at Trump for not doing more exciting crimes

I love an angry grandma
https://thehill.com/homenews/house/470960-house-dem-slams-trump-frankly-id-like-to-impeach-the-bastard-right-now

A @CBSNews investigation has uncovered a possible pay-for-play scheme involving the Republican National Committee and President Trump's nominee for ambassador to the Bahamas.
https://t.co/cx1JQpexjL

— CBS This Morning (@CBSThisMorning) November 18, 2019

he was asked to buy the maga hat for $500k, totally cool and totally legal.

that sounds like business as usual to me, if, like everything trump does, a little more blatant

i mean dan rooney wasn't particularly qualified to serve as ambassador to ireland

Vindman understandably nervous and absolutely crushing it.

Vindman's nervous, inspiring opening statement was, to coin a phrase, unimpeachable.

Jinx!

our man still hasn't surfaced FYI

Memorandum from the President’s Physician pic.twitter.com/yzkjqCBBHc

— Stephanie Grisham (@PressSec) November 19, 2019

Disclosing just the cholesterol is bizarre

Yeah, he definitely underwent some specialized cardiac or neurologic evaluations. I was skeptical before, but I'm convinced now.

He’s probably fine but they’re so shifty and weird about everything

Guys, they went out of their way to say this DEFINITELY isn't a cardiac issue. ABSOLUTELY NOT, how DARE you, sir.

And they're even going to check up on it in a couple months to make quadruply sure that it isn't a cardiac issue, totally normal procedure, nothing to see here.

Just seems stupid to lie unless it’s something severe. But they also love lying.

It would be funny if he just disappeared but the tweets kept coming and the white house acted like everything was normal.

There is no way his cholesterol is that normal.

he is on statins

cholesterol listed but not blood pressure. hmm

Just in: President Trump's blood pressure reported to be perfect over beautiful

oh my god Nunes is gonna spend the whole 45 minutes asking "are you aware of this Hunter Biden thing"

Seems like a massive waste of time

oh my god he's gonna accuse them of leaking to the press

I don't know how anyone, even a Republican, can listen to Nunes without their eyes rolling so far back it causes some sort of retinal damage. Yet in bizarro world Shifty Schiff is the liar and Nunes is the truth teller.

It’s pretty crazy that trump imperiled his presidency to get dirt on biden when there hasn’t even been a single primary yet and he has no way of knowing who the nominee will be.